Work is cancelled due to coronavirus

based

can't fukking wait for it to hit right here. I work in a school and a town close to mine had their first student case of corona. Not long now....

>tfw haven't started prepping yet
Should I even? Are things really going to get that bad soon that I should start buying a shitload of whatever to last me a few months? It's hard to see it happening honestly.
american btw

>be me
>30yo underachiever with a shitty job that barely pays for my living expenses
>no savings at all
>no car
>don't even have a driver's license
>no gf
>kissless hugless virgin
>living at my parent's
I hope this ends society and me with it

expect economic downturn and empty store shelves
don't expect bodies piling up in the streets

Chances are you're gonna get the virus either way, but unless you're extremely unlucky or over 60 years old you'll mostly not even react, at worst get the flu.

If it really does get bad you'll be going to a FEMA camp anyway.

I work in a pharmacy and a case just popped up two towns away.
My only hope is that the store temporarily shuts down before we all get infected.

i work in one and have asthma. on a scale of 1-10 i'm omega fucked.

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I get paid by the hour. If I can't come in and work because of a lockdown, I don't get paid. Who do I complain to about this, and how do I acquire neet bux?

That's only for now. Viruses in circulation like to mutate. Like the Spanish flu only killed the extremely old and young... Until suddenly it started targeting almost exclusively people from age 20-40 with a 3-25 times higher mortality rate.

When that happens, then you'll get to witness the rapid collapse of society.

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When the first case hits my city everyone rushed out to supermarkets buying out everything. It was fucking dumb, even my mom bought an entire carton of indomie.
The next day everything went back to normal and people are stuck with mountains of food they'll never eat.

just don't go outside bro

>When that happens, then you'll get to witness the rapid collapse of society.

Honestly, I'm ready, I don't have much to live for.

we came so close to societal collapse but it jsut doesn't happen as it does in the movies, huh

>not getting paid $3500 a week to be infected with corona virus for treatment experiments
you basically get paid to save the world + they provide you with tv/internet and videogames in your isolation unit.

dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8090761/Get-PAID-coronavirus-Scientists-London-pay-volunteers-3-500-develop-vaccine.html

is it true that trump has the coronas? was this all planned from the start to get him infected and out of the picture?

You're prepared, then? I don't envy you but I def. can't die yet.

People spent all their resources arguing about crap that doesn't matter, like politics or freedumb.

Prepare more for unemployment, not the virus.

imagine dying a virgin lmao! better get that Yas Forums card checke at the local whorehouse before they close it down for good

Thing is, 75% of the time mutations make the virus milder. Chances are if you're near death/dead, you're not running around spreading it, which is why milder strains tend to travel more. A few super deadly viruses and diseases crop up every year from people eating random shit or handling something they shouldn't have. They don't spread most of the time because patient zero fucking dies.

It's possible, he has been in close contact with confirmed cases.

The deadlier strain also died out within a month because becoming deadlier is a retarded thing for a virus to do

>Work at a level 1 trauma center
Hold me bros...

Hopefully patient zero for the second, third and sixty fourth waves had the decency to die alone in quarantine then. Although most signs point towards this thing not going anywhere, so eventually we're going to have to deal with that. There's no harm in FOR ONCE IN THE HISTORY OF OUR STUPID RACE taking precaution, is there?

can confirm. once i upped the deadlyness of my virus in plague inc it killed more people more quickly, eventually killing every host before infecting all of the world

Honestly all things considered a win win situation

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Whoa, relax. I wasn't meaning to sound aggressive. Just explaining how virus mutations work.
That said, I'm currently broke as a joke, so preparation is out of the question for me.
Spin the wheel! Trump says it's less harmful than the flu so we're peachy keen.

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>14.88% boomercide virus
Based.

Just stock up on hand sanitizer high proof booze is better and face masks.

Literally me. Class was postponed and instead of using the day to catch up I just played vidya and coomed

Let's hope it kills all boomers.

Corona-chan in the house tonight
All the boomers gonna have a bad time

this makes me believe the "conspiracy" theory I heard, where apparently it's an engineered virus made by the chinese to deal with their elderly problem. 20% of the world population lives in China. Imagine how many old, unproductive geezers they have (had)

I just bought a lot of water, jelly, peanut butter and crackers. I think I’m good.

Just buy stuff you're going to eat anyway, like

1. Pasta
2. More Pasta because I like Pasta
3. Frozen chicken and pollock is bretty good if you have a freezer

>tfw don't even have vidya to play

Could have made it more lethal if that was the case desu

That's not remotely how it works dude, illegitimate use of emergency services attracts a fucking massive fine.

>economic downturn
should i invest now then?

Why won't my uni close down already? I've been in self-quarantine for 2 weeks now but the fuckers demand that I go to a class on thursday.

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>Yeah, you will be in debt, you're just not noticing this debt because you already paid it in taxes.

Really a smooth brain here.
Get off the American propaganda machine pls

>is it true that trump has the coronas?
He shook hands with someone at CPAC who had recent contact with an infected person, so there's a decent chance he does have it.

>was this all planned from the start to get him infected and out of the picture?
Planned by God, maybe. Because if he does get it, he's fucked. He has all the traits that make the virus turn lethal. But he'll blame it on the Democrats, like he does with everything else.

>There's no harm in FOR ONCE IN THE HISTORY OF OUR STUPID RACE taking precaution, is there?
Of course there's harm in it! If it gets bad, the stock market will go down! THE STOCK MARKET! And that might hurt Trump's re-election chances! We can't have that, so we better not acknowledge the problem!

>Trump says it's less harmful than the flu
Trump is literally incapable of speaking without lying.

They're not all bad. My parents are boomers, and they're okay. But a ton of them are assholes who are also Trump supporters. So he and his supporters might both be wiped out by this.

A 3 day emergency stay in a hospital is actually $100000 in the US. Not even kidding

>Emergency bunker stocked with snacks and vidya
>Get to work from for 2 weeks
>Corona ensuring I get my pension one day
HOLY BASED

yeah there is a walk in fee and it costs a fuck ton
with my insurance plan, i have to pay the first $3,000 all myself but everything after that is completly covered
i still think insurance is a scam and i keep telling my dad i dont need it now if i never go to checkups or the doctors or anything health related anymore and i dont need any pills, he always says BUT WHAT IF
its like im throwing away money every week

most of the old people in the world are white

>mostly kills boomers and generally unhealthy people
>most cases are so mild most people don't even bother going to the hospital, heavily inflating the death rate
>but muh overwhelmed hospitals
Around 600,000 flu cases in the US alone are critical and you don't see hospitals breaking down
>but muh markets
Markets were starting to correct before the Saudis started throwing a tantrum

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I was thinking that too. Sure, that lethality for old timers isn't anything to sneeze at (hoyhoyhoyhoy), but it's still not THAT bad. Keep your parents safe, of course, but it's not a death sentence.

Non-Americans living in America already do this.

I can't believe Italy, the pinnacle of human ingenuity, is in fucking lockdown because of batflesh. This is the closest we've ever come to the feel of an apocalypse I think.

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>tfw in a complete lockdown country

I just want to go to uni to study frankly, not all my courses do videolessons and it bothers

It is pretty chill to play fire emblem all day though

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Americans seething

faggot

Ya'll know who's to blame and what you have to do to stop it

Can we just start living life like this? I didn't like any of you that very much any ways.

You've never been to Italy have you?

>people still buying the party line that this is a virus you recover from and develop immunity to
This is effectively airborne HIV. You will not recover, you will get sicker and sicker with every cycle until you die. A cure will not be developed in time, the only hope you have is to not get sick in the first place, which means the only people safe from this live in the middle of nowhere and are self-sufficient.

HE CAN'T KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH IT!

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>Trump is literally incapable of speaking without lying
Yessir, I was merely joking. I never really had any major issues with him until now but his handling of this pandemic is fucking abhorrent. And then putting Mike "Pray The AIDS Away" Pence in charge of everything. I couldn't fucking write a scenario this awful if I fucking tried.

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The death rate for all ages will be up there with the boomers when people can't get put on a ventilator, the virus fucks up a significant portion of people's lungs at all ages, those numbers are representative of the death rate before hospitals are overflowing.

I haven't gone in to work in like a month. Maybe longer. All because I feel suicidal and going to work makes it worse.

hope you get paid vacation time lol, sucks you have to use it this early in the year
most people will just dismiss it as having a cold at first anyway
if my work told people to stay home for 2 weeks if the coughed or blew their nose, we would be out of business

Hello spaghettianon

Aaahhhhhh I don't wanna go to work and instead want to stay in and play vidya all day but there's no corona-chan in my area. FUCK. Also I don't get paid if I don't work so that's taht.

People in politics cannot tell the truth.
Everybody knew this shit.
Why oh why, do I have to be just old enough to tell you fuckers this? They will never tell the truth. Never, ever, ever.

Chinese have an elderly problem? Is their healthcare good enough and fertility bad enough to warrant this?

>just the flu bro

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Dude wtf

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How haven't you been fired for missing so much work?

This but going to uni courses but also my brain tells me I'm doing it as an excuse to get out of class and I should withdraw.

The only thing that keeps me interested in work is thinking about what games I can buy next

A global pandemic is the only situation where non nationalized healthcare is a good thing, you're less likely to die waiting if you have an actual cost lowering demand. Imagine dying in the ER while some nigger is having his herpes checked out.

They have an aunt problem. There are literally women who go out and do dance moves in public squares, in the middle of the night, and there is fucking nothing you can do about it. I mean fucking, nothing. I promise you, they are part of what spread this.

Undermining the people's trust in them will have far more dire consequences than trying to save their own skins.

That's some nice art. Is it from a game?

>be Italian living in Northern Italy
>be quarantined
>be disregarding it, fleeing to the south en masse
>be now in complete country lockdown
Why are Italians so fucking brainless?

if it killed all boomers, then all the neets would have nowhere to live since even working full time, i cant even afford to live in a $500 a month apartment (one room, one bathroom) without it taking away like 80% of my income

Looks like monster hunter

It's a good question, and one that I've asked myself many times.

>Work in IT
>Usually do jack shit because I know my job and stuff runs smoothly
>Planned two weeks of holidays
>"Hey user, you gotta cancel your holidays and come in to make sure those 400 potentially infected people can work from home, please test their VPN connection with them"
>mfw
I WAS MEANT TO FARM SAFI'JIIVA YOU FUCK

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Honestly the part that pisses me off the most is that China will skate scott-free once this dies down. There's no way companies won't go right back to using cheap labor.
Putting the whole world in danger, thousands dead. And nothing will change.

I'm all for it then.

Based pasta poster

should have took online classes lol

Monster Hunter, monster is Gore Magala

Where do you work? 99% of people near me are still going to work.

Got any sources on that?

Not to mention the economy tanking like in 2008

>A global pandemic is the only situation where non nationalized healthcare is a good thing
No, nationalized healthcare is a good thing then, too.

Oh yes. The wet markets will open up and expand in just a few months so Chang can have his bat soup. They didn't learn from SARS, they won't learn from this and when we're all 60, they will start another pandemic and at that point we'll die from it.

Hello from pastaland, now with viruses.
Honestly i’m not really worried for myself, even though my mom works in an hospital and is pretty damn close to infected people.
I’m worried for my grandparents cause they are the only good boomers I ever met, I don’t want to infect them and kill them.

How exactly does this prove me wrong?

If all the boomers died then rent prices would probably drop a lot lower so even someone working an entry level job could afford something.

literally me, except that I'm living off my parents and blowing my money on anime figurines and videogames

Thanks, anons.

>virus has a 2% mortality rate
>what if we show people pictures of the 2% that died, that'll teach them

Are you italian?

In China they probably euthanize the elderly that show up and under report the numbers

Sounds good, could use some culling given humans dont have a natural predator

>decrepit old fucks start dying en masse
>lots of houses and apartments freeing up
>with much more housing to sell/rent, real estate owners have to compete with each others for customers, lowering the price
At least how I hope it would go down

I already forgot that it spread because chinks are subhumans that eat bats and shiet. why are chinese like this? JUST FUCKING STOP ACTING LIKE AN INSECTOID AND BEHAVE MORE HUMAN LIKE

Insurance is so fucked up in the US it's beyond belief. You pay out the ass to get nothing in return, and if you don't have it (you aren't employed by a big company, which is more people than just the po ol' black man like the news would have you believe) it's deceptively difficult to get.

What's even more fucked is that the grand alternative, universal healthcare, doesn't even solve these problems but rather sweeps them under the rug. We're beyond fucked.

You realize that hospitals triage patients based on how urgent the needed care is, right? It's not just the first person who shows up is the first to get taken care of.

Also permanently damages your respiratory system, your balls and once you've had it you can catch it again.

That sounds fucking scary. Imagine an old lady in the park dancing in the middle of the night. Gives me chills.

Do you know how triage works? If you're actually legit about to die, then they bump you up. Not like all the retarded cases of headaches and coughs I see waiting for hours every time I go in for work.

>Months later people are still debating whether or not this virus is a serious threat
You would have known for sure within the first month and wouldn't need to have this debate in the first place, if it were a serious threat

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>buying anything requiring cooking

post lungs

even the americans disregard the quarentine and end up goint to events without weraing a mask and acting like nothing is wrong
to a certain extent, "you will probably end up getting it anyway" is SORT OF true in the same way that you try living the rest of your life without ever having a common cold ever again since America seems to be doing jack shit for quarentines and lock downs. hell my local newspaper even reports that people are saying that life will go on as normal even if people get it in our small towns

It's a dilemma though, because if the WHAT IF happens you're ruined

Most cases dont require a violator or hospitalization though

This isn't good if our scientists haven't placed real quarantines against it. I take nothing seriously until my scientific community does. This is not good. This isn't like a fever-break, like a flu. This is different.

>only have 3 weeks of annual leave, 2 weeks paid sick leave available saved up
how bads this shit gonna be? how long will this last

What are those pastafuckers doing?

>bats and shiet

Literally. Covid-19 came from a bat which had ingested the shit of a different animal, and the shit was in its stomach as it was consumed. Clearly we can't stop the chinamen from enjoying such delicious luxuries of life.

And it's not the poor either; the people who eat this are the rich elite of china, which is why it won't go away.

this

I doubt 95% of Yas Forums realises how bad this will be
youtube.com/watch?v=3etuaYTDwFI

better get your tendies now before the shops are closed!