>What do you do to deal with any negative thoughts you may have? It takes a lot to annoy me. I just roll with my thoughts and feelings, feel a bit down for a little while and the pain usually dissipates. But if I get one negative thought, such as a woman leaving, I'll also then think about how I was molested and abused etc. Think about every injustice >What keeps you going? I honestly have no clue. Haha >I guess you must be doing alright to a degree, right? I live with my foster carers still. Surely I'd be a mess if I lived alone
Also to answer your initial thread question. Your boyfriend puts his anger outward. He cannot internalize it. There was a point where I was like this, I wasn't like it for long, but I found long walks in nature sorted me out
Mason Long
Which last part famalass?
Gabriel Allen
Yes. Trauma like that can mess you up really bad.
Dominic White
Yes it really does. All of these creates a lot of anxiety, a lot of self-esteem issues and a lot of paranoia which all lead to a TRUCKLOAD of frustrations. When you feel powerless in front of everything that goes wrong with your life, you tend to see every of your problems as a massive mountain to climb that, most of the time, feels utterly impossible to climb in its entirety. That leads you to believe there's nothing you can do and you grow massively angry because of it. I'm not personally violent per se, but I can be extremelly moody and I can become inconsiderate towards the people that love me. As far as "people with my life experience" goes, I turned out fantastic, but it sure as shit didn't leave me unscathed. I have terrible self-esteem, I'm uncontrollably anxious and, ebcause of that, I tend to be way too self-focused to the point where I start feeling like people just weight me down, but I'm simultaneously deadly afraid of losing them. I tend to isolate myself a lot and I'm easily depressed despite my generally upbeat and positive attitude. I'm easily salty at videogames too. So yeah, it does turn people who go through this into aggressive and overly defensive people.
Gavin Sanchez
What is your opinion of yourself? And aside from the pursuit of love, is there anything else you hold a desire to do in life?
Zachary Thompson
Oh shit I remember reading your story from another thread. Man what a ride that must have been.
Tyler Lewis
Why do you have terrible self esteem, why are you anxious, and what do you mean by self-focused? And what is your opinion of your deathly fear of losing those who love you?
David Cook
It might. But it might also do the opposite. I experienced all those and now I'm just super timid and kinda unable to get angry. Well I might get angry but it doesn't show outside in a any way. Also I don't really know how to interact or talk with people. Still, I believe that most of the factors are from genetics rather than upbringing.
Noah Perry
Do you hold an opinion to the effect of, I do not have the right to get angry or any sort of anger of mine will not be tolerated? Also, do you hold a fear that people actively gang up on you if you disclose or tell them the wrong thing?
Asher Gonzalez
>Aggression I'm openly passive but the minute I think I have some sort of control I become aggressive and overbearing
I hate that this is my mindset and im trying to change it. Fuck bullies and fuck shit parents i'm ruined.
