/britfeel/

swine flu killed 300,000 people and infected 60 million, corona has fucked up really, it showed its hand too early, started too fast, based swine flu was very slow to get going so it had chance to explode when it wanted to, corona is just too impatient

with that said im still bricking it

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-8124019/Holly-Willoughby-FLED-Celebrity-Juice-studio.html
But seriously
*giggles tae fuck*

>Anybody else think the AI robot overlords did this to speed up the singularity?
nah not really m8

>tfw no miss chug drinking buddy

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wake me up when the young and healthy are dying, otherwise I couldn't give two shits

Veganonce was one of the discord paedophiles though.

ran him out of town like a common Pygmy

I still think it's BigRoll.
>more people are having cleaner, healthier poos for some reason
>toilet roll is produced in surplus
>the Toilet Roll Consortium doubt that paper processing plants will by up all their produce
>the Toilet Roll Consortium makes virus to provoke panic buying.

Me dad is very concerned over the virus lads. Over the last few years he's been more nervous about things.
Reckon it's hormone replacement time for him.

>had a nice shower
>mum making an omelette
>gonna buy some cans from the shop
noice

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you better panic buy them tinnies to make sure no normals can have any, lad

none of these conspiracies make sense when you consider it's only a short term profit gain and if everyone's got large stocks of bog roll the sales will drop to zero after this is over

another pep talk from are lad. cheers boris mate

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Swine flu only killed 214 people (officially) in the UK. Coronachan will easily beat those numbers.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2009_flu_pandemic_in_the_United_Kingdom

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>using bold, underline and italics
yikes

So it's not beatable? Great.

>2009_flu_pandemic_in_the_United_Kingdom
cant read these words getting all teary eyed and *sippy*

Bit of a change from ALL YOUR GRANDPARENTS WILL DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that he was saying last week.
Also, "we know how to beat it"
Sweet, no more daily death tolls.

>tfw no comfy interview where i get to put together a little kit

I'm beating it multiple times a day right now

Put together a lil survival kit for this lil happening.

Italy
youtube.com/watch?v=SVodALR3Zoo

>I'm beating it multiple times a day right now
wehey

I will be dead chuffed if I get it lad, commute it just half an hour along back roads too. I just hope they offer me a decent salary

We don't have to put goldfish bowls on our heads as well do we?

>tories following scientific advise
lol.

i saw this coming months ago

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-s +c

youtube.com/watch?v=QJUBNsLz7LQ
Gurdwara is still open

You have bought packs of batteries haven't you lads? I mean you wouldn't want one of your remotes, torches or small appliances to go dead during the quarantine would you?

Already got me survival bag, got a few tins of food in case I need to go bush.
Hope you get it lad. Reckon now is an ok time to apply for jobs? I recently became jobless so need something

ill just borrow some of my mums

Only need 3 AA batteries for my automatic cat feeder, and I don't use that that often.

>mike about to build a ghetto phone charger
>mexican lady just fetches a phone charger from the other room
bravo vince
can't wait for the next episode

Super dumb scene. Like that bint would have any clue what he was doing, and like she'd even have a charger anyway.

lmao at that lying old woman hoarding bogroll on the news

Bit funny the WHO live feed had transmission issues though eh. Just as qt mccoronafu was talking as well, ffs.

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Just saw that! That's where all the bog roll has gone, bloody old spakkas

my mere presence intimidates you

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I talked to them about the situation and it seems like they have no plans to halt work any time soon. I even got an email earlier reassuring me an upcoming interview for another company will still be going ahead as planned. I think most business are largely continuing as normal but with less staff and careful monitoring of handwashing/staff health

ALL PRAISE TO THE MOST HIGH

it just got a lot more envious in here

Based coronachan will rework society model

independent.co.uk/voices/letters/coronavirus-universal-basic-income-ubi-poverty-economy-business-migrants-a9408846.html

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Just can't help it eh.
lil attentionfag whether there's a trip or just the name. veganfag think we're as thick as pubes.

do you think Mexicans still communicate with those old-timey windup telephones where you speak into a cup?

Parents got this in the mail today.

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work is being very quiet and vague about what is going to happen over the next few days. I think at least a few of us are for the chop

Ah right, I will go ahead with it then. Hark at you getting 2 interviews, jobchad you are

It was on tv last night. It's all that's been on tv. Also an infected person probably touched that.

fucking this
agreed x100

You're insinuating that, not me.

I'm as surprised as you are lad. First ~month and a half of unemployment I didn't get a single response, then end of Feb I suddenly get 4 in quick succession. Even had to turn one down cause it was too far away

*replies to himself*

There we go, gone back into college trying to make something out of my life with trade spending time and money it will probably end up closing down (college falls under the whole schools shutting down) and not to mention ill end up getting harrased under the new powers as the filth HATE me
Why the fuck do I even bother? Suicide by ARU imminent within the next week or so i reckon

have you ever had a woman get really angry at you on the phone and it's a bit sexy?

Shhhhhh everyone, boris is speaking

>like she'd even have a charger anyway.
why not?

Anyone heard the rumour that the UK is going into lockdown from tomorrow evening until at least April 5th? Apparently Bojo briefed the military about it today.

coronavirus won't even show up

emergency powers is tomorrow, the lockdown isn't until next week

>someone asks me how am I doing
>give a paragraph of corona paranoia
This is why I dont have friends right?

ls that the word on the street?

How are my garden chads doing? Got my carrot seeds today, and some broccoli seeds too. Now I have all my seeds for this year. Also sowed some wildflowers and tilthed up my beds a bit more.

Kids are the main spreaders of flu and cold, makes sense to keep the lil killers socialising if you want to really thin the heard whilst pretending you care.

Kill the system, start afresh
*trades you a pebble for a wham bar*

how many of your parents and grandparents are gonna utterly ignore any kind of isolation advice?

i sniff pure flake

She knew he wanted to make a call, he's sitting there with wires and his phone, the logical conclusion is that he needs a phone charger

>bwahhh mm bah un frarrghful veni vidi vici ahhhh har hum glaarghbul lets get it done ah ermmm squash that sombrero haha yes my friends protos heuretes

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Thoughts and prayers are with Shippy at this time.

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all lower class morons like the people I work with will

they talk all the time at work about how it's unfair that they're being asked not to go out and they'll do it anyway, and that it's not that serious, just get it and be done with it

never mind the people you'll be passing it onto with health conditions, eh?

Luckily my parents retired in a rural hamlet, and their neighbors are farmers

because otherwise they'd be out getting themselves infected as fast as possible after all it's just the flu lol

YOUR ARE 70

wow it's like he's right here in the thread with us

i drink the finest liquor

finally some good news
no way i'm going to my uc hearing tomorrow

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is the Peckhamlad white and how old is he? I live not too far away and probably know people who'd know of him if he isnt a larp.