Who actually washes their hands after a piss anyway? If you didnt touch your dong then you aight

Who actually washes their hands after a piss anyway? If you didnt touch your dong then you aight.
Seinfeld just being an ASSHOLE

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Everything in the bathroom is coated in a fine mist of shit particles at all times. Just going in there means you are literally covered in shit.

Shut the lid on the toilet when you flush retard.

Why does he zip up his apron, though?

Yes lids create a perfect seal when closed. Kys tard

Public toilets don't have lids. Public restrooms are like typhoons of shit particles.

I bet you touch the handle as well you sick fuck
Honest to god if I could hold a piss in long enough all day to not go to a public toilet I would

There's a doorknob to exit. Even if he washed his hands he'll have piss and shit on them after he leaves. It's likely Poppy has a hand washing station in his kitchen.

>If you didnt touch your dong then you aight
so you take a piss without touching you dong? not sure if based

This the same nigga that pissed on his couch. Can't remember which came first.

The penis is literally the cleanest part of your body, it’s tucked away in your underwear or at least pants all day.

You should actually wash your hands BEFORE you take a piss to protect your little feller from all the germs and bacteria. And you shouldn’t need to wash your hands after unless you somehow pissed on them.

LMAO he didn't wash his hands HAHA

American "comedy"

Funny because Seinfeld would have had to use the same doorknob he used to get out so technically he touched that guys dick

/thread

>washing your hands before
my negro

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Based and Torrentepilled

piss is more antiseptic than the surface of your penis: it's literally been through your circulatory system for fuck's sake.

Also it’s an Italian restaurant so the kitchen is crawling in cockroaches anyway, a few human pubes should be the least of his worries.

>he doesn't wipe his dick after pissing

disgusting

so basically he held poppy's dick directly in his hand, cradled his balls and gave him a handjob is what you're saying

Poopy isnt italian

My penis is way more clean than my hand.

Only helps a little bit, shit particles still spread everywhere

>coated in a fine mist of shit particles
wrong.

He came out of the toilet stall implying he took a SHIT

He was doing the old tuck and scratch

Wanna jack off each other? No homo of course!

why would you eat at a restaurant if you were worried about stuff like that?

How the fuck do you piss without touching your dick

pull your pants down
your dick flops over the waistband
hands on waistband to adjust the trajectory of the piss
when finished shake your todger for any post piss drops
pull waistband down so your dick is back to its neutral position and then pull your strides back up
americans really are dumb as fuck

Your dick definitely leaks piss into your pants every day after you piss retard

>The penis is literally the cleanest part of your body
People should rub their exposed genitalia together as a greeting instead of shaking hands then imo.

ok but how am i supposed to do this without cooming

listen junior
you dont know how to piss

>when finished shake your todger for any post piss drops
and get piss all over yourself. well done

look here jack, i'm a dog faced piss soldier, and i can take a shit wherever i please

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This. This is why I have taught my body to absorb all the nutrients in my food so I don't have to poop anymore

>If you didn't touch your dong then you aight.
and you manage that how?
by having a microdick?
are youa psyker? do you wobble your dick to prevent drippage with your mind alone?
you realize most people do come into contact with their genitals right?

Why don't American wash their hands? Seen it in many movies, so I guess it represents something their society as a whole tends to do
Are Americans really that lazy?

How did he know he wasn’t going into the kitchen to wash them since Jerry was using the sink?

Touching a public restroom faucet and then using one of those god forsaken blow dryers is incredibly more filthy than simply touching your own cock. We don’t have smegma infested yam bags like you browno.

americans ladies and gentlemen..
cant go to the toilet without getting themselves covered in piss

(((We))) don’t have smegma infested yam bags*

You’re assuming his dick has the length to flop

tell me your technique for todger shaking without getting any on yourself

If you can piss hands free, I think you’re the lengthlet here

I suppose it only works with more than 4 inches to work with.I don't know what to tell you, bud. this stuff should come innately

YO LIL DONNY

this. how the fuck do you take a piss without touching your dick?
you'd have to drop your pants all the way, then get a boner. or maybe drop your pants and then aim by awkwardly lifting your dick with your underwear?

All restaurant bathrooms have a sign that says something like "Employees must wash hands." It's a legal thing, not just a grossness thing.
Poppy came out of the stall, which makes me think he just shat. You wanna wash your hands after that.

>dicklets unknowingly outting themselves by confirming that their dick head faces forward when flaccid

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he didn't piss he shid tho

What if you’re a grower? I’ve seen cocks that look tiny flaccid but get huge when hard.

That's what happens in movies when mc glances at girl in a bar and it cuts to them fucking.

>take your dick out
>piss against urinal
>little drops of piss that you can barely see bounce off the urinal back to your benis and legs
yeah very clean user

i bet you have

>piss isn’t clean

How much of a OCD germaphobe are you? You realise just going outside will cover your in more and worse than your own bathroom?

Do you wash your legs in the public sink after you piss user? Or are you a hypocrite

Piss is all the garbage and things that your body couldnt absorb. Its literal waste.

>using public toilets

Doesn't it make sense to watch your hands before you have a piss?

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I wish I could do this, but I don't have the metabolism for it. Sometimes when I go poop I'll pick it back up with chopsticks and reinsert it back into my body in case I missed out on any nutrients.

Just because I say that a dick isnt clean doesn't mean I am a hypocrite you fucking retard.

Yas Forums loves eating eclairs out of the trash with piss covered hands

yes i watch them for at least a couple of minutes to make sure they dont do anything untoward