ITT: we create the worst game we can think of one post at a time

>A game by Gearbox Software

There is no failiure condition

The volume resets to default every time you finish a mission.

>said protagonist is worse than the average empowered female, black, LGBT, etc. It's an empowered MAP.

all characters are mixed race trannies

You have to hold down a button to run and it just barely makes you go faster, almost imperceptible

Epic Games Store exclusive

You have to walk around 2-3 minutes to get to the boss fight from the save point, and once you're there, you must watch an unskippable overly long cut-scene, which immediately puts you into a position where you have a high likely hood of getting hit before you're ready— oh, and each of the phases has their own unskippable cut scene

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Objective: RUN!

>"follow this character for 15 minutes" mission
>character walks faster than your walk but runs slower than your run

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You can't toggle crouch

Wuzzat?

The story takes place over the course of 2 years, of real time, requiring an internet connection to the developer's server for tracking time. If you're not playing the game when an event happens, you have failed and can never complete the game.

It’s single player but you always need to be online to play

Minor Attracted Person

>pressing escape closes to desktop

Multi stage boss fights with no saves between stages

OUYA exclusive
And you have to download the specifically-made EGS launcher that requires a separate verified account
And it's the only game it has

holy fuck, a MAP protagonist. Even funnier if them being a MAP has no relevance to the plot, they just randomly spout about how it's okay and shouldn't be stigmatized during cut scenes

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>fighting game where no one actually fights

Crouch is on by default and pressing the crouch key makes you stand up, no toggle either.

But that's based

Requires a UPlay account to play.

based

All loading is done via a 30-character password system that you have to manually type.

>there's a slight chance for the character to stop walking right before you hit the checkpoint

Will not run on modern software. You need to have a windows ‘95 emulator to even open the game.

X means Yes and O means no on the controller

Everything has durability, which degrades over time even when not being used. Everything. Weapons. Armour. Potions. Repair kits.

>Timed underwater escort segment
damn. that's a win.

When was a characters faggotry ever relevant to the plot?

>status ailments are impossible to be 100% resistant to because lol d20
>the majority of status ailments will completely take control away from you and most likely get you killed, or some will just straight up instantly kill you
>There are enemies that will try to inflict those status ailments to you every round just by being near them

Name the game

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keys aren't remappable, forward is bound to S, backward is bound to left arrow, right is bound page down and left is bound to middle mouse button, and jump is bound to caps lock

>NPC can trip
>tripping is entirely RNG based
>even if you play perfectly, you can lose due to pure chance if the NPC trips too much

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No even worse, a whiny white guy

First person but the camera moves in closed spaces like a third person

>NPC has a chance to remember something was in the oven
>this makes the escort mission even longer

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All in-game menus control like a modern Just Cause game.

Episodic release.

>character will automatically snap to walls and begin sidling any time you approach a wall

>you canonically lose every boss fight you win in a cutscene
>you have one weapon the entire game and no customizable moveset

>You have to escort the NPC all the way back to their house, to where you were when they remembered the oven, then the rest of the level

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Oh boy, I know how to make this even worse
>NPC stops moving if you lag too far behind or if you go too far ahead
For extra bullshittery add:
>Character comes under attack at random times and is completely incapable of defending themselces or surviving if you don't protect them

>Moral Kombat

>game has crafting
>there's always a chance you craft poorly and it destroys all the materials you used

>Final boss is a 30 minute stage with no checkpoints
>once you finish the levels the actual final boss has completely different gameplay to the rest of the game
>It has no tutorial
>dying even once resets the stage

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truly the escort mission to end all escort missions

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>there's a bonus item you get for getting the NPC through the escort section with full HP
>you can't get the true ending without it, there's no other way to get it and there's no way to retry the section without loading an old save
>last save point is over half an hour before the section starts
>section opens with 10 minutes of unskippable cutscene that launches directly into the escort as soon as it ends

>Game has a point defense section
>They are spread too far apart for you to effectively cover all of them
>Losing one point is an instant fail

Anita Sarkeesian consulting on project

>long fade after cutscene
>boss can move the nanosecond it starts and will be on top of you or worse when it's done

I remember a flash game some guys from Yas Forums made and put on newgrounds where the controls were completely broken like that, you played as a fedora nekbeard, and the game was completely unfair
and as a joke they put made by r/gaming in it and reddit took credit for making it
I can't remember for the life of me what it was called

rent free

The final level is a rhythm game with all sorts of camera fuckery.

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>There's an unskippable 30 minutes rythm minigame before the hardest boss in the game and the last checkpoint is right before that minigame

All females are replaced with jacked muscle dudes and theyre also black and jewish.

>game appears to have perfect romanceable female
>you don't actually get anywhere with her, and your toon suddenly gets with a new girl introduced at the last second

>Final boss has a solid 10-15 minutes of not difficult, but time consuming fights you HAVE to do before you attempt it
>You die on the boss, you have to do the fights again

timed underwater escort stealth missions.

Everytime you do something that doesnt need a cutscene now has a cutscene. Such as opening a door, equipping an item, unlocking something, blinking, ect

>fighting a 7 foot tall black man in a skin-tight catsuit and yarmulke who attacks by throwing ninja stars of David at you and introduces himself by kool-aid manning through a wall shouting "shabbat shalom, niggas"
this game is supposed to be bad, user

The game takes up 1 TB due to being translated to over 200 languages no one speaks and unoptimized/redundant coding

>loading screens are 5+ minutes each
>can be done in like 10 seconds if you spend gems (each time)