Be me, 28, and for the first time actually happy with the girl I am in a relationship with

>Be me, 28, and for the first time actually happy with the girl I am in a relationship with
>Want to move in with girl ,but have to come clean about drinking habits first
>I drink 8-12 tall boys literally every night I don't have to work the next day
>I am hung over just about every time I see her, but me as hungover is pretty much just me with some physical discomfort
>don't tell her this, but tell her about how I drink very often and a lot, and am secretive about it, even with family and close friends (of which I have few)
>She starts to cry
>I have known it is a problem, but it has never affected my work, or relationships thus far
>I know I can not quit, but I really like this girl
any advice Yas Forums?

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Slow it down and have self control. Call me a cunt but think about what's really of value here. What's at stake. Maybe AA, maybe support from her, I don't know. Have strength OP. You'll make your choice.

Switch to cocaine. She'll see you as someone with money to support a habit and you'll have more energy to help with the moving process

>Look into tapering off.
>Do not go cold turkey.
>Ask her for help.
It's gonna suck, but if you really want to quit you can do it. Also, find a hobby. No matter how dumb or small, just find something else to focus on. The real trick is you have to actually want it.
Shrooms helped me as well, microdosing.

You need to quit regardless of any girl. Or at least cut down significantly and manage forever. Just imagine the mess of yourself in 10 years time if you do nothing.

Don't try to do this on your own but contact a service or charity to help.

However, well done on being honest with her. It shows you are a decent person and actually want her to be happy.

>I know I can not quit
What a fucking shit mindset

Enjoy your bricked out liver you fucking alkie

Just buy water and drink that instead. I'm not being sarcastic, was in a similar boat a couple years back and it was comically easy. Like just try, it might be easier than you think.

She would def support me with quitting, but alcohol has honestly been the only thing to keep level headed since I was 16. As stupid as that might sound, I honestly don't know how I would cope without it.

I have tried a lot of things, maybe I should just drink water like crazy. I tried switching to coffee, and energy drinks, but I always ended up going back.

You need proper help. The fact that you recognise there is an issue is probably the most important.

Sort it out today. Ring someone up TODAY. Do it.

Dude, are you me?

Same boat as you a year ago. Still with the girl, happy and sober. Lean on her for support, she wants to help. Hit meetings. Read about habits and the addiction process. And if its comes to it, look into the medication disulfiram. Its sucks man, do it a day at a time. But the dividends pay daily. If you feel like you can control it and moderate do it. But I couldn't. This the first relationship I haven't let booze destroy. You owe it to yourself to be happy! Goodluck man

I have been playing World of Warcraft a lot more as I'm off due to Covid. TBH though, it is more fun while drinking, and having no work is just an excuse to drink more. For sure the best thing to do is quit, of course it's not as easy. I do appreciate the advice though

How do you deal with the social stuff like going to her parent's for a dinner and they offer wine, or being at a party where everyone is drinking?

Because honestly I can turn it down, but it is only because I know I will drink later.

Have you tried non alcoholic beer like o'douls
You don't need to quit but you do need to get down to only 2 beers a night. Like others have said, ask for her help

It can be tricky, the social stuff. Booze is the only drug you have to justify NOT doing. Just stick to your guns. You'll be surprised how supportive people are. The trick is to get it into your head BEFORE you there to not drink. As soon as you start rationalizing, it's over. For me, qt least. And try to think about how good you'll feel the next morning knowing you won the day before

>The problem with this data is that black men don't "date" women in the same way whites do.
hope this helps

OP here
It's hard because it is like the .one. joy. I have.
I enjoy things. I enjoy games, movies, anime, my girlfriend, etc, but just after being done with the day, letting it go with alcohol it just brings me joy. how do I let go that joy that has filled so much of my life. It's easy to say get help, well imagine taking away fucking, or masturbation. It's like, well now what when I get the urge? I dunno if family and friends support can fill that gap of joy

It was a lot easier to go without booze for a while when hangovers were bad. I used to puke my guts out, now it's just a mild discomfort. Even on my worst days, It's more like feeling tired than anything else. I am not proud of this, it just makes drinking easier and I hate that part of it.

I do think the idea of just toning down would be better than nothing. I have tried that before with 2 beers as a limit. It just gets away sometimes and it only seems to take once of twice before you just lose the good habits you make.

Dude im pretty much the same way except its a bottle of whiskey if idont have work.
Now i can control it bc the feeling of waking up NOT hungover and being able to go out and get shit done is amazing. Now i only drink a little on weekends or if i have company.

That' really good you have managed to control it. Good on you man.

What's the alternative?

If you lose your GF and start drinking like that everyday you'll lose control of your life fast.

You don't realize you're on the edge of a cliff because you are afraid to look down.

You don't have to quit or say anything or even ever get involved with things to get great benefits from attending AA meetings. Esepcially if you go regularly.

You're right TBH, I am at the edge of a cliff. It is what keeps be from fucking up my life with this I believe.
I wish there was a good alternative group to AA as part of it is essentially becoming religious. Really fucking puts me off and, in fact, upsets me there is no non 'give yourself up to a greater power' AA

Nah you don't really have to do that. Not everyone works all the steps. That's more for people who have already totally ruined their lives with alcohol.

If you find AA too intense and creepy which I totally understand I would try ACA first. Adult Children of Alcoholics.

Just remember. You don't have to do anything but listen. People will talk to you, but everyone understands if all you want to do is go and listen.

Hiding how much you drink is a sure sign you're an alcoholic.

I don't doubt I'm an alcoholic. I just don't see how I can do without it

If he drank a full bottle of bourbon it would be different, it's the quantity that scares people

You are self-medicating. I drank more than you till a month ago for about a decade. I was prescribed trazodone for sleep and anxiety and quit drinking a week after. See a doctor of some sort! Be honest with them!

Thanks I will look into that medication. when this pandemic is over I'll consider talking to my doctor as a option

Psych fag here. You have literally no business (and no right) to subject her to your life right now. Sobriety is the way forward, and that’s a process for the rest of your life. Here’s what you need to do: sit down with her (not drunk) and tell her how much you know she deserves to be happy, etc. Admit that you need to get sober, and work on yourself before you destroy yourself (let alone destroy her). Do it now before kids enter the picture. If you break up with her, then go work your program, I’ll be proud of you.

Get on a medication called disulfiram or antabuse. It’ll cure you of drinking quick af. Or move to Saudia Arabia for a year

Quit while you still can. You might think you can handle it and still fuction normally but it will catch up to you. I was drinking minimum 12 beer/day, 7 days a week before I crashed and burned. Tried to ease up and just drink socially but always wanted more. So I cut it out completely. Smoking weed helped me quit. Kinda just traded one for nice for another but it has way fewer negative effects than liquor

What a faggot you obviously like her more than alcohol then just stop drinking it

Fuck off headshrinker.

OP just stuff it down with the brown

Eat a dick, then shit it out and fuck yourself with it.