What if you got taken in by the FBI or some shit and had to explain every post you've ever made

What if you got taken in by the FBI or some shit and had to explain every post you've ever made

Attached: Screenshot_2020-04-22-07-41-36~2.png (712x472, 315.48K)

I'd have a few questions for them myself.

I can’t even remember something I posted five minutes ago

Explain everything and ask if I can be recruited.

"I like anime and hate Jews. That was probably self-evident. That blogpost about killing my ex on November 11, 2014 in Denver, Colorado was a joke".

Attached: 1586219639978.jpg (850x832, 182.9K)

I'd ask them if I can work for them if they see i'm alright.

"I was only pretending to be retarded."

"Oh, thank goodness, user. We were worried you might need help or may hurt yourself, but you'd never hurt a fly. Your posts were pretty based. I'd def be your fren."

Imagine getting paid $80,000 a year to browse Yas Forums, sounds like heaven.

I can't even remember what I'm going to post in 5 minutes.

This i wanna get paid to shitpost and get paid for spreading US propaganda

>being taken alive

Attached: batman.joker-nicholson-laugh.gif (400x298, 1.25M)

just repeat the header on Yas Forums at them and accuse them of being fools.

I would give them the finger and ask to talk to my lawyer

>user, here's how we will compensate you
>1 thread on /k/ = $50
>1 thread on /lgbt/ = $100
>1 thread on /bant/ = $250
>1 thread on Yas Forums = $500
>Do you accept the offer?

>"You can't scare me with this Gestapo crap"

Attached: etwserrtf.jpg (408x511, 14.74K)

Id tell them I voted for Hillary so they would buy me lunch and send me on my way.

The only answer

purely satirical and a social experiment

Explain I'm much more interested in the pursuit of the what-if rather than the as-is, and that my posts are merely hypothetical shitposting and not strongly held beliefs

My name is Schlomo Goldstein and I am an Senior JIDF Operative, you will release me at this moment or you will be hearing from my rabbi.

bant threads? they couldn't pay me enough

They came to visit me last year. I told them to fuck off. NEVER talk to the Feds.

Explain everything at that point.

"I have a sexual fetish for making anonymous posts which I strongly disagree with."

They wouldn't even ask questions because none would be left.

Checked, what did you do?

This. All of my posting is stream of consciousness. I don't even know what I'm going to say until it's already up on the screen and I hit Post.

Attached: 500px-Tzeentch_the_Architect_of_Fate (2).jpg (500x545, 45.39K)

>Bill of Rights

If you've done nothing wrong, you have nothing to fear.

Say nothing, request a Jewish lawyer.

Always plead the 5th. Feds can arrest for lying.

>Checked, what did you do?
I know a lot of shit and talk a lot of shit. They didn't like that. Pretty sure the ADL sent them.

Id ask them to make a chart of my nigger hate posts. I need to visualise it

taken in for questions? they wouldnt do that because then youd be granted a lawyer. they will most likely ask questions at your door butnifnyou answer with a weapon they will fuck right the hell out of there. they send desk workers not the best and brightest. also satire and funny etc etc

I'd plead the fifth and contact a lawyer.

Attached: 1587303919551m.jpg (1024x768, 116.18K)

Snitches get stitches

TOUNGE
MY
ANUS

I'd tell them nigger faggots to go fuck themselves.

Post Yas Forums, nothing looks like heaven.

What kinda shit?

Typical pollack talk the good shit then start stuttering in minecraft in person

IM ASKING THE QUESTIONS HERE

Attached: cbd.jpg (600x546, 25.31K)

>"What exactly would you like to discuss first agent? My Yas Forums posts or /d/horses."

What use is an asshole, if you are unable to shit?

Mean things about Jews user.

Attached: 2b104e245104cb87f4eba14ffec91568a08848f3_hq.jpg (1024x576, 31.5K)

>have own nuclear arsenal
look at me. I'm the FBI now.

Attached: fat kim jong un smiling.jpg (1000x500, 36.91K)

Sure. Any user with two brain cells to rub together will recognize a shill/slide thread, and act accordingly.

I don't know

Mean is all there is to them.

I would be very happy that someone else enjoys my hobbies and ask them to be my fren.

Who?

Easy
Make them read them ALL aloud back to me while I laugh at em

Kek this

You seem like a very nice person.

Nigs, jannies , trannies, kikes , faggots, beaners , bugs, poos , etc
journo scum
globalist scum

This is why people call americans stupid.

95% of them are shitposts. 5% are about how great Hitler was.

The answer to every question will be "Lawyer."

>knee-jerk US hatred, as taught by the media
You don't say...

>taken in

already have my plan.

Don't be jealous that I am one with the chaos and can swim through the sea of piss to find all of the tasty back channels of piss you never even knew existed.

I'd ask for Saul Goodman.