Termed

I'll be alive until I cant work while I hit the concrete floor for the final time.

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Logging into the big TC 70 in the sky
Right on

Yup, I got "terminated" on Friday...

I got fired on 1 of march.
Hopefully an year of gibs awaits me.

My girlfriend lost her job today, has no saving and can only pay April rent. I still have mine, how do I break it to her softly I don’t want her to move in?

Entire company I work for gets furloughed on the 1st.

Why not? You don't want the idyllic 1950s "Hey Honey, I'm home" exclaimed while you're still wearing your coat and top hat?

>girlfriend in desperate need
>gets to play protector and provider
>nah dont wanna do that
Just break up with her, you're obviously just using her for her holes

I got laid off a month before the corona crisis because my company fucked up their finances and had to make a bunch of people redundant. I'm not complaining tho cause I kinda wanted to quit for some time anyways but now they gave me a pretty nice severance package and I have enough savings to last me for a couple of years, even with zero income. Also got on unemployment neetbucks, which aren't much but it's better than nothing.
I'm currently just chilling and casually working on some projects and a bit of self-improvement/training. It's not like I can even look for a job rn, because the whole country is on pause and nothing is happening.

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>how do I break it to her softly I don’t want her to move in?
Change your locks and then when she tries to get in call up local law enforcement and say she has SARS-CoV-2 and is trying to infect people with it so they can know to swing by and take her to the FEMA camps.

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Not me, I got a pay rise. Glory to our NHS and our key workers.

I can't even sign up for unemployment because I was laid off and took the maximum 6 month pay a year ago and now online doesn't allow me to renew

and guess what my city went on lockdown the day after I started a new job for once

so now I'm fucked without a job, no pay, and no way to get unemployment because the only way to get it is by calling a number but I've tried calling 20 times in the past 2 weeks every single day and the automated voicemail automatically drops my call because they're getting too many calls

what the fuck can I do in my situation???

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>mfw I’m an essential white collar employee getting paid to be a NEET
Getting paid 6 figures to play video games and fuck my wife 3 times a day is pretty good.

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Werd. I use both my wife’s and girlfriends holes on the reg

>MFW my job is non-essential
>MFW sales for sports orgs
>MFW NHL done
>MFW MLB done
>MFW MLS done
>MFW NBA done
Feels bad man

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If she could cook or clean I’d want that. is right about her use.

>The work I'm doing will save the company many, many times my salary for years to come
>This work must be done by May or they are on the hook for several hundreds of thousands of dollars immediately
>Boss acknowledges my work is absolutely critical to completing this. They have no one else that can do it and finding a replacement would be damn-near impossible
>Said boss also just skipped giving me even a modest raise in this recent review cycle
What would you do, frens?

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You'll get that $1,000 check in a few weeks. That should take care of your bills.

The Greater Depression is going to anally pulverize you.

>May
>he thinks it's ever going away
This is the end of the white middle class, my friend.

quit

haha you will soon discover a hard truth.

threaten to leave

>tfw fired like 2 days before everything went to shit
>tfw can't get unemployment because fired
>tfw everything is closed and no one is hiring

My trumpbux can't come soon enough boys

Seethe harder nigger.

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>tfw set up my job to work remotely from home 2 weeks before mandatory quarantine
Being a drafter rules

>wife isnt complaining or getting sore from 3 times a day sex
>user just started fucking her 3 times a day recently
Yeah if he cant figure it out by now, he is a dumbass

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Wife and I both get raises on April 1st. Fuck you Nonahsenshuls!

this is going to stop real soon

let them burn!
or just be a good monkey and finish your work, expecting to restitutions for your labor and they would literally worship you for the rest of your career.

I am responsible for the hiring of 10 white republican southern californians. Didn't even interview them. Only stipulations were no spics and no coofing.

I applied for neetbux a week ago, was only getting a few days a week driving a truck. Spent friday and all weekend pitting together a production line for hand sanitiser for a guy.. 25 tonne by friday.
Ill just go fishing the rest of the time

I hope this corona shit goes on for months. Not only have I NOT been laid off, I only have to work every other week and still get paid for the weeks I'm off. I'm technically "working from home", but my work can't be done at home, so it's like bonus vacation time.

thank the dems. trump wanted to make memevirus unemployment a federal gib but they forced it to go through the cucked state system

you have to do a bunch of gay shit in my state (Florida). if you are offered a job, no matter how shit, you must accept or you have commited a felony

In PA I think they waived the "looking for job" requirement but it doesn't matter because being terminated for-cause makes you ineligible

>I hope this corona shit goes on for months. Not only have I NOT been laid off, I only have to work every other week and still get paid for the weeks I'm off.
I'm not laid off either, but I think you're crazy if you want this to continue for a long time. Even if you're part of the half of the population who still has an income it'll be a pretty fucking bad time when the other half doesn't have one. That's not a sustainable situation.

I have been on unemployment for about 5 weeks, sure enough the Neetbux law passed just as I got a job offer and may have to start in 2 weeks, now I will only get 2 weeks of the extra unemployment, which is more than the check I will be getting at my new job! Fuck me, I could be collecting 1,000 dollars a week on unemployment if I had not actually tried to get a fucking job!

essential here, we make mattresses for the government, I hate it
I would take unemployment instead, will pay 95%

You'll soon be made redundant, desk jockeys massacre incoming.

>being terminated for-cause makes you ineligible

Nah not always. I got fired and collected.

>because fired
Always always always apply for unemployment anyway. The company has to dispute it and they rarely will. It opens them up for litigation and they will almost always just pay. Serious, bro.

This is true, some states are very pro worker, you can still apply if you got fired for cause, and contest the reason you got fired, most times the state will side with the worker over the company.

The UI boost is insanely awesome. Fuck work - I’m a rich NEET for the next nine months thanks to Drumpf.

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June/July

This. I can live the NEET retard life for a while but what about everyone else

this shit just showed us that if you are able to work from home your job is an absolutely useless meme job that wouldnt even be noticed if it disappeared today.

Time to read up on survivalism before your power shuts off and then head for the mountains

>into may
Yesterday Britain was officially told by #10 that we are locked down for six months and likely longer.
Corona is not dangerous, it is a species ending event which is why we are not treating it like other diseases. It is not ‘like’ disease X it literally is disease X.

Considered essential and don't even have to deal with any other person to do my job. Gonna ride the tide and make good money.

A good number of us have jobs that you wouldn't notice if they disappeared right away, or possibly even for months, but if it were to go on much longer than that, shit would absolutely fall apart in ways you cannot even imagine.

Asked my boomer grandparents for a loan until I get paid from work, this was literally their response.

If they survive this, they are going into one of the worst nursing homes I can find in niggerville.

Internal sabotage.

The overwhelming majority of careers now are just busy work for adults. Like a fucking adult daycare, people need to start demanding better working conditions after this. Just let people work from home, traffic would fucking plummet if most of the desk jockeys could just use a home workstation to do all their pretend work shit.

Leeching of your grandparents, just kys subhuman.

>MFW Shelf Stocker
>MFW 40 hours a week $16 an hour + overtime
>MFW getting huge bonuses back to back
>MFW getting $1200 trumpbux for literally no reason
My my. Feels good to be a winner

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