My girlfriend, who I've been with for more or less 4 years, in the past 6 months or so has been having sex with me less and less. It went from almost every day to 1-3 times a month and it doesn't seem to bother her at all. There's no intimacy in our relationship anymore and I'm really getting to the point where I'm about to say fuck it and cheat on her. I've had many talks with her before about how I need sex and intimacy in a relationship and she claims it's because birth control is making her "not feel like it", I am starting to not even try because I know the answer is gonna be a no.
I do not think she is cheating on me though, so I'm ruling out that possibility. She's very transparent and has always been honest with me, on top of the fact she has nearly no friends and social life anyway (to the point where she hates my friends) but that's besides the point.
What should I do? Just not have sex ever again except for special occasions? Or go and cheat on her? Or leave her? I don't wanna leave. I genuinely love her, and I know, the fact I'm considering having sex with another girl makes it seem like I don't love her THAT much and I would agree, but I promise that I do. I'm always helping her out financially and always doing things for her that she loves, and just try to make her life easier in general.
But she just won't fuck anymore. And I'm getting really annoyed.
Some beta shit I know but idk what to do and I need help from you guys. Thank you for reading all this
tl;Dr >gf won't fuck anymore and I'm about to cheat, convince me not to
If you're at that point end it, you dumb mother fuckers always forget the golden rule. It's super easy to fall in love. It's hard to stay in love
Ryder Green
Either end it or seek couples therapy if needed, if she doesn't have anything else to offer other than sex, then she's not worth having either
Caleb Bailey
Talk to her about maybe switching to the implant for birth control or hey I don't know wear a rubber so she can get off the pill. You need to understand sex drive is driven by hormones. Birth control is a hormone which in women can and will kill sex drive just like if your testosterone again hormone surges you're going to want to fuck like now. If your testosterone is low you'll be just like her zero interest in sex. These things can be worked out in 2020 or end what could be a good thing.
Jordan Jenkins
jesus christ, just fucking jerk off. you're really gonna throw your relationship away to gain sexual pleasure?
Eli Collins
I guess I'm just confused as to why the birth control is all of a sudden causing this issue when she's been on it for almost 3 years. Idk exactly how hormones are affected by that shot though so maybe you are right
Eli Baker
Yep. If there's ZERO intimacy in a relationship, you're basically just roommates at that point
Colton Smith
it's an easy thing to lie about, because it happens to some women. also she could just THINK it's the birth control, like how TF would she know.
Thomas Price
Give her an ultimatum. "I don't feel like it becuz birth control" is a bullshit answer. Make her tell you the real reason. Push for a real answer on if she's still attracted to you and if she still loves you.
My gf had something similar, and when I pushed her about it, she told me that it was because she had gained weight and didn't feel attractive anymore. (She DID NOT want to admit that to me, and that's why I'm saying push her on it.) I told her that I don't care and still want to stick it in her, and I won't stop wanting that. That made her feel better, and since then, we have sex whenever I want.
Bentley Campbell
Dude you clearly aren't happy and sometimes even though you love someone, you have to look out for yourself.
Adrian Cook
I'm gonna try that, I have before but I didn't really push it like you said. Thanks bro
Aaron Ramirez
What he said.
Jordan Young
>she could just THINK it's the birth control, like how TF would she know.
This. Women have no clue what makes their bodies fuck up, but a lot of times they act like they do.
Tyler Wood
shes cheating faggot. prolly sitting on a fat black cock as we speak
Easton Roberts
She's interested in a different person. You're her roomie/daddy now. She's banking her sexual interest/equity into the next one. You thinking about cheating is a last resort, but REALLY that's been pretty much the only thing on her mind lately... to the point where sex with YOU at this point is something she sees as cheating on her next relationship.
Or she might just be depressed and the lowered libido could be a side-effect, if THAT'S the case, well, she's a lost cause sexually, and you may want to make your own "next relationship" plans.
Caleb Edwards
She's right next to me asleep. I used to think she really could be cheating but I'm now pretty certain she's not. I think what other user said could really be the reason
Landon James
Good. And by "push her", I obviously don't mean hit her or anything like that. Just keep pushing past her attempts to lie and deflect her way out of it, until she gives you real answers. There's a good chance that she'll be crying by the end of it. That's not a bad thing. That's just how some women deal with confronting issues they've been trying to avoid for a long time.
Just clarifying myself in case some young idiot is also reading this.
Dylan Flores
So I should beat my gf into submission? Thanks, user. That's the help I needed.
Easton Nguyen
Okay, so this is a thing that happened to me in a prior relationship, and it did not end well for me. (I cheated, she found out, it all went down in flames) I might be projecting a little, but it sounds like your girlfriend's got some other stuff going on in her life that's affecting her mental health, and thus your sex life. Not having any friends and hating yours? That's not normal behavior; she's hurting, and if you aren't paying attention to that sort of thing, your relationship would be doomed even if the sex was perfect.
It's important to understand that this isn't necessarily your fault. People have emotional shifts for all kinds of reasons: stress, new traumas, or even just genetic predispositions. What is your job, however, is helping her get better. Talk to her, not about the sex (really, don't even bring it up!), but about your concern for her well-being overall. Gently suggest therapy, and show the love and empathy you have for this woman who's been such an important part of your life for so long.
That said, if she ignores your concerns for another month or so and continues to become more emotionally withdrawn, still don't cheat. Dump her and find someone who will actually like sex with you and being around your friends. If you keep fantasizing about cheating, it'll eventually happen, and then you'll hate yourself for it. Better to leave the relationship once it becomes unsalvageable and slut it up guilt-free
Isaiah White
You are right, user, and I'm glad to have an opinion from your point of view seeing our situations are so similar. I'll try those things
Sebastian Bailey
>I do not think she is cheating Lmao. U already know she's cheating
James Morris
Oh, fuck off with your bullshit 1950's-grade misogyny
Jordan Cook
Nah I'm certain she isn't, and I would think the exact same thing if I read this shit on here by someone else. But I promise I have no suspicion that she is cheating right now
Gabriel Moore
Birth control fucks with oxytocin, it's a brain chemical bitches have when they get fucked that promotes bonding. Make her stop taking it, nut hard in that puss hole, and make an honest woman out of her you literal fag.
Gavin King
>I'm now pretty certain she's not U aren't certain about shit
Keep your head deep up your ass. If she isn't cheating already , she's about to be. Your relationship is already over and she knows it
Austin Howard
I'm really white and you are a fucking retard
Matthew Morales
Whatever you say, nigger
Chase Turner
Been with the same girl for almost 8 years. Been married 4 years.
user, you're experiencing what every male experiences. I feel your pain.
1) Encourage her to switch her birth control. It did my relationship wonders. 2) She needs to understand that sex is a physical need for a guy. Not optional. We have to get our nut off or we go crazy / are in physical pain. 3) If you're still dating and this is the primary issue, reconsider being in a relationship if she is unwilling to budge on this topic. It's akin to you refusing to do anything romantic for her ever again.
Having been married 4 years now, I would encourage you to not get married. Marriage is horse shit and you're seeing why at this current moment. You're supporting her with little in return, where we men are little maintenance to begin with. That's why I'm a huge fan of the MGTOW movement. Women are fucking useless the way they are made today. Can't cook a decent meal, don't fuck, can't raise a kid without being thirsty for attention on social media. Fuck that. I'll rent a vagina for what I need it for.
Cameron Hernandez
why's she even taking birth control if she knows it affects her emotions poorly, I don't understand drugs, y'all niggas gotta stop taking them like candy.
Elijah Price
Why even be on birth control if she isn't having sex with o.p.??? I think we already know why
Adam Sanders
You should stop giving life advice. >Thank you
Dominic Nguyen
>She needs to understand that sex is a physical need for a guy. Not optional. We have to get our nut off or we go crazy / are in physical pain. please speak for yourself.
Eli Morales
Nah I think he hit the nail on the head actually
Thomas Campbell
Cuz all women are the same.... Sure thing kiddos
Colton Foster
well I was gonna ask that but he said they're having sex 1-3 times a month. you have to take birth control in advance so she needs to take it in case they do fuck. but still mind altering drugs are a no go when other options exist, use a condom or IUD, or tie some tubes.
Jose Moore
Found the beta's.
Stop white knighting you cunts. Women are not all they are cracked up to be.
Carson Fisher
I pity your wife, holy shit!
Grayson Morgan
You shouldn't. I provide her a very good standard of living. Unlike you that's still in your mothers spare bedroom.
Ryan Taylor
you should pity the fool
Cooper Jenkins
Birth control can genuine fuck with a woman’s libido. That was the case with mine, but she cared enough about me to fuck me even if she wasn’t really in the mood.
Your GF sounds self-centred, mate.
Jordan Thomas
Did she change brand? The can be a huge factor, but yeah, she may simply be using it as an excuse.
Parker Gray
Watch out user, there's a lot of beta cunts in this thread that will attack you for having that opinion. Be ye warned.
Nathaniel Murphy
I'd rather have a man that loves me, than a man that "provides a good quality of living"
Gavin Smith
Nope, always been the same
Luis Sanders
I do love her. That's why I haven't divorced her. But I'm not going to sit idly by and have a fucking dependent in my house. Neither should you.
If I have to provide around the house, work to keep it clean, do chores, etc, then I should expect the same from my PARTNER. That's the purpose of being a COUPLE. I am not to cater to you, you are not to cater to me. If you want to be my equal, be my equal. If not, there's lifestyles where the wife is subservient to the husband.
I'm sorry this doesn't fit your Disney Princess narrative, cupcake. But this is real life. I should be able to depend on my wife just as she depends on me.
Austin Hughes
Communication and effort required. As others have said before me, it's easy to fall in love, it requires work to remain so. But it's worth the effort. So bloody talk to her about your misgivings, perhaps that'll open up some important points? Open communication is paramount in a lasting relationship. Best of luck, user.
christ, sorry I bugged you. but your acting like all women are like that. OP never said she doesn't cook/clean/work. just that she didn't want to fuck much. we don't owe you sex, if you don't like that you can leave.
but if your girl is really just a useless person then you really SHOULD leave. sucks that you spent 8 years of your life with a dead weight, I hope you find someone better if your willing to let her go.
Dylan Johnson
I'm going to tell you something it took me a long time to learn. Longer than it should have for any man. You have to be upfront and say "This is a deal breaker." Even if it means losing her. Even if it means making it awkward for a while. There is no other way. You're not going to mind fuck her into craving your cock with some life hack bullshit. You just have to say it to her, and to anybody else you're in a relationship with. It's not easy, but you must, user.
That's why I said men are low maintenance. Decent meal, decent lay is about all we need. If we aren't getting those things, it's poisonous to a man. When we men say that, however, we are deemed sexist, misogynistic and overall berated as we don't "love our women." It doesn't make logical sense to bash a guy for wanting those things in life.
Hence why I told you to fuck off. You're right. Women don't owe men sex. Just like we don't owe you nice words, or flowers, or dates, or a standard of living. But guess what? If you want something, you have to give something. Otherwise you're a user piece of shit. That's the harsh reality.
If I don't get sex or a decent meal, I can sub that out. I don't have to entertain the opposite sex without expecting something in return.
Jeremiah Wright
Better to end it than grow to resent your partner. If you can't be honest what's the point?
Eli Rodriguez
yep, and he's right. different people have different tolerances and if the sex is to infrequent/frequent for him/her, then it should end. why prolong a bad relationship?
so you do want a useless women? except one that at least gives sex and food?
thankfully not all men care about only fucking and eating.
Aaron Brown
OP already said if he brings it up then the answer will be no.
Your sexism is showing. You're thinking because open communication MAY work with you in this situation that it will absolutely work with this female in OP's situation. It won't. There is no compromise here. There is no middle ground. There is no way in which you're right. If a man has a physical need and the woman is unwilling to give it, there is no "talk it out" where we agree that I don't need sex.
Surely you can see this femanon? You're not unintelligent.
Justin Cooper
You should’ve been cheating from the very beginning bro
Robert Torres
That's what a relationship is supposed to be. He is upfront and says "I need X to sustain this". She responds with "I can/can't do X". This works both ways. Whether it's him and sex, or her and money or intimacy or whatever they need. That's called compatibility. It's a two way street, bro.
Joseph King
When did I say I want a useless woman? You're searching for a mark in the "win" column. I said men are low maintenance and if we can't get bare necessities, then why bother?
It's a pretty basic concept. The more she is willing to bring into the relationship, the further we will go as a couple. Likewise, my job is to push her further along in her growth as a human as it is her job to push me.
Jesus, you can't be this thick.
Jack Long
what? a deal breaker is a deal breaker. it literally can't be two way. if you could budge then you have nothing to complain about anyway.
Wyatt Rogers
How-how did the boy know that it was horse cum specifically. This meme.
William Baker
>who I've been with for more or less 4 years tbh faggot, II've only read the first sentence of that shit post and I want to fucking kill you. so the come dump is now fucking tyrone because she's fucking bored of you. so what. kys
