I'd like to dedicate some time to talking about what motivates you. When you know you have to get something done and you only have yourself to hold yourself accountable, what is the thought or source that makes you to follow through?
Perhaps it's a recreational activity. Something you aren't required to do but that you commit to anyways (exercise, practicing an instrument, etc). What makes some people reach for the doritos and xbox controlller while others follow through on their commitment? Indulge my curiosity, Yas Forums. What's your willpower constructed from?
Nothing because its fucking sad in here I tried but we dont have the same motivations I still havent found mine
Parker Butler
Could you elaborate a bit? Whom don't you have the same motivation as? Do you find yourself having spurts of motivation and then long periods where you fall short of your own expectations/goals?
Lucas Long
bump. Put your dicks down boys, it's time to dig into those brains and pull out some thought-food.
We dont have the same motivation Didnt have spurts Just saying we dont have the same things that would motivatie us
True
Adrian Reyes
Personally I either vibe with a task or I don't. If I'm enjoying what I'm doing in my downtime and its "productive" then I keep the wave going. I was raised doing things like exercise, art and baking during school holidays, so I got used to doing things like that as I got older. Of course I enjoy browsing the web and playing vidya, but I'll find other things to do for fun that are "productive" from time to time.
As for motivation for tasks that have to be done, it's the consequences of not doing it that motivate me. I'd rather be doing something I enjoy than boring chores, but if I don't them I suffer consequences. These range from not paying bills equals getting services shut off to not cleaning up leads to a bad mindset and smelly environment.
Logan Carter
Discipline and habits. Motivation is long gone.
Ethan Fisher
Because I know everyone wants to see me fail (former-friends, family members, coworkers, etc), and I won't give them that satisfaction. The coworkers might laugh at me for having hobbies and interests that aren't exclusively sex, drinking, clubbing, drug use, or sports, but I laugh at them because they can't think beyond the next paycheck.
The family ostracized me for being an atheist (among other things), and can't wait to see me strung out on drugs somewhere, lying in a ditch, begging for help so they can swoop in with their sanctimonious religiosity, coupled with their, "I told you so, he's just like his no-good father." So, I don't give them that satisfaction, and I continue to avoid such vices while maintaining my sense of individualism and not being a total NPC like they want me to.
Just a start, but I feel like the thread's gonna die.
Interesting. I've been going through some bumps in the road recently. I play guitar. I really enjoy it and always have. But i don't have disciplined practice habits. More often than not, I find myself just picking it up here and there for fun. I'm interested in the ways that other people discipline themselves with non-required hobbies or tasks. Obviously paying bills and cleaning are necessary and I don't find them difficult because i want my services and i want a clean room. It's non-essential activities that I find myself struggling to control.
Connor Myers
To continue.
I was a fat kid/teen, and everyone gave me shit for it. Then, by about age 25, my health had become so bad, that my body could no longer allow me to simply ignore it, and so I took control. I began exercising everyday, cutting out certain foods (like pic related, which was a 'snack' to me at those times), going on long-distance bike rides, and doing cardio when it was too cold or wet outside. This was back in 2015. Now, I'm very skinny; skinny enough to wear skinny jeans and it not be awkward. I look around at everyone else eating like absolute shit STILL, never exercising, and wonder how or why they are able to still function. Fat fucks EVERYWHERE, but I still exercise everyday and try not to body-shame them.
And then, there are the former-friends. Most of them, we I learned we were only 'friends' because I had to see them 4-5 times a week (university as well as high school), but soon after I finished university in 2016, a lot of the 'friends' I made in university really started to show their true colors/tell me how they really felt, and we forcibly went our separate ways. A couple of them called me names and were SO fucking disrespectful, basically saying I'll never amount to anything even though I literally held some of their hands in our classes. To think that I have to play second banana to those FUCKS, and be made to feel inferior to them just because they're from more 'affluent' backgrounds and have had nearly everything handed to them their whole privileged lives...it's what compels me to continue reading and studying even though I don't have to. I've taken up Latin recently, though I'm still primarily focused on Japanese.
OP here, thank you for your time. I really like that you push hard in order to prove that you won't become a shadow of your father. Good for you!. I'd like to ask you, and everyone who's kind enough to participate in this thread, whether you indulge in any drugs? I smoke weed. It's a habit i developed in high school and it's been a part of my life since. Sometimes it's tempting to blame my lack of motivation or sense of urgency on the pot. But I feel like it's deeper. Thoughts? Any other pot heads who feel as if they've fallen into these same habits?
Hunter Gray
the fact that i even followed through on making this comment is frankly miraculous
Dominic Parker
your priorities are fucked up
Gavin Nguyen
No drugs here, but I've recently started occasionally drinking Japanese beer. It has to be Japanese...mainly because I'm also a lifelong weeb, but I'm more of an 'ascended weeb,' because I genuinely care about Japan outside of just popular culture, anime, and whatever's "in" right now.
Not to overwhelm you with responses, but i'm really enjoying your story and it gives me hope. I'm fat right now and I'm 23. I've lost weight here and there but never kept it off. Realistically it'd take me a few months to drop what I need to be a normal weight, but food has acted as a sort of emotional crutch to me. Something that i feel like i have to replace if i stop. Glad to hear you overcame that. I really hope to one day have the self-discipline you acquired at 25
Christian Jenkins
I feel you user. I tend to find the 10 minute rule works well for hobbies you need to stick at. That being, try it for ten minutes and if you're not vibing, do something else.
We feel a lot of pressure in today's society to be productive 100% of the time and if we're not making shit then we're worthless. That's just capitalist propaganda and its bullshit. You're here to enjoy life - assuming you work full time that's at least 37 hours of you week gone, more for commute time. Then factor out another 56 hours for sleep (assuming 8*7).
Thats 75 hours, not counting commuting, washing, eating and necessary chores. And the time you spend with others socialising, which is important as hell for your mental health. You're probably left with a mere 4-5 hours a day to yourself, if that.
Don't be discouraged if you don't feel like punishing yourself to improve on some days. Yes it's important to have discipline to improve on longer timescales (say learn a song a month) but sitting down for the day should be time for you to feel good and recharge. If guitar is helping you do that then awesome - but if not do something else you vibe with.
It certainly wasn't overnight for me, and my circumstances at the time did help (living on-campus, so having time outside of my internship to go on long bike rides, since 'friends' never invited me for anything). Just try eating on a caloric deficit, exercise regularly, and see food and drink as either medicine or poison. I now see soda as liquid candy, and that's enough for me to avoid consuming it. >not to mention it can also be used as a rust-remover
Thanks user! I'm going to try implementing that 10 minute rule. It makes practicing seem easier to swallow. I know once I'm 10 minutes in i'll be warmed up and more likely to practice. Keep vibing user ;)
Jaxon Gray
>What's your willpower constructed from It isn't. It simply is.
Adrian Gray
Sorry, I don't really believe that. Everyone has something that gets them out of bed. It might not be a clear reason or it may be an amalgamation of reasons but i think everyone draws motivation from something.
>I don't really believe that My willpower isn't constructed out of anything. It isn't fed by anything. It feeds. It draws from nothing. It's drawn upon. I, draw upon it. I, will it. It is my will.
It was my will to wake up today. I had no reason to wake up when I did. I decided to wake up; what I want isn't static. My motivations for doing things do not influence my will to do. Motivation alone isn't a compelling enough force to make me do something. Nothing, except sheer physical manipulation, is a compelling enough force to make me do something. I have to agree to it. It has to be a willful decision to oblige. I run, because I want to. I eat, because I want to. I want, because I want to. Having reasons to accompany the act, doesn't change the fact that my willpower isn't a composite of things. It's a distinct thing.
It stands alone. And if you don't believe that, it's of no consequence to me.
Jaxson Sanders
Bump
Ryder Parker
I've had a hard time motivating myself since I was like 11yo or something. The reason I graduated is because otherwise I'd have a shitload of money to pay back to the government and I had to finish before the deadline. I pushed myself by cutting off FB for a while and went to the library or a cafe to sit down and get work done. At home I would get distracted all the time by "important stuff" like doing the dishes.. laundry.. snacks...... For sports it's the same thing, I really have to push myself because I hardly enjoy it. I tell my husband and a friend/colleague I'm going to the gym to put some pressure behind it, cause otherwise I know I won't go. I find it very hard to motivate myself but I feel a little bit proud afterwards
Andrew Walker
Idk, sounds pretty gay to me. I think you're getting bogged down on some of the terms. I don't think you need a reason to physically wake up in the morning. Obviously you'd open your eyes whether you were depressed or extremely motivated. I'm talking about your expectations about reality that feeds your will. you can say your will is some eternal force that just exists but that doesn't affect whether it's true or not. When you exercise, you expect something as a result and that is your motivation to do it. Just like you expect certain things when you get out of bed. So again, what is the source of your motivation? You aren't a robot.
Jaxon Lopez
I have to live with whatever the subject of the task is, so it would be at its best if I at least gave it an effort.
Nolan Nelson
When I was depressed it was so hard for me to get out of bed in the morning. I was always late for work and didn't care, I only got annoyed by my complaining coworkers. When the depression faded I forced myself to go to bed on decent times and in the morning I try to think of the few minutes before work I have for myself. I can drink a cup of coffee and chill a bit instead of rushing and listening to my colleagues complaining. The thought motivates me to be there on time.
Gavin Ward
You're doing great and I'm proud of you. Cool to see you don't need religion to have your life on the right track and btw you still don't need to prove anything to them. Just do it for yourself because you deserve it.
Eli Lopez
> I think you're getting bogged down on some of the terms The moment you start fudging the terms, is the moment your words are equally meaningless.
Motivation concerns desire and aversion, 2 sides of the same coin. Willpower, is the conscious act of forcing a choice between the multitude of motivations that could ever drive you. If all your motivations are to avoid things, your willpower forces a choice. Optimally, something that benefits you in the end. Something that needs to be done. Motivations will conflict. There is always conflict. Without a means of resolving that conflict, you will hesitate. You will not act. That, is what will bog you down. I have willpower in spades: when I said that I had no reason to wake up when I did, I did not say that I had no physical reason to wake up when I did.
There was genuinely no compelling reason, no distinct desire, to wake up. Especially, no physical reason. I was not in pain, there was no discomfort. I merely chose to get up. Up, I went. My expectations of reality don't feed my will. Nothing feeds my will, user. It's not external, you're not listening if that's your takeaway. My will isn't a literal force. It's not gravity. It's not kinetic energy. I'm going to say it, this is a categorical error. I don't feed the will. It's a force. I apply it. Nothing makes it, it's the thing with which to make. To do. It's a tool. I use it. It uses nothing.
No one said I was a robot. I don't understand why you think I'm a robot. I'm not a robot. When I exercise, I expect something, yes. And you know what? Expectations don't make me desire things. Expectations don't make me choose actions, in of themselves. I need to choose. I need to will a choice. I need the willpower to maintain that decision, and everything that comes of it, as a result. Expecting it to rain doesn't move my legs. I move my legs, maybe if I decide that I should walk faster to avoid the rain.
Julian Torres
Motivation doesn't compel me. I am self-determining, OP. That makes me less of a robot than you want to recognize. Want, because you don't want to consider the answers that I've providing to you. What do expectations have to do with getting out of bed? My mind is blank. I couldn't care less about the expectations. I get out of bed. It's done. I'm out of bed. Task, complete. My heart beats with purpose, my legs support my weight. The air is still.
>what is the source of your motivation >What's your willpower constructed from Perhaps now you'll see why terms are important, OP.
Leo Morales
I'm not sure you're open to being wrong. Have a good one, user!
Hunter Phillips
Also, you absolutely rely on expectations to get out of bed. Would you be so willing to get out of bed if you knew you were going to die in a car accident that day? No. You expect that something productive will happen or that you'll accomplish anything. You are a PUPPET of your expectations about reality.
