Is anybody else’s city just out of toilet paper?

I’m not even kidding, we’re straight up out. I was bragging like an asshole that I’d accidentally just bought a bunch just before the quarantine hit, but it’s like 2 weeks in and we’re getting low

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I see a few rolls here and there. Nothing very reassuring. Still mostly WIPED off the shelves.

Yeah it's an absolute travesty. I bought 2 packs of 48 the day the NBA got cancelled and I'm almost out. I'm going to have to switch to paper towels and toss them in the trash can.

acetone is suddenly sold out

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None to be found in LA
Where they are geting them, they're only getting in 4 packs and they have signs up saying limit 1 per customer.
I smuggled in an illegal shower massage (they're banned in California), so I've been stepping into the tub and using that to spray out the shit. My only problem is now I have a slow drain and a wicked infestation of drain flies.

I know this post’s a joke, but I just bought the last two four packs they had from the gas station because they were the only place in town that had any. If you can buy it on the internet still I’m not aware of it

Now you won't be able to do your nails!

Ebay has it for like $10 a roll.

>2 weeks in and we’re getting low.
Nigger how? I accidentally bought an extra pack when I already had one back in early February and I’ll be good until next year. You must use half the roll to wipe your ass.

>illegal shower massage
Why the hell are those banned in California? What the goddamn hell.

>TATP has been used in bomb and suicide attacks and in improvised explosive devices, including the London bombings on 7 July 2005, where four suicide bombers killed 52 people and injured more than 700.[37][38][39][40] It was one of the explosives used by the "shoe bomber" Richard Reid[41][42][40] in his 2001 failed shoe bomb attempt and was used by the suicide bombers in the November 2015 Paris attacks,[43] 2016 Brussels bombings,[44] Manchester Arena bombing, June 2017 Brussels attack,[45] Parsons Green bombing,[46] the Surabaya bombings,[47] and the 2019 Sri Lanka Easter bombings.[48][49] Hong Kong police claim to have found 2 kg (4.4 lb) of TATP among weapons and protest materials in July 2019, when mass protests were taking place against a proposed law allowing extradition to mainland China.[50]

Shut the fuck up, really? It’s like the new currency. Amazon still has that gross ass 1 ply see through shit, and I’ll be honest- I’m half way to pulling the trigger on stocking up on that just to be safe

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Water rules. A shower head has to be 1.2 gpm or less. A standard showerhead is 2.5 gpm.

I have one roll left!!

Why do you live in LA?

It used to not suck as much, I promise.

midwestfag here.. it's like the stores stopped ordering all together... empty shelves for 2 weeks now and no sign at all of restock... asked cashier kid about next truck and he got all wiggy and weird about it, like he's been told it ain't coming anymoar

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unfortunately all the stores having a limit of 1 per customer doesn't stop retarded boomers from just going every day and getting a pack

Where? Shit isn't that a you know what making material?

On the bright side, if you live through this you can tell your grandchildren how you survived the toilet paper crisis of 2020.

Some of us have to live here for work, you know in "the biz."

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A TOILET PAPER CARDBOARD CENTER JUST FLEW OVER MY HOUSE!

>bragging that I bought a bunch on accident prior
Shut the fuck up you lying faggot. You heard that someone else from someone else and you thought Yas Forums would give a shit

Wait until gas is so cheap the refineries go out of business. We all going neanderthal up in here.

It's not a joke. I don't live by myself, my girlfriend and her son lives with me.

central oregon, we've been out for about 3 weeks now. i just bought a bidet, fuck it

no pun intended! LOLOL

Step 1: don’t live in an area full of niggers who raid stores for toilet paper for no reason
Step 2: clean your ass

You people laugh now, but TP hoarders will be the KINGS of post-apocalyptic life. They thought ahead, they planned, and you didn't. Here's a quick scenario for you:
>13 months from now, after corona has killed off 75% of the US
>stores are empty, the dead just lay in the streets because no one will pick them up
>you ran out of supplies weeks ago, have to shit
>local TP Czar has taken over the largest house and rules all the lands for miles
>people pay fealty to the toilet paper Lord
>tributes of food, medicine, and their own daughters and wives to appease him
>you have nothing, but you still have needs. You hope the Lord will be merciful
>you head out to his palace, surrounded by 24/7 armed guards
>the guards strip you nearly naked, checking for anything of value
>then they escort you to the "throne" room
>there he sits, cool, calm, and collected. He has no issues emptying his bowels at any time
>a throne of TP, adorned with canned food, bottled water, and naked women
>you clench your cheeks and kneel before him
>"Speak, peasant" he commands, his voice booming and healthy. You know he dropped logs off today
>"P-please... My Lord... I need a roll... I don't have much to offer but I promise I will repay you somehow" you manage to squeak out
>"Oh, I'm sure we'll find something for you to do." The TP Czar chuckles. His guards chuckle. His concubines chuckle. Your face stings and your stomach hurts
>he picks up a small, half used roll of TP. Spits on it, then throws it on the ground before you.
>"T-thank you your majesty... Thank you!" You say, scooping up the TP
>"Do not forget the debt you now owe." The TP ruler says as you rush out of his palace. You feel as though you've just sold your soul, and that may be true, but at least you can go on living for a few more days

fake and gay

Honestly you people laugh at toilet paper hoarders, but you really don't have enough toilet paper yourselves. The average person uses 7 rolls per day. If you have a family of 21, that's 603 rolls a week. Over 8459 a month. TP rolls will be worth their weight in gold in a few months, because everyone needs it

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I’m in the Midwest too, and I showed up at giant eagle the other day literally as they opened, and obviously they were wiped, but I asked a girl working there “Hey, so I don’t suppose you know when you’ll be getting any more charmin in, do you?” she literally laughed in my face. It wasn’t even a mean laugh like she thought I was stupid, it was like a knowing laugh as in “buddy, we both know you just said the craziest thing in the world!” as if I was making a joke

Why did the toilet paper cross the road?

It was on a roll

Why didn’t the toilet paper cross the road?

It was stuck in a crack

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how much TP do people use?
I use 9-18 squares per shit
A roll lasts me at least 2 weeks

technique:
take 3 contigous squares, fold over, fold over again.
that provides adequate thickness to wipe.
wipe 3-6 times as necessary
worst case, I can us a single 3 square application and finish off in the shower.

>inb4 chad TP wad, virgin fold

Ayy lmao.
>i dont even have to post infographics anymore because the information is literally everywhere

ayyyy lmao

>ultra soft
What a faggot

See if they're also out of peroxide lol

Pic related

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It's pretty much out of stock in my local supermarkets: so it's not just in the US.

So what's the real reason the shortage is still ongoing?

Hoarder retards still have space in their houses and disposable income left?
Supply chain issues?
Something stopping the TP manufacturers from pumping out more, or they're for some reason just choosing not to?

im so ayy lmao that ill even ayy lmao!

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ok boomer

I am and always have been frugal in every aspect of my life except two I allow myself to splurge on: 1) Food. I like to eat healthy and well, and I prioritize it over all else. 2) Toilet paper. It makes a BIG difference in quality of life if you’re using cheap toilet paper, and I don’t skimp

why didn't you stock up 2 months ago Yas Forums had threads

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i'm pretty sure they are deliberately creating the toilet paper scarcity to keep a sense of panic and shortage.

in reality the toilet paper would be in surplus at this point to meet demand.

I know they are out of both peroxide and alchool on East Coast. That's why I wanted to know where is out of acetone!!!

How much is "a bunch"? Living alone, I use about a roll a month, and all this public talk about how much toilet paper people use has me very confused about how much toilet paper households manage to consume

Yas Forums always has people insisting everyone should be stocking up on shit

Completely out of TP in a 100 mile radius. Had a shop get in a truckload and there was a line of 200 people just to get 1 4-pack each. I just shower after I shit now and stomp any excess poo down the drain.

Women go through like 2 rolls a day. They completely pat down their vag with hundreds of sheets every time they pee. Never get married.

make sure you chew your vegetables well lol

We were. All back in stock now though everywhere.

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It has to be something like this going on. How can there be an ongoing shortage for weeks of something as basic as toilet paper.

Hoarders buy it up and cause a shortage. Demand goes up, but restocking takes time. Once a store gets a supply, people buy more than what they need because they saw the shortage and are freaked out. Shortage continues, panic continues, more hoarders are created. Soon, the general public starts changing. They no longer walk with a stride and instead shuffle their feet. Part of this is because of the hopeless despair of the overblown virus. Part of this is because their cracks are caked in shit. Social distancing now occurs naturally because nobody can stand the smell of one another. Masks are replaced with nose plugs. The system has succeeded.

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CHIMPCAGO here
every fucking Costco in proximity has loadsepaper
Limit 1 per customer but you can go back the next day and restock for neighbors
>suckers

all stores near me have tp; it is the sanitizer wipes, alcohol, and bleach that are scarce

go all corn diet guys no wipe needed

What? Cant make it in the big city? If you can make it there you can make it anywhere

and Yas Forums is always right why didn't you stock up

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Got one that goes under seat and retracts out.

I have a mega pack I'm currently just hoarding. Went to hardware store when I noticed toilet paper disappearing rapidly. Bought a bucket, dowel, and tshirt cloth for painting. I cut up cloth to small squares, filled bucket with water and a little bleach, and left dowel near it. The bidet gets asshole so clean there's no poo. A week of checking and no poo. None.

So I use cloth to dry water and check. Dispose in bucket o bleach water, if it doesnt sink I jam it under water with dowel. One a week you drain, dump in wash and your good.

I may never go back to toilet paper honestly.

Where do you live generally?