>user get off the computer and come to bed
User get off the computer and come to bed
If she were my wife, I would use the computer to find another.
Honey get off the bed and get on the fucking treadmill.
m-mommy...?
>take your fucking clothes off right now
I wish
Tfw no slampig gf. Why even live
Unpopular Opinion: Her fatness is not the deal-breaker. The deal breaker is that her makeup looks weird and she looks old too.
Even men who are okay with big ladies will usually admit that they have a limited shelf life.
NO FAK U!
get on the scale and give me some head
so that's a typical white woman. i'll stick to fucking thai ladyboys.
I'd give her the fucking of her life, then give her a fake number and leave.
Sigh... *unzips*
part and parcel, fren
lool
"user, did you say you hate Syrians? What about me? Do you hate me too?"
Soon as you're done with your 10 mile run, fat.
Especially.
Fpbp!
Built for...dare I say?
>Hold up, I'm ordering some pizzas!
I want to marry a woman like that.
I saw Ryan Gosling at a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.
He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?”
I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen packages of toilet paper in his hands without paying.
The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.
When she took one of the packages and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually, roll by roll, “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each roll and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by coughing really loudly.
Aye lad, she be a whale. But the hour be late, and her blowhole be wet.
what a prick
damn. too close to my "honey, get on a diet and leave the bed".
I don't know if I would fuck her or not
No, the bed will collapse. Also who are you you fat hog? Get the fuck out of my apartment.... No! Stay the fuck out of the fridge!
Fpbp
And you may ask yourself
How do I work this?
And you may ask yourself
Where is that large automobile?
And you may tell yourself
This is not my beautiful house!
And you may tell yourself
This is not my beautiful wife!
Would.
>>>
> Anonymous (ID: Ijwp45Wt) 03/15/20(Sun)16:34:32 No.248169004▶
> (OP)
built for BBC
lel
There is no deal breaker, shes prime thicc mommy. You know nothing.
What a fat fuck. She probably has that fat people sour smell.
*sniff sniff*
That's not my bed. I would never sleep on that bed.
the check-out girl just flew over my house
kino taste
i would but there's no room.
"Hello police there's a pig on my bed claming to be my wife or girlfriend and it's telling me to come bed...."
FPBP
OP's pic is fucken unhealthy and disgusting
everyone on this board who would not fuck her
is gay. face it.
Fuck her tits then I’m out
Who's got the Brosnan pic? You know the one
Lurk for two years, newfaggots
BBC
Can most of you admit that if this was your woman you'd probably plug her once in a while, but be bored because having teh woman doesn't interest most of you as much as bitching about not having her?
>I'm almost leveled mom just a few more minutes
That depends on how good the head and anus are at sucking.
Wtf is that shit
Married couple live on a farm together.
One day, the husband bursts through the door in front of his wife with a chicken in his hands.
"Honey, I've been fucking this pig here for years" he says.
His wife responds "but honey, that's a chicken"
And then the husband says "shut up bitch, I wasn't talking to you"
You look like a can of popped biscuits you fat whore
Where do you stick it?
Fucking disgusting
This.
If you guys really can't do better than that I feel bad for you. It would be easier to be an incel than fuck a woman like that.
Slampigs are for the strong
Add fuck anything at this point
confirmed homosexual
I'm having the staunch realization that every woman gets disgusting and that I'll have to be loaded to still have sex with hot ones. I'm gonna go guys
That reminds me, gotta defrost the turkey.
being fat makes you look older so her age is a toss up really.
hate this cunt so much
I have a very low humor threshold. I LOL'd.
There’s a difference between is this the best you can do or would you fuck.
can i get back on the computer after i give mummy my cummy?
Words of wisdom
BASED FATTY KILLER
Your a fag if you wouldnt
why?
Gross. I'd sleep on the couch if that thing was in my house.
Look at those big ass tiddies tho.
Most canadians are.
GET BACK ON THE PELOTON YOU FAT BITCH
>start sucking my dick, I have one more urgent thing to finish here. It would not take long.
No leaf not everyone wants to fuck farm animals as much as you
Shut up whore! Jack me off with those fat ass tits instead!
>I have one more urgent thing to finish here
Shitposting that Viro is Nordic?
I'll say pass
Kek
Viro? WTF?
Estonia is not Nordic.
Get your fucking shoes off the bed you fat fucking cow!
disgusting. id rather sleep outside
no
she hates australia