Man, I just watched 33 minutes of DOOM Eternal gameplay and it is fucking TERRIBLE. Jesus...

nobody cares michael.

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ok faggot

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>youtube.com/watch?v=L9-T9c44zxs

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I am and you can't stop me.

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What's wrong, anime tranny, are you waiting for your raid timer in "Super Mega Final Omega Fantasy 59©®™: I Swear This Time It's Final™©®" to expire? Are you stuck on the evil Japanese highschooler™ boss in "Fursona 5™©®: I Shoot Myself In The Head To Enter Super Sayian™©® Mode, Mom!" because you can't play Rock Paper Scissors? Or are you waiting for your BoyClit™ to recharge so you can coom to K-On!™ and Kin-iro! Mosaic™ gifs one last time before your Neo-Vagina™©® surgery in Thailand tomorrow?
No one who wants to buy or pirate Doom: Eternal cares that you and your 5 "friends" on Discord™©® decided to make incessant shitpost threads about the game. In fact, since we've already seen the exact same thing happen 4 years ago with Doom Reboot, this is what you're going to do:
1) Make these threads until the game releases
2) Buy it despite hating it "so you can prove Yas Forums wrong"
3) Seethe eternally (no pun intended) because it turns out the game is actually fun, something not yet achieved by Regendairy Nippon Consours Made Ob Purastik Forded Ober Wan Tausan Taimu™©® you pay your NEETbux to for season passes, exclusives inevitably ported or emulated on PC, and other nonsense you are the target audience for.
But hey, look on the bright side, Mr. anime tranny - once it's out, you can take a break from the four years of anti-Doom Reboot threads so you can spend another 6 making these, assuming you don't join the 41.3+% by then.
Have fun and remember - Douche and Dilate™!

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people like OP need to be put on some government list, take a look at the effort this faggot is having at trying to prevent sales from a game, psychopathic level of autism

Look at the effort that ID is 'having' to get you to buy Mario 64 again you stupid faggot

OP here. I FORGOT, you collect health by picking up fucking grape soda, OMG how fucking hardcore.

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you did that in the original games, too. yummy.

Yeah and it was gay then too

>acrobatics feats are feminine now
When the hell did men swinging off of bars become a bad thing?

nobody cares michael

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I can't wait to buy Doom Etern-

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It's 2019 OP, anyone who actually liked Doom, the real Doom, either killed themselves or got off Yas Forums to go raise a family. All that's left are peabrained children who think the core of Doom are scripted cutscenes and terrible guns.

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ok faggot

Come on faggots, this shit is shit, join me in watching *yet another* Bethesda dumpster fire.

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Ahhhhh the power of the f*male brain.

I miss when Yas Forums didn’t completely fucking suck. Is there lead in the water or some shit, why is everybody so goddamn stupid now?

Bing, bing, wahoo!

>It's 2019
You just get out of a coma, buddy?

Fuck off ZOOM shills

>STOP LIKING NEW THINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
FUck off you Doom permavirgins. play the wad where you kill yourself

Doom 2016 had the same neon bubblegum punk horror feel. Just look at the pentagrams.

>watched
try actually playing the damn thing

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define 'shill'.

>You're not seriously buying this shit are you?
Yes.

anyone who doesn't feel negatively towards a game

I'm not playing this shit lmao. Maybe when they release mod tools so that people can fix Bethesda's mess (again.)

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what did the mentally ill incel zoomer mean by this?

Watch the fucking video retard, you don't 'actually' want to play this red-hot dogshit, I promise you.

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>HE SAID IT GUYS!!! BING BING WAHOO!!! IT"S A ME, DOOMGUY!11!! HAHAHA ZOOMERS BTFOD AGAIN!!! REALLY LMAOING AT ZOOMERS LIVES RIGHT NOW!!! NO ONE REALLY CARE ABOUT ZOOMY WOOMY TWENTYSIXTOOMY AND ZOOM ETERNAL RIGHT?! RIGHT?!

Incomprehensible. NEXT!

guys a copy of doom eternal just flew over my house

gee you must be such a lucky faggot.

>HE CAN"T READ CAPITALIZED GREENTEXT. CONFIRMED RETARD.

>Man, I just watched 33 minutes of DOOM Eternal gameplay and it is fucking TERRIBLE. Jesus, it opens with some late-thirties boomer that looks like he was ripped STRAIGHT outta Gears Of War who's speaking all cryptically in some unskippable cutscene. The whole hub world looks like shit.

>Cue the descent into 'hell,' which is just Bowser's Castle from from fucking Super Mario Bros-- not even joking, the floor is lava, there's ZERO shooting, just a bunch of shitty platforming, jumping from floating hexagonal platform to hexagonal platform and dodging spinning flails.

>There are horizontal gymnast bars everywhere that you're expected to spin around and jump off of like a fucking ballerina, and there's sections where you have to climb walls like fucking Catwoman-- complete with a cute little 'claw-hand' animation, you almost expect to hear Doomguy start hissing 'cause he's a BAD KITTY (˵Φ ω Φ˵)

>When you finally start killing demons? They explode into a bunch of pink, purple and green candy pieces. Is it a demonic beast or a fucking PEZ dispenser? Following every battle, LOOK AROUND, you'll notice that there's ZERO blood, ZERO gore, ZERO bodies, ZERO bullet shells, it's like the carnage never even happened.

>The UI is gay as fuck, it's drenched in neon, the inspo for this shit struck the programmer when he was at a fucking Pride Parade for sure. There's some way overly complicated upgrade system, it looks like a fucking RPG. I want to shoot demons, not meticulously plan my fucking build order. The whole art direction is so different from DOOM 2016, it's not even reasonable sci-fi anymore, it seriously looks like a fucking Nintendo game.

>The glory kills? I watched the player do the EXACT SAME glory kill against the first... idk, NINE Mancubi encountered. At one point the player 'flipped' an Arachnotron over, like a fucking turtle, my god, what a devastating attack!

>The entire thing looks gay as fuck. You're not seriously buying this shit are you?

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You're not wrong, but you're not really describing anything new, we've all seen this.
And the drones can't actually argue against anything other than shitty strawman.

This is Doom now. Rip and tear and upgrade weapons and climb walls and watch cutscenes and press x for a "cool" animation with heavy DoF.

>You're not seriously buying this shit are you?
*Anons say yes, dilate, ect*
>F-fuck off, shill! If you like the game you're a shill!
He's obsessed.

>campaign is once again less than 10 hours long
Are you kidding me with this garbage

>Implied stuttering
You can suck my hairy American ballsack.

Let's see here.

Doom Eternal
Final Fantasy VII Remake
All three Resident Evil remakes

All of them the target of years-long nonstop whining, shitposting, and bitchbaby retardation. All of which done in the exact same way each and every time. So, discord, is there any actual reason you're doing this? Or are you just having lulz on Yas Forums? Either way it's become predictable and pathetic.

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Fake and gay

>criticism?
>I bet the discord trannies did this!

Go back to eating terds.

That's another thing I don't get. Why is any thread about a popular AAA release automatically labeled as a shill thread?

Go back to collecting coins. Bing, Bing, Wahoo!

They like to pretend developers give a single solitary fuck about the faggots infesting Yas Forums

As expected.

>Implied stuttering
Your point is?

Take your meds.

I saw this thread yesterday

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My ballsack, doofus,