It hurts

I'm going to ghost my gf of multiple years because I know it's best for her. I've started to develop into even more of a loser over the past year and I feel like I'm holding her down. I'm probably going to kill myself soon as well. I know I'm making the right decision but it is so painful. Have any anons here faced similar dilemmas?

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I did the same thing and it was for the best. Good luck OP

No it's whats easiest for you, just break up with her ya little bitch.

There's a million other dudes who would love to have a loving gf, and here you are being a little bitch and wanting to dump her, just for the sake of feeling even more like a loser and muh drama.
She's been with you for years, she fucking loves you RETARD. Some people will go their entire life without ever being loved by another human being.

So please, keep her. If you don't do it for her or for yourself, at least do it for us.

I appreciate it
I've tried to before but she always convinces me that she loves me and that I make her life better. It's a whole cycle at this point. I got to just end it.

I love her and that's why I want her to have better. I don't care about anything else at this point. It feels great that she loves me but it's not about how I feel.

Then dont be a pussy and get better so you can both be happy

I can't just get rid of all my mental illnesses user. I have depression, OCD, and a plethora of anxiety issues. I can't just work to make them go away.

I agree with this for the most part. She obviously loves you so what makes you think that she would be happier without you? If she is constantly wanting you back after you try to break away then she obviously is okay with any flaws you may have. If for some reason you feel as if you don't love her I would understand, but then be a man and break up with her and just deny when she tries to start it back up. I am telling you though, if she has been with you for so long then she obviously loves you despite your problems and honestly that is something that not many people on this board have including myself.

Hahahhaha, it's going to backfire and she'll end up killing herself, it will all be your fault OP.
You're doing this because you love her? Well I guess if you think driving her to suicide is better for her than being alive then I guess go for it.

user it sounds like you have borderline personality disorder
look into DBT self help, it might be of use to you

Remember OP, every moment you keep her chained to you is a moment she could've spent with someone who can treat her better. Stop talking to her right now.

Hey, man. You say it's not about how you feel, but it's pretty clear you're just trying to find an excuse and "it's for her own good" is the only thing you can grab right now. Because you know this girl loves you. Trust me, I've been there, I've wanted to run away because I thought I couldn't handle the guilt of feeling like I was wasting her time. But we don't get to decide how someone else feels. You gotta stop projecting onto her, and trust what she says even if you don't believe it.

Please, homie. Don't throw a good thing away like this. I know you feel like you're hurting her by being with her, but I guarantee the only thing that would hurt her is if you left.

This isn't the time. This isn't the place. You've got something special. Please don't throw it away.

this. my boyfriend also feels shitty a lot of the time and feels like hes just horrible to me and he doesnt deserve me but i love him and i accept his flaws, if he just decided to ghost me and not talk to me again id be so fucking hurt and end up killing myself most likely, hes all i have in life anymore. if she really loves you user, then dont do it. she will be hurt, extremely hurt. be glad you have a loving gf who has stayed with you for all those years, other people on here have never had a gf and would do anything to have one.

also this.. my boyfriend has bpd and feels this way a lot, he hasnt ever properly done it though but has done shit like not talk to me for a week because he doesnt want to hurt me for once or something when thats exactly what hurts me. im

I hope this is a bait thread. Ghosting people, especially a partner, is horrible.

I seriously doubt this.
I've never considered this and I'll look into it. I believe a lot of my concerns are legitimate though.
I know, it's just really hard
Whenever I talk to her I just can't get this thought out of the back of my head. When I called her last night, I could barely focus. I just kept thinking about how shitty I was for being with her when I know she could do better. I know it might just be in my head but I can't shake it.
I certainly don't want to hurt her feelings but I think even if it hurts her in the short-term, it will be beneficial for her moving forward. I'm a burden.

>Ghosting people, especially a partner, is horrible.
Why would you say this? I'm sure it's unpleasant for people involved but why do people think ghosting in particular is bad?

Abandonment has always been considered a bad thing. Anything that denies closure or understanding is always horrible, and depending on how much you trust the people who ghosted you, it can take a long time until the confusion subsides and you fully realize what happened. Whenever some very close friends of six years ghosted me a long time ago, it took around eight months to transition from a confident "I'm sure they're just busy with something, they'll be back" to an uncertain "Something seems wrong, but I trust them, they wouldn't just abandon us" to "Something is wrong... they're avoiding us, aren't they?"

>I seriously doubt this.
And yet basically reaffirms my point since it's actually someone in a very similar situation.
You should never underestimate how much ghosting someone can hurt a person, especially considering the fact that she obviously loves you.
Her mind will likely turn to the worst case scenarios for why you ghosted her (I know mine does whenever I get ghosted) so it only makes sense that someone who is likely much more emotional than I am would end up killing themselves.
Only reason I haven't killed myself is because I'm a stone hearted freak, but that isn't the case for her I would think.
Don't just pass this off as trolling either, I'm being dead serious with everything I've said so far.

not OP but does this mean ghosting is a good form of revenge?

If it's someone who cares about you, it's the worst thing you can do, yes. I'd rather she cut off my limbs one by one and killed me than ghosted me.

>You should never underestimate how much ghosting someone can hurt a person, especially considering the fact that she obviously loves you.
She's not the most social person but she has a few friends. I don't think she'll kill herself and in the long run it's best for her. I'm pretty set in my decision.

Take medicine, fucktard. It can help. At the absolute worst, properly break up. Don't ghost.

Kill yourself or break up with her like a man

You shouldn't leave her!!! If you feel like you're holding her down then talk to her about it. Don't just stop talking to her you have to try and work your problems out. If you love her you will stay with her and maybe she can help you to become a better person. You should try to become better and don't kill yourself there is so much you could be doing don't give up user!!! Everything is going to be ok don't worry!!!!

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>she has a few friends
then what's so hard about leaving her? she has other people around her. and logically, if you ghosting her does hurt her she has friends who can help her recover like it was nothing.

>Take medicine, fucktard. It can help
Most meds don't work on me because of my digestive issues. I'm committed to killing myself anyway.
>At the absolute worst, properly break up. Don't ghost.
She always convinces me that I shouldn't leave her. I'll warn her before I do it but then I'm blocking her.

I did the same thing and I regretted it more than anything.
Are you really going to be okay when she starts dating another guy? No, you're gonna want to die.
I'm a med student now, I was only a few years away from not being a loser anymore, but I acted rashly and paid the price. Don't fucking do it dude, it's not the right decision. You're going to break her heart too and she won't know why. Just be a better person tomorrow than you were today.

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>then what's so hard about leaving her? she has other people around her. and logically, if you ghosting her does hurt her she has friends who can help her recover like it was nothing.
That was exactly my point user
The plan is to kill myself after I give her some sort of closure.

So what if she has a few friends? I always had friends but it's not like I would talk about them about stuff like that.
Don't think that her having friends will magically solve her problems.

>I'll warn her before I do it but then I'm blocking her.
I'd recommend not doing this.

Nigga you are just being a little bitch. Cherish this woman and cherish your life. If you aint serious about yourself just off yourself, fuck closure. But just know that you are wasting something that people in here would kill for.

>just off yourself, fuck closure.
I agree with these anons that any idea of "closure" you think you may be offering her is just an illusion. If I were you I'd kill myself without saying goodbye. It will be less heartbreaking for the both of you.

That's not how people work, user.

>"Hmm this deep romantic relationship of mine came to an abrupt end, but I'm not heartbroken because I have friendz lol"

You can't fill up the hole left behind by the loss of a deep relationship with comparatively shallow ones.

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