Why did he bail Naruto out every time he was in trouble...

Rock Lee's weights were on and he didn't use any of the moves he used on Gaara in their fight. There wasn't any speed for him to copy.

>Interdimensional human aliens travel from planet to planet, seeding them with a plant that sucks out the life energy, then they return thousands of years later to harvest the world tree's fruit and eat it for U N G O D L Y P O W E R
>Earth got seeded, then alien woman ate the fruit and got supermagic powers
>She decided to rule over Earth, slept with some human guy, and had two sons
>When her sons turned out to inherit her powers, she went nuts with anger, believing they stole her power
>She turned into a giant ten-tailed monster and fought her sons
>Her sons used their magic to defeat their mother, then ripped out her soul and sealed her body in a giant enclosure of rock, creating the moon
>The elder brother then took his mom's soul and split it into nine separate parts, forming the infant tailed beasts
>He taught them that one day there'd be a guy who would treat all of them as equals, and to watch out for that guy
>Younger brother went to go live on the moon to watch over their mother's body
>Older brother decides to spread magic to the other people, teaching them that magic should be used for good and not evil
>The people decide to use it for war
>He has two sons, the older one who inherited his dad's immense magical power, the younger one who was a screwup and had to rely on his friends' pwoers
>Old sage guy then decides to entrust the future to them and wants to pick one who has the better ideal
>Older brother, with his cool powers and awesome ability, believed might makes right
>Younger brother, with his massive amount of friends and followers, believed friendship is magic
>Old sage guy chooses the younger son, believing it to be the path to peace, then dies
>This enrages his older son, who fights his younger brother for the right to rule the world
>Their fighting continued on in their descendants, who eventually come to an agreement
Eventually the villages are built. Naruto claims to be about ninjas, but it's actually about wizards.

Can one man job more than Kakashi?

I'm rewatching Naruto because why not.
Never watched Shippuden, does Orochimaru ever fucking die? I enjoy a slow burn but enough is enough, Sarutobi actually killing him would have been perfect thematically but that ship has sailed I guess

Orochimaru is Naruto's Joker. He has contractual immortality.

>does Orochimaru ever fucking die
yes sasuke kills him and then itiachi kills the Orochimaru living in the curse mark, he gets resurrected by kabuto but then is for some reason 'good' now

Only one man can job more than Kakashi - Sasuke, his student. It ties perfectly into the "passing the torch" and "each generation surpasses the previous one" themes

>but then is for some reason 'good' now
He's not good. If he had a chance, he would snitch Sasuke's body anytime.
Though I guess half of the cast, including MC, would do the same

>Younger brother went to go live on the moon to watch over their mother's body

The older guy was the sage of 6 paths right? Who's the younger guy?

Orochimaru literally just hangs out in the leaf village now