/britfeel/

might pop to Lidl and get some bakery items, see if they've finally restocked hand sanitiser too

Attached: 485.png (852x944, 70.2K)

Reposting due to old thread

I have chronic pain due to my spinal condition. It was also elevated yesterday due to it being the first day of my period.
Got into work and then got a message to go to reception. I got sent these this morning

Attached: IMG_20200306_092437.jpg (4000x3000, 1.19M)

who sent you flowers

Glad they reached you honey x

I woke up :(
I hate when this happens

Don't worry fren. Only several more hours until comfy sleep again.

My mother and stepfather
Cute larp lad x

Attached: chip1.jpg (1348x1718, 236.77K)

right I'll get ready to go to work now and today I shall do my best to avoid as much work as possible so I'm not tired when I get home

>tfw mum never flips the cap back on the fairy liquid when she's done

had a dream I was on a date with a hot Hispanic girl, a little older than me but not a milf or anything. We were sat at a table in a restaurant and it was going really well, I made her laugh a couple times while we were deciding what to order. Then I turn to my right and my dad is sitting right next to me at an adjacent table, and he leans over and suggests I order the oysters in a sort of "wink wink nudge nudge" way. I'm irritated that my dad has decided to follow me and my date into a restaurant and tell him I can't stand oysters and to leave us alone, but he persists. By that point the Hispanic girl had left and then I woke up

Purchased a month plus worth of non-perishable food and 20 gallons of bottled water, taking advantage of the early hours I was the only 'idiot' in the store. Dirty fucking refugees brought this virus to my doorstep now I'm very upset.

Very few prepared for this virus so good luck spastic spastic mong boys you'll need it. Hatches firmly battened down it's time for a Guinness or six (6). hic

MONG BOY MONG BOY WAAAAA

Attached: hero bear.jpg (1536x2048, 387.22K)

for me? its going out for a walk on on the school run to look at all the school girls in their short skirts. unbelievable what the mums let their kids wear to school.

why do the "pepper" mongs bulk buy water - do they think the taps will stop working? And if that actually did happen, whatever water they had would be used up in a matter of days so it's utterly pointless hoarding it

The water system won't go out

*pulls you down to the ground and starts beating you*
STARE AT ME CHANTELLE LYKE DAT AGEN AND AHLL FOOKIN KILL YA

Attached: 1548539691820.png (772x1228, 97.33K)

I remember in highschool they would just hike up their skirts as soon as they arrived, as far as their mums knew they were still at a normal length

lass I used to fancy has one of those birthday donation things on the facebook. thinking if I donate a sizeable portion I might get into her pants.

yeah lad nowt more sexy than some beta who thinks he can pretend you're a prostitute
give your money to me instead

really want a wank but I'll be having sex with the gf tonight

all women are prostitutes in denial

>"pepper" mongs

Love the low IQ 'logic'; means there's more cheap water for me. When you've got no water you'll be dead within a week (population control).

>The water system won't go out

You better cross everything it don't sunshine.

Attached: gas shower wa waaa.jpg (135x161, 10.1K)

Fucked my back up so much that I've had to have provisions left next to the bed in case I can't get up for tea/food. It feels good and bad at the same time.

Yeah lad, send her 500 quid and she's practically guaranteed to open her legs for you

>in denial
They fully embrace it. Buy them dinner, take them on a nice date, give them some expensive jewelry and they'll hop on your dick.

>tfw co-worker gets angry at you and asks "do you even have any friends?"
>reply with "y-y-yeah"

bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-51697553

Riz Ahmed is literally becoming his Four Lions character.

Sounds like workplace bullying, time for a trip to HR.

Who are you friends anyway??

it would be immoral not to if we're talkin that kinda money

wtf, only britfeel is allowed take the piss out of based moni

according to the world health organisation each person needs a MINIMUM of 1.6 gallons a of water a day for survival. If you're very careful you might just be able to make those 20 gallons last a couple weeks at best

It's that easy lads, all you have to do is give them literally all your money

Can't decide whether I prefer Foreground Eclipse or Band Maid.
youtu.be/whoUiCIeke4
youtu.be/9TkHpvaO09c

BM have more attractive women and easier listening songs, but technically FG are the more competent musicians and have less of a pop vibe.

oh, well it was right after they found out I was snitching and I responded to one guy with "It was nice knowing you" after he realised I contributed to pushing him towards handing in his resignation

My friends are mostly 6'2, they include my 6'2 scientist friend, Shippy, Shutin, Andrew, Irish friend/gardening user and Ebin

I know for a fact that none of those people consider you a friend.

All those people are 6'2?
Or were you trying to list them sensibly but your lust for that guy took over?

morning all. sad day today after one of the peregrine falcons living in my county got shot and died. sad times. lovely little birdies were just nesting up and the public loved seeing them in town. pour one out for our fallen avian friend, lads. aside from that, it's a decent morning here. got a large toffee latte from maccies and a bottle of water. looking forward to the weekend, even though i've got no plans. how are you lads and ladettes doing? neetfolk up to anything interesting?

good luck lad! i don't play that game but trucker life looks comfy.

if you're not larping, where do you keep all of your supplies lad? i've been wanting to stock up for a while but i live in a flat, so i'm not rich in space. urban prepping seems like it has some of its own pitfalls like that.

any news on when your blog will exit lockdown? it's the only blog i keep up with other than ebin's.

Attached: pidgeot-jungle-ju-8.jpg (600x825, 136.33K)

>ywn be moni's friend

6'2 isn't my only 6'2 friend, I was just pointing out that coincidentally many of my friends are 6'2

6'2 = 6'2 scientist

None of those people actually like you, they just keep you around for amusement, especially Ebin and Shippy who only care about yous

>any news on when your blog will exit lockdown? it's the only blog i keep up with other than ebin's
Might be best to just create a wordpress account and request access, otherwise it will be Wednesday

*runs into the thread with a large net, captures the nearest lad and drags him off*

Good morning my name is 6'2 Gravedigger and I'll be the latest addition to Poleys roster of imaginary friends

I know Shippy and Ebin exist but the rest are just straight up fiction.

>imaginary friends
Funny thing about that is that when everyone started sitting away from me, I joked about having imaginary friends, started talking to them etc, everyone found it funny at the time

I've got access to the blog. The last entry is called exposed (again)

Wouldn't mind Amer's co-worker replacing him as a thread regular.

I'm not but I got a diabeetus test a few years ago. I asked If I needed my NHS number on my urine sample since I didn't know I needed it at the time and the receptionist said that I didn't. Should I go back for another test?

Sweet lad, can't wait to meet you at Moni's next party

let's go round the room and everyone say your name and one interesting thing about you

Moni do you ever finger your butthole?

Which one, the African, WoW woman or Koreaboo?

All of them hate Britian

There's the big guy and taxidermy woman too, like them

It's gonna be off the chain lad

My name is Monica and I like musicals

any coffee man in? Tea is for poofs and women

I'll be attending this one if Moni provides gluten free food options.

Hey, I'm Leonard.
I once held the world record for lap time on Sonic Oval in F-Zero GX.

You lads tried them coffee to go Nescafe gold blend cups you get in pound shop? Not bad 99p and they got coffee and coffee mate on em, good for lazy sods like myself tbqh
Anyway, I'm off to the dentist wish me luck lads hope I don't get Corona

I want to get infected with coronav

I like both. Can you handle that mate?
Twat.

No Poley.
Monica is the name of the girl you stalked, terrorised and ultimately posted nude pictures of online, that you took secretly with a hidden camera.
Pick a different name you sick, sex predator.

actually no, I can't. I need to lie down for a bit

Sorry Moni. I won't be able to attend your meetup. I have a large sum of money but won't be able to access it without a loan from you. Please assist me and I'll give you 20% of the sum and attend your meetup

MY NAME IS MONICA AND I'M A POOPAHOLIC

i'll wait until wednesday. i'm sure it'll roll around in no time. plus, means i'll have a nice backlog of material to read. you do post daily, iirc?

my name is user, and i have a small dent in my head from when i fell out of a pram and onto the floor as a baby.

based! never played that game but love speedruns and time trials. nice work lad.

Attached: abra-team-rocket-tr-49.jpg (600x825, 148.31K)

My name is Monica and I'm wearing a nappy

Wow, it's good to see so many friends here today.
How did we all meet Moni? I cold called her once at work and the conversation was so enthralling I just had to meet this dusky, desert princess in real life. I was not disappointed.

Cool avatar dude, keep it up.

I met Monica at poopaholics anonymous where he recanted a wonderful limerick about pooping down the infidels chimneys.

>according to the world health organisation each person needs a MINIMUM of 1.6 gallons a of water a day for survival
>1.6 gallons a of water a day

That's equivalent to 7.3 litres of water, per day.............. really?

Possibly YES - hot climate, high physical activity - worst case. Do you honestly take 7.3 litres of water per day (inc water in food)? (lol)

Attached: wa wa waaa.jpg (157x216, 9.14K)

>ex-gf is pregnant
>says she's at 3 months
>haven't seen her in 5

What are my options? How do I get out of this when it obviously isn't mine.

there's alot of nonces out on r9k today lads

You need to wash, clean food/plates, flush waste etc. on top of just drinking it.

You just ignore it lad. What's the worst that will happen?
It's not like she can prove paternity if you've got the dates right.

Survival situation mong boy. DAMMMMMMN ye's a thirsty. That water's going down yer throat. Just admit you're a mong boy.

Attached: 0a7f1501059c2a0c71729c4afc4e532c.jpg (305x324, 26.02K)