How do you guys clean up after masturbating...

How do you guys clean up after masturbating? I've been using socks for years because I don't want the sticky cum to get anywhere. Is there a way to masturbate without getting cum everywhere and without a sock?

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bruh just jerk it with cheap condoms. costs like 10-15¢ per nut and is the true scholarly method of self stimulation.

Condoms feel wierd. Atleast a sock is comfy.

I've always used some toilet paper, i mean, whem I'm just about to nut I take the paper and cover me dick while I lay on my sideway, then just get rid of the paper.
Sometimes I use condoms or even gloves.

I just cum on my girlfriend and let her sort it out.

Dafuq?!
Dude socks actually burn my skin
Condoms are the best option

a lubed condom doesn't feel as good as a sock to you? I'm sorry m8, maybe you should just stick to the socks. I used to be like you, even bought the small girl socks that were most comfortable on my dick.

I cum directly into the toilet

no mess, no fuss

the cum stays inside my uncircumsized 3 inch penis foreskin, then I just walk to the bathroom and squeeze it out.

But jerkin it standing just isnt the same

This. Also doesn't hurt to have a window in said bathroom with hot neighbors.

Lmao,only spermsucking fags clean up their cum. Just fuckin cum in your underoos and let it fester.

I always stand up right when I'm about to cum. Sitting while cumming feels unfulfilling.

I shower. I catch it in my off hand, start my shower and hop in.

Ive tried that but some cum always manages to spill and gets on my chair and carpet.

The standing cum is definitely more primal/adrenaline

I jerk it in a more comfy location and move to the bathroom for the last minute or so

Same here

I tightly press down on my perineum when I cum. I have not ejaculated when masturbating in over 10 years.

this but unironically

I pretty much only masturbate in the shower. On my knees in the shower and just nut on the drain (or as close to it as I can).

The only downside is it can be tough to watch porn at the same time. So I’ve either gotta watch porn first, then jump in the shower and fantasise, or open the shower door and have an iPad or laptop or whatever on the floor.

I just jerk off sitting on the toilet and cum in the bowl, and flush away my DNA

Explain yourself

Eat it. I'm not wasting my seed, better to recycle it. That way I am big cums to my penis.

I often used a white towel for weeks or even months. After one or two weeks, there are cute yellow stains on the white surface. After a month it starts to smell awesome. My ex gf liked it as well. Sometimes she wanted me to rub her face with the towel to make her smell like it. Sadly it didn't worked.

Put your phone in a zip lock bag.

just when I am cumming, I put my finger over my urethra hole and then stand up and let it out in a trash can or the toilet.

Based

>go into living room at night
>shoot load onto living room carpet
>grind it into carpet with my boot
>family walks barefoot next day
>they complain the carpet feels weird at spots
>the devil laughs with me

I go to the bathroom. Turn on the faucet to cover the noise. Sit on toilet and fap. Jizz on carpet. Pour a little water on the carpet to cover the jizz markers. Pull up pants and watch tv

I squeeze my foreskin shut and go to my cats litter box in my room to make a deposit

I bought a pack of cheap washcloths from Walmart like six years ago.

Lmao monster

I cum all over my hands and then lick it up

Totallynormalandwelladjusted/10

Most of the time I just eat it. Been doing it since I was a kid. I don't particularly like it or anything. I wont eat it if theres an easier way to deal with it like if I'm in the shower. But if im laying in bed and jerking I'll just kinda slowly cum onto the hand I'm jerking with then lick it off. Not a big deal.

I have long forgotten about this method

i just lay on my back in bed and put a paper towel on my belly. wtf is wrong with ya'll?

Either let it fly on my sheets or where ever below my waist or in my underwear mostly. Once awhile in toilet paper/tissues

This but unironically

Waterproof cases exist

If I’m in the shower I just cum and wash it down drain, if middle of the day I’ll go into bathroom, jerk it on toilet and as I’m about to cum I’ll lean toward so dick is inside toilet bowl and cum, try not to touch water. If I’m in bed I just cum on my stomach and wipe with a towel

this guy jews

I wish they made condoms with the inside texture of a sock. That would be great.

Used thosed free condoms given in college and put it on my dick, it is too tight around it. One was a magnam. I jerked off using it w/ lube too.

Im condom free, I let my girl figure out the rest

I always masturbate sitting down or laying on my back so I just cum on my belly and clean it up with tissues.

I wasn't being ironic. I just ate my load about an hour ago. It does actually make my later loads bigger.

I dont cum anymore so im saving 928 million future me's. Each one now is saved for my girl

I assume this causes retrograde ejaculation where the sperm travels into the bladder instead out of the penis. Next time you pee the cum will get out with it.

I definitely have to try this as well.