/cvg/ - Corona Virus General #2283 TP for my bungholio Edition

ran out to get more ammo and oatmeal
am i gonna die Yas Forums

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Aren't we already near 20k today? Certainly past 10k with the 5000 italian cases.

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Gonna need you to wear a hazmat suit, or dont bother coming back

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FIRST CASE IN MY CITY AAAAAAAAAAAÁAAAAAAAAAA

TP, for my bunghole.

Which countries have true lock down? As in people caught outside their house is arrested by police or military. Like you're not even allowed to shop for food

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>German police rolling up in full riot gear and virus-protection to keep the peace at the refugee housing in Suhl after previous violent attempts of Merkel’s guests to escape the quarantine.

>Suhl - Nachdem sich die Bewohner eines Flüchtlingsheim am Wochenende und am Montag versucht hatten, sich gegen die verhängte Quarantäne zur Wehr zur setzen, sind am Dienstag weitere Einsatzkräfte hinzu gezogen worden. SEK, Wasserwerfer, Panzer und Rettungswägen wurden vor Ort aufgefahren.

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>Newly detected cases that haven’t shown systoms

Fuck you people are retarded. The death toll in the US could reach one million and you faggots would go
“Lmao only 1 million? Less than 1% of the total pop bro, what a nothing burger”
You people are the reason this has to be so much worse than it needs to be.

niggers
Should have removed them, frog

Boomer Doc Update:
youtube.com/watch?v=C-0Es0RKiU4

Says we're still in the early stages.
When will this ride end?

But that'd be a correct statement retard.
1 million is literally nothing.

Only China. Here in Italy they can arrest you only if you're suspected to be infected (in self isolation or confirmed positive). Other people only get a fine and a citation.

Shoot. Can I borrow yours?

>literally nothing
>1 million people
I understand you probably struggle with math but I'm going to inform you that you are wrong.

Thanks, pasta bro. I was wondering how things were in Italy too.

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It's literally nothing you snowflake.
There would still be 7.7 billion on Earth; life would go on unchanged as it always has.

>bro 1/340 US dead is a negligible statistic
If your metric for how devastating this is is whether or not it annihilates our species, you must be already under the influence of several layers of cope.

A friend of mine who works at an industrial machinery manufacturer says their clients in China are working (he can see it from his pc). Things are going back to normal in China but here we still have a few days of quarantine.
Things will start improving from newxt week, as current infections are from people who contracted the virus before the lockdown.

We're fine schizos

This doomcult is sad even for Yas Forums.
Just give it up already and get a grip; it's a mild cold for 99.99% of people.

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Less than 1% of the US population died in world war 2

Total nothing burger bro ww2 didn’t even happen lmao
I wish you faggots were the only ones who caught this and died, but unfortunately, you’re autism is going to cause a lot of good, innocent people to die.

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lol, just niqs niqqing.

Many active cases haven’t had time to develop into serious cases, they’re newly discovered and haven’t shown bad symptoms yet
You probably shouldn’t openly show people you have the critical reasoning skills of a golden retriever

I have to say, viruses are based af.
They are not even alive, just little programs that hack your cell.

thats 0.6%

They knew shit was gonna hit the fan, and stepped in full force.
Meanwhile, here in eu, they aren't locking shit down because they fear the economic crash more than they fear the virus.
It's gonna improve, but not next week, probably not even next month.
We're gonna have a lot of cheap empty houses that smell like piss and old people.

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meant to

strawpoll.me/19570602
strawpoll.me/19570602
strawpoll.me/19570602

Our cities look like ghost towns, I haven't seen anyone since 3 weeks now, and most of my friends and relatives are also in their homes. I think we'll see a drop in new infections from next week.
Spain is doing the same thing, but I agree that some countries are not doing enough.

>Less than 1% of the US population died in world war 2

is this true? i remember in highschool i was told it was like 15-20% and i always assumed that to be true. fuck school. fucking had spic and nigger leftie teachers during the bush jr area. commie fucks all probably soduku`d when trump got in. 90% of my classes in high school was telling us bush bad, he do wars n shit. and trying to get us to go to protests and skip school. much like there doing during trumps presidency.

If Corona acts like herpes, then the percentage of death will EVENTUALLY be 100% , even if it takes many years.
>be normie
>get infected
>get sick
>get "better" and resume life as normal, still infected but Corona-chan went to sleep
>hospital writes you off as "recoverd"
>many weeks, months even even years later she randomly wakes up and gives you crippling phenomena, often when your really stressed and immune system isnt up to snuff
>some normies might never see her wake up until they themselves are boomers
>this also means the average of old age will be lowered into the 60s or 70s, she wakes up way more often in those who are old.

Coronaviruses usually don't do that, there is no reason to expect this one to do so.

The potential permanent lung damage is bad enough.

Gyms are closed, what workouts are you guys doing at home?

france is blacker than south africa nice

No thats way too high
The USSR probably had 15%-20% lose of population (not included soilders who surivied only to return and immediately get gulag'd)
The US lost more to the Japanese then germans. Especially in places like Okinawa

Reminder not to fall for confirmation bias. You can't be counted if no one is counting. Now that tests are being done of course numbers are going to go up. Please calm the fuck down.

Autism at its worst.

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Corona viruses dont, but this one is spliced with a herpes or aids like effect

Imagine needing to dumb down that meme.

resistance band saved me with that, no improvement, but not losing gains either... yet.

really need some cardio though, i hate jumps and burpees, might order a stationary bike.

At least you have that.
I have three magazines worth.
I do have a box of MREs, though.
Maybe fucked, maybe not.

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say your parents get this are you allowed to visit them in hospital and pray with them becore they die?

Stop using porn!

In our time of greatest need, vast amounts of americans are bravely putting their lives on hold to hunker down as means of protecting themselves and others from the Wuhan Coronavirus. However, a new class of scumbag has emerged, sabotaging their efforts.

The coomer, the person that downloads petabytes of porn to feed their insatiable lust for pornographic content, has doomed us all. They wrench the bandwidth away from the heroic efforts of those who self isolate for their own selfish needs. Where the self-isolating could once be watching netflix or playing computer games, they are relegated to reading books, or worse, going outside.

If you suspect yourself, or anyone you know, of being a coomer, please report them to your local authorities. During this state of emergency, you are also authorized to commence auditing process r2-45 with them yourselves.

at this speed it'll pass 250k tomorrow and hopefully there'll be another version of corona-chan expansion.

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Netflix is just as bad for the bandwith. If not worse.

Bros 3 days ago the thingy that is in your toilet bowl you know the thing that cleans and purifies your toilet water you know the thing that makes it smell nice fell into the toilet and I didn't want to touch it so I've been shitting in my toilet without flushing for 3 days now. now I have been wiping my ass with TP but therein lies the problem because I cover up eat shit with a new layer of TP and it's gotten to the point got my entire toilet bowl it's full of shit and teepee. And I don't know what to do. Do I risk it and flush? I'm tempted to but I don't know if I should risk it because what if my fucking toilet explodes and the shit floods everywhere and like I don't know what to do. Help me Bros

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Yes, but it's being used by those who need it.

fox5dc.com/news/gastrointestinal-symptoms-should-be-monitored-amid-coronavirus-outbreak-doctors-say
>American College Of Gastroenterology based in Bethesda is trying to push out an important message about how the virus is being transmitted and detected.
>found that coronavirus may present with not only respiratory symptoms, which has been the main messaging, but with GI symptoms, mainly diarrhea.
>”GI tract plays a greater role than thought previously,"
>CDC seem to be mostly focused on fever, cough, and shortness of breath.
>diarrhea may be more commonly seen early on in the presentation
>about 50% of the 200 Coronachan victims studied out of Wuhan had presented diarrhea even before respiratory symptoms showed up.
>"The virus is in the stool. And it’s possible after using the bathroom we can contaminate a door nob a table top. If we touch somebody. That’s why it’s critical we wash our hands,"
>there’s also the potential for fecal-oral transmission.
archive.is/bkf9J
Mainstream media still weeks behind

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Reminder that in Italy first cases began with 2 chinks there.

give it to me straight bros

what's going on

Can her hips grow at 250?

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You thought 1 in 5 Americans died in WWII? Are you retarded?

They actually grew subtly at 200k

Pack it up boys, it's not happening anymore. based Raoult is gonna save use all, just start investing in research on blindness treatments

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twitter.com/antoniuszkh/status/1240293318564732929
>hospital needs to use Twitter to beg for PPE as they're facing shortages
lmao

Can her bush and armpit hair grow at 300k?

10k """confirmed"""*

They didn't get the gaseous plumes memo

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Michigan CDC is supposed to release the testing results everyday t 2PM. The website says that todays numbers are delayed.

COMPARISON BETWEEN EU CONTRIES SINCE THEY GOT THEIR FIRST 100 INFECTED

DAY 17:
ITALY: 12,464
>SPAIN: 17,147
GERMANY: 8,198
FRANCE: 7,730

SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
>SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
>SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
>SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
>SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
>SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
>SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
>SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
>SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
>SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
>SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
>SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
>SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
>SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
>SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT
>SPAIN + 5000 CASES THAN ITALY AT SAME DAY COUNT

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we need to go further beyond

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Alright, shit just got real. A woman working in a local kindergarten, just got confirmed and she lives two floors bellow me. I’ve prepped since February, got all sorts of masks, decided to self isolate for 10-14 days.

>pic related, blocked off the air vents in my bathrooms

What else to do? And how serious is it when coronachanned person is living that close to you in isolation?
Any user with similar experience?

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Reminder not to fall for confirmation bias. You can't be counted if no one is counting. Now that tests are being done of course numbers are going to go up. Please calm the fuck down.

Check your stool bois!

VP Pence begged on live television for construction companies to donate N95 masks to hospitals.
Things are fucked

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fox5vegas.com/coronavirus/all-of-nevada-s-hotel-casinos-to-shut-down-per/article_1762d600-67fc-11ea-8f29-9f3991ee8c8c.html
>all nonessential businesses in Nevada to close. Casinos and gaming operations are included in the order, to be closed by midnight Tuesday.
>every casino and gaming operation in the state of Nevada.
archive.is/wCHfA

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Yeah...I'm thinking based.

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Testing is significantly increased in Estonia and they are expecting the cases to hit 1000 in the end of this week.

should i quit my supermarket job? y/n

>PLASMA
>CHLOROQUINE
>BASICALLY HOODOO SCIENCE
>TRUMP APPROVED

If virus won't kill you the FDA will lmao

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But are you as fine as Iran?

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According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), there were 2,813,503 registered deaths in the United States in 2017.

holy fuck a man of culture

If you're the kind of person who has to ask, you probably should just stay where you are.

amazing the left does not call out China for their use of the phrases Italian virus or American virus.
well not so amazing, fuck them

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where are people going to launder their money with no casinos? very sad!

>new york starts testing people
>cases double
hmmmm I wonder what that means

Depends, are you adequately protected?
Plexiglass shield around the checkout?
Or does it have self-checkout and you sort in the stuff?

who is profiting from spreading this coronavirus hoax?

During today's interview Trump said they're loosening liability surrounding protective masks, allowing producers to sell masks they would otherwise consider unfit.
Fun times ahead.

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businessinsider.com/coronavirus-amazon-suspends-all-non-essential-shipments-to-warehouses-2020-3
>Amazon is blocking sellers from shipping nonessential products to its warehouses in response to the significant increase in orders it's seeing as the novel coronachan spreads across the US.
>only shipments of "household staples, medical supplies, and other high-demand products" to its warehouse until April 5
>prioritizing shipment in the following six categories: baby product; health and household (including personal-care appliances); beauty and personal care; grocery; industrial and scientific; pet supplies.
>high-demand products coming into our fulfillment centers so that we can more quickly receive, restock, and deliver these products to customers."
>Amazon said they would see "reduced purchase orders" as it "temporarily paused" orders for all non-essential products until April 5
archive.is/pNsdi

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>Third death from Covid-19 in Ireland confirmed, with 191 new cases, bringing total to 557

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So the TP hoarders were right all along?

no. it's just a flu bro

I only said grow but I wanted to say excessively grow.

>at work
>start coofing
>clears the entire room

CONSISTENT BAKER NEEDED NEW THREAD SHOULD BE LINKED AFTER 300 POSTS IF YOU ARE DONE BAKING YOU NEED TO ANNOUNCE SO IT CAN BE PASSED ON DO NOT DROP THE TORCH THAT IS HOW WE GET SPLIT THREADS

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I guess I should consider myself lucky that 3M even has plants left in the US that make them. Apparently he is using war powers to reallocate all those destined for commercial use to medical.
Hopefully Europe can do something similar

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based

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gonna need a source, champ

>more threads than presidents of Santander bank killed
>happening
Jesus Christ I've been waiting for something to show up between these empty buns already for almost 3 months and there's nothing yet.

NOT A BOOMER CLEANSER
>NOT A BOOMER CLEANSER
NOT A BOOMER CLEANSER
>NOT A BOOMER CLEANSER
NOT A BOOMER CLEANSER
>NOT A BOOMER CLEANSER
NOT A BOOMER CLEANSER
>NOT A BOOMER CLEANSER

edition.cnn.com/2020/03/19/health/coronavirus-age-victims/index.html?utm_medium=social&utm_content=2020-03-19T14:30:05&utm_term=link&utm_source=twCNN

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FRANCE NEWS NUMBERS

10 995 CASES (+ 1861)
372 DEATHS (+102)

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The pancake cartel

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>nipple rings
AAAAAAAAAAAA I'M SO LONELY

Life cannot stay unchanged with 7.7 billion doubling every 30-20(lately) years, you useless moron.

More
>inb4 ‘ok coomer’

ZOOMER REMOVER CONFIRMED

Do you have a communal water supply?
If so...
thehill.com/changing-america/well-being/prevention-cures/482798-can-coronavirus-spread-through-pipes-officials

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FRANCE NEWS NUMBERS

10 995 CASES (+ 1861)
372 DEATHS (+102)

twitter.com/BFMTV/status/1240709634492469249

and another thing /cvg/ knew well in advance comes true. Is this what Cassandra felt like?

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It won't be available immediately now. Immediately after the trials

kek didn't know pol was into T1 posting

literally natural selection

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and they're fucked because corona causes testicular damage that can lead to sterilization. Bill Gates has the biggest hard on right now knowing that this virus is killing old people, and making zoomers infertile.

Someone can plz post coronachan dabing infront of red stock markets?

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1122 IN ICU

fuck this is one off D:

have some other milkies

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ahghhaahahha niggers

Hospitalized doesn't mean dead. Young people rarely die from pneumonia in developed countries.

Go to bed Ivan, you're drunk.

Yeah

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What is the mental state of someone who cares what a swedish 17 year old says about the president. ffs

I'm so glad I built my new PC before the global economy collapsed

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wtf i love greta now

Greta redemption arc?

Millenials and Gen X-ers aren't of value. Zoomers shall inherit the world

it's starting
youtube.com/watch?v=MUtsx8EzwN0&feature=emb_logo

>danish coomer

ugh

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Here, banker.

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what if i have health insurance through them?

Meh. Keep it up, Corona-chan.

youtube.com/watch?v=MUtsx8EzwN0

FEMA conference live.

Trump sitting like an angry retard, someone probably told him what a retard he is.

Trump live at FEMA
youtube.com/watch?v=MUtsx8EzwN0

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Weed smoker remover.

>after UK the Netherlands backpaddled with their "Herd" idea
hahahahahaha holy shit

>CHLOROQUINE
Wuh is dat?

Nothing brings the world together like hating chinks

same as a person that believes chinese numbers

do you have one where she isn't a loli?

whats the most recent map for pollution above wuhan

That's what I have.

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Redpill me on girls that have that ring thing in their noses

Scenes from my trip to Morrisons this morning

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>

perfect - ty argentinia bro

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Ah hell ya, Thanks Cuck-user.

calisthenics stuff.
already had some equipment at home for that.

WHAT'S THE UPDATE FROM ITALY?

Where’s all the big brainers that still think this whole thing is a hoax/conspiracy/overreaction

It's shit over here too. Right before transport other governments can swoop up supplies by offering a higher price. Trades are redone left and right, making it difficult to produce future inventories. Besides that barely any testing gets done, and people are terrible at social distancing.

nej, jeg er MÆKLEmanden

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Achievement Unlocked: 1000 DAILY DEATHS

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WOAH GUYS THE TOILET PAPER AISLE IS EMPTY???? THIS IS BIG NEWS IF TRUE WOAH NEVER EXPECTED THAT

Dumpster sluts

my lvs puts. yay.

My family wants me to carry some stupid bricks through our neighborhood tomorrow in the middle of pandemic in a city with ~100 cases because it's just a flu bro.

Oh gosh it's hitting 250k today can I hold on until the update?

Do not shop Instacart
Half your shit will be out of stock
And then you get charged $9.95 delivery anyway
They shouldn't be allowed to offer the service if they know goddamn well there's nothing at the stores
I did prep but I wanted some chocolate milks :(

lidl is always full of niggers even in finland
why is that?
nigger market

Now I have to fap.

Did we already get today's Italy numbers?

dirty sluts. total slampigs.

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Some Anons better be doing transcription of his speech ITTs.

The cure

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They need your good crem to live

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That is a mark of a female coomer.

Literally who

may you shit again!

call your doctor and tell him you have a severe case of malaria and need hydroxichloroquine RIGHT NOW.

go to pharmacy and buy it with your new prescription from doctor

yes
LOTS of infected
LOTS of deaths

>
just

Like bricks for making houses? Why? What is the context?

With Italy's update we have broken 1000 deaths A DAY!
CONGRATULATIONS CORONA-CHAN!

Yea, shits fucked over 5k. More than yesterday

COOOOOOOOM
2D was the best gift ever given to us in this digital world.

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Community laundry?

i knew it was gonna be empty but it didnt think it was gonna be EMPTY empty

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are you sure they're slutty?
t. trying to get my dick wet and have some matches that have those nose rings

UPDATED NUMBERS

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copa del mundo soon

They were still N95 masks, just rated for construction instead of medical

Idk why, but you can get preparation h wet wipes on amazon still if you’re really desperate

Man. I'm dumbfounded, how did you guys manage to do it?

>Italy surpass China already
HOLY SHIT

Reminder that by the time the dust settles US will have the highest total of deaths, cases, and collateral damage by the end of this.
USA
>USA
USA

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they are alive.

Toilet paper holocaust in my city

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CHINKY WINKY VIRUS
FLYING CHINK AIDS

based cube head