Buy a girl a drink?

Jägermeister

How? If you can make it work it's a good source of emergency nutrition.
Draft beer.

I have a bunch of frozen meat that has been there for 8 years. I'm too afraid to look at it

You afraid its gonna eat you?

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Well it did fall from the sky...

I'm afraid of losing my freaking mind by looking at it

As far as references go, I'm torn between "Livin' in the Fridge" and "Toys in the Attic".

ID.

Onion-chan’s bodily fluids

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