Aus/pol/

I get the feeling that this isn't going to last much longer. Government will look stupid after for overreacting

I am going to give you guys the cure for COVID-19 but DO NOT SHARE IT.

> 1.25 L SOLO ZERO SUGAR
> 1.1 L TONIC WATER ZERO SUGAR
> 4000 MG VITAMIN CHEWABLE TABLETS
> OPTIONAL: FRESH GRAPEFRUITS

Combine all liquid, crush vitamin c tablets and add it to the solution and mix well. Can optionally add some fresh squeezed grapefruits but only fresh squeezed/cold pressed, cannot be from the bottle/shelf or pasteurized.

Sip throughout the day. Do not exceed more than one of this preparation every 24h.

If you don't like the taste or it's too strong, dilute with water (or make a slush in the blender with ice cubes. Add an extra 100mg vitamin C for every 100ml of additional liquid.

Eat as much beef stew as you can.

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play some rpgs

>>Oh no what will 5 million failed normal fag unemployed neets do?
>use neetbux to hoard toilet paper and tins of tomato soup
>not hoarding VS-ve commodores
Unbased
>I get the feeling that this isn't going to last much longer. Government will look stupid after for overreacting
Those jobs just won't magically reappear
Retail is permanently fucked since now everyone realised non essential stuff can be done exclusively online.
This will have a knock on effect of millions of jobs gone at a quicker rate than before.
We need universal basic income now

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You think this is an over reaction? Let’s see in a few weeks time what the infection / death rate is before you make a call. A few weeks ago it was a meme to Australians

Why zero sugar?

>play some rpgs
Got vidya burnout lately
Half life alyx sucked doom eternal sucked played an hour of each lost interest

tabletop or computer 'rpg'
because computer 'rpg' games are filled with trannies and faggots these days

Legit question: what percentage of second year university girls (age around 19-20, usually) have had sex? I'm a bit older (26) because I left uni for a while and now I've changed majors, so essentially I'm back in second year subjects around people much younger than me. These girls look so fucking young man. It's like a window into a different world. They look very innocent and honestly pretty uptight/frigid. Have most of them actually had sex by this point?

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The real cure (pic related). As an added bonus it also gives you super strength to deck hospital security guards and nurses.
You might be right. If it blows open in the US over the next week or two I'll change my mind.

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>now is not the time for fear
the time for fear was January, but pollies had to drag their feet until late March

Meth's alright. I prefer dexies myself.

Blood sugar can have high spikes during COVID-19 and similar conditions, which exacerbates headaches and fatigue. Refined sugars also increase generally inflammation which puts a higher load on your immune system which is already in overdrive. Better to stick to higher protein/fat diet or complex carbohydrates to modulate blood sugar levels.

Im not sure if that comes with super strength

Yes. 3 - 4 times for the timid shy looking ones. 30+ for the good looking shy ones that dress whorish

When am I getting my Austudy increase farken meet cunts

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Interesting. It's fucking strange to imagine these young stupid cunts getting fucked. I almost see them as still children.

Late April

>When am I getting my Austudy increase farken meet cunts
I better get my corona bucks suppliment as a dsp reee

Cenno sent me a text at 12am telling me my phone appointment is tomorrow. What exactly do they ask in the phone interview? I'm an anxious autist and don't want to fuck this up. I need my neetbux

How can you fuck it up? If you're not scamming them just tell the truth

It just means you're getting older. They are still fuckable but mentally they are so beneath you that it's almost somewhat of a turnoff. You're probably at that stage where you mind is telling you that you'd rather more static companionship or a long time mate. Probably better to avoid that urge until you're in your 30's unless you plan on settling down very soon.

>quinine and vitamin c
just make a gin and tonic, stir in some mint leaves and garnish with a lemon
serve in a copper mug, silver if you're uncultured, but make sure it's real silver and not pewter
don't worry about the verdigris and don't polish it off, you don't want to be consuming that shit. utensils are meant to be used, not displayed. consuming a bit of oxidized copper or silver is good for you.

I told you I'm an anxious fuckup. Not lying about anything. I hope I get a nice person.

>phone appointment
hang around and wait for them not to call you
they might call, but out of a dozen 'phone appointments' I've had in the past, they only bothered to call me 2-3 times.

Lol, I don't think I'd have a chance with these girls, or any girls. Still a virgin at 26 and don't think I'll lose it any time soon.

I honestly think that while in a way these very young girls are attractive, in more ways they are repulsive in the way they are sheltered from the reality of the world. I despise them.

>If you're not scamming them just tell the truth
majority of dsp fags, including several on this board have claimed shit like anxiety or schizophrenia as laziness is not a requirement. There's a whole art to it apparently.

just don't mention jews

I'm a 25 year old virgin

Talk to one and see if you really despise them

Who else wants to smash Michaelia's gash.

Me too

Yeah I was surprised I even got the message. I got my claim in the day before everything went completely to shit so I am ahead of most people I'm guessing about No. 10,000 out of 200,000
Who knows what their backlog will be like

Maybe you two should fuck

I've done so and it only makes me hate them more. Not a single one has shown me they have the capability for independent thought.

That's young people for you. They grow as they get older.

hi ozzies

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NO

>they are repulsive in the way they are sheltered from the reality of the world. I despise them.
I have that mentality with most kids at uni, none of the little cunts have ever worked a day in their life and are supported 100% by their parents, including the car that they drive. I work, pay a mortgage, and still have enough time to submit assignments, while the little shits ask for help, or I constantly have to take the slack on group work.

what are you studying? how they are as people changes radically depending on what course they're studying. For example, stay away from nurses.

Sorry, not a faggot

>For example, stay away from nurses.
Why?

Is that true? Young people are known to be the most idealistic. If only they actually thought a bit about what to idealise, and it wasn't always the SAME FUCKING SHIT, like "cimate change". Literally every young girl at university has decided the climate change hoax is what she's going to be passionate about.

they're typically whores.

I used to study computer science (no girls at all), now I study chemistry (and do some biology courses) and it's fucking LOADED with girls. Honestly, particularly in chemistry (second year here), they tend to be extremely academic and utterly one dimensional. They're also only academic in a very narrow sense of the word. If you try and talk about something they haven't explicitly been told to learn, you get a blank expression.

What are you studying?

Can't be worse than law students

>nothing has happened besides everything closing
no mention of the collapse in negotiations with OPEC and russia amidst their oil price war with saudi arabia?
no mention of this being a direct response to the USA's sanctions imposed on the russian oil company Rosneft after it was assisting with oil trade from venezuela?
no mention of the biggest catalyst influencing the stock market crash at all? really?

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I'm not a scammer, but I was nervous that I'd be mistaken for a scammer, so cenno thought I was lying at first.
Fortunately, most of the people that work there don't give a shit. I thought it was funny that they had a registered nurse and then an OT interview me to asses my 'tism, which is out of their field, then they threw me to an outside psychologist anyway. I spent more time in the waiting room than in the actual psych 'assessment,' which just got rubber-stamped by some post-menopausal Karen, who was probably only doing these independent assessments in order to keep her practice open.

>I'm a 25 year old virgin
Noob I'm 29 in may haha
>>nothing has happened besides everything closing
>no mention of the collapse in negotiations with OPEC and russia amidst their oil price war with saudi arabia?
>no mention of this being a direct response to the USA's sanctions imposed on the russian oil company Rosneft after it was assisting with oil trade from venezuela?
>no mention of the biggest catalyst influencing the stock market crash at all? really?
I meant in this shithole
Ausneed

>I meant in this shithole
we don't live a in a vacuum, the global chess pieces have a tidal effect on every corner of the board.

>sexless lives
what roastie cope
there are shitloads of people married and in long term relationships here, dumb roastie asspain over being alone and incapable of whoring herself while couples are fucking like rabbits

Here is a pretty bug I saw today.

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>>I meant in this shithole
>we don't live a in a vacuum, the global chess pieces have a tidal effect on every corner of the board.
Memeflag we are less than 2% of the global population.
The only shit that matters a fuck near us is south China sea memes
Nobody gives a fuck about aus and we don't give a fuck about anyone else

what's gonna happen when flu season comes around? is the news gonna characterise the flu as corona-virus, leading to more infringements on our human rights?

the recession the world is facing right now is literally due to the lack of oil demand in the middle east and the nations involved with OPEC. by the way, the world includes australia

>what's gonna happen when flu season comes around? is the news gonna characterise the flu as corona-virus, leading to more infringements on our human rights?
Now your getting it
Cough induced eugenics
It's a bugs life
This.
All I need is a big pair of mommies breasts

>Queensland elections
That's gonna be a nah from me. Imagine having level 2 lock downs and then wanting everyone to gather to vote. What a fucking shit show.

It will all blow over in a week or two.

they should've been postponed weeks ago

Still plenty good tucker at my shop

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you'll be a wizard soon
sex is better than masturbation though, especially without a condom. doesn't matter if you blow your load as soon as you enter; warm, wet and grips your shaft just right. your hand just can't compare.
it also makes you feel good emotionally, it will put you in a great mood after you have a sleep, assuming you fucked someone you actually like though. there's no post-orgasmic shame/depression/"ah fuck now I need to clean up" thoughts going through your head and you feel nice because you've been intimate with someone.

even so, you're not missing out on much, so just hold out a few years for the superpowers

The cunts running the show are as useless as tits on a bull. They will try to fine me, but hopefully "The government is literally fucking telling me to self-isolate" is a good enough reason so that they leave me alone.

>the recession the world is facing right now is literally due to the lack of oil demand in the middle east and the nations involved with OPEC. by the way, the world includes australia
Don't care we could completely cut ourselves off with no reprocussions and restart manufacturing and refining + nukes tomorrow if we wanted but spineless pollies won't renationalise
It will be used to push digital voting that they can further manipulate and global ids for (health) reasons
You think these new covid laws and just gonna go away? Get used to checkpoints and health id digital papers citizen

just tell them you didn't vote for religious reasons

who do I need to chin to get on Super Saiyan ScoMo bux?

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>chemistry

they're nice, lots of qt girls do chemistry, I'm doing engineering and all the women are in chem eng.

nurses are typically dumber than law students imo, never met a whorish law student tho. Veterinary students are pretty cock hungry too, which I found surprising, but every degree has a few girls who ride the cock carousel hard and make it look bad for the others

> we could completely cut ourselves off with no reprocussions and restart manufacturing and refining + nukes tomorrow
whether true or not, we're part of the global economy right at this moment and no hypothetical isolationist situation will change that. whatever happens to the global markets, happens to us, as displayed by the massive loss of jobs and dependence on welfare. it's important to keep people up to date with current global affairs instead of the institutionalised tabloids of australian media and their complete lack of integrity or value with reporting.

I've never been fined for not voting. Compulsory voting is a myth that only works because everyone seems to believe it. Im pretty sure the fine isn't much anyway

>none of the little cunts have worked a day in their life and are supported 100% by their parents
Sure that maybe makes up 10% of uni students. Keep seething faggot

Is this a thing that works?

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>what do they call a nothingburger in France
even if, and that's a big 'if' it blows over, it's going to get milked for the next 6 months to a year.
They cancelled the Olympics and the world economy is going down the shitter.

If it doesn't blow over, it'll be a lot worse.

Yeah it's only like $130 or something, it's just the principle of the matter that annoys me. I don't want to risk getting the Shanghai shivers because these retards can't make up their mind about group gatherings

yeah Jehovah's Witnesses don't voter because there is no higher power than god or some shit. I used it last two elections and nothing happened

>you'll be a wizard soon
>sex is better than masturbation though, especially without a condom. doesn't matter if you blow your load as soon as you enter; warm, wet and grips your shaft just right. your hand just can't compare.
>it also makes you feel good emotionally, it will put you in a great mood after you have a sleep, assuming you fucked someone you actually like though. there's no post-orgasmic shame/depression/"ah fuck now I need to clean up" thoughts going through your head and you feel nice because you've been intimate with someone.
>even so, you're not missing out on much, so just hold out a few years for the superpowers
What a fantastic post I love this facken cunt
>Still plenty good tucker at my shop
NOOO NOT MY HOPPIN ROOFUUU WAIFUS

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$20

Interesting, thanks user.

I hate women. Women need to be thrown off rooftops ISIS style. Is that normal?
t. Bust a nut guy

nah just throw the gays off the roof. women can be made property again

I got released from the mental health ward earlier frens. I spent over a week in there. Imagine the money I wasted.

Where you been Bust a Nut?

that's not a bad idea if you think you have chink virus and they don't want to test you

My hobby is wasting gov resources. I bludge on cenno. I've never worked a day in my life. I've never paid a cent in income tax. I'll never repay my HECS debt. I refuse to support a system that supports single mothers. I'm getting 750 neetbux from scomo. Is that normal?

A success this time. Did you get the leather couch?

yeah everyone is getting that now, plus 6 months of double cenno. no one has a job anymore. we are all on the dole now

>I refuse to support a system that supports single mothers
you should run for parliament with this policy

In hospital fren. I got a schizophrenia diagnosis. I'm applying for DSP. Is that normal?

did they force inject you in the bum with anti psychotics?

had to go to the jobcentre to claim my neetbucks today.
they have started to do checkups by phone from now on and i only have to search for 4 jobs a month instead of 20.
my assigned wageslave wasnt there because he has a "cold"
Luckily i wore my p100 mask and goggles.
there is cases in my town and even with all the corona virus spam on the radio and tv the locals are still out walking their dogs in the centre of town and none of them were wearing masks.

the world is burning.
were all gonna make it.

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Thats normal for you. But Newstart will be higher than dsp for the next 6 months

I got the leather couch and a comfy room fren. I even got a blowjob from some drug addict slut in the communal social room. I still hate women though. Is that normal?

you are full of shit then because if you are a schizo they fucking inject that shit into your bum and it last's a month

I was given Saphris fren.

>had to go to the jobcentre to claim my neetbucks today.
>they have started to do checkups by phone from now on and i only have to search for 4 jobs a month instead of 20.
>my assigned wageslave wasnt there because he has a "cold"
>Luckily i wore my p100 mask and goggles.
>there is cases in my town and even with all the corona virus spam on the radio and tv the locals are still out walking their dogs in the centre of town and none of them were wearing masks.
>the world is burning.
>were all gonna make it.
Dsp Chad mommy fag here it's all good mate I see normies going to work when they can just work from home here too fuck them lmao

HIIII DAAADDDDD
UGGHH GROAN ZONE

I missed you

>sex is better than masturbation though
depends I think. I have amazing wanks thinking about the sex I had with a French girl I no longer talk to, and a couple of good wanks to a video I took fucking her at a lookout over a waterfall. Some of these were better than the actual sex

you taking it? it working? doesn't seem like it