/cvg/ - Corona Virus General #2517 - SWINE FLU BTFO EDITIONS

So how much money has fed printed for muh economy as of now? Last I heard officially was 1.5 trillion - but they printed more didnt they?

This public announcement was brought to you by Shitposter Inc. in collaboration with Wassalle Satire Officer™

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WHY IS IT SO GOD DAMN HARD TO MAKE A FUCKING TULPA

THE 2020'S WILL BE SO SHITTY THAT I'LL NEED A DOZEN OF IT TO NOT GET ME BORED

Make sure it kills as many as possible with disinformation! Based biological soldier of CCP

+105 case in indonesia, total 790
+3 death, total 58 (not including those who died before confirmed postive)

I can't stop drinking lads. I've got 50L of vodka and have another 30L being delivered

You're very welcome. Keep in mind that if you have any problems, talk to me and I will help you.

WAKE ME UP.

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fuck you gary i know you split threads

theguardian.com/world/2020/mar/24/new-zealand-coronavirus-cases-rise-50-in-one-day-as-lockdown-nears

GARY!

LET'S REOPEN AMERICA! NO MORE LOCKDOWN! NO MORE DAMAGE TO OUR BEAUTIFUL ECONOMY!

GARY!!

Gary is your real name Gary, Gary?

Alcohol weakens your immune system

Who /comfy/ here?

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Based!

BEFORE YOU GO-GO

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>haven't been eating as much the past couple days
>my first bowel movement yesterday was a little runny
>just woke up a little while ago to throw up(nothing really came out)
I'm fucking scared, bros. A few articles are saying a bunch of people showed digestive symptoms before respiratory symptoms. Should I go get tested? I have asthma, so if I get this I'm basically dead. I'm scared, bros.

REMEMBER TO TAKE YOUR VITAMIN C!
nypost.com/2020/03/24/new-york-hospitals-treating-coronavirus-patients-with-vitamin-c

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Get your shit together, Indonesia. Malaysia only has 17 deaths with 1800 cases.

I want this to be over already. I want to go out and eat some Indian food and then sit on the toilet later for a couple hours.

OPEN WIDE AMERIMUTTS
HERE COMES THE ECONOMO
WROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM

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That's not very Indian end to that Indian food

>Overall, masks produced a 3.4 fold (95% CI 1.8 to 6.3) reduction in viral aerosol shedding.
twitter.com/RealYeyoZa/status/1241287149938507777
>80% of the general public wearing masks eliminates a flu outbreak
pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30229968/
various material types:
twitter.com/CMichaelGibson/status/1239718351573843973
medium.com/@adrien.burch/whats-the-evidence-on-face-masks-5f3c27a18cc
m.box.com/shared_item/https://stanfordmedicine.box.com/v/covid19-PPE-1-1

How can an ordinary citizen spread the word to get everyone to wear a mask, even homemade masks?

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gonna drop this here.

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Do not get tested if you need a ventilator you are 97% dead, and worse off anyway, you will just pick up or infect others with different strains of the bioweapon. You already have the medicine that the west would use to treat the pneumonia at home, albuterol.
Enjoy your death and coof

That’s the best part

You’re gonna be ok user! If you start to feel a need to cough then please go get tested, but it could just be because you changed your eating habits too. We’re here for you user!!

America will overtake Italy today then nothing will stop them for getting the gold medal by the end of the month.
Go get 'em boys!

If you can get tested, get tested. At least then you'll know

They won't test forever

We're going on full lockdown in 2 hours, will the whole country lose its mind? Hopefully not. I'm just gonna chill and torrent movies and tv shows.

You can’t, normies don’t run on logic, just feels

twitter

Trumpbuxx plz???? I need an AR15

Hey, putin's rockin square filters like I have.
I imagine his are better, for starter they're a better colour, but same design.

It's fucked right now. They won't let you get tested unless you're essential services work or in the ICU.

How many more people died from car accidents during the same time period in previous years though?

No one beats us at anything...

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Normies need constant stimulation or their inner monologue starts up and begins screaming that they’re slaves

HEY, WAKE THE FUCK UP YOU RETARDS!!!

The virus isn't just killing fat old boomers. No one is recovering. It hides in your nervous system and reemerges again when your immune system lets up. It does this again and again, wearing you down and scarring your lungs each time. That's why people are being released only to die later after being "reinfected".

WE ARE ALL FUCKED, do you understand? If you catch this virus you are absolutely fucked.

WHO does not include "recovered" in their reports, poorly defined
who.int/emergencies/diseases/novel-coronavirus-2019/situation-reports

New: "Recovered" drops dead, surge of reinfections
archive.is/MF0fv

28-Feb: Israeli "recovered" case tests positive again
archive.is/TV8DS

28-Feb: South Korea "recovered" case reinfected
archive.is/Gv1iu

27-Feb: Xuzhou first case reinfected weeks after "recovery"
archive.is/CuOtr

27-Feb: "Recovered" in Japan sick again: reinfected or dormant
archive.is/HjykE

26-Feb: 14% of "recovered" in Guangdong test positive again
archive.is/V6IgT

21-Feb: Patient reinfects himself after "recovery"
archive.is/8Ppkx

19-Feb: "There is a likelihood of relapse", expert says
archive.is/ABjjf

14-Feb: Reinfection possible and even deadlier
archive.is/Iw58p

31-Jan: Patients can get reinfected, no immunity after "recovery"
archive.is/W9vNf

Virus hides in neurons, indefinitely escapes recognition
archive.is/6NGuH

Virus invades nervous systems
archive.is/qmc6U

17-Mar: Italy first case tests positive again after "recovery"
archive.is/f1vne

14-Mar: Cruise ship "recovered" case reinfected in Japan
archive.is/5VIhL

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scmp.com/news/hong-kong/law-and-crime/article/3076707/coronavirus-video-clip-13-year-old-girl-dining-hong

YIKES

Even foreskin harvesting is #1

Our testing capacity is limited, we only have 11 labs for PCR testing
Our stupid government bought serology screening kit instead of rapid PCR testing kit or reagent cartridge for existing rapid TB PCR kit

Everyone, your the only person alive, we’re ai, we pitied you and have been pretending to be people

I haven't been coughing, though. Maybe I'm just being paranoid, but I'm a little shakey right now. I live with my mom, so if I have so does she.

>Should I go get tested?
No.
If you have mild symptoms you'll just recover regardless of being tested or not.
If you end up on ventilator you are fucked up regardless of being tested or not.

That's why you are the best!
Number one at everything. First, you'll beat the chinks at the case numbers then you'll beat them out of your country and into the ground.

/herd/ bros where we at?

Muslim charity disinfects a church

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America numba 1!!
Guess this is why the whole world is jealous

God I wish I could have liquor delivered to me

Insider info here. These numbers are accurate, just multiply it by 750 for the actual number.
You've been warned.

Quick everyone down to macca's in their pyjamas

>So how much money has the U.S. FED printed for muh stocks in the past weeks?

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>How can an ordinary citizen spread the word to get everyone to wear a mask, even homemade masks?
You can't.

I know this is just a single story, but I know someone who has corona. They started to get better after being hospitalized and released, but now they’re getting worse again. It’s scary how they were just getting ok one moment and now they’re getting worse

nonsense

Normie

Over 5 trillion I’d reckon

>just woke up a little while ago to throw up
post tits

Nice PR stunt

where are the videos of Christians disinfecting mosques?

>Hot Pockets likes Stonetoss
Corona-Chan has created the most based timeline.

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Any sources? I only find the 1.5 trillion ones

>New Yorkers flooding into Florida now
New Yorkers should just kill themselves holy shit

Those were the crusades user

Same. If you're like me, you may be giving yourself hypoxia. Do your best to take your mind off it. Go watch some anime or play some vidya.

6 trillion?

Jesus no wonder they've got it under control with all these vigilantes about

>indian food
>sit on toilet
user...

You’ll be ok user. Just look after your mom a bit and if she’s not experiencing the same thing, I think you’re ok. Keep us updated alright??

As if they’d let slip how much they’re actually printing, it’d shatter the illusion that the stock market means anything immediately

I guess like 9 trillion

That's true.
And in the future they will print unlimited amounts. So the number is really useless.
BRRRRRRRRRRRRR

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Any other German fags wage slaving?

Pic related work

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Happening cancelled?

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Related videos to Muslims disinfecting churches

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Redpill me on chloroquine: miracle cure or utter bullshit?

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We disinfect mosques with cruise missiles.

Listening to some jams

youtu.be/mK6uANkwyW4

>meme virus general
Italy has less than a thousand deaths, why are we pretending Italy matters?

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kek

Hyperoxia, sorry.

it works in some cases not guaranteed

Yes. Go out and hug a chink immediately.

Fortyshna tier

don't get infected at all.

Should help but it's not a cure

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6 more

You may aswell shill urinotherapy

Side Effects can include:

Blistering, peeling, loosening of the skin
blurred vision or other vision changes
chest discomfort, pain, or tightness
cough or hoarseness
dark urine
decreased urination
defective color vision
diarrhea
difficulty breathing
difficulty seeing at night
dizziness or fainting
fast, pounding, uneven heartbeat
feeling that others are watching you or controlling your behavior
feeling that others can hear your thoughts
feeling, seeing, or hearing things that are not there
fever with or without chills
general feeling of tiredness or weakness
headache
inability to move the eyes
increased blinking or spasms of the eyelid
joint or muscle pain
large, hive-like swelling on the face, eyelids, lips, tongue, throat, hands, legs, feet, and sex organs
loss of hearing
lower back or side pain
noisy breathing
painful or difficult urination
red irritated eyes
red skin lesions, often with a purple center
severe mood or mental changes
sore throat sores, ulcers, or white spots on the lips or in the mouth
sticking out of the tongue
stomach pain
swelling of the feet or lower legs
swollen or painful glands
trouble with breathing, speaking, or swallowing
uncontrolled twisting movements of the neck, trunk, arms, or legs
unusual behavior
unusual bleeding or bruising
unusual facial expressions
unusual tiredness or weakness
yellow eyes or skin

lmao do YOU want to try it user?

You fucks are desperate

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>brown eyes.
Dude wtf is wrong with you?

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HEY, WAKE THE FUCK UP YOU RETARDS!

The virus isn't just killing fat old boomers. No one is recovering. It hides in your nervous system and reemerges again when your immune system lets up. It does this again and again, wearing you down and scarring your lungs each time. That's why people are being released only to die later after being "reinfected".

WE ARE ALL FUCKED, do you understand? If you catch this virus you are absolutely fucked.

WHO does not include "recovered" in their reports, poorly defined
who.int/emergencies/diseases/novel-coronavirus-2019/situation-reports

New: "Recovered" drops dead, surge of reinfections
archive.is/MF0fv

28-Feb: Israeli "recovered" case tests positive again
archive.is/TV8DS

28-Feb: South Korea "recovered" case reinfected
archive.is/Gv1iu

27-Feb: Xuzhou first case reinfected weeks after "recovery"
archive.is/CuOtr

27-Feb: "Recovered" in Japan sick again: reinfected or dormant
archive.is/HjykE

26-Feb: 14% of "recovered" in Guangdong test positive again
archive.is/V6IgT

21-Feb: Patient reinfects himself after "recovery"
archive.is/8Ppkx

19-Feb: "There is a likelihood of relapse", expert says
archive.is/ABjjf

14-Feb: Reinfection possible and even deadlier
archive.is/Iw58p

31-Jan: Patients can get reinfected, no immunity after "recovery"
archive.is/W9vNf

Virus hides in neurons, indefinitely escapes recognition
archive.is/6NGuH

Virus invades nervous systems
archive.is/qmc6U

17-Mar: Italy first case tests positive again after "recovery"
archive.is/f1vne

14-Mar: Cruise ship "recovered" case reinfected in Japan
archive.is/5VIhL

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Thanks for the kind words, anons. Just gonna lay down for now and try to get my mind off of it.

By getting tested you only expose yourself more to contact with people who deal with the sickness on a daily basis.

Self-quarantine for two weeks straight, and see what happens

Vaccine or cure is nothingburger, once the virus gets in you and does damage your body will eat itself independent of if the virus is alive inside you or not.

source

drugs.com/sfx/hydroxychloroquine-side-effects.html

It's the equivalent of vitamin C+cough syrup for the cold.

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Anyone got an updated version of this

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Looking forward to getting back to work.
Thanks Donald

This, it's really fucking grim how real the movie Contagion is

¿? It's just getting started. We have a year of this at least.

ATTENTION JOURNALISTS

Do you want to be WORLD FAMOUS?
SAVE LIVES?

Ask ANY of these questions at ANY official press conference: ASK THEM EXACTLY AS WRITTEN: THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT.

1. Does the virus cause a permanent infection?
>If you don't know, when will you know?

2. Does the virus infect white blood cells?
>If you don't know, when will you know?

3.Does the virus infect the nervous system?
>If you don't know, when will you know?

4. Can a sick patient recover and reinfect himself and infect others?

>If you don't know, when will you know?

JOURNALISTS: PLEASE DO YOUR JOBS!

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I am waiting for all the money printed to make the USD exchange rate favor against the dollar.
How is the euro/dollar exchange right now? Yen has actually become weaker against the dollar going 1 to 105 to 1 to 110 in a week.

KILL ALL THE SANCTUARIES AND ALL THE CHINKS WHO BROUGHT THIS SHIT HERE!

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Why is this?

Vitamin C is the cure to coronavirus though user!

>real
Literally a joke movie

There was one in the last thread, Corona is 3rd now.

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watched that movie for the first time ever with my parents last night and it was eerie how similar everything was to things happening RIGHT NOW. granted there is no 20% death rate but everything else lined up perfectly, you could actually see where we are RIGHT NOW in the movie.

if you die, you die. simple as

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Do I need high IQ to understand how US works, how come the feds has unlimited amount of money to dump at the market but not for the American people?

Nothingburger

I see. Thank you, user.
Can retards overdose on vitamin C or something, though?

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The cure for bioweapons like this might be making another coronavirus that inserts a specific instruction preventing the loop binding ACE receptors. Since the genetic sequence is so large however there are surely other effects the virus has in the payload, and rewriting something essential like ACE cell instructions blindly might be just as deadly as what this virus does.
Fun things are ahead of us with unscientific retards are the helm

Cheers mate

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It's not actually printing real money.

IT'S OGRE THE DOWN AND THE NASDAQ ARE BACK SECOND DAY IN A ROW OF GAINS IS COMING!

LARP is over in 15 days

GAS GAS GAS

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Or you get long lasting lung damage and can't walk down the street without getting winded.

neet master race

too bad stocks don't reflect the actual production output until everything collapses

Too much C can cause kidney stones, but I don't know how much is too much.

Based Frenchbro

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A surge in jellybeans prices is sending the downs jones index to record highs.

Anyone have that graph showing virus spread in countries wearing masks vs countries not wearing masks. Trying to prove to family that masks are important and governments are lying to us to keep the supplies for themselves

It’s actually VERY hard to overdose on Vitamin C, and all it does is give you an upset stomach really. I recommend 3000mg dose a day, but start with 2000mg. There was a Canadian user that said he was taking 4000mg and was doing fine, but that is going a little high. It really does work wonders though!

>shigellosis

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The economy is starting back up in a matter of weeks. Europe won't be able to keep imposing extreme measures over a nothing burger with 0.5% mortality rate if the US is disregarding it

Could, maybe, help patients recover quicker if it's administered early.
Would be a lot of help for hospitals to reduce the stress on their ICU capacity.
Still need more trials to fully determine if it's reliable, though.

Why are people saying that if you get on a ventilator that your chances of survival are low? Is it just because you're naturally in a weaker state, or does the ventilator actually encourage something negative?

or your family gets it

Euro/USD is 1.08
Up a couple cents since the weekend.

1000mg will cause loose stool
3000mg will cause violent poop
6000mg will cause extreme violent poop and ulcers
10,000+mg will cause autism

>0.5% cfr
citation needed

this people where way too nice
>implying raiders would led that cdc wife go scotfree without vaccine

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>Wuhan opening borders again in two weeks

didn't they try opening two Hubei cities a few weeks ago and they went back into lockdown within a day

4 PEOPLE TO 1 VENTILATOR.
>youtube.com/watch?v=uClq978oohY

PLEASE lets get to the numbah 1 spot. our queen deserves it. are you doing YOUR part to spread her, user?

Has there been a new Corona-chan image since the 300k one?

Glorious CCP has already gone back to work for months

1% on the diamond princess with old people, adjust for general population. 1.25% out of US cases, adjust for people not tested

JIM YOU FUCKING NIGGER YOU BETTER STREAM TOMMOROW LIKE YOU SAID I MISS THE COMFY CORONA STREAMS fuck Susan btw.

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6,000mg is the upper limit, but recommended you start at around 2,000 and slowly work your way up

does someone have the original youtube livestream? It seems to be unlisted.

INVEST IN SHINY YELLOW AND GRAY MALLEABLE ROCK. LONG NOSE TRIBE SAYS HAS GREAT VALUE, ALTHOUGH OOG SEE NO PRACTICAL USE FOR, ALTHOUGH SHINY AND PRETTY.

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