/cvg/ - Corona Virus General #2617

Our Prime Minister, Health Secretary and Chief Medical Officer all got corona today

For the /herd/

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>CHINA MAN GO BOOOOOM

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>26,447 deaths
more people die from cancer every year.

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>less new deaths per day than threads
>new deaths are slowing down
Was crashing the economy part of your plan?

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Never, we're going to die bro

It's time to make YOUR family

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It's gonna turn into a shitshow, isn't it.

BUT MUH STOCKS!

BUT MUH STOCKS!

BUT MUH STOCKS!

BUT MUH STOCKS!

BUT MUH STOCKS!

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Total societal collapse is inevitable, take the anarcho-primitivism pill before its too late.

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>Oxford says Croatia Implementing Strictest COVID-19 Measures in World

total-croatia-news.com/lifestyle/42423-croatia

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Coronavirus mortality in Bergamo is 0.56%.

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Okay I'm tired of this boomer now

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shit's getting too real for me, i want it to fucking stop

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>all of the scared anons around
No, don't fight it. Stand with god and you will live to see the new era brothers, stand strong, the only enemy here are the CCP and the Semites who funded this.

The people of the west won't die in vain as long as China falls for it's unforgiveable sin. Brothers of Yas Forums, we will prevail.

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It's the end.

BULLS BTFO
BULLS BTFO
THIS IS BOBO'S WORLD

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just a flu, bro

let's get back to work. shareholders are getting sad.

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Hello Chris Chan

DO NOT WANT

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>Poland: If you die at home quarantine, they won't count you as victims of the epidemic
Poland: If you die at home quarantine, they won't count you as victims of the epidemic

LOL they really went and did it!

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For me the correct name is Chinese flu

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Am I also considered Catholic if I've never been baptized? Do I also get the indulgence?

Help

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Is he gonna be okay?

it's gonna peak any second now
aaaaany second now

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>MSM and social media seething over the president
>approval rating sitting around 60%
this whole thing has been amazing to watch. Every single country except maybe South Korea, taiwan, and vietnam completely dropped the ball because they had faith in the WHO and other organizations like the CDC

We had countless examples of China's actions not lining up with what was being reported but they choose to ignore it all and instead pretend it would all be fine. And now they are pointing fingers. Even the fucking europeans are using their last few weeks before shit hits the fan to laugh at America. '

Can you imagine being in a building slowly burning down and spending your time laughing at the roommates whose room burnt down before yours, the whole time while leaving your door wide open and ignoring the smoke pouring in?

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>can anyone find a picture of FSU I partying?

kek

Guys HELP, I just had sex with me gf this morning and last night. Felt fucking great,. It was my first time.
Quick question: what do I do with the condoms? If I flushed them down, I heard they could block the loo. I f I trow them into the garbage my dad might see them?
Btw I really love that quarantine thing, when passed with a hot gf!

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So what pills do I actually take if I get the virus to fight fever? I heard stuff about both Tylenol & Ibuprofen

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I knew this video but this never fails to make me laugh. It's cartoonish.

any report on the ICU/ventilator situation in Italy?

Today was a good day

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CORONA THEME
youtube.com/watch?v=WLLE_PvJ5mY

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Godspeed Corona chan!

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As in 5.6 people died for 1000 inhabitants.

Those tards still believe this, varg fans can all go and eat a fuck bullet now. They claimed they were immune and were planning to "enjoy the cold".

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For the romanians, becuase I wrote it after new thread announcement:

This is only the beginning

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>not Chink Flying AIDS
Meh

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Will US deaths ever over take threads in number?

>almost 1k deaths today in italy....

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You forgot to test for the virus though

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>alert 5909 new cases and 919 new deaths in Italy. Highest number of new deaths since the beginning of the epidemic in Italy [source] [video]. 46 doctors have died to date (with 4 additional deaths today). 6414 health workers have tested positive [source]
source : github.com/pcm-dpc/COVID-19/blob/master/dati-andamento-nazionale/dpc-covid19-ita-andamento-nazionale.csv

Yeah
All these nothingburger going "muh asymptomatic" not getting recorded forget about all the deaths not getting recorded

kek I'm a nothingburger fag myself but it's retardedly stupid to suggest that the economy will recover before late 2021

inb4 he becomes a memory

Ok I think he lurks on Yas Forums

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but everything relevant has already being cancelled/post poned

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you get nothing
need to be baptized

>Ibuprofen
user...

as long as you convert to christianism 2 seconds before dying you are ok

That's not black, it's brown.

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A-are those human parts raining down at the end?

by end of march

Oh no, I love Italia so much ;_;

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LOL
dumb cunts

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based delusional dumbass

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wait it's december already?

the virus has 9 more months to accumulate over a million deaths.

So, Tylenol then?

>It's cartoonish.
Yeah like straight from a Looney Toons Cartoon.

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TUBERCULOSIS BOUTTA GET BLOWN THE FUCK OUT

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I was baptized mormon

LATEST CASES: 36 new deaths in Louisiana.

2 years of flu prison

how many people are going to develop cabin fever

>I want it to stop
thats some gay shit user

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I can't wait for partisan faggots like this to die the fuck off because being concerned is "RAYCISS" or a "hoax by politicians"

Can't call it formally that

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>A-are those human parts raining down at the end?
Yup

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if I get baptized after the stream do I still get the indulgence?

A NATIONALIST dies for his country
A COMMUNIST dies for the emancipation of the proletariat
A CAPITALIST dies for the STOHKS

/herd/life

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>corona chan will kill all the thots
based

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When this fucker is on a ventilator in the ICU, do you still think he'll be in denial?

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I'm glad to be able to watch the building crumble from my 3rd world house of sticks

If these test numbers weren’t high enough people would be dropping dead on the street by now.

qwq rip our pastabros......they are going into the oven al dente

So how long before we see a massive death toll in the U.S.?

Natural selection at work.

It’s time for hugging and handholding!

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why did it have to be italy?
why not england or france?

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>they test the people that died from it

We live in a real world dystopia novel.

How many Italians have died so far today?

this is gonna be the ultimate proof of the real mortality rate of this disease.

If it's 0.5% now, it may well reach 4% by the end. Happening of the century.

>Our government is actually effective
This is truly a clown world

how many old people does Italy have left to die?

Remember when turks were gloating?

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>b-b-but it even outs because people obese people and people with diabetes and hypertension would have died 30 years from now anyway

We cannot predict the peak until one of the European countries reach it. SK might also lie, despite what the nurse on YT says. Their whole government was a fucking cult couple years ago under the influence of a shaman, and they want their economy back worse then Trump

the Varg pill

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Almost 1000

>whites are immune dont worry

Well it does prove that Italians and Spaniards are not white.

Slavs will be the surviving master race.

The first place will be a disputed place soon. EUA, India, Indonesia, Brasil... Bigger populations, more people to die.

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Holy shit that must be what its like to get hit with a Kamehameha irl.

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GOVERMENT OF SPAIN TO RETURN THE 650,000 DEFICIENT TEST KITS BOUGHT FROM CHINA. NOW SPENT 5M€ TO BUY NEW TEST KITS.
>GOVERMENT OF SPAIN TO RETURN THE 650,000 DEFICIENT TEST KITS BOUGHT FROM CHINA. NOW SPENT 5M€ TO BUY NEW TEST KITS.
GOVERMENT OF SPAIN TO RETURN THE 650,000 DEFICIENT TEST KITS BOUGHT FROM CHINA. NOW SPENT 5M€ TO BUY NEW TEST KITS.
>GOVERMENT OF SPAIN TO RETURN THE 650,000 DEFICIENT TEST KITS BOUGHT FROM CHINA. NOW SPENT 5M€ TO BUY NEW TEST KITS.
GOVERMENT OF SPAIN TO RETURN THE 650,000 DEFICIENT TEST KITS BOUGHT FROM CHINA. NOW SPENT 5M€ TO BUY NEW TEST KITS.

>libertaddigital.com/espana/2020-03-27/el-gobierno-devolvera-650000-test-defectuosos-pero-oculta-el-nombre-del-proveedor-1276654836/

ALSO, THE PURCHASE WAS MADE USING A SPANISH COMPANY, WHICH THEY DON'T REVEAL THE NAME TOP FUCKING KEK

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of course he will be

grab the bvlls by the neck

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so long as people die at home, they haven't burdened the healthcare system. the sooner the healthcare system is back to normal, the sooner we can get back to the important business of supporting the extravagant lifestyles of the 1%.

let's get back to work.

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german politicians are already caving to italians and spaniards demanding that we take more debt to save their economies even though the german populace was PROMISED that the german taxpayer will never be forced to pay for the debts of the other EU countries. the argument they use is: "if we dont do this they will probably be mad at us"
WHY ARE WE MEGAKEKS

It's been five months already. Cancer kills more than half a million per year.

>1 in 700 italians are CONFIRMED infected

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Does that mean Bannerlord is delayed again?

A guy in the same house, on the same fucking floor as my auntie, tested positive for corona today. Police and medics in hazmat suits arrived and disinfected the whole building and sprayed some stuff on the walls. My auntie says she doesn't live the flat and is feeling well.
Moscow

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>Normies are all going suicidal from being in their own company for too long

Is this due to their NPC programmed loops?

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969

>So what are you fighting for?
Life... Coronachan is the enemy - The first enemy, and the last.
>But we all get the coof...
Coronachan always wins, and we still need to fight her - that's all I know. You and I won't find much joy while we're shitposting here, but we can keep others alive. We can defend those who can't defend themselves.
>I am the neet that guards the realms of /pol.

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Btw , Brazil user , today Bolsonaro openend the country, did it really open?

How fucking blind do you have to be to drive straight under that truck?

based herdbro

Yes, all that you said but his meltdowns are epic.

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Every country that's gloating about how it won't happen there has it happen there. Gloating is not the correct response; taking extreme preventative measures early is.

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I ask myself this every day.

because italy isnt hiding their numbers
thats illegal
yes, he will blame the ventilator for not defeating his bad cold.

WHO SUMMARY - 27/03/2020

TEDROS
>SOLIDARITY FUND
>+500,000 cases, 20K deaths
>Leaders from G20 addressed : " Fight, unite, ignite "
>G20 cocksucking
>Viral outbreaks are a fact of life
>What should G20 do :
>SAFEGUARD GLOBAL ECONOMY
>ADDRESS GLOBAL TRADE DISRUPTION
>Chronic global shortage of PEEPEE (PPE)
>2 million articles of PPE sent to 74 cunts, to be delivered to 60 more
>SOLIDARITY
>Vaccine is 12-18 months away at least
>Therapuetics needed to treat people
>Norway and Spain patient's are to be enrolled in "SOLIDARITY TRIALS" - 4 meds to be checked (imo this is human testing)
>Dont use drugs that haven't been approved
>openwho.org used to train health workers
>"SOLIDARITY" fund gets 108 million USD in 2 weeks
>Whatsapp app EN has 12 million+ users, multi-langual support to be added
>Crisis like these bring out the best and 'worst'
>Cyber attacks and phishing attacks using COVID and poo in loos name
>WHO apparently has a cyber security team
>"We are only at the beginning of this fight"
>EXCITING NEWS ABOUT SOLIDARITY TRIALS FROM NORWAY
>Solidarity trial's first patient is in Oslo

please wait for pt2 with Q&A

fug you 2bh, you just want everyone to be as miserable as you are

i only just started to get my shit together, and then 2020 happened

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Why is China so full of shit? Only 3,000 dead my fucking ass

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>and I think it's gonna be a long long time

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>over 900 hundred deaths in Italy
huh
Much better

youtube.com/watch?v=r6FVk2k4qsM

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>Pretends to not care about getting the virus for outrage attention
>Gets the virus and gets even more attention by pretending to be a role model

Fuck this world.

>doesn't leave

9,444 HEALTH STAFF INFECTED IN SPAIN, A 75% MORE THAN 3 DAYS AGO
>9,444 HEALTH STAFF INFECTED IN SPAIN, A 75% MORE THAN 3 DAYS AGO
9,444 HEALTH STAFF INFECTED IN SPAIN, A 75% MORE THAN 3 DAYS AGO
>9,444 HEALTH STAFF INFECTED IN SPAIN, A 75% MORE THAN 3 DAYS AGO
9,444 HEALTH STAFF INFECTED IN SPAIN, A 75% MORE THAN 3 DAYS AGO
>9,444 HEALTH STAFF INFECTED IN SPAIN, A 75% MORE THAN 3 DAYS AGO
9,444 HEALTH STAFF INFECTED IN SPAIN, A 75% MORE THAN 3 DAYS AGO
>9,444 HEALTH STAFF INFECTED IN SPAIN, A 75% MORE THAN 3 DAYS AGO
9,444 HEALTH STAFF INFECTED IN SPAIN, A 75% MORE THAN 3 DAYS AGO
>9,444 HEALTH STAFF INFECTED IN SPAIN, A 75% MORE THAN 3 DAYS AGO
9,444 HEALTH STAFF INFECTED IN SPAIN, A 75% MORE THAN 3 DAYS AGO
>9,444 HEALTH STAFF INFECTED IN SPAIN, A 75% MORE THAN 3 DAYS AGO
9,444 HEALTH STAFF INFECTED IN SPAIN, A 75% MORE THAN 3 DAYS AGO
>9,444 HEALTH STAFF INFECTED IN SPAIN, A 75% MORE THAN 3 DAYS AGO
9,444 HEALTH STAFF INFECTED IN SPAIN, A 75% MORE THAN 3 DAYS AGO
>9,444 HEALTH STAFF INFECTED IN SPAIN, A 75% MORE THAN 3 DAYS AGO

>elespanol.com/espana/20200327/drama-sanitarios-contagiados-coronavirus-hace-dias/477952891_0.html
OH NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONOONONONONONO

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On a scale of 1 to 10, how scared are burgers right now? You are the new Italy/Spain in 7-10 days

he's the only adult in the room. the man is a god.

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Best of luck ruski bro

Sharmoota

>How fucking blind do you have to be to drive straight under that truck?
Dude that was straight up SUDOKU

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Best fit exponential for Spain, the last data point was yesterday, the first is when it reached 10.000 cases.

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They just need to hold out 4 more fucking days until they release it. If they dont im going to Constantinopole and stabbing the homeless

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commies

it's been about a month since it started in the west where the numbers are actually more-less properly reported. if china's cases/deaths numbers were as accurate as their recovery rates, the death numbers would already surpassed a few million.

Kek

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hehehehehe, train go boom

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China stronk!

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Noice oc

checked

do you believe that jesus christ is your lord and saviour? if so i herby emergency baptise you
t. catholic

Thank you user for the news

They're only hospitalilzing 10% of 500+ cases in mexico
so far 8 dead let's see how escalates

Same for Germany.

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From that, I deduce she is keen to give titjobs.

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> man
> implying person

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The current state of Chyna

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He reads like a satirical shitpost making fun of PTG

Brazil will win. Just wait.

Flu has already killed way more than 2791 people this season.

people, in general, seem to be taking state governors more seriously than bolso. although rio's governor is following the president, so there commerce has reoppened

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Yeah suddenly goes down as soon as the rest of the world gets it. Bunch of flaming faggot liars

Linking pictures of some dumb desert shitskin who worships a bush? pol in 2020

looks like spain's going to get totally fucked

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We don't want people miserable newfag, we want them dead. We want to pictures of dead bodies on the streets of faggy LA and all the faggy places.

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it's the ancient and secret art of communism, passed by consecutive General Secretary of the CCP

hidden stats jutsu

do u kno da wae

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Correctamundo, user.
You're learning fast Kemosabe.

Tylenol AKA: Paracetamol, Acetaminophen

Why does Iran of all places have such a low death rate? They're faking it, right?

And does NK have no cases after they shot that guy? incredibly based.

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>A-are those human parts raining down at the end?
No, not human, they're just part of that Chinese dude.

>RARE
Everyone was this screeching a month or two ago along with
>ITALIANO ARE NOT WHITERINO

How does Bill come up with such hot takes?

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>4 days
we were so close

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Do you mind posting the formula krautbro?

I don't get why people give Trump and the US shit when you're basically doing the same Germany is doing.

Yeh, they only feel like they exist if they are getting constant validation feedback loops from other NPCs.

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Thanks. I hope she will be alright.

Romania, starting when 100 cases were reached.

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>miserable
keep dreaming
>get your shit together
thats really nice user but after the inevitable societal collapse we can build a new world rid this one of the parasite.

start prepping

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I know, peak is unthinkable nowdays no matter goverments says. This is a serious thinking about the way to stop the virus is what China say: Total lockdown of the low sypmptomatic people and killing and burning the rest. This is unthinkable for a democracy, but shaddy dictatorships can do it.

>We don't want people miserable newfag
they're loved ones will be left grieving

Just tell us the doubling time!