Wake up

draw up schematics for holocoaster open theme park invite Jews make film put it in time capsule mail letter to future me with instructions on how to retrieve. Now I’m rich and show hitler was not such a bad guy

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Send an assassin to kill Churchill.

Nuke China

Not bad, but how about this?

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Kek af

Ten replies in and I’m the first to say “Holocaust for real.” This place is slipping.

based

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1938
You have no tanks
You have no Austria
You have no Czech Skoda master race factories or equipment
WW2 hasn't even started yet.

>Put on my PJ's and invade Russia

gib czechoslovakia (minus sudetenland) back to league of nations

ally poland full military alliance and economic-industrialization aid package in exchange for corridor to danzing and agricultural products (also promise poland territorial gainz in the east)

crush france and take elsass lothringen, form benelux reich out of conquered belgium and netherlands, bomb angloland into rubble without mercy (first remove the air fields, then obliterate the cities, no peace no mercy)

>Tell my scientists to hurry up on the nukes.
>Start nuking USSR and the frogs.
Force Anglosphere to be an ally because they would be too scared to get nuked.
>Let Japan fuck up China as much as they wanted.
>Enslave all the dirty southern Europeans and banish them to Africa.

Imvent the nuclear bomb and nuke everything

Stay vigilant, but don't make the first move, wait for Russia.
Prepare for war, but don't attack Poland nor France.
Slowly and covertly take the power of the jews, but don't kill them, just drive them out, slowly and steady.

I say 'Imagine, waking uo every day looking this good.." Then I would lick my fingertip, touch my nipple and make a "Tssss.." Sound and wave my finger, pretending that I burned it.

allied w turkey to fuck over the kikes and commie

Learn German

Start to consider a plan to systematically murder all Jews.

>Slowly and covertly take the power of the jews, but don't kill them, just drive them out, slowly and steady.
kek they'll just lie you killed six gorrilion of them once you inevitabley lose the war, I mean it sounds stupid that people would buy such a brazen lie but... oh wait

based

Also, be a little sad, as you are suddenly objectively uglier. .....Quick, to the drugs!!

Meth

Well you got the German humor down. Kys

Which war?
I am not attacking France nor Poland?

just go around stalingrad

Smoke weed, fuck jewish women and annihilate the German people

>Be Literally Hitler
>In Literal Germany
>Decide to invade France one day
>Literally just walk right across the border
>There's literally nobody here rn
oh my sweet summer child

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the one where the allies invade you because you're persecuting the poor schlomos and because you're a threat to the "balance of power" because the (((power centers))) of london and new york demand so

Literally immediately make a national address to the world that White countries unironically should never fight with each other ever again and create a worldwide coalition to destroy the japanese and prevent MAO from arising to power. Then colonize all the land Japan would have.

Eternal anglos forever gone.... That’s nice!

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It was implied by my saying Barbarossa still needs to happen that I would follow Hitlers footsteps except for the changes mentioned.

Banish all jews to india where they can only work as a poop scooper. Give them something to complain about then

>secure a source for more rubber for muh tank tracks
>call Haenel on the phone and tell them to hurry up and finish the maschinenkarabiner development
>eat vegetable soup
>make somebody pull Dirlewanger's crazy ass out of Spain
>pet Blondi
The future would have been so different lads.

Make the deal with the Soviet Union to invade Poland, but don't actually follow through. Then team up with Britain and France and remove commie. Britain and France will have to ally with Germany if they don't want to lose face, and can still get massive rep with Poland and allow a more peaceful integration.

Genocide everyone in Madagascar and move the top 10% of Germans there to create a white ethnostate, so that when the war is lost we still have white ethnostate.

Biggest mistake Hitler made was not utterly crushing the British army at Dunkirk.

Once that army had capitulated then Britain would sue for peace. His mistake was assuming the Bruderbond he felt for England they would feel the same way.

The second mistake was taking pressure off the RAF, had they beaten the RAF they could have taken England in Operation Sealion. They would still have had to contend with the Royal Navy but once they put Mosley into power England would come on Team.

Next instead of fighting each other, power up for an all out Western Europe vs USSR battle to the death. And the west would have won that.

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Build a lot of ovens.

Oh yeah, you know how to make a nuclear bomb off the top of your head?

just smash some plutonium into more plutonium nigga like just fire a uranium bullet into a ball of uranium how hard can it be?

You right, how could I forget

Take my time and grind xp to work my way up the tech tree.

Call the war off.

Same shit but just don't go to war with Russia and tone down a few other things

Operation Sea Lion could never happen.
0 amphibious landing resources

>Ally with USSR
>Invade UK and the rest of europe
>Secretly start developing the nuclear bomb
>Bomb the US back to the stone age and later the USSR
>Start a Pan-european 1000 year reich
>Use eugenics program to ascend the European men into godhood
>Start colonizing the rest of the solar system

easier said than done, you are no nuclear scientist, you'd just be telling them what they already theoretically know.

BASED

tell my scientists how to make a nuke and obliterate Washington, D.C.

Have the Jews document the conditions of our labor camps to show they are being treated fairly and not being thrown in ovens 6 gorrillion times.

Don't invade Ruski in winter. Give half of conquered land to Czechia.

Holy shit, that wouldve been amazing actually, the french and british would be left flabbergasted. they wouldn't have lifted a finger to declare war on the soviets though.

If the brits could evacuate Dunkirk, the Germans could use the same methods of crossing the channel the other way.

They had the means besides the fact. You don’t need D-Day numbers when the British would have functionally had no heavy equipment, the BEF was a most of their standing army and is now out of play. With the RAF out of the picture you control the channel.

They could have done it.

Kick all the non Europeans out of Europe and not invade Russia.

The war started to save Germans from ethnic cleansing in Poland, if Hitler failed on that then his “raison d’être” is gone.