DOW UP BIGLY TWO DAYS IN A ROW! Panic fags BTFO!

where this line is going, we won't need jobs

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I'm afraid not user.

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lol wait till tomorrow

zoom out nigger

You guys might want to look at the DOW right before the Great Depression before you make retarded threads on Yas Forums next time. Hell is coming.

Imagine bragging about this. Imagine being this fucking dumb. ITS NOT GOING AWAY YOU IDIOT DIPSHIT TRUMP CULTIST JEW. GET THE FUCK OVER YOUR 401K

that's what guys said about yesterday on Friday

Unemployment numbers come out tomm. Plus there is uncertainty that the stimulus will pass.

>pumps worthless trillions into bailing out jewish companies
guise we did it
we savved egonomy
line go up

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>the bottom is only 15K

The market goes up, up, up. Meanwhile a loaf of bread will cost $100 if money printer keeps going brrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Yupp jews pumping more cash into the system. and just like that it never happened.

Fuck you. I like my 401k. And right now, today, it is higher than it has ever been.

Tomm when the numbers come out, we are going to have the highest black unemployment ever. Thanks Orange man

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this is how wall street takes advantages of laymen trying to short the market.

You forget that there are people who do this for a living, then you get a market call and your puts get wiped

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next stop 40k and a 1 quadrillion in issued credits and derivatives. OMNEY PRINTER GO BRRRRT LINE GO UP FOREVER.

Please explain user, I just download ribbon hood and I am scared I only got 500 bucks

14 to 17k. Within that three week period. It's a fairly large box.

Stonk goes up at market open and looks like bobos r btfo only for it to crash at like 10-11am eastern.

Who gives a shit about your shekels ?

buy copper

Every major economic indicator is falling like a rock. Stocks skyrocket. Seems legit.

carbs aren't good for you anyway brrrrr brrrrrrrrrrr

Second quarter is a complete bust. Things begin picking up in third quarter.

why stop there? bottom as per last recession is 8k This could be worse since the world is going to be a different place after this virus.

People forget viruses come in waves

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You're a delusional moron if you think this is even close to the bottom.

Put your 500 bucks in either VUG or STFFX. And leave it there until the end of the year.

you were wrong about everything else, so I guess this is the bottom then

you forgot to price in 30 Trillion of QE

One of the major differences will be the fact that people are not going to stay cooped up forever. There is nothing fundamentally wrong with the economy. It's just stalled right now. People will soon come out of their houses looking for something to do. Most of them will go back to work.

I can tell most of you aren't investors Boeing is going bankrupt and they cared the DOW today at the chance they might get bailed out. The last 19 minutes revealed it all.

This is all fake. And all the FED. We aren't at the bottom yet.

>thinks a dead cat bounce can only last a day

This is why Pelosi keeps trying to stop the stimulus, she's an evil cunt that needs to die.

pump n dump just watch

a dead cat bounce, by definition, happens once, you dumb nigger, it doesn't happen 22 times in a month like you are LARPing it does

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Those are retirement funds. Best case scenario OP gains 13% on 500 dollars. Better off just spending in now on the best BJ money can buy

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great argument

I WAS WAITING FOR MY FUCKING SCOMOBUXX REEEEEEEEEE

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Did you get a pic of the DOW -2020?
That was fun.

>great argument
its not an argument, thats what actually happens. Although its a bit more sinister than even the meme can capture.

Umm... why did it go down so sharply at the end?

>its not an argument
yeah because you have no argument against what I said because I'm correct

So much cope in one post.

>a dead cat bounce, by definition, happens once
citation needed

nice bait faggot. it costed you 1.5 trillion bucks AT LEAST, and most likely much much more. BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

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I actually called it perfectly. It took me a couple days to get by funds in so I bought last Friday but that's good enough for me.

Even if the virus where to disappear tomorrow it has forever changed the world.

with the virus here, when exactly are people going to go back to work? The more we coop down the longer it will take for the virus to run its course.

Italy and Spain may have the virus under control by summer, but they will be devastated economically. In the US we will either hunker down until the next virus wave or go herd immunity. Either way economy is fucked.

Companies have already told their landlords they are not paying rent until they can make money, renters will do the same. Trumpbucks come once, why not more often? Restaurants are devastated, they need to stay open and bleed money or shut down and screw people.

Where are you looking that you are seeing nothing fundamentally wrong with the economy?

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dead_cat_bounce

The whole thing is going up because it is propped up by the Fed which already admitted to dumping trillions into the economy and more money handed out through a 2 trillion dollar stimulus package. The only thing that should be getting help from this stimulus package are small businesses who can't weather the storm going on right now in the economy because they had to layoff employees and shut doors. However, I guarantee you this stimulus package is going to be filled with shady shit and a good portion of it is going to end up in the hands of bankers and big corporations.

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The FED dumps trillions of dollars into market creationg the first step for a violent dollar value inflation
>HEHEHE market go up eheh

There's some indicators that are rising like unemployment and the money supply.

HAPPENING CANCELED

BUY BUY BUY

>A stock in a severe decline has a sharp bounce off the lows.[6]
>A small upward price movement in a bear market after which the market continues to fall.[7][8]
Nowhere does it say that it can only happen once, you dumb nigger. The second definition even implies it can happen multiple times.

Looks like the baby from that dinosaur show in the 90s

The virus is literally a nothingburger that kills some boomers. I don't know what the supply chain interruption will mean for our grester economy, but even if everyone gets back to work tomorrow no doubt this has shifted a lot more people to the left, because fuck landlords, the 1%, kikes, etc. This entire fiasco was merely an opportunity for banks and corporations to offload shitloads of bad debt onto the Federal Reserve's balance sheets, as well as others around the world to do the same with their respective central banks. I was hoping for a total fucking collapse because fuck this gay Earth, but every day shit doesn't get worse it seems like it gets better.

Wait until the unemployment numbers hit tomorrow.

>The second definition even implies it can happen multiple times.
no it doesn't, you brain dead sand-nigger, it's even implied that it happens once by the term, a cat isn't a fucking basketball, you dumbass

>he fell for the bull trap
>again

QE infinity

Please please please be true. I bought 30,000 dollars in puts that expire Friday.

>a cat isn't a fucking basketball,
depends how much you QE

>corona just starting to ravage the US
>whole world about to go on full lockdown like Wuhan
>most businises getting closed
>must be a good time to buy now hurr durr
I'd say sell your house and go all in retard.

>However, I guarantee you this stimulus package is going to be filled with shady shit and a good portion of it is going to end up in the hands of bankers and big corporations.

That shit happened with the repo loans. Those are expected to be paid back relatively quickly, but what's actually happened is that banks and other corporations were required to put shit up as collateral. What do you think they put up as collateral? Shitty loans that weren't worth a damn and were gonna take them down. In a month when the Fed asks for that repo money back the bank will quietly default and the Fed will write it off, and the shitty debt is off their balance sheet and on the Feds. This entire thing was just a wild cash grab. That's what's become of our economy. Banks and other financial institutions extend crazy amounts of credit to the public and when enough people default and trigger a financial crisis the Fed prints money to settle it all, and then rinse, repeat.