My friend basically told me I was a loser and didn't want me to hang around him and that everyone in our group felt the...

pop some percs and xans with adderall
better to die from addiction

Why don’t you approach them all at once about it. Sure your one friend said that but who knows if they all feel the same way. You might even get some respect if you confront them and ask if it’s true. And if it is true ask them why they don’t want to hang with you. Either way you’ll have some peace of mind

I don't know, I get the sense that I just annoy people, I try so hard to be like them but the truth is written across my face the whole time. Desperation, loneliness, self pity. I feel like people smell it on me like a bad cologne.

"Dude fuck off, you're not fucking funny, nobody fucking likes you "

something like that or that's how it felt

Stop trying to be funny then.
What did you say to receive that kinda reaction?

it's humiliating, I don't think that little of myself that I'll stoop to that or begging them to let me back in. I feel like we can never be friends again and that would be fine if I had anyone else or could trust anyone else.

>I try so hard to be like them
There’s your problem. Be (You)

I don't know if I've ever had a real friend. I feel like I've never been in a relationship that I wasn't putting all the effort in.

everybody in the world hates you. may as well neck

So, you feel you need to relax? ...or find some people you can relax around?

I don't remember honestly. We were just walking I said something stupid just because I feel uneasy with silence and he just tells me to stop that I'm just annoying and everyone thinks so

I was literally just thinking about this while finishing up chores not even 5 minutes ago.

I've got the same problem, OP. I don't know how to get people to genuinely "like" me and want to be around me. The only way I can seem to get that to happen is when I make myself useful to something they want or need. Since I don't know any other way to be likable, that's kinda what I've found pride in, is being useful.

It's a bad solution but it fills the hole a bit. Not really, but a bit.

I honestly don't know if it's possible, the only way I relax is when I'm totally alone. But that feeling eats at you after a while

Is that what friendship really boils down to? How useful or entertaining I am for others. I'll never have anyone who just likes me for who I am, who would stop by or invite me over just for the pleasure of my company. It will always be obligatory.

How useful or entertaining you are IS who you are to someone else. You wouldn't want to sit around watching some potato play video games in his underwear, so don't expect others to want to either. If you want people to enjoy your company than you have to be someone whose company is enjoyable.

Sorry user, but people can be like that sometimes
At most, everyone hopes they can at least have 1 friend that truly values your company
If you have more than you can count yourself lucky

finding out of it's possible sounds like a plan. especially considering this sense you have that youre annoying-- that others can detect your desperation.

So if you can't be then you have to be someone you're not so that you can keep those people. You do the little monkey dance for them and they clap at you and keep you a long a bit longer

Blowing your brains out in front of them is the quickest why to get friends. If someone dies everyone is suddenly their friend so they get attention. Think of all the people that will be at your funeral?

Essentially this. I currently neet and consequently have very few friends. So long as you have a purpose they'll hang out with you.

While I was in college, I spent a decent amount of time hanging out with someone I more or less grew up with (knew each other since kindergarten, friends since elementary). We used to hangout every day in highschool. Mid semester he dropped out and got a new job, and for a week or two I gave him rides to and occasionally from work. We hung out all the time in the meantime. Then one day he needed me to take him into the city so he could board a train and visit his dad in another state who was giving him a car. I dropped him off at the train station at 6 AM and never saw or heard from him again. Its been 5 years now.

That's exactly how I feel man, but that's not what friendship--or any other relationship--boils down to, no.

Some of us just don't fit in. I'm not exactly sure why that is, but it's definitely a real thing that goes beyond any one person's anecdotal testimony.

For me, I used to think it was the way I looked. I believed for the longest time I was both horrendously ugly and autistic, and that because it was just "written on my face," people could see it, and it made them uneasy, as if I were one of those people you just wanna shoo off to some other crowd and not give them a second thought. A burden.

But I often get the same reaction out of people online, where they don't even know what I look like. I'm never the person anyone "chooses" to be around; I'm the person who offers to program them some useful program or game, or draw them some cute picture or comic, or write some immersive story or script--basically, the guy who's there to give them ideas so they can go on to fulfill their own dreams. Once that interaction comes to pass though, they'll never talk to me one-on-one again. Maybe we'll happen to share the same social circle IRL or Discord group online, but I'm more of an accessory to fill space in said groups than anything else, it seems.

It just gets tiring, and makes me feel ashamed of myself for even having the desire to be loved in the first place.

This kinda turned into a vent when I didn't intend for it to, so if this sounds like a big wall of self-pity bullshit, I'd understand the frustration. Just needed to get it out.

I hope you find the answer though, OP.

Find new friends. These ones are all Satanists. So are their parents, and so are your parents. How that ends up with them all being circled around the concept of you being the outcast is something you're better off not knowing. Just flee and leave no traces. Change names, change states, change lives. Hopefully you're not one of the valuable ones, one of the one whose life of imposed failure they've gambled a lot of money on.

I’ll be ur friend bro

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Goddamn OP shut the fuck up, you don’t need friends to be whole and stop looking for external approval. Who gives a fuck what they say? Do what you want in your life, and get the fuck out of this website

I had that once and, or I thought I did with a childhood friend. He tried so hard to get me in with his friends to include me. All I did was embarass myself and even more him. I finally just put us both out of our misery and stopped answering his messages. It didn't take that long either. Like 2 missed texts and we haven't ever talked since.

>How that ends up with them all being circled around the concept of you being the outcast is something you're better off not knowing.
Tell me anyway

>The only way I can seem to get that to happen is when I make myself useful to something they want or need. Since I don't know any other way to be likable, that's kinda what I've found pride in, is being useful.
This doesn't work out. Trust me. There will be people that will hate you beyond any reparation or offer you can make.

I don't get it either. Maybe it's just the society we're in these days. People don't have value for one another anymore. I'd be fine with death at this point; this world is too ghastly to want for.

Well, partially the issue is you already know, but you've forgotten. It has to do with something they would have done to you at a very young age. (rape) The other part is, it means they "burnt" you - as in, they've designated you the community life-long whipping boy, so they can take out all their petty little insecurities on you at a whim and then forget about it and feel actually holy and absolved. (delusional, actually) But then the worst part about it is this means you're worth a lot of money, because you had a great potential. Now other people whose children had somewhat less potential are paying to stifle your emotional and social growth to negatively impact your future career so *they* can steal all that thunder for their own kids.

Or so they think. It's all stupid and the world is burning because of this shit already, if you have been watching the news at all you might have noticed...

Well said.
Yeah, ive tried to reach out and make new friends over discord before. Usually we just play one specific game together, and when we stop playing, we drift apart. Its unfortunate, ive met alot of cool people online, but I guess they just don't care enough to stay acquainted.
Im also butt ugly, and the desire to be loved is fucking killing me.

Every holiday my family rips on me as to why I dont have a girlfriend yet. Last Thanksgiving my brother roasted me for 45 minutes straight on the topic and everyone watched on laughing. I eventually just got up and went to another room. One would hope that he would acknowledge how ugly I am and leave me the fuck alone but no.
Every time I see family from out of state, the first thing they ask me is "SO user DO YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND"? No you blind motherfuckers. I can't retain a single childhood friend, I sure as fuck don't have a mate.

What podunk hickville do you live in that you think you need to dance for the same group of retards that don't actually like you? There's 8 billion people on this planet, if one group doesn't like you then they can eat shit and you can find someone new who doesn't know you and be an entirely different person to them.

You live, feed off their hate and grow until you are beyond them. They will still hate you but you wont think about them because your life will be soo good.

Learn to deal with the silence. Don't say unnecessary things.

(and incidentally, this also means you were a good person and they couldn't twist you to evil, so they decided to do this to you instead)

*and* if you can even remember I told you all of this, there's still hope that you can figure out a way to escape them. you'll never have the life you were promised or the one you deserved, but you can still have a better life than what they're planning for you....

Go ahead and kill yourself now, it doesn't get better. It gets worse the older you get.

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thanks man

Oh fuck, we’ve got some real high school mass murders in this thread.

no, don't do *this* ... if it gets to that, at least kill your parents first.

I've reached out online before and met really cool people. But no relationships that start out with pity ever end up good. Not equal ones at least.

Kids these days like to make other kids shoot up schools or simply kill themselves.

Heroin

You're absolutely fucking whacked. Seek help.

How can I live with an empty hole in my life?

Why did they call you a loser specifically? I'm interested

Well I'm more or less one I guess. I just never knew they felt I was one let alone hated me for it.

Not the OP, but I got outed as gay at 16 (10 years ago), and the people that were my friends went on a brutal campaign across the next two years of trying to get me to kill myself by socially engineering people away from me and then humiliating me at any possible opportunity.

The really damaging thing is when you try to repair the damage done by people, but find out everyone is pretty much terrible, and will only seek to compound and do more damage to you. I don't even want to go outside anymore tbh.

When you're showing them how much you can impact their lives, be sure to ask them 'Who's laughing now, asshole?'

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Fill it with heroin and meth?

The reality friends dont matter, you will find a woman who loves you. Fuck friends fuck family, i fought my entire life to have what i have. People would give thier left nut for it. Be humble live life fuck people cause its nothing but a circus and you need to learn to be the ring leader.

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That's fucked up man, sorry that shit happened.

At the end of it all you really only have yourself and it sounds like you just need to get lost in your hobbies and tell everyone else to fuck off. The friends I’ve had in my life were usually just stumbled upon when I was doing something I enjoyed. Find a skill based activity that makes you happy and makes you a better person. I recently got into picking locks just kinda for fun, but tbh that’s a real life skill that potentially increases my likelihood to find future employment if I were to become skilled at it. there is definitely something out there for you and If you are happy doing something in life and developing skills, people will usually respect that and not talk crazy shit. And once again, if they don’t, fuck em!

It disgusts me honestly because I never feel that way towards others. So apparently I'm a freak for that. I need to be some asshole

Women are not salvation

There is a woman for everyone, what you say is true. Your happiness should not rely on a women but there is a woman out there that will care about you snd love you. You need to love yourself first.

Fuck man. Sounds terrible, but at the the same time you gotta put yourself out there. Dont live a life in isolation because people are shit. There are good ones out there.

>you will find a woman who loves you

Literally the hardest thing to do. Even rich and successful guys struggle at this. Very few men ever find a woman who actually is a good person who cares about them. Most just want financial support and/or kids, and the man can fuck off after that's done.

There really isn't. Throughout all of human history only about 40% of men procreated, whereas 80-90% of women did. It's moving back towards that with the advent of dating apps/social media.

livescience.com/47976-more-mothers-in-human-history.html

I don't know what to say, I think people are inherently evil (if you consider morality based on what they're willing to do to one another), and that when it boils down to it, we're not much better than chimps. It's extremely dangerous to enter a cage with chimps, because they'll beat, murder, rape, and eat you; that's how I see people now.

I even studied school shooters as part of my degree. Part of it was to understand why people exacted violence, and why I didn't; I think what stops me from doing it, is the notion that perhaps the predilection of the evil acts carried out against me, might only be against me. Maybe they're good people elsewhere in their lives, that will do good for someone or something. But what I also learned is that when people are constantly socially torn down and engineered against, when people find out they have no social power to levy, then violence becomes an equaliser. It becomes a way to enact repercussions on someone, when all other ideas fail.

My life is in tatters, it's been a constant spiral since then. I keep trying to make things better, but I always find some demented prick with a chip on their shoulder that wants nothing more than to take something away from me. I got nothing left to give. Frankly I think given circumstances, resisting the urge to take is a big enough gift.

You are looking toomuch into this, women over poplulate men. Also it should bever be her having control it should be you. If you had the self confidence you could convince a woman you are worth her time.

You're probably 15-19 years old , right?

>Not studying & partying

this
what actual behaviors do you exhibit that you think might annoy them apart form your fake-ass mimicry?
Do you constantly make conversations about yourself or interject irrelevant stuff? or are you unreasonably quiet? Are you a mooch or never says "thank you" when people give you things or never, even tokenistically, repays favours? Do you pussy out of doing stuff when everyone has agreed to it?
You're being awfully vague.

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How old are you? 15?

Women have control via the law. If she says you abuse her, you go to jail. She wants a divorce? You pay up. Women are in charge. Women can even choose to have the man sent to jail in alimony states.

find better frens king. Its gonna be alright.

When your life suddenly isn't simple anymore, and believe me, it's going to happen soon if it hasn't already and you just haven't noticed, you're going to remember the irony of you saying *I* was the one that needed help.

Look i dont want to give my life story, i was forever alone. I met my wife on an online dating app. I was a loser had no money my wife a solid 9/10 i compensated by being witty and smart. Years later i got my dream job i applied for 12 years. I am able to support us and give her anything she wants. But she was with me when i was a loser and had nothing. Dont hurt yourself op i had friends like you, the more you treat them like shit the more they want to be around you. Just do you.