I realized why I was so insecure and confused about my sexuality. Like many men I fell into the typical trap of porn which led to fapping to trannies all the way to wanting to be a tranny sucking cock and balls, but still wasn't attracted to men when I was around them. Naturally guys like me are called closet repressed homos in denial and whatnot, which is fair, but something didn't feel right, calling myself gay or even bi just didn't feel right, but I certainly wasn't straight. I agonized over this endlessly, but the turning point was when I realized that I didn't really want to have sex with men. I no longer cared if I was gay or not, I just knew having sex with men wasn't gonna happen regardless of what I was, that made me realize why I wasn't comfortable calling myself gay or bi, because I wasn't, at least not how those words are actually used. When someone identifies as bi or gay, they are expressing 3 things, 1. I probably like some form of gay porn (check) 2. I have an attraction towards men when I'm around them (no) 3. I have or will have sex with men (no). Basically, my problem was that only 1 of those things applied to me, so calling myself bi never felt right because it was only partially true, while the most important implications of the label were false.
Sorry for the wall of text but this was like a eureka moment for me, I see so many guys confused about their sexuality and I think this is precisely why. Don't get me wrong, by the textbook definition of the word we are still bisexual, but the way this word is actually used in communication does not fit guys like us, it implies things about us that aren't true, so we aren't comfortable with the label. If I tell anyone that I'm bisexual, that would automatically think I'm attracted to men around me, have had sex with men or will, which isn't true. So how do you deal with a conundrum like this?
all i read was >i'm a faggot and i have to go through mental gymnastics to justify it
Daniel Foster
TLDR >am fag Who cares eat ass and live for pleasure
Dylan Edwards
Exactly. You're bisexual OP. Just accept it and stop the ridiculous mental gymnastics. You'll feel better, and can drop the uncomfortableness caused by your silly fear of other people's reaction to your orientation. You can always clarify after that you only like feminine men.
>I realized why I was so insecure and confused about my sexuality. Like many men I fell into the typical trap of porn which led to fapping to trannies all the way to wanting to be a tranny sucking cock and balls, but still wasn't attracted to men when I was around them. Naturally guys like me are called closet repressed homos in denial and whatnot, which is fair, but something didn't feel right, calling myself gay or even bi just didn't feel right, but I certainly wasn't straight. I agonized over this endlessly, but the turning point was when I realized that I didn't really want to have sex with men. I no longer cared if I was gay or not, I just knew having sex with men wasn't gonna happen regardless of what I was, that made me realize why I wasn't comfortable calling myself gay or bi, because I wasn't, at least not how those words are actually used. When someone identifies as bi or gay, they are expressing 3 things, 1. I probably like some form of gay porn (check) 2. I have an attraction towards men when I'm around them (no) 3. I have or will have sex with men (no). Basically, my problem was that only 1 of those things applied to me, so calling myself bi never felt right because it was only partially true, while the most important implications of the label were false. >Sorry for the wall of text but this was like a eureka moment for me, I see so many guys confused about their sexuality and I think this is precisely why. Don't get me wrong, by the textbook definition of the word we are still bisexual, but the way this word is actually used in communication does not fit guys like us, it implies things about us that aren't true, so we aren't comfortable with the label. If I tell anyone that I'm bisexual, that would automatically think I'm attracted to men around me, have had sex with men or will, which isn't true. So how do you deal with a conundrum like this? I disagree
Austin Mitchell
I'm with you op. Except I'd be tempted to fuck a trans girl in asian if the opportunity presented itself. asian men make the sexiest women and their skin is milky white and hairless and they usually have plump asses to go with it
Jonathan Hernandez
>tfw discovered anal masturbation and cannot stop >takes willpower to not buy girl's clothes and more anal toys >have to take break from current toys so I can get my boihole tight again and not be a size queen >not gay but really think about being TOPPED by a neet plz stop intrusive thoughts I am not a faggot
Oliver Richardson
>Exactly. You're bisexual OP
Technically I am, but as far as how this label is actually used in communication it does not apply to me. To make a point I made a thread that said "How do I explain to people that I'm bisexual but have no interest in dating or having sex with men?" and most of the replies basically said that I'm not bisexual, because when most people think of a bisexual man, they think of someone who actually has sex with men.
If I call myself bisexual, I'm communicating that I'm interested in having sex with men, which is not true. I am not bisexual, at least not in the way this word is actually used.
Cooper Sullivan
Just admit to yourself that you have a tranny fetish and leave it at that. No reason to go labeling yourself this or that.
Charles Garcia
Dude I have no problems with what I like. I'm not some scared christian boy raised in a homophobic household, I'm a fucking degenerate, I would tell the whole world I love tranny porn if they gave a fuck, the only problem is that then they would think that I have sex with men, which isn't true.
David Price
You, like most of them, are an extremely insecure bisexual at least, and probably gay. The insecurity part comes from the fact you're only letting yourself feel attracted to men when they emasculate themselves to an extreme for you. That's the tipoff: You're attracted to weakness here. Which is fine, sort of, as long as it doesn't reflect on some other dark aspect of your personality. Abusive people get off on that, for example.
Logan Parker
Well, then I guess the answer to your conundrum is to simply not tell anyone. I'd rather people think I'm a degenerate than think that I have sex with men
Jaxon Hughes
>You, like most of them, are an extremely insecure bisexual at least, and probably gay.
I don't think so, I feel like its just a porn fetish to be honest. If I told you I fap to furry porn but don't wanna fuck my dog you'd believe me, but for some reason when its something gay people can't accept that.
Jonathan Hernandez
a man in a dress is not suddenly female. you're a homosexual, like 90% of this thread and board.
That's completely different. Zoophiles fundamentally don't care about consent. Anthro, fictional things, they're in your head and consent is not an issue. What we're talking about here is a very real attraction to male anatomy, but in the specific context of men being emasculated. That strongly suggests a deep insecurity and desire to dominate men, which is what makes it sexually exciting.
Easton Ross
>Well, then I guess the answer to your conundrum is to simply not tell anyone.
Yeah for now I've been keeping it to myself, but I'm not ashamed of what I like to masturbate to so I feel like eventually I'm gonna have to explain to people that I like dick but don't really wanna fuck dudes.
>a man in a dress is not suddenly female. you're a homosexual
You're right, but I'm not a homo homo, only technically homo.
>. That strongly suggests a deep insecurity and desire to dominate men
Well that doesn't make sense because I self insert as the trap most of the times. Being fucked like a bitch looks fun, but also uncomfortable and silly.
Christian Robinson
Okay, so it's the opposite, but fundamentally still the same thing. People express insecurity often in one of two ways, either desiring to dominate or be dominated. If your problem is that you think you'd look silly, again, that's your own insecurity. It really does sound like, the more you explain, the more it's obvious that you're super insecure and homosexual.
The fundamental part is this: If you are only letting yourself feel attracted to feminization, there's a reason for it, and most often (just look at the "LGBT" (trans) board) that's a deep insecurity over your own masculinity. Plenty of secure men are gay, but we don't feel the need to be totally degraded and feminized just to feel attracted to other men. I'm gay myself, the only people I've ever met like you are hugely psychologically troubled. The kind who keep it on "down low" and use grindr at age 65 to cheat on their wives.
Dominic Jackson
>It really does sound like, the more you explain, the more it's obvious that you're super insecure and homosexual.
I don't think that's it at all though. I'll admit homosex has a certain appeal to it, but my attraction to men just isn't strong enough to where I feel compelled to have sex with them. I fap to some fag porn, blow a load and call it a day, its not a big deal to me. You're projecting your level of interest in men onto me and assuming since I'm not like you it must be the result of some mental issue, when really its just a lack of interest interest and attraction. Not 0 attraction, but certainly not enough to where I feel like I need to put my dick in a mans asshole.
>The kind who keep it on "down low" and use grindr at age 65 to cheat on their wives.
Hey now, I would at least have the integrity to divorce the bitch before draining balls with my mouth.
Benjamin Allen
Fundamentally all I am trying to do is make you aware of the very real possibility that you're letting your insecurities and perceptions of homosexual relationships warp your ideas. I think instead of fetishizing effeminacy you might want to just consider two regular men in a healthy relationship, and put some very real thought into why you feel this desire to be feminized like that.
I'm not saying it's a bad thing, but when you're using it to deny your obvious attraction something is wrong in your head.
Zachary Morris
>Fundamentally all I am trying to do is make you aware of the very real possibility that you're letting your insecurities and perceptions of homosexual relationships warp your ideas.
I worried about this as well, but that's just not the case. I was never the least bit homophobic, even as a kid common sense told me that beauty is in the eye of the beholder so some men would like other men. I like blue, he likes red, I like girls, he likes boys, so what? Because of this I was very accepting of the possibility of not being straight when I jacking off to all that tranny porn, but the few things that I liked about guys was always negated by all the things I don't find attractive about them, so I never did anything until I just decided that it wasn't for me.
Well it isn't like it's a big deal. So you have a fetish. Oh well.
Alexander Lopez
you could've just said your gay, faggot
Jordan Peterson
>Well it isn't like it's a big deal.
I know, but what bothers me is that I don't have a label that precisely expresses my sexual desires. I'm not straight because I like fapping to tranny porn, I'm not gay/faggot because I'm attracted to woman, and I'm not a bisexual because I don't want to have sex with men. Every label implies something about me that isn't true.
Anthony Jones
Kinda sounds like autogynephilia?
Andrew Gutierrez
faggot you like sticking things up your ass you're GAAAAY
Leo Watson
I know what that is, but lets be honest most people would have no idea what I'm talking about.
I would have no problem accepting those labels if I wanted to have sex with men, but I don't.
The problem with the categories of hetero-, bi-, and homosexual is that they focus on attributes which may not be decisive. It seems like the biggest draw for you is feminine signifiers, with biological sex as a secondary attribute. You're trying to use terms that only relate to biological sex to describe your particular brand of faggotry when it's obvious that another set of definitions based on presentation would better articulate OP's feelings.
