/cvg/ - Corona Virus General #3537

Guys . . . I have to go to the bank tomorrow.

I don't have a proper mask or gloves :(

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In the U.K., soldiers are standing by to assist with “protecting possible quarantine zones,” or to “cope with the breakdown of civil society.” Israel is tapping its formerly secret collection of everyone’s mobile phone records to identify people who might be infected, and assorted “others who need to be quarantined."

Macron (now relieved of his Gilets Jaunes problem!) is ready to “rule by decree” if necessary. California is “prepared to enact martial law.” The U.S. military is “prepared to deploy in support of potential extraordinary missions,” including “quelling civil disturbances.”

The U.S. Department of Justice is asking Congress for the power to detain people indefinitely. The British Parliament is on the brink of passing an emergency “Coronavirus Bill” that will (among other unsettling provisions) grant authorities the power to arrest and indefinitely quarantine anyone they deem a “potentially infectious person” … or, in other words, pretty much anyone they want.

As if that wasn’t dystopian enough, according to a report in Politico:

Counter-terrorism troops have been redeployed across Italy to beef up police forces throughout Italian cities. Patrol cars are now circulating in every major city in Italy with a monotone male voice warning citizens over a loudspeaker not to leave their residences or risk a ticket. ‘GO BACK INTO YOUR HOMES,’ the voice warns.”

But wait, it gets even better than that. In Missouri, prosecutors have charged an idiot who licked some items at Walmart as a “terrorist.” I kid you not, a Coronavirus Terrorist.

>Post your greyman mode
Pic related. Peak greyman.

The point is, the global capitalist empire (for whatever reasons, real or imagined) has turned on the MINDLESS HYSTERIA machine, and dialed it up as high as it goes. People are in full-blown headless chicken mode. No one (or hardly anyone) is thinking, or listening to dissenting opinions, or paying attention to official statistics, or common sense, or anything else that contradicts the War on Death narrative.

The British tabloids are publishing horror stories about “doctors” standing by and helplessly watching as patients slowly suffocate to death. According to such stories, not only are these “doctors” unable to treat roughly 400 patients with any of the UK’s over 8,000 ventilators, but, apparently, patients whose hearts have stopped (and who are therefore unconscious) are also now capable of “dying in agony” with “terror in their eyes.”

According to The New York Times, the Coronapocalypse has begun in Elmhurst, where the authorities have called in the refrigerator trucks to haul away the mountains of corpses, after 13 people who “had tested positive” died (of something) in the course of one day.

The rest of the corporate media are running moment-by-moment deathometer updates, apocalyptic prognostications of the millions or billions who are possibly going to die, and of course the latest on which celebrities have been infected and are clinging to life, or experiencing mild, cold-like symptoms, or absolutely no symptoms whatsoever.

Greta suspects she might have been infected! Prince Charles! Colton Underwood (whoever that is), Tom Hanks, and even Idris Elba! Just the other night, celebrated playwright Terrence McNally (who was 81, and had a history of lung cancer and COPD) was struck down in the prime of his life!

There's already 500,000 dead bare minimum, that's an extremely conservative estimate. We're probably at several million

Jews literally everywhere in Manhattan.
youtube.com/watch?v=4QJmExSMz28

Pic related is the type of burger this happening is.

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In short, the authorities have whipped the masses into an orgy of shrieking, white-eyed FEAR of this new, evil, “invisible enemy” that is coming to kill them and their families. Millions of people (now confined in their homes) have taken to the Internet to pump up the hysteria, share totally un-sourced personal accounts of the horrors their therapists’ accountants’ doctors have personally witnessed on the war’s “front lines,” and hunt down any infected persons, or potentially infected persons (or otherwise uncooperative persons) who might have gone outside for some air.

So, that’s the good news for you authoritarians! For the rest of us … yeah, not so good.

Oh, I almost forgot the bad news. The bad news is … well, the bad news is Death. The bad news is, you are going to die. I’m going to die. We are all going to die. All of us. We are going to die. We are going to die of … well, something. Cancer. A heart attack. A stroke. The flu. Diabetes. Alzheimer’s disease. Possibly a coronavirus. Maybe even this coronavirus.

In fact, a lot of us are dying right now, according to the Internet, around a hundred per minute … which, it goes without saying, is unacceptable, and a tragedy, and something we need to take drastic action to prevent at all costs.

We can’t let these Russian dissension sowers, neo-Nazi accelerationists, and coronavirus-sympathizers confuse us. They want to convince us that Death is, yes, scary, and sad, but inevitable, and natural. How utterly heartless and insane is that?!

No, we need to close our minds to that nonsense. People are dying! This is not normal! Death is our enemy! We have to defeat it! We need to hunt down and neutralize Death! Root it out if its hidey hole and hang it like we did with Saddam!

Probably not until Sunday, unless someone drops another bomb like what the UK did yesterday.

I’m not kidding. There is a war on, people! GloboCap is taking the gloves off again. (You remember what happens when the gloves come off, don’t you?) So get your mind right and get with the program or get ready to face the consequences.

Relax, I’m not referring to all these tanks (2:34 in the NBC video). I’m referring to other consequences. I am not some crazy conspiracy theorist. Plus, Los Angeles Mayor Eric Garcetti has assured us there’s no cause for concern:

“If and when National Guard or military units are deployed to the streets of L.A., trust me, I’ll let you know.”

See? Everything is perfectly fine. No one is preparing for martial law. Those tanks just returned from the Middle East and are “being sent back home to Texas.” This kind of thing happens all the time. It has nothing to do with the global lockdown.

I don’t know about you, but I’m extremely relieved … for a moment there I thought we were in trouble.

off-guardian.org/2020/03/27/the-war-on-death/

Go home Schlomo Bergstein, yer droonk.

>Dozens of Decomposing Bodies Found Trucks
So this their takeout? Weird

I’d just about PISS Coors if I could! How do you like that, Happy Crappy?

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I have to go back to work next monday
Will this respirator protect me?

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I'm starting a nofap on May 1 at midnight. You should join me.

You got enough filters for every fucking work day?

as long as someone doesntcoof to your face or general direction , or in a closed enviroment , yes.
and wear swimming goggles

or, am i.....

diversityoftactics.org/2020/04/23/covid-19-the-discourse-of-safety-and-the-exploitation-of-trauma/

off-guardian.org/2020/04/23/why-you-cant-trust-the-uks-daily-covid19-updates/

off-guardian.org/2020/04/05/covid19-death-figures-a-substantial-over-estimate/

off-guardian.org/2020/04/27/coronavirus-fact-check-4-why-are-so-many-healthcare-workers-dying/

off-guardian.org/2020/03/23/italy-only-12-of-covid19-deaths-list-covid19-as-cause/

No Ford already said it's unlikely things will reopen by the 30th of May

Doctors btfo

Vegas is set to reopen mid way.
YAY MAYDAY.

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Uk anons, has Scotland upped their game yet? picrel

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IT WAS A NOTHING BURGER ALL ALONE
FUCK YOU /cvg/ I HAVE TO GET A JOB NOW

what about ear protection?

why is the argie boomer yellow?

I've been greymode for years and I can't even tell. Is he the OG?

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filtered

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YEAH VERY MATURE

Are boomers really going to flock to Vegas to play slots? Well maybe some but I can't imagine they do much business at least right away.

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wtf man

Do not question WHO or you will be banned from Youtube. Even when WHO is clearly not working in the best interest of the world.

I'm committed to retaining my precious bodily fluids. Are you? My problem is that when I make love with my woman, she seeks my essence. It will be hard to deny her my essence, but it must be done. We shall fornicate, but I must refrain and must retain my precious bodily fluids!

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The war won't be against Death.
If anything, the war will be against life.

/cvg/ may be filled with shills, but it somehow manages to be filled with less shills than the entire board, why is that?

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just try to get the 6ft between you and someone else. Make it a big deal if you can't or people won't cooperate.

50 bucks a week isn't that big of a burden, bro
Masks are mandatory now anyway
we're supposed to wear ear plugs already

I still remember Tedros being mad about Sweden, as well as everyone. Now suddenly we're the greatest, like what?

Didn't you say you'd stop being a cocktease about your drop until you had proof while remaining quasi-anonymous?

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eh , ive heard that as long as you dont mess with that hole and have no open wound , with a shower you should be good , and proper " dont touch your fucking face" practice , because the earwax acts as a natural reservoir

It's trump

Remember user only rain water or pure grain alcohol and deny her your essence.
Fuck the commies

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Boop poster keeps them away.

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sweden kill

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They clearly saw they were having the opposite effect of their intentions and began to falter and give up.

just filter them

Asking again for a second opinion: how much would it cost for me to build a small cabin? I have some land and some money.

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I also said I had 3 hours of work left and I'll be posting during that, I leave work in 20 minuter so.

REMINDER:

FUCK Dr. FUCKY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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They that shit in Ice Cream, Ice Cream!. And the timing of it was all too convenient, right after the second world war. They put it in everywhere

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In canada?

$10 quadrillion dollars

Oh yeah. Well we're all waiting with baited breath. Don't get comp'd

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May Day is false flag day. Which will result in a gun grab push. Coms intercepted from Barrens chat

>because the earwax acts as a natural reservoir
I have none. I use q-tips twice a day. I also ocd floss after every single time I eat something. Eat a handful of potato chips? I have to floss. A strawberry? I floss. I have to. I can't not.

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I appreciate a good balance of shilling and reality.

It's more to appease the boomer locals.
There's mixed reports that They will use thermo-imaging to detect fevers and that they will put plexiglass between slot machines, social distancing. No smoking.
Nevada deserves the spike in coofers.

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Hang on, I thought the South Korea test and trace method was the model recommended by the WHO?

Prepare to wait at least a week I would guess, hopefully quicker if I manage to get access to more of the IT system here.

ok , ive been out of social media and shit due to mourning depression , but this shit needs to be shared

Wear a long sleeve. When pushing buttons put sleeve over fingers. Go at night time. If you have to talk to a banker make sure it is necessary

To add to this, If I eat something like a strawberry, I am careful to only chew on one side of my mouth, and with certain teeth, so I don't have to do a full floss. I have found ways to cheat my ocd.

I don't think we'll see that under Trump.

I have to cash a check :[ has to be daytime

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Thank you Kek & Corona-Chan!!!!!!

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how doable is making a food dehydrator? just want a DIY project for my boredom

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>put sleeve over fingers
Bruh, read this.

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