why the fuck does marriage seem so pointless
ive always wanted to get married and have kids but lately i feel like all i see is divorces and unhappy marriages that lead people to alcoholism and treating their kids like shit.
in fact i myself cant imagine being happy with one girl for longer than a two or three years, i dont know how people fucking do it brahs. whats the secret? what am i not understanding?
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Idk but dont get despaired into not trying. If it doesnt work out it doesnt work out. It is what it is but dont just give up like that
divorces disproportionately happen to the poor, ethnic, and under-educated, so just don't be trash and you can have a happy life with a loyal wife and beautiful children.
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since about two years ago, I've plateaued there and keep getting injured and then fucking quarantine happened and my gym closed so now I'm focusing on core, flexibility, and going on some nice runs now that the weather has improved.
A lot of those are people that got married and/or within a year of knowing each other. The bigger part of them are people that don't know the meaning of sacrifice.
and/or engaged
Its cause you are a virgin incel with little to no interactions with women
The divorce rate is dropping. The older generation talk like the breakdown of marriage is fated to go on forever. Turns out it was just another boomer meme, like multi-generational homes being for losers, or college being an absolute necessity for success, or religion being unimportant.
>women
never ever
ive been with plenty of women
+ post body
>whats the secret?
Vet your beloved before getting married, rather than settling down with the first girl that dates you longer than a few months. I had 2 2+ year relationships before I met my wife, and both of those girls would have been awful to have actually tied the knot with (and 15 years on, both are still single)
>it was a boomer problem
>it's millennials divorcing en masse
because people (especially women) would rather give up than work through their problems.
4 ever a boy
This. My wife and I dated 6 years before we got married and we couldn't be happier.
The vetting is the important part. You could marry someone within 1 year, if you vetted them well enough
Divorces are more common because people get married for the wrong reasons and/or rush into it. People have no patience these days and they rush into marriage after a year of knowing somebody. Most of the women are just desperate for that big day that's all about them. Don't get married just for the sake of getting married.
Find a good girl, get to know her, live with her for a while. Consider if she is actually going to be a suitable mother to your children. Living with her is important because you don't see all the shit they do when stressed or don't get their own way until you spend time living with them.
Don't think with your heart. Think with your head. Don't settle for crazy
No you can't. 1 year isn't long enough to vet somebody. The relationship is barely out of the honeymoon phase and there is no way you've lived with her long enough at that point to know all the things about her that will irritate the fuck out of you
What does vet means?
Post your wamen you fucking simp
My parents dated from '86-'93 before getting married and they've been happy ever since. Just gotta take your time with it, I guess.
Because it is outside of a certain context.
Getting married for "true love" is naive at best and actively moronic at worst. You should only be getting married because you wish to have a family of your own as the absolute minimum. I've never understood people who get married solely for the sake of a fleeting emotion for each other. Obviously you should love the person you are marrying, but what differentiates a long term relationship from a marriage is the willingness to tie your soul to another person and have the same general goals in life.
The more I interact with women the more I hate them
You really only need a couple months of living experience to see how they live. It's just like when you get a roommate, you'll know right away if you can tolerate them or not.
1 year is a long ass time, if you hand out with 1 person most of that time you will know a good enough part of them. Honeymoon phase, no honeymoon phase it doesnt matter. As long as she is willing to compromise, and you're willing to compromise that's basically all you need for a marriage to work. I would agree that usually longer is better, but to say you HAVE TO wait 2+ years is also incorrect.
t. 20 year old
1 year is not a long time.
I feel like we were never supposed to over-analyze relationships the way we do now as a society. Meta obsession has ruined another game.
You don't have a fucking clue. How old are you? You think somebody acts the same after two months of living together as they do after 4 years? Not a chance. You're in the honeymoon phase of the relationship and the honeymoon phase of a new house. People may be willing to compromise for a few months but they can change pretty damn quick when they start to think that they never get their own way on certain things.
Date them long enough to see how they react in certain situations and see how they relax around you and if their deeply held beliefs that aren't spoken about at the beginning are compatible with yours.
be rich and well associated
>1 year is a long ass time
This is what I'm trying to say. People are thinking too much about it.
ITT: you have to vet
>you have to know how she is when she is happy
>you have to know how she is when she is mad
>you have to know how she is when she is tired
>you have to know how she is on Monday
>you have to know how she is on a full moon
>you have to know how she is when it rains
>you have to know how she is when the grocery store runs out of her favorite food
Like bruh. If you guys fight, and can resolve that like reasonable adults, that's literally 80% of the job done. Next make sure you both have the same goals, expectations regarding family matters, and responsibilities handling money.
That's literally it. Takes about a couple months to a year. There is no need to have a 3 year vetting scan before you can get engaged
Got my girlfriend pregnant in our first couple months of dating and I plan on proposing by the end of the year. Am I fucked?
My brother did that 5 years ago. You're better off talking her into an abortion. My bro and his wife are not a stable couple, and both are quite obviously miserable, but now they've got 2 kids and are stuck.
Yes
Always make sure girls you fuck are liberal and will have an abortion. It's step 1. Then you ease her into your point of view until she is finally comfortable with you saying nigger around the house.
It may not be the exact same but you should be able to understand how she acts in the future based on how she acts now. If not, you have a bad ability to read people.
Marriage is a constantly evolving thing. You're not going to know how exactly everything is going to go, but being afraid of it is just going to slow you down