/brit/

I fucking hate you shut up

arse?

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catching up on games lads
hardly played anything from 2015-2019
gonna try to do the so called 'ack on the 3ds

Gypsies are scum though

exes best mate somehow managed to have sex with more than 10 lads (could be significantly more I just know it was at least double digits, may have been over 20) in freshers week
they went to different unis so my ex didn't know all the details but they were close enough that she knew it was a lot
genuinely baffling, she was a 6/10 at best, yet was shagging multiple guys a day

the thing that fucked me up was that it's the kind of stuff you only hear about when you happen to be close enough to a girl that's privy to this information, otherwise you could know the girl, be mates with her, even want to date her without knowing a thing

she also pegged some lad (not during freshers)

True desu

Le Girl... and Le gamer too? Whoa mama! Hummina hummina hummina bazooooooooing! eyes pop out AROOOOOOOOGA! jaw drops tongue rolls out WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF tongue bursts out of the outh uncontrollably leaking face and everything in reach WURBLWUBRLBWURblrwurblwurlbrwubrlwburlwbruwrlblwublr ,tiny cupid shoots an arrow through heart Ahhhhhhhhhhh me lady... heart in the shape of a heart starts beating so hard you can see it through shirt ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum milk truck crashes into a bakery store in the background spiling white liquid and dough on the streets BABY WANTS TO FUCK inhales from the gas tank honka honka honka honka masturabtes furiously ohhhh my gooooodd~

Tried to curl 15kg.
It didn't go well.
Why am I so weak?

ponder the poots circulating in the air

me

Reminder stars are holes in the firmament, not distant suns

I've got about 40g of p.c and I'm considering tripping for the first time. Can you tell me what it was like in nature?

reminder that you guys would hate mexicans too if they started moving to bongistan

pathetic little virgin

>>animal crossing
>>Mario Odyssey
>>smash brothers
>>breath of the wild
>>splatoon 2

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like she would need lube for that cavern beneath her legs

oh my days stop typing

couldn't even make friends if I tried

Deano is desperate to go back to work

don't recall asking

Why are you bothered for in the first place?

Poked a hole in your mum's firmament

are you okay lad

SCHWING
SCHWING

True. I don't get why everyone hates them. Never interacted with one.

forgot to get butter in the shop earlier even though I literally had it scribbled on my hand

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im learning british accent, just dont proununce t am i right bruvs

piss off

wait a second. are you telling me girls have sex with guys? baffling

I can assure you you have.

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>kind lady
Mentally ill poofters

i'm your friend mate

sucking a stick insect

Why do you hate Mexicans?
They have the same religion and seem a rather submissive meak people.

Yeah but like, real ones where we give a shit if the other lives or dies.

aaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAHHHhHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOO A SAINBURYS WORKER IM GOING INSAAAAAAAAAAANE AAAAAHHH

>inernet
do yanks really

do you lads pay for your games

nubs is actually female
and a sociopath with a victim complex

reckon you could mate

of course not

...

is she fit?

Why the fuck you holding on to 40 grams of PC when you’ve never tripped before lmfao? Yeah it’s a good beginner shroom, find a nice outdoors location (if you can during lockdown) and take it, bring a friend if it makes you feel more secure. I can’t really give you any better advice than you would find on YouTube or Reddit.

For me anyway yesterday’s trip was totally underwhelming, no crazy introspective thoughts and barely any visuals, I just stared over the cliff for ages and felt a ‘oneness’ with my surroundings, literally for hours.

>sociopath with a victim complex
isn't that every female ever?

makes sense why they've been posting in /britfeel/ then
don't need that drama here simple as

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Hard time believing that

Growing my nails since lockdown progress

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to your average Yas Forums dweller, yes

they smell bad and don't speak english

Where? Can't even go socialise now with the lockdown and not even people on r9k seem to want to talk on discord. Tinder girls don't respond to my first message when we match even though I try to send interesting things related to their profiles.

just bruv simply be'ah

piss off mate

Depends on the region

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just did a 1.5 mile run in 09:39

just heard mum use the word 'incel'

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i like nintendo dont care wot any1 sez m8

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could be your gf lad - also just appalling behaviour worthy of shame

not just that she had sex, but that she had sex with an outrageous amount of guys, her overall number is easily over 100, and more than 10 of those were in a 7 day span

i also forgot to mention that she complains that she can't find a guy that wants to date her

have had a crackling sound in my when I move my head since the last time I showered about a week or so ago
think there might be water stuck in there

so like a regular American then

what system/console

You said you wanted friends right? Tinder's not where you go to find mates. Need to find yourself some lads mate, plenty of ways to do that but the real life methods are kind of hampered at the moment
also don't make mates on r9k lad does not sound good

aye lad you could pass the army physical with that

Does she know you're a virgin lad?

I don't play games because I'm not a manchild

sucking a shite

>since the last time I showered about a week or so ago

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in my ear*

why do yanks call the bog the “turlet” ?

Wouldn’t be my gf because I wouldn’t associate myself with what I’d class as dirt.

you're awfully nosy aren't you

haha
reminds me of when some of my mates asked me if I was an incel because I've been single for a several years
very much a "I've been found out" moment but not really

All women are sluts, some just have no shame about it

youtube.com/watch?v=NS5bxk89gQg

I want to join a boxing or martial arts club but they're expensive and uni/work always change my schedule up. I was in a martial arts club for a while but didn't click with anyone socially, and the actual training was a joke so I quit.

font

I've never heard someone call it that

i'm not a virgin but even as i type i know it's pointless attempting to deny this allegations

already have
varies tho per esempio paras have to get 09:30 and marines have to do 2 in succession, both on an incline, get under 12:30 for the first and under 10:00 for the second

lol she's an upper middle class girl doing a stem degree

reminder female friends see you as women

ive shagged over 100 birds. most of my friends have too, except that one freak who stayed with the same girl since uni. it really is not that much

enjoy your no immunity

The audacity of these foul creatures

would you date a girl that had?

all yanks say it
“am goen fur a dooky on the turlet”

nah m8

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yes and?
all women are whores
all women who go to uni are double whores
all women who go to uni to study STEM are triple whores

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What's the issue here? Would you not shag 20 girls during freshers if the opportunities presented themselves?

youtu.be/xqKPe9w5bUs

can't think of anything that rhymes with bigger except trigger

haha lads ready for this one

mikey is a pikey cunt

Always get told by women that I'm marriage material
Just want to shag and smack some slag about in the sack

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What difference does that make? If you’re out whoring yourself around you’re a whore. Which class you belong to doesn’t even come into it. A girl like that you shag her and that’s it. Feel sorry for the poor fool that will settle down with that yoke

don't recall replying to you
was just letting ar' mikey know that you wouldn't know she was dirt from the surface

shower every day without fail and quite often twice a day
even pre-corona virus, wash my hands minimum 20-30 times a day (unironically)

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mate they all had. even the ones who said they didn't shag that much. they did. it's just the way it is

I think I remember the original thread of this pasta, with the Turkish Ameriboo instead?

the lads at uni used to call me the Shagatronic, such was my potency in shagging birds

shagged well over a 100 bird myself just in the first 2 years at uni then I turned down the shag-dial a bit, must've only shagged 75 in my final year

digger
jigger
rigger
bigger

COOOOOOOOR

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lol enjoy marrying a girl like her and convincing yourself it's okay

all women are dirt

Swear naked women on the internet were just better looking back in the day

Nice job avoiding the question

/brit/ is a virgin general

lot of incel vibes in this thread

I'm composing a list of nationalities that are NOT JFs and this is what I've come up with so far: Australia, Canada, USA, New Zealand
Any others?
Don't you dare say Ireland.

the only thing you're immune from is girls

that's the modern dichotomy
some lads shag, and some lads settle
some do both but they're getting rarer

Liverpool, home...

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/brit/ is an incel general

I want to smell Emma Watson’s bodily smells.

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nah i wouldn't lad

>that one cunt who paints his house grey
what's that about?

um mate didn't you read the post, I'm the Shagatronic

I have sex

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hey
gib big booty slag, please

Don't watch anime? You're not welcome on /brit/.
Don't play videogames? You're not welcome on /brit/.
Have had sex? You're not welcome on /brit/.

>average looks
>average body
>average dick
>average intelligence
>uninteresting personality

I don’t have anything to offer in a relationship

Nice job lying

now thats a corrrrr

STRUCK ME LIKE A CHOOORD
I'M AN UGLY BOOOY

Simple fact of the matter is women and men are not equal and have never been equal. That’s what it comes down to. That’s it.

never shagged in my 28 years
never even seen a minge live

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Somehow have a GF but know deep down that I would not be able to get another one if she left me.

...

incel losers who have never had a girlfriend and spend all day playing videogames in their parents house

See thats interesting because I've never been told that, am not particularly good at the whole long term relationship thing (would like to be, I do try) but hookups have never been hard to come by for me.

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YOU DONT WANT A GIRL WHOS HAD A BUKKAKE GANGBANG FOR HER 19th BIRTHDAY WHAT ARE YOU AN INCEL

mobile.twitter.com/xiao_tao_cos/status/1251856510319095808

haha how does he reach the brakes

they are grim up close, you're not missing out

not your safe space

better lick her arse then lad

she will leave you soon

mobile.twitter.com/officialmcafee/status/1234296325224718338?lang=en
mobile.twitter.com/officialmcafee/status/1234296325224718338?lang=en
Lmfffffoaaaa

and how many stds do you have?

actually true, the irony
that doesnt change the fact that gypsies are not subhuman scum

Always feel for the dads in these situations.

bit strange for her brother to transition and then copy her appearance

Simple fact of the matter is pikeys and humans are not equal and have never been equal. That’s what it comes down to. That’s it.

struggling to parse this image

This is beyond based

based

I've never actually had sex lad I won't lie to you

why do so many mechanical keyboards have lighting on them ffs

would literallly eat her shit

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if only you knew how bad things really were

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dangerously based

Want ladyboy gf/bf

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love john mcafee, me

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>wanting a virgin? Pffft no thanks I want my woman with a bit of experience

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not actually strange at all if you understand trannies

it's not that they're women born in men's bodies, it's that they're men who desperately want to be women (usually for sexual reasons)

>*moves 8 miles away and gets called a wool endlessly*
ah yes no idea why people hate us so much

haha why is he so mental

Everything there aside from dick you can certainly improve.

she wants a gamer with a light up keyboard

What do you call the top of the bread? I call it the topper. I also do NOT eat that shit.

So you can see the keys in the dark.