Feel for you user, same thing here. Went on from 5 yrs old to 10 yrs old. Counseling with a therapist you trust helps. Of course, I still visit Gramp's gravesite once a year to piss on his headstone. (I didn't care for the whole, write a letter to abuser and leave it grave side, because fuck him) Wish he was still alive, so I could put a bullet through his brain.