Was running earlier this morning and met a 8/10 girl. Got her Snapchat and we plan on meeting up tomorrow...

>four years ago
>backpacking for two weeks in the Smokeys
>preseason, haven't seen another soul in three or four days
>set up camp early, just stand there in my underwear for an hour not moving and enjoying the quiet
>hear someone jogging up the trail
>see 9/10 blonde girl trail running, hair up in cute braids, 80's style calisthenics clothes
>"hey, what are you looking for?"
>stare at her
>haven't spoken in 72 hours at least, just vocalize "gyuuh"
>"are you ok?"
>nod vigorously
>"haha well there are supposed to be those giant salamanders around here, keep an eye out for them!"
>try to offer her some water, hold bottle out and rasp "ruuh hirsthmy?"
>she smiles and says no thanks and keeps going

I'm not sure if I actually saw her or if she was some kind of hallucination or forest nymph. I have dreams about this woman on a regular basis.

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Very based

You were visited by aliens

lmao she probably though you were a flushed junkie or something

>Got her snapchat
Do guys not even get actual phone numbers anymore? What the fuck

Unless she was doing like 30 miles that day I have no idea how she even got that far out, the nearest road intersection was nowhere around there.

oh gramps, drink your prune juice and go to bed

God, I was just joking. Now I'm scared, spooky.

Literally anything. 10/10 chance you fill the niche for someone out there, just talk to guys bc if they're not talking to you it means you attract the shy type

>Conservative values, pretty smile, fun to be around, responsible, debt-free, dresses politely but not a drag, doesn't smoke, stays fit and healthy, can cook, you're her first, good parents (and by extension good values), profession, etc.
You honestly sound like 30 something single moms / used party girls with an insane and unrealistic list of demands for their potential future partner while being oblivious to the fact they themselves don't bring half of that to the table.
Not that I disagree with whatever you listed, but I don't know any woman being like that IRL.
If you're past 25 year old, no women will meet these standards. I'd argue even past 20.

too late, i already shit myself. enjoy being one of the other 38 dudes she sends the same exact picture to zoomer

This is correct. Being "her first" knocks 95% of girls out after the age of 18 and the other 5% are virgins for a reason, just like OP

>5% are virgins
Are we really that rare?

>meet girl like this
>she's 3/10

Should I just go for it, lads? The only 'risk' I see is that in 15 years I'd be more vulnerable to the urge to cheat with a more attractive woman, and I'd hate to ever be a cheater.

Is this song a valid argument?
youtube.com/watch?v=Qh9ZZgDqzAg

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>we
Male virgins are not that much.
Females ? Come on dude, if she wants some, she'll get some.
If she's still a virgin she's either
> hideous
> won't lower her standards to a realistic point, i.e. a 4/10 always aiming for a 9/10 Chad and no less
> ultra religious and/or cockblocked by her family/community
> disabled somehow

All a woman has to do is to be willing and to put herself out there a little bit to get some action.

Go for it dic, no use in not

It's true that I don't want it or that I don't put myself out there, but 5% is a bit unbelivable.

I don't believe you are a girl.
5% may be an exaggeration if we're talking 18 year olds, but by 25 it's very realistic.

How do you have the balls to go backpacking alone?

>user, you're home?
>I've made some food for you user! *kiss* *hug*
>How was your day user?

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WHY

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What part of
>beside the obvious
did you not understand?

Do you mean injury-wise or crackhead-wise? The only issue I have with long solo trips is the older I get the more crowded my mind gets when I try to sleep.

I understand why you don't believe me, I'm 22 so I guess it's a bit higher for that age group

I mean injury-wise, animal-wise, crackhead-wise, murder-wise, disease-wise, and weird shit-wise

Post a timestamp, user, and I'll believe what my eyes see.
If you're 22 and still virgin, which one of the aforementioned category do you think you fit in ?

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That’s why he fucks and you dont

>fucking upside down

How do full time phoneposters do it?

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cooking level, cleaning n shit....these are not wrong to look for in a girl, it really helps out the relationship

Pleass stop, I'm gonna cry

Her waist obviously isn't that high but there's something wrong about the length of her arm

I've gone with groups and solo, and I find that when I'm with someone else I spend so much time worrying about them not staying clean and staying hydrated and cleaning cuts and burns that I end up neglecting my own condition and gear. When you're solo you can focus on what you're doing a lot better.

I'll go to developed campsites with friends, but for any kind of long distance trip I prefer to go alone.

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probably
well got any more stories of weird shit happening out in the woods?

Disabled, I guess?

>I guess?
How are you not sure ?

I'm very shy to the point that I can't go outside alone

So mentally disabled. Btw where do i find girls like you? Do i need to start breaking into homes?

That is not a medical disability but it does reek of some sort of trauma/ personality disorder.
Anyway, if you really *are* a girl, you could still get some, the only reason you haven't is because you don't want to, and girls like you are rare, so the 5% figure isn't unrealistic.
Timestamp too, faggot

Once I was hiking near Lynchburg Reservoir and I was going through the remains of an old freed black town in a valley. There were tons of small heaps of building stone and foundations and old chimneys still there from when the population was forced out for the National Park. There's a trail shelter right in the middle, and it was getting late, so I was getting ready to spend the night there. The valley is only a couple hundred yards across and really steep with a nice creek going down the middle where the shelter is, and the old church ruins are right across the stream. I was smoking my pipe like a tryhard and making some coffee when all of a sudden absolutely all ambient sound just dropped away except for the sound of the stream. I thought my ears had just bottomed out at first but I could hear my own actions perfectly well.

Then I looked across the way at the church, and I saw the shadow of another person as clear as day against the chimney, like if there was a spotlight on someone, and it seemed like it was off-angle with the rest of the tree shadows. And as I looked at it for a few seconds, it just slid off the chimney.

Nominally I don't really believe in ghosts, but I just stood up, loudly said I was sorry for intruding, packed up my shit and walked another few miles up to camp. And as soon as I started moving out of the valley again, the ambient sound picked up again and I heard the breeze and twigs rustling and bugs flying around again.

Those folks really didn't want my ass there that night I'm pretty sure.

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There’s stories of the Brown Mountain Lights a few miles away too, not sure if they’re related but I don’t know much about /x/ stuff.

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Probably

Not the poster your replying too. But I often go backpacking alone. I go out really far into wilderness areas so I see a shit ton of animals. But one time I went on a two week trip in the uinta mountains in utah for a trout fishing. I was about 20 miles from either trail head and decided to take a detour to a small lake called shadow lake. And it was the most beautiful lake I had ever seen. Hundreds of trout jumping, No trails or ANY signs of people in 5 miles. So I set up camp on the waters edge and cooked up some fresh caught trout. The entire time I felt like I was being watched. And about twilight I start seeing these shadows. They look like fucking slenderman but black. Fuzzy edges like fur and half as tall as the pines across the lake. I said fuck it I must be dehydrated and went to sleep right as it got dark. I woke up to noises around my camp a couple of times but I was bear proofed and wasnt too worried, because honestly, I probably was dehydrated. But I woke up and half my shit was at the top of trees. Nothing else happened. So I grabbed everything I could climb to and GTFO. Didnt even get to fish that pristine lake.

Here's a picture of the chimney off google too, for what it's worth.

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I'm definitely sure now that you have encountered ayy lmaos

I know i shouldnt trust anything on this site but im spooked

For me it's coyotes at night. They sound like human children screaming and have no compunctions about walking right up to your tent and sniffing your shit.

I know they're harmless compared to bears and wild pigs but goddamn they sound weird.

>environmental storytelling

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This is getting scary

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user, this is a classic. Let me deduce everything from a to z for you, as per protocol.

I'll begin immediatly by stating what you saw. It was one of them vile creatures. They only come out on unsuspecting victims, isolated from other living entities. They're cold and calculating. Your next move may very well be your last. You're lucky, user, real lucky, because I'm an expert. And to other anons reading this, you better sit uptight and read this shit with utmost attention, beause this is as real as it gets.

Now, I want you to drive to your nearest Walmart and go to aisle 3. Grab as many deenz as you can untill it feels like your bones can't carry no more. Then, the next time you see this evil creature show up, I want you to scream from the top of your lungs; "Begone evil creature!" as you unpack and throw sardines one by one straight towards her direction.

Now, she should frown and look at you with absolute disgust, but that is normal. You've got her attention now user, good job. Next, I want you to look her in the eye, envision your 1 rep max and emulate the sound you'd make, as you struggle to push the weight off yourself.

She'll now run off, congratulations user, you've succesfully secured your virginity.

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It was a bigfoot

>omega-3s shield your virtue

Truly based.

>he gets intimidated by a bunch of non-corporeal dead dudes
cringe, should have show him that your not a pussy

What do you want from a lady?
>A girl who understands I'm a cry baby who still gets shit done
>Understands I'm bipolar but not extreme.
>Lets me hug her at random times
>Sits on my face every once in a while without asking me
>Cooks and cleans once in a while.
That's all I want.

Not intruding on people's solitude is a basic rule of trail etiquette, like burying your shit and leaving some dry kindling in trail huts.

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Am I weird if I got to the point that I realize I don't know how to handle or be with a gf anymore?
>nothing in terms of female interaction in middle or highschool
>only thing I got in college was a hug
>FF to now
>Gods blessed me with a vast amount of wealth of land,money and a huge ass house
>so homebodied that I am home as much as possible
>only go down the street to my gym warehouse to workout then back home
>only interactions I have usually is with my parents who live with me and sporadic people but because of shelter in place realize how alone I am

I was musing about it last night that I have no idea how to handle being with a girl or having a girlfriend that actually cares about me. I'm so use to doing my own thing and feel like I missed the boat perse. I don't drink, drugs, party, or any of that stuff.

I'm not lonely just kind of a revelation.

>They look like fucking slenderman but black. Fuzzy edges like fur and half as tall as the pines across the lake
Something like pic related?

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This, shouldve ripped down that fucking church and pissed on the remains

>imagine thinking riding miles of dick is something acceptable and unavoidable

Literally sounds like something out of a story

I'm 31 and don't understand this Snapchat business. Do teens not ask for phone numbers or emails anymore?

You're allowed to explain that after a couple dates, just don't sound like a sadcunt about it. "Hey I just wanted you to know I'm new to all this, so I might miss a couple obvious hints". It gives them a little more control, but that's the price you have to pay to cure tfwnogf sometimes.

Do not say "HEY I'M A VIRGIN AND DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO", though.

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>emails

>I'm 31 and don't understand this phone number business. Do teens not write each other letters and walk down to the malt shop together anymore?

Snapchat is a safety valve for new social contacts because it's less personal/intimate than direct phone communication, and makes quick banter easy while also making it easy to cut things off if it doesn't work out.

honestly just someone to share stuff and fuck hard.
Im a simple man