I am an airport security screener. Ask me anything

I am an airport security screener. Ask me anything.

Attached: airport-security.jpg (500x375, 71.56K)

Are you an asshole in your personal life too?

How many of your coworkers have tested covid positive?

Can you describe the most invasive types of body searches being conducted?

I try not to be. Nor at work, nor in my personal life.
To this day, 0.
Depends. For me, the most invasive are the ones on kids. I feel that is really wrong doing that and it's really really invasive.
Otherwise, it's pretty normal to have people strip in a private room if we think they hide something or can't be searched in front of other people. Like if they have something hidden in their underwear. Which is more common than you think.

WTF are they hiding in their drawers? kek

What's the most amount of dicks that have been inside you at the same time

What's the quickest way to get fisted?

How much of your job is stopping terrorist vs groping people.

So if there's suspicion that someone has prohibited items, they may have to get fully nude in front of others?

Do they gotta spread them cheeks and cough?

How to get few lets say 5g of weed or some aprox 20 seeds through ???

Mostly, money. I've seen countless tourists hiding money in their underwear. Some of them have those "hidden" pouch inside their pants in which they put all sorts of things: keys, phone, wallet.
Figuratively, 5. Actually, 0.
Put some drug in your ass. Then the customs will treat you. Huge bonus if you have a latex fetish.
Good question. I don't know. Mostly it's a deterrent, it's harder to do a terrorist attack. But our job it's not only to prevent terrorist attack, it's also to prevent dangerous situations, like panic onboard.
Yes. But, trust me, nobody wants to do that just because they feel it. The procedures are a total pain in the ass, police has to get involved and you can have a penal charge on you if you're just being a dickhead.
We don't deal with drugs. Sorry to disappoint.

Where can we find body scan images of babes?

We don't use body scanners, thankfully, I might add. We rely on our old friend, the metal detector.
We do still have body scanners, but they show an iconography of the human body, not the actual scan, and the part where the alarm is generated.
Basically we see the image out of a bathroom sign and the part that generates an alarm is highlighted. No free boobies, sorry. Or dick, if that's more your thing. I don't judge.

What’s your job?

Boobies

>No free dick
THEN WHY THE FUCK DO YOU EVEN HAVE THAT JOB >:(

What’s the most interesting thing you have found someone trying to hide?

Ha ha ha “boobies”.

Why would you take a minimum wage job that shits on the Constitution? Do you have no shame?

How long of a break did you take between the time you quit Taco Bell and the time you started at TSA?

The short answer is to be sure that you can't bring down a plane or cause any harm to anyone after the security check.
Nope. But it's not like you don't see them during the shift, both from colleagues and passengers. Especially during summer.
I said no pictures. You can touch all the dick you want.
A remotely controlled vibrator. The catch is that it was inside a girl. Also, very interesting are everyday objects with hidden knives.
It's not minimum wage. It's above average, really.
I do not work for the TSA.

have you ever found a 'client' hiding a weapon / prohibited item / dangerous memento?

>You can touch all the dick you want
:D

Above average is a cop out, post a paystub or it's minimum wage.

Wanna do some trivia?

When people get stuff confiscated do you get to take it home?

What’s the most foolproof way to smuggle a small amount of drugs through security?

How long have you been working there?

How much to bribe a faggot like yourself?

Yeah. I mean, that's my job. It's like asking to a mechanic if he ever found a broken car.
I found guns, knives, ammo and other dangerous stuff.
I live and work in Europe. Our national average is 1500€ a month for 40 hours a week. We don't have to pay a single cent in tax on that money. I earn about 1550€ a month and work 30 hours weekly.
Bring it on.
The rules say that we can't take anything. We don't confiscate thing, we straight up throw them away. For food/beverages, it's a big no-no. You will get immediately fired if you get caught. If it's something like a knife or a screwdriver, it's a bit easier to take them, but you technically still can't.
We don't deal with drugs. You should ask that to a custom officer.
About 10 years.
No money will get me out of jail. Sorry pal.

>A remotely controlled vibrator.
Yeah you haven't worked there long at all.

>About 10 years.
You probably don't even work there

Have you ever made a real find, or is that job as frivolous as it appears?

It was INSIDE a girl. I mean, we see vibrators a lot, but not inside people.
Also, you said that items people were trying to hide. Most things we found aren't even remotely hidden. It's just clueless people putting them into a bag.

>It was INSIDE a girl
>girl
How old we talkin?

is there any form of anonymous contact we can privately use? I would like to kind if interview you, since this thread alone got my curiosity out from below a pile of dust

That's not that weird at all honestly. Try harder

So if you search someone and do find drugs what do you do with them?

Would a paper tablet like LSD be detected?

Ok OP, i usually do history/humanites and odd movie trivia so just a heads up
Q- Arlington National Cemetery was once the home and proprety of?
A-Jefferson Davis
B- James Longstreet
C-Robert E. Lee
D-None of the Above

you ever get your thrills feeling up underage boys?