Did /b stock up on toilet paper?

Took 4 rolls from my job before we closed.

I'm good.

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I prepped last month you dumb shits.
>just the flu bro

nice shoop

No. I had a normal amount, like normal people. I'm down to my last roll and all the shelves have been totally empty for the last 10 days now. WTF is wrong with people??? I need to wipe my ass too you twats. Must be some selfish fuckers somewhere sitting on fucking piles and piles of the stuff. Cunts the lot of them. How much fucking TP do you need for a 2-3 week isolation FFS?

Don't know what to tell you. I always buy in bulk, saw this coming a month ago and got a 24 pack back then. Called being "situationally aware".

I usually have a few packs stocked up. I run the stock down, then top up. I get paid monthly so I buy enough to last me the month. 15th of the month is my payday, so I couldn't go shopping until Friday last week (paid on 13th as 15th was Sunday). By that point the shelves were already empty.

Selfish. Fucks.

So what's a month from today going to look like?

Considering a roll lasts me a couple weeks, and that I have 30 rolls, plus another big pack I got for my parents in case they needed it...lemme do a count. Between them and me with what they already have at their place... there's over 70 rolls for 3 people. We'll be fine.

Planning ahead used to be laughed at. Oh well.

>mfw all our stores are refusing any and all refund requests because the fucking retarded hoarders living paycheck to paycheck ended up being laid off when their minimum wage restaurant was ordered to stay closed and they can't make their car payments or pay rent with $500 of toilet paper

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The worst part is they will probably make the same mistake next time there is a mass panic

panic hoarders need to rounded up and buried alive

IM NETWORKING WITH GRETA!

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That's not what I asked.
I dont care about your toilet paper stockpile.
I asked what the global situation will be in a month since you're a fortune teller. Tell away.

Please tell me this is true. Post link to a sob story or a Facebook posts or something. I'm seeing layoffs but hadn't heard about this refund issue yet. Fucking lulz

I literally only need 2 rolls.

You will be the savior of human race once humanity falls into chaos

I sneezed on one of those, but I'm not going to tell you which one

Stages of TP Stupidity
1) Shock
>People are buying lots of toilet paper? That doesn't make sense
2) Denial
>There is no way I'll run short. I can buy TP anytime I want
3) Bargaining
>What if I just go to more stores, or ask if they have more in back?
4) Depression
>I will literally die if I don't get toilet paper and now there's no toilet paper. FML
5) Acceptance
>I am using my hands in the shower to clean shit off my ass like a fucking animal

My nigger. I love that shit. You can feel the shit just slide out cleanly and it's fucking awesome.

not that guy but it's true. pic related

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The media told them to buy toilet paper so they did.

>I am using my hands in the shower to clean shit off my ass like a fucking animal
Honestly, it is the superior method

I'm not a psychic. I saw people were buying up TP and I simply bought my big pack a little early. That's what situational awareness is. Looking around and reacting appropriately.

Civilized people avoid scraping shit off their ass with bare hands and a shower head, you troglodyte

Fucking kek, made my day Yas Forumsro

If you use soap you are essentialy washing your hands at the same time, how is it not the cleaner method?

You are from India. This is clear. Regardless, this is a moot point. I have plenty of toilet paper. Enjoy cleaning literal shit out from under your fingernails, Pajeet.

no because im not a dumb cunt

what is a bidet, if your in iso at home there's no need. You can easy get paper but you have to wrangle with the corona hoards when they restock in the morning

No.
I'd rather use my socks than fall this low.

Agreed +1 for socks.

Go onto Amazon. Right now. See what bidets are available and at what cost. I'll wait. I paid about 50 cents a roll, one month ago.

Simulation theory is real. Those are NPC's

I mean I have a removable shower head, anyway their effectively just a hose with a tap, you can rig that at any hardware store if your not a retard

I use napkins mostly.

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Bought commercial TP online last week @ 50c/roll (equivalent to consumer rolls). All out of stock next day. I'm a legend.

OK, now see how long it will take to get one shipped to you. Again, I'll wait.

Also, that last one is literally an anal douche bottle. Your search history must be a travesty.

No. It's ridiculous. I mean, I understand stocking up on food and alike, but toiler paper? Nah.

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For me the price really isn't an issue
I'm just not some faggot who loves having their ass licked clean by a hose

>fingers ass w/ paper

I bet you fill your bidet with lube so your boyfriend can fuck you once you empty your bowels

hot

nigger has never clean wiped in his life, one step above dedicated wiping hand streetshitter stuff

im just gonna get ops mom to lick my asshole clean

Creating a bunch of fecal bacteria mist to float around your bathroom and house, sounds like a great idea during a pandemic!

FUCK YEAH! I started buying in early January, every trip to the store I bought one 24-pack. I don't know HOW people didn't see this coming honestly. What sort of super-safe-zone bubble world do people live in where no danger is real? I've got about 2 dozen of them now, more than enough to build a TP a bunker.

same with Kroger stores but its on ALL items (some meat/produce exchanges are still allowed)

Don't worry, i create plenty of that when i fart.

Be sure to light your farts on fire to sterilize them

KEK

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Imagine the smell.

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sold 4 12packs on ebay made $200 profit. Going in to get 6 packs tomorrow. Shits crazy. people are paying high on ebay. its sweet as fuck

It's cool, i usually fart into my hands and then smell it. waste not want not.

All of those people who bought years worth of this shit are going to feel really stupid when they try to get refunds on it in 6 months, and the manager tells them to go eat a bag of dicks

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sheep. i use a 6 pack per month on average. anyone who bought more than 10 rolls is a sheep doing sheep things.

shitty bait

>in 6 months
They are already trying to return it and are getting told to fuck off

Fuckin cancer

People often buy bulk in advance. That's why they sell items in bulk. This is not a difficult concept.

Oh nooooooo!!!!! How will I wipe my ass? youtube.com/watch?v=NnRcjDagBwQ

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>6 pack per month
Holy fuck... how much do you shit?
A roll lasts me at least 2+ weeks on it's own and I don't consider myself stingy with the paper.

mate you must be ass blasting to arosolise your feces, turn the pressure down it shouldn't be more disturbing than flushing. In terms of public heath it reduces hand fecal contact and most people arnt hand washing properly anyway not to mention contact with flushes and doors. If that was even a problem thats why we have bathrooms fans

>sheep. i use a 6 pack per month
You use sheep to wipe your ass? I've got to hand it to you, that's very resourceful. But TP is much easier to store than sheep.

The key is to just hold in your shits for a couple weeks. Thats the only way to be safe.

you crazy man, i am dragon kid, the wongfu sniper, dont piss me off

I'm really concerned about other people's shitting habits now. Do you guys just shit a lot, or do you just end wadding up a fuck load of tissue into some kind of big tissue glove and go fucking mental on your own arse?

Sheep are a renewable resource though.

I wipe until it hurts, if the paper isn't red, i'm not clean.

But sheep clean themselves, so you only need one sheep!

I have IBS-D. I shit anywhere between 5-10 times a day on an average day. All these cunts hoarding TP are literally ruining my life.

Sheep are like renewable tp
Just snip off a bit of wool and wipe with it, after a while it grows back free of charge

>mfw im not washing hands after shitting my entire life, except i get visible shitstains on my hand
>build up immunity
>territority is marked
>dare to rob me

you will suffocate due to no immune response available to whats gonna hit you m8

Yeah but you can have sex with sheep, you try fucking tp and you will get a paper cut on your dick.

>Fixed an issue that caused all NPC's to aggressively buy all toilet paper

Its true, grots got us beat

I do grocery delivery as a side job for beer money and now my real jobs gone for awhile so i do it full time now and im out every single day.
Literally people are just doing this because they saw on the news australia did it. This is pure fucking stupidity.

North american suppliers have all said there is not a supply crisis and that inventory on everything is fine. When i go go to the stores the shelves are empty and its a ghost town until the trucks show up every few days, then its rammed and everyone takes all the canned food and processed stuff and water and what have you, then its all dead again until the next restock.

Like everyone needs to chill, its this behaviour that actually is going to cause a supply problem.

Damn bro, that must suck. The hoarders around here take all of the baby formula and shit like that. Straight up selfish cunts. When all of this calms down, the hoarders need to be rounded up and beaten in the streets.

hoarding is just a coping mechanism, done to gain a sense of control. All this thats happening is revealing how psychologically weak most people are. Hoarding only makes sense prior to an impending ban on said hoarded goods - for example nicotine ejuices. Come May 20th, all vape products will be banned.

Took me about a week or more but I FINALLY got a pack. Yes, a SINGLE pack like a normal person.

Fuck you idiot's buying up everything like cunts.

Suck it

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Yep. I also use baby wipes as shitting that much every day, your asshole gets pretty raw and bleeds when you're wiping with TP that much. So I use a little TP, then finish with a baby wipe to sooth my asshole a little bit.

Not only can I not find TP, I can not find baby wipes wither :*(

m8 the hoarders are gon fucking die and their corona ridden tp redistributed to the healthy and immune