My OCD is ruining my life. It is holding me from doing anything at all. I'm imprisoned. I want it to GO AWAY

My OCD is ruining my life. It is holding me from doing anything at all. I'm imprisoned. I want it to GO AWAY.

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The same.
It's getting really bad. Every single day it's something new to drive myself insane over.

I don't know when I'll finally seek help but I've got to do something

You're the person who is worried about inhaling particulates in the air?

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Posted this in a similar thread but I had severe OCD that ruined my life in many ways, got helped a ton by medication. On Venlafaxine which works great, would recommend trying it

I am.
I have almost three years of this now, every day. I want to explode. I'm trapped. I do nothing now. I don't brush my teeth. I don't bathe. I don't leave bed. I don't open my mouth to speak. I don't speak to anyone. I can't do anything without a huge argument with myself. I went to a store to purchase earphones and spent probably one hour just standing in the aisle thinking whether or not I should purchase these $10 earphones, which to purchase etc.. going into the country of origin, materials used in the product which will contact my skin and the toxicology of them, the morality of giving myself earphones, whether or not I deserve it.
I want to explode.
I don't want to do that. It will require rituals just to see a paychologist. My OCD tells me that it's actually good for me. It "keeps me in touch with hardship and makes me stronger than other people for enduring it". It's making me into a masochist or something. Even when I say "this is not good for me" My OCD twists it into why it IS good for me.

NOW, i've done it for almost 3 years, so my primary issue is
>you'e come this far, if you quit now them you're a weak failure. You will never amount to anything if you can't do this. You can' handle one more day of rituals? You're pathetic. You're just like everyone else. You'll never be the person you've always wanted to be. He would be capable of enduring this.
Them I say "I can't quit now. After 3 years, I'm too far into it to quit. I want to prove the OCD wrong. I am strong and can do it."

I feel like it makes me feel superior to others, or special, because they wouldn't be able to endure this. What a joke. What a disgusting logic this disorder gives you. I hate it. I hateit so much. It is ruining my life. It is taking everything away.

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I had OCD for years. A very severe form. I fixed it with no medication. I can help you if you want, but I need to understand certain reasons for why you are doing it. My rituals used to take up 10-12 hours every day for nearly 2 years. It is honestly fixable but requires real effort and introspection.

>I need to understand certain reasons for why you are doing it.
You would need to elaborate.

I have OCD too OP. How is your diet? I've greatly improved my OCD recently by changing what I eat, but I'm still working on improving it even more.

I'm sorry to hear that fren. I have OCD as well. I'm 24 and have suffered from it for 10-11 years now. It got a lot better when I went to therapy when I was around 14, but it's gotten worse in recent years. Have you seen any specialists?

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My diet is very restricted. Right now, I only eat four items(including water). I eat the exact same thing each day. It requires rituals. It is tedious and painful.
I have not. I almost did but then I did not bother going. They won't help me. My OCD will just twist everything they say like it does with these threads.

OCD is treatable

They can help you a lot fren. Cognitive behavioral therapy significantly reduces how much the intrusive thoughts control you. You should at least look into it fren. A psychiatrist might also be another one you should see, there are medications that can help lessen the effects of OCD. Don't given up hope fren, do it for you.

I can't stop. It's my entire environment causing it, but I only have $2,000-$3,000 so moving out is practically guaranteeing homelessness and then I have huge problems. I'm trapped. If I suddenly had the money to move out and away from here then the OCD would disappear almost instantly. I just don't have the funds and I don't have a way to obtain them. I'm trapped in hell.

I need to understand what is actually causing it. Deep down, there are rooted reasons for why you feel compelled to do these things. If you don't want to talk to somebody on a taiwanese basket weaving forum about it, then find a cognitive behaviour therapist who you can talk to. If you ever do want to talk about it though, I will give you any advice I can for how I resolved a lot of my problems. It was very frustrating for me, because for years I was given nonsensical advice so I always try to empathise with threads like this.

I don't know if I could do that. I don't know where to start. I feel like i'm already gone. Even if I want to explain it, I don't know how.

Have you gotten your Trumpbux yet? That should help. Look into moving where you want while this whole quarantine thing is going on so that when it finally ends you can go where you want. Don't give up fren.

I have not and probably won't. I'm assuming the worst.

Wait how is your environment causing your OCD? Can you elaborate?

It'll come user. Don't assume the worst. Don't give up fren, please. Do you need to talk?

I don't feel like I can be contaminated outside of where I live. It's a childhood home where people whom I hate and absolutely despise live. I definitely have PTSD from many very bad memories here. The OCD is probably a coping mechanism for the extreme anxiety. Until I can leave, it will never go away. I can't leave, so it will never away. I cannot afford to do it. Risking homelessness is suicidal.

I can see as many therapists as I want but they will not help me get out, so it will never change.
-physically opening my mouth? My OCD doesn't really allow me to do that outside of eating. The air is contaminated. Giving up would be if I quit the rituals, or at least that's what the OCD says.

No I meant just like if you were feeling bad and needed to talk to someone.

Jesus christ you sound like a massive fucking loser. Is this your endgoal ? Shitposting on a malaysian knitting forum ? You have litterally declined EVERY piece of advice in this thread. Go fucking neck yourself you pessimistic faggot. I hope you botch the job so the cops can legally force you into therapy, you actually sound like you need help.

This is going to sound weird but have you looked into the Law of Attraction? It's a lot to go over but you should look into it, it changed my life. It didn't necessarily help with OCD but it has brought me things in my life I really wanted. If you believe, you will be able to acquire some way to get out of your situation. Maybe it will be in the form of money, maybe someone will be willing to help you out, etc.

I'll ingest particulate matter from the contaminated air which could affect me mentally/cognitively(t.gondii is only one example as cats live here as well), possibly make me more like the people here whom i hate and want nothing to do with.
I always feel bad. There is nothing to feel good about.
Of course I need help. It completely controls my life to the point that I have zero life. I can't seek help because I have the OCD. It controls everything.
I do not recall. The OCD is my primary issue. If I were not here then I could excel in whatever I wanted.

you need to be more considerate, my friend. he has an illness.

Google the Law of Attraction and read into it. If you really believe, you can change your life.

lol OP this is literally
>The Secret
nonsense. Don't listen to this retard.

Many people including myself have experienced it. It has changed my life. I haven't seen The Secret so I can't comment. It's up to OP if he wants to try it but that's the advice I can give.

>There is nothing to feel good about.
Yes there is fren. This will pass and things will get back to normal pretty soon. What is it that you want to do and where do you want to move to?

It's too depressing to talk about. What does it matter? It's not going to happen. It's been this way for years now.

What do you want to happen? You can make it happen fren. Don't give up. How old are you? It's never too late.

I don't know if this is OCD but I get this urge to do the same task over and over again until it's 10, or if I do something an odd number I have to make it even. For example if I blink one time it's odd, so I have to blink twice to make it even. Or I just decide to make it 10 times. If I tap my thigh with my finger same thing, got to do it 10 times. I also have some weird ass rhythmic thing where I can't have a clock in the same room with me where if my heart beats aren't aligned with the "tick tock" sounds I get anxiety and think my heart is going to stop.