Is this the final solution to the 2020 TP shortage?

I use cleaning solutions but not after every single shit.

I've used them in the USA. At hotels and homes. Maybe you're just out of touch?

Have installed one of these, my asshole has never been cleaner.
Poop
Spray
Wipe
Spray
Wipe
Spotless, clean, fresh asshole.
Wiping with toilet paper alone is nigger tier.

Why do you use toilet paper at all?

To check for poo spots & pat my ass dry.

What "poo spots"?
You need to work on your technique.

After living in Thailand for many years I can't go back to Toilet Paper. Hey, lets just smudge the shit away.. Yeah, I'll pass. Men have hairy assholes. Toilet Paper doesn't get all the shit off. You feel really clean when you use a hose.

>visit Australia
>sorry m8 can't flush toilet paper septic tank will go critical
>nervous about using someone else's shit hose
>press lever
>a stream of spiders sprays out
>can feel them swarm my parting and groin
>each spider bites me multiple times and the pain is outstanding
>they all get coated in my feces as they swarm
>as then venom from the spider bites takes hold passout
>wake up to a bushman playing the didgeridoo and rubbing inferior marmite they call vegemite into my spider bites
>despite this my arse has never been cleaner

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They are gouging the price of bidets right now. I was looking at it earlier for another thread. The bidet I paid $23 for in a guest bathroom is now $80 on Amazon.

Are you retared?
I literally went to home depo/obi/praktiker and bought
1. water valve 1/2
2. Copper water splitter 1/2
3. Shower hose 1/2
4. Bidet sprinkler head with a button.

There! Watch the video, don't buy branded crap.

Amateur barbarians it's time to use the 3 seashells.
This defeats the TP Jew.

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Let me explain further.

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We‘re moving in a few weeks and the new place has a bidet. Starting to consider to keep it but the idea of a toilette spraying water up my ass is a bit disgusting. Do you get used to that? Is the water cold?

mine just came in the mail and my but feels nice i think i may be gay now what do?

You'll get used to it after a few goes and you'll never go back to toilet paper.

Just...just pray the gay away, bro.

You get used to it and you never get swamp ass again.
Try living in a very hot and humid environment. You always have to deal with sweat. With a bidet hose, you can give your balls a clean while you are down there. Never have to deal with sweat, Dingle-berries, jock itch, shit stuck on your hair, wondering if you got it all. You are just clean 100%.

I'd never go back.

Yes, it’s based and high IQ
Also cleans my hairy ass much faster than tp ever could

Aside from being based on the WQ, NQ, and JQ, Islam is correct on the Bidet Question.

Enjoy your Tp shortage, sharter

I also do this. Have to remember to keep tp around so as not to appear as a poopy butted autist to the normies.

Here’s a pasta to post in every thread regarding bidets

Pros
>cleaner ass
>much faster to clean ass
>multi-use, can use to wash your toilet
>usable for as long as there is water supply
>one time payment of $15-20, easy to install
>third worlders can use it, you should also be able to

Brainlet Cons
>teehee family use it too teehee then it must be oh dirty teehee and i never wash hands after taking shit either way teehee xddddd
>teehee ur gay if u splash water on butt teehee XDDD
>oheeheeheeI have 50 IQ so when I use it, it splashes shit all over the bathroom teehee XDDD
>eheuheuhuh me believe u need to dry ass with tp even though your ass evaporates the water within minutes

Actual cons
>people might not feel comfortable with putting on pants over a wet ass

Dude, dry your nethers before zipping up.

Just install a bidet you unclean pigs. It has existed for centuries, what in the actual fuck is your excuse?

I feel comfortable.
You can get used to it quickly.

I don't have space for a separate bidet.

>>eheuheuhuh me believe u need to dry ass with tp even though your ass evaporates the water within minutes
Roasties in yoga pants have a legitimate concern here. Another black mark against degeneracy. Wear dresses, ladies.

Jeans are fine too and don't show any marks.

I wash my arse over the sink with an old washer and some soap, have done so for years now.

Hahahahahaha

I wipe my ass with my bare hand. Then I use profuse amounts of hand sanitizer. That’s what you guys all do right?

What's so funny?
Buying a branded bidet is retarded. Build your own for pennies.

>underrated movie
But how would you flush one, let alone three sea shells, user?

I've done it, but the washer works better.

Honestly you people laugh at toilet paper hoarders, but you really dont have enough toilet paper yourselves. The average person uses 1 roll per day. If you have a family of 4, that's 28 rolls a week. Over 100 a month. TP rolls will be worth their weight in gold in a few months, because everyone needs it.

>cheeked
Yes, the old “turtle walk, plop and mop” method. I see the appeal, plus I’m running out of sanitizer

Yea you get used to it very quickly. You will never again clean your ass with TP only after using water. I have my shower next to the toilet. I just take the shower head, adjust the water stream to a optimal diamaeter for asshole cleaning and spray my ass for like a minute. Nothing cleans the asshole better than that. I can't believe I used to clean it with toilet paper only for the majority of my life. Western ass cleaning practices are clearly lagging behind even to less developed countries.

I wipe with TP and then get a shower. I always poo in the morning and then take a cold shower.
My poo tends to be sticky (I have a normal diet, vegetables, meat, fruits, potatoes, fish, nuts, cheese) so it asks for a lot of wiping and cleaning so I wipe first to remove the most so I don't have to remove large amounts of sticky feces in and from my hand.

I only use some tp to dry my ass, so the underwear/pants don't get wet.

So you have to take all your clothes off every time you shit?

Sometime it’s so sticky I have to wipe the INSIDE of my butthole. One finger, circular motion. Usually does the trick by the fifth or sixth iteration.

wait what, you guys don't have pic related?
I thought Poland was late to the party due to communism and poverty when I got one myself 15 years ago

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I literaly have no space for a full bidet detup, hence shower head.

Enjoy your skid marks and clogged toilet, leaf

>considering for a second getting rid of infinite ads cleaning when there's a global pandemic steeple TP hoarding happening

Same, had the plumber ask me if I was muslim because I had no tp in the house.

Britbong here, living in Spain. TP really isn't a problem, since everyone here has bidets. Ever since I started using a bidet to clean my asshole, I feel disgusting if I don't clean my asshole with water every time

Pic related is GOAT. There is literally nothing better than this. Turn it on, turn it off, wipe with a little bit of TP and you're done, no matter what kind of abysmal shit you just took.

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Not at all. I just place the showerhead under my ass and spray water into my shit stained asshole while the water is pouring back into the toilet. There is no water escaping out of the toilet. It goes into and around my asshole and then into the toilet. All clothes stay dry. I just dry my butt cheeks with tp and that's it.

>the current state of ameribraps

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What if you shit on the attachment itself? Externa hose is better.