It seems logical to choose it? I'm confused
How have you been doing lately, anons? Feel free to vent here or talk about whatever...
Ryan Bennett
Nathan Roberts
Maybe, maybe not. I haven't been using this character for a while but I don't see many people using him either, so maybe I am, but I don't recognize you namefag.
>I try to incite discussions on this board I get ignored. I wonder if my "insight" on whatever I choose to share on this board is simply boring to anons.
I was told recently that the reason sometimes (most times) people drop off conversations with me is because I try to put effort in my replies or incite conversations or something like that. But I think the fact is that I overwhelm people with my opinions or ideas in most cases, it seems to be the case, since for whatever reason I tend to write a lot and even not make sense or contradict myself, feels like.
Maybe it does mirrors, in this sense our place in life. But does it really matters? Maybe at the moment, but in the end, looking at the big picture, we will all just fade away someday and be forgotten, so whatever we do doesn't means much.
>I wonder if, like my posts, I have a place in a few others lives' by way of providing a brief and fleeting moment of engaging conversation... or something like that
Well, in this case yes.
Yes, life and death are as meaningless. The only reason we fear death or whatever, is because of how our brains are wired and programmed, the same reason we need some kind of "social interaction" even thrhough the internet, as meaningless as it might seem to some people, it provides you with that need to "belong" or whatever the nonsense is.
So, in this sense, being alive or being death only matter to us because we are self-conscious creatures, aware of ourselves and the experiences we have. At the end, life has no intrinsic meaning and the one you give to it is only your own, there's no correct way to live or whatever, so being alive is more of a an illogical choice than killing yourself.
John Adams
Are you saying i'm right to feel suicidal?
Lincoln Walker
Yes. Why wouldn't you be? Why wouldn't anyone be right to feel suicidal or not? It is their right to end their own existence or delude themselves into finding some meaning.
There's no reason for anything in this place or the universe itself.
Jose Ward
I used to be like that in the past. Emotions are weird, they are what keeps you going, keep that in mind.
Cameron Ward
I'm not really a namefag. Very rarely I do so. I think its only the second time I've done so.
I think you're somewhat like me. When you describe your conversation patterns I see myself in it a little. Something about my posts put people off, perhaps it seems like I take things too seriously. I take random, picayune things serious enough to write detailed "effortposts", or effort texts. Irl I dont have this problem as much, its a different realm entirely, I dont have time to think about what Im going to say during a live conversation, so my insights come through in bits and pieces, surely this way is more palatable for most everyone.
Bentley Adams
I guess so, I think you described it very well. I have more time to think here, online, to put more effort in my replies and try to make some sense and try to "understand" or whatever the other person is telling me. In real life is totally different. I act on by the moment, not thinking much and just saying/doing whatever comes from "impulse" I guess. I also don't expand as much as a I do in real life as online.
Maybe that's a big problem, what do you think?
Brody Myers
Hello Johan, I know you're likely talking to other anons, but I'll vent as well even if noone replies to my post. How am I to forgive myself for all of my past failings. I've fallen to my vices too many times and I cannot seem to change. I understand that I need to change my ways in order to function and be happy, but I generally do the same thing everyday only with slight variations that smooth out over time turn into a dull hum. If I am too comfortable with my pathetic state, when will I gather enough strength to fix things? (You cannot answer that question in full for you do not know me, but still I had to ask). Knowing that there exists steps I can take to help myself and yet not engaging with them is incredibally frusterating (luckly I have no friends for if I did they would have to listen to my self-pity daily). I have to beg myself to do the most rudimentary of tasks and even then I complain. I want to beat myself until I cant stand, I want to be punished severely, but I know that will not solve my problem. In summary, I want to die for being unable to cope with my inadequcies and being constantly out of sync with myself.
Liam Lee
well it sounds like you're saying "go ahead it do it whatever nothing matters"
keep me going to the grave?
Tyler Moore
Well, that's something hard to do, forgive yourself, I have never done so as I am my own judge and I judge myself more severely than others.
>In order to be happy
Maybe you're looking at this in the wrong way. I have always thought that people who seek happiness are somewhat very wrong for doing so. If you take into consideration the balance of what the human experience is and what the human life in general brings to a person, it's mostly just all "bad" things. Happiness is fleeting and gets away quite easily. So maybe, what you should be reaching for is some kind of stability withing yourself and some content with whatever you can achieve or get in this life.
>(You cannot answer that question in full for you do not know me, but still I had to ask).
Yes, I do not know your situation, and even if I did, I couldn't give you a satisfactory answer as I don't know you or could never understand yourself better than you, and even if you get a better understanding of yourself, not even you can truly understand yourself in the end.
So it depends, in my opinion. It will either be some kind of "spark" eventually when you get so disgusted with your current self that you say you have had enough and start to do things, or just keep falling to the bottom. To me, both things are the same.
But maybe if you did, if you find some actual real friends, they would actually listen to you and help you see somethings you're overlooking, understand or at least make you realize somethings in a better way. I know how hard it is to make actual friends like that, so that's more like a "fantasy" or something, idk. But maybe that would be the thing to push you over to do things you need to do.
I am full of regrets and I don't feel like I have ever belonged anywhere, a by-stander or whatever. Sometimes, it is just easier to give up and give in to the reality of what you are, even in your own life. I am not really sure. Should we try even if we somewhat know how things will end?