I can't find any shitting paper anymore. Went to 3 stores at 8am. Bread and Milk and Canned Food is also gone. Now i have to take a shit and wash my ass in the shower.
Why are people freaking out so much?
They act like it's the end of the world. Fuck these retards.
How long is this madness going to last?
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Bought a pack yesterday at Lidl.
>I can't find any shitting paper anymore
You have to whore your ass for it, now.
Should have listened to Yas Forums instead of t_d
Washing your ass with soap and water and then washing your hands clean is superior to smearing shit on your asshole with dry paper in every possible way.
39 rolls here
wait till the water gets turned off
Hold in your poop at work and then just take a quick shower everytime you have to poop when you get home.
You all laugh when I say yeah, I run a dollar tree but I'm sitting on 240 packages of ass wipe. Who's laughing now shitpants. I'm wiping my ass like a kang.
In Russia we have a joke on it now.
Why toilet paper in shortage?
Cos On every one coughed five shit their pants in fear.
380 rolls family of three here. At our current rate of use we'll be out in 2 weeks.
I'm starting to panic, guys.
Cat food is also gone. WTF is going on? I hope Amazon will deliver cat food in time else my Cat will have to eat the few meat i have left. Fucking retards hoarding shit like crazy....fuck them.
>Now i have to take a shit and wash my ass in the shower.
Wow nigger, that's the first time in your life when you don't smell like shit and your arse is clean of the dingleberries.
Wait until the Alcohol Toiletpaper and Firearms department starts tracking down the tp hoarders
True Amerishart patriots
Then you and a friend can take turns peeing on each others buttholes to clean them. It's not gay if it's neccessary.
>Why are people freaking out so much
Stay at home boomers+Twitter
Why you no eat cat?
>Why are people freaking out so much?
There's real money and then there's fake user. Learn the difference. It could save your bum.
380 rolls, 3 people and 2 weeks? What the fuck are you doing? Eating that toilet paper?
We're 3 here and we have 20 rolls, will last for a month topkek
I don't know what shithole town you live in but the water system which supplies me requires little to no supervision nor maintenance.
op has all the rapeugees stealing the asswipe to troll him
ALOHA SNAKBAR
Germans really can't recognize a joke if it took a shit in their face.
I know plenty people who need 2-3 rolls a week, you never take anything as a joke when you know people like this
I bought 80 dollars worth of toilet paper when found one store that had it. Two carts full, I didnt get food because I figured I had a few more days before lock down. OOps
>I bought 80 dollars worth of toilet paper
Why the fuck are you so retarded? Fuck you, you make live miserable for rational people like me and force us to hoard this stuff too.
Just poop at work
>How long is this madness going to last?
As long as it takes for enough boomers to drop dead.
Heдooцeнeнный пocт - мaмa вчepa paccкaзывaлa
>not working somewhere they have mass quantities of toilet paper and swiping some when no one is looking.
How will you fags survive when things really hit the fan
Nigga, you never needed that much ass paper. I bought tons of shotgun shells, .33 ammo, and .45s. That's 10 times more useful than some ass paper that will be back on the shelves by Wednesday
>swiping some when no one is looking.
I'm not a stealing nigger like you.
>work part-time as a grocery stocker
>get first pick of all the toilet rolls
finally, my wageslaving pays off
Tiananmen Square Massacre
What, you gonna blast the poop off?
Just hop in the shower. Or I just grab some leaves from outside. That or I just shoot someone who hoarded toilet paper and take it for myself
More Euros are printed then toilot paper.
Wipe your ass with Euros
>How long is this madness going to last?
2 months now in Japan without toilet paper, glue or some other chemicals is probably made in china and out of stock,
Don't you all have those automatic bidet toilet seats?
>Why are people freaking out so much?
Media hype and misleading statistics.
Generally being poorly handled by most governments - lockdown just delays the inevitable while causing social unrest and disruption.
Peer pressure and a chain reaction of idiocy - "if others are hoarding, I should too otherwise I'll be left out."
>Now i have to take a shit and wash my ass in the shower.
Yeah dude. Not bad is it? Using so much TP is bad for the environment anyway. Just eat healthy, lots of fibre, and hop in the shower if it's a messy job.
>How long is this madness going to last?
Probably at least a few months until people in lockdowns get bored and try to come out and their governments enact martial law, causing riots and social unrest. After which it will be several more months until we finally get a vaccine at some point next year.
By 2025 people will have forgotten about this and gone back to their wasteful, entitled lives. Or hopefully society can change for the better as a result; I think this is going to be the wake-up call the US really needs to show them their health system is shit and unsustainable, maybe it will change in the future.
great joke I'm using it
I was out yesterday and saw teens running up to old white folk and hugging them
make wetwipes to stretch your supply
Probably funnier in English
Based survivalist
Rate my TP stash.
Why is there a blond whore on toiletpaper?
because we're still a majority white country unlike you, mohammed.
X doubt
The Great Shartening is upon us. Trust the plan fellow sharts
Reasonable/10.
People been buying like 10-15 packs....fucking retards.
find a construction site, and take the toilet paper from the portable toilets they use.
>one fucking ply?
No.
I have a shit load, pun, of paper here. I made sure I'll get most of the toilet paper than anyone else in my community. So fore, two 12x12 storage units packed from concrete floor to ceiling (15ft height I believe.)
And I have an arsenal of legal weapons so if any dirty asses try to get my shit, bang bang.
what are you going to do during week 2
they knew what they were doing
Wipe my ass with rocks, mashallah.
Be honest. You're larping, you aren't going to shoot anyone in any situation outside of your dreams and fantasies.
Get an old rusty pot of water. Place next to the toilet. When you're done shitting, use your finger to dig out the shit. Rinse it in the pot. Then repeat until your asshole is as clean as your father's mouth is before my dick goes into it.
I have a guy who runs a truck that goes into a local Costco. I get some packs and sling them on the street for $8 a roll and give him a 20% cut of the profit.
I want to find out the logic behind a few things that the panic mode people are hoarding:
Toilet Paper: The big #1 head scratcher on my list. Are Americans so obsessed with wiping their asses? Worse comes to worse, just jump in the shower after you shit, or use a bidet attachment like other civilized nations do. Blow your nose into the sink or shower if you need to.
Bottled Water: I know some retard Americans refuse to drink tap water because they believe all of the bottled water marketing saying that tap water is “dirty”, but it’s literally impossible for the virus to contaminate a tap water source. Most of the water treatment is done by machines. Do they think that the local government will just suddenly cut the tap water supply?
Canned goods: This makes sense to a degree. You’d maybe need enough for 14 days of lockdown, assuming FEMA does not deliver food supplies. But I’m talking about the people who buy a whole shelf of canned beans and 40lbs of rice. Do they think that there’s going to be a mandatory military lockdown for months where anyone who opens the door to their house is shot?