Hey Yas Forums! I've lost most hope and am planning on taking the easy way out...

Hey Yas Forums! I've lost most hope and am planning on taking the easy way out, so I'd like some suggestions on how to kill myself

Preferably quick

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Me too! I'm planning on hanging myself on the 30th atm but it'll take forever

Suicide is never easy or painless

It's always selfish and dumb

I’ve tried hanging myself twice, but the noose snapped both times due to my weight. Thinking of running a car in the garage next time.

Yeah, I'm taking the selfish and dumb route. I fully understand that doing this will hurt the people who actually do appreciate me but quite frankly I'm in such despair that I don't care.

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Marry a liberal jewish woman and she'll kill you slowly and painful a little bit every day which is what you deserve for wanting to kill yourself and not be useful in the fight against degeneracy.

Why though

It can be both easy and painless, it being dumb or not depends on the situation, there's isn't anything selfish about it because you aren't trying to hurt others

Because I'm a weak mental waste of oxygen who can't deal with change

its a pandemic maybe youll get lucky op

Can we be friends OP?
We don't need to talk or whatever but be user frens?

What's going on man, what are the changes?

Start a small motor in your garage and sit down. You'll get tired and go to sleep. You'll wake up in paradise user! Have fun!

killing yourself and burning in hell for the rest of eternity is one hell of a change.

That looks like my cat. I'm going to show it to her the next time she gets demanding.

Don't kys before just when the world is getting exciting ya silly bastard

imgur.com/72sejeL

To give context to how much of a waste of space I am and the stupid reason I want to end it all:

I'm 18, currently in the gap year I planned taking and living at father's house. I work at Papa John's part time and spend all my money on food, drugs, and other indulgences. On Thursday I was yelled at by my drunken father and accused of lying for not finishing college application months ago when I had sincerely thought it was done. At the end he included if he ever smelt weed he'd do something but didn't say.

I bought weed yesterday from a friend and he had told me after that he had corona. I believed him because I trust my friends. I had told father that I interacted with someone with corona and needed to self quarantine for two weeks and because I'm too honest for my own good, I admitted it was from buying weed.

I'm now going to get kicked out in two weeks and although I have people who could house me I don't care. I want it to all end.

>suicide is selfish
>you should be forced to live a lifetime of agony just so other people don't feel bad for awhile

There is no painless way. It will hurt a lot and take you a few minutes of agony before losing consciousness. Good luck.
Oh and also it's very easy to fuck up and end up mega paralized.

There are remedies for despair. There is no remedy for death. This is life is the only and last gift we all receive, why squander it?

Agony is never lifelong unless you're dying from a degenerative disease which causes you constant pain, and even then, you'll die soon anyway.

You're being dramatic, and people can be permanently scarred by suicide, so stop being such a selfish little prick.

So you screwed up, and instead of acting like an adult and dealing with the bad hand YOU DEALT YOURSELF, you're going to act like a jewish/satanically influenced woman and commit an abortion... of yourself.
FFS just start working to fix your problem. Some of us has had people try to kill them and torture them and crap. Some kids have murderous parents. You simply screwed up. Unscrew yourself. It's your responsibility to actuate your life. Don't be a girl about this.

>I have people who could house me
Dude chill with friends it's a lot better than you think you have a job so just give them a bit of cash and help around the house.
You've got it better than you think just don't be a bum.

Checked

>you're going to act like a jewish/satanically influenced woman and commit an abortion

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Honest advice for you, user. Burn that shit down. Smoke yourself silly.
If you still wanna end it after that, ask your buddy to connect you to some fent and od with a nice clean needle. Set an email to send on 1-day delay to your city coroner so you don't make a mess for the ems workers who have to pick up your remains.
Gg see you on the other side

You wanna talk on discord or something? I'm in a somewhat similar boat as you

If you hurt that cat in the process of killing yourself, I will resurrect you, skin you alive and feed you to the pigs.

He's technically aborting his future.

I personally suffer scars over 70% of my body and have been in literal constant pain since I was like 15. The idea that suicide is inherently selfish is stupid as fuck. Sure sometimes it is (and honestly after reading OP is being selfish by taking his life because of one person who doesn't give a shit about him instead of letting people who care help him) but I believe there are cases in which it is a reasonable conclusion. Death isn't bad, it is the only true neutral. People will get over it, and if the death of one person is so tragic then their life was also probably just as bad. Few people living good lives are scared by such things.

This

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>if the death of one person is so tragic then their life was also probably just as bad
first off, that couldn't be further from the truth, secondly, yes; death is bad. It's literally the absence of anything, and while that means the pain stops it also means the potential for anything good is gone, which far outweighs any pain and suffering that's not on an Auschwitz, end stage MS, total paralysis all alone on a ventilator suffering.

Can I ask for some honest advice then?
How do you put your plans in motion and make ideas come true? It's such a painful question for me because my mother was the only one who taught me that and I haven't lived with her in over 10 years while all my father teaches is to do things myself without helping me. Because of that I try things myself then fuck it up and don't know how I fucked up until it's irrelevant.

Plus, the feeling of despair surrounding this mainly comes from thinking that everything I've said is a lie because of how my father feels about it.

If you want to my discord is Falvie#0020

I know all that sweet talk wont help you guys so here you go: When you die, you will have 2 options: Eternally leave this earth by avoiding the white light, and avoiding being reincarnated into another hell, or 2: Go into the white light and get memory wiped and hopefully the portals RNG gave you a good body and you live good this time. Or, what I'm doing, and what stopped me from being suicidal: Number 3. This will most likely be the last life I intend on living on this earth, so I'm going to live it out as happy as I can. This means: No marrying, no being stupid and doing drugs, etc until I get a house for myself (maybe a cheap one in the 100,000 to 200,000 range), and when I finally pay that off, save up money in a 401k, retire at 35 - 40, and travel around the world or just do stupid fun shit with friends.

Now, if that didnt convince you heres the final philosophy: Think of how much worse your life can be, think about it for a bit, and chillax. Now, your choice to do this, but go buy a gun and 2 bullets along with it.(1 for self defence and the other for ending it if it truly is game over for you). Now, go live out your life and bring the pistol around with you, and live out life as hard and good as you can. If this fails, you will always have the option to end it at anytime, anywhere, so why end it now? Why not just continue that extra meter or 2? There might be something waiting for you if you just push yourself off your ass and get to working like you've never done before. And well, if nothing works out and you end up in a ditch, this was what that pistol was for. You attempted to reach your goals but now your stuck in a ditch with literally no home, no clothes, nothing. Barely any homeless men recover from becoming homeless, so once you've hit the most bottom area possible, end it.

Again: Why end it now when you can theoretically end it anytime, anywhere. Live life out if its ur last shot. GL

Ask eddie bravo to snap your neck

Just for this? What kind of a pussy are you?

I've also been dealing with both the cycle of depression and being very evidently bipolar with other unforeseen issues. Just because it ain't shit to you doesn't mean it ain't shit to someone else, but yes I do agree, it's just because of that shit.

/thread

Don't be a pussy OP, commit seppuku at your local walmart especially if you live in Florida for them sweet headlines. That or just radically change your life in a way that forces you to move away from things keeping you down and a sad sorry shit. Move to Libya and join a militia that's fighting ISIS or join the United Liberation Movement for West Papua and rage guerrilla warfare against Indonesia in the jungle if you still want to die then do it as a suicide bomber.

But it can be bad ass.

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Go into construction if you truly cant do anything else. Save for trade school and take up some software engineering or whatnot engineering course. Buy a computer and rent a small apartment with the money from the contruction job, and build it up. Success is living peacefully and happily, not being madly rich and all that.

I take back about what I said** Its actually nearly fucking impossible to hit rock bottom, so yeah, just like in the response stated above this one, literally just do that. If you are really just sad and sick of it, then turn the game off with that off button of yours (gun). But if you, like me, are truly passionate about living life freely and happily, you will only shut off the console if you somehow end up in the middle of central Asia, with no knowledge of how to speak any Asian languages, and didnt graduate high school, and you are now forced to graduate high school in Asia.

Thats the only time its truly worth ending it: If you truly have nowhere to go, if you truly cannot do anything. (But fuck, even using the Asia example theres STILL SHIT YOU CAN DO TO DIG YOURSELF OUT OF THE HOLE). We are men, we are smart, dont let the depression cover your intelligence. You are related to Diogenese, the man in a literaly shithole who lived one of the best lives he wanted, Julius Ceaser, etc. We are men. It doesnt matter race or ethnicity. You have built the fucking world up in past society's, its almost impossible for us to truly, and I mean truly fall.

I wish you could walk into a building and get yourself killed. It's bothers me people are denied a graceful exit.
If you want to die fast find a tall building at least 11 stories and jump off it.

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My nigga, ur 18, I'm 18, I don't like college, put half your checks in savings. Chill at a friends house.

Sorry, still a bit of a newfag, came to Yas Forums like mid December, but I take it these means I should make this a thread?

Thanks anons. You successfully convinced me tonight to keep on trudging. I know these thoughts will persist but I must push through them. I'm going to follow the advice of and smoke my brains out one last time. Try to get sober off that shit then try to fix my mistakes and keep on living. I'll keep that second bullet handy. Hopefully I'll use it to defending someone else one day instead of to end it.

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This The free market demands death booths then we should be allowed to build them on every street in America if not for our Commie left wingers and our Moralfag right wingers we'd have them right now.

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What's with the stupid double standard between good and bad stuff. When it comes to bad stuff it's all "current bad stuff" but good stuff is "nothing good will ever happen again". If I'm fucking 30 and have had a total of a weeks worth of good in my life compared to decades of bad then it's safe to fucking say suicide will stop more bad than good because sure the potential for good ends but so does the potential for bad. Is it really selfish to give up another week of happy and make a few other people feel bad to get rid and another couple decades of bad?

get naked at a spacious public place and cut your balls and dick off with a hunting knife, run at law enforcement full blast screaming and shouting while holding your dick and balls like a gun -- if you don't get shot proceed to run until blood loss kills you which won't take long

No that means that's the end of the thread, as in the best response

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Boil yourself in a pot of water.

bruh, the cat pics in this thread are top notch.
I don't really give a fuck if this guy is gonna kill himself, can this be a cat pic thread now?

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I didn't say it was nothing. I said it was nothing to get yourself killed. Grow up, and wait until you're 25. If you think you should still kys at this moment, then do it.

I feel honored

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This is correct. VERY easy to pull off.

I'll keep that in mind, user.

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My dad died after deciding to stop dialysis, and it was totally accepted by medical staff, and I'm sitting here like... so... you think it's totally okay for him to waste away in a slow, horrible death that took 3 weeks, but won't allow him euthanasia. How stupid is that? Please take your decision seriously, but if it's the only way you feel you can stop your suffering, I can't blame you. Yet, I still won't help you because I wouldn't feel good about it, considering I don't really know your medical/mental history

I guess you forgot that shotguns exist lol.

Dont be a cuck and get your life under Control! Killing urself is the most cuck thing u can do

Knowing you thought my cat pics were top notch definitely makes me not want to end it so thanks user

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Helium inhalation

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If you are gonna do it, might as well take out a few assholes with you. Maybe start with Rand Paul...

You sound like a whiny little bitch

this shit never looks real to me, like I feel like the cat is shopped into the car

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