/cvg/ - Corona Virus General #2036

i have it.

Flipbros...
When mass gatherings are banned and close contact is discouraged.
Our idiots are truly remarkable. At least they're getting paid right? KEK

Corona-chan, take them all please!

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Tell me lads, how bad it really? T-this is all just gonna blow over, r-right? I-I mean, the flu kills more people than this, r-right?

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not feeling too well bros

so, can someone explain in which moment we beat the argies?

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rip

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We will be but a footnote, user. They'll wank the politicians and organizations instead.

I love you friends

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I just saw this. Covid appears worse than the virus in this film, since it can transmit through breathing alone. I'm scared af bros, I don't want to die.

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Shh. They arent testing anymore. All pneumonia deaths now go to the flu

>youtube.com/watch?v=k7IakX-f_3w

3 nurses and 1 physician tested positive at evergreen hospital in kirkland tonight, one of them is hospitalized. they dont know if they were infected in the hospital or from community spread outside. news will break in the morning.

Females are what started this fucking curse

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REMINDER: 3 cups of rice is way fucking more than it looks like

mobile.twitter.com/DavidBegnaud/status/1238677815517687811

Why doesn't he want to know?
If I had access to unlimited testing I would be doing anal swabs on the daily.

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chi chi chi le le le !!!

>haitians

>I don't want to die.
Gb2Reddit

First time cooking rice, white boy?

Does the virus spread easily on surfaces?

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Jesus christ I fucking hate this shithole

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her right arm looks like a big uncircumcized dick

>no over 40
>but still German
You died inside a long time ago, Hans

We should respect her like the Catholic respect their goddess Mary.

I love you too!

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two cup of dried chickpeas is a massive amount of chickpeas when soaked.

we just have first world problems

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>Daily per capita reality check
Italy remains the worst affected on a per capita basis, with 0.029% of the population infected. Germany has surpassed France now in the top 10 for infection rate, but is still at a very low 0.0044%. Only 0.0007% of the United States has gotten infected, including repatriated Americans from overseas.
>Still way less serious than the flu

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Stop this shit, you fag. The time for love is over. There's no love where we're going.

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Bro its everywhere in seattle/Everett/auburn. My friend has it and they sent him home twice without testing him. Hes probably gonna die . 21year old virgin skinny male

gringoladia or mexico?

Uncanny.

Lol, it’s a very late abortion

archive.4plebs.org/pol/thread/238417111
This is the post that starts it all

Three cups of rice is enough for a whole family the whole day. More than enough if it's American-sized cup.

t. SEAchad

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>no videos of chaos from Italy, Japan, South Korea
>three countries where everybody has a fucking phone and internet
>...nothing

Hmm... I'm starting to think this is less than a nothingburger. Is Corona-chan... dare I say it... a hoaxburger? Where's the beef? Not a single webm of shit going down in Italy?

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uh oh explain this happeningfags?

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Yes. Even money can be blessed by Corona-chan.

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Two cups of rice dried is usually what I use to make six servings of a recipe.

Young people don't die from this

I cant make up my mind

Somethingburger - 145,810 cases

nothingburger - 145,810 cases.

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This is going to go down as the biggest overreaction incited by media joke of all time.

it last long as shit on carboard, 2-3 days on plastics iirc, and some time on metals. google it.

LISTEN! This is not serious illness. It is just the flu. Rather than buying supplies, water, food, items you need to be focused on just being rational person.

Follow your government protocols and tips. Do not try to handle this by yourself-experts know better.

If you are ill, simply isolate yourself until better, and avoid contact with outsiders.

If you have questions and concerns about this disease, do not browse the Yas Forums; rather, study official government and international organizations! Try not to panic about this, as it will blow over. Just look at the Dow jones! complete surge.

who.int/health-topics/coronavirus\
cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/index.html
bbc.com/news/world-europe-51876784

here is good MAP!
arcgis.com/apps/opsdashboard/index.html#/bda7594740fd40299423467b48e9ecf6

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Was thinking the same.

youtube.com/watch?v=zm3UwwFXKmU

>Why doesn't he want to know?
He is being tested even if they say otherwise. He is the president. They can't say that they are testing him while he presents no symptoms, because that would draw a clear contradiction to everything they have told the citizens of our country, which is that there is no need for testing if you are asymptomatic.

Dead cats are bouncy.

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Reminder that we're fucked
(death log chart)

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Put me in the historical screencap. All people from the future are niggerfaggots.

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If I catch this shit or one of my loved one does, I'll declare my own eternal crusade against chinks and the french gov.

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How many threads since Gary got the most epic get? 4 threads? 5 threads?

MORALE CHECK

How's everyone feeling ?

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Exactly. 75% of the cases are in Lombardi aka Chink central yet the media is shilling the narrative Italy's healthcare system is collapsed.

Hello Gary my old friend....

ok mossad

yep that's why they wear hazmats

FRIENDLY REMINDER
>FRIENDLY REMINDER
FRIENDLY REMINDER
>FRIENDLY REMINDER

In pic related the nothingburger previous predictions.

>They failed under every aspect: number predictions, fatality rates, pandemic spread, markets tank.

DON'T GIVE THEM YOU'S, they are shills and will deny in any circumstances that they were wrong.
They will repeat over and over the same talking points (plateauing, slowing down, just a flu, markets green) on every occasion when random fluctuations of the numbers are slightly favorable to their narration.
They will disappear as soon as the situation is worsening just to reappear in droves when the waters calmed down a bit.
JUST IGNORE

>archive.4plebs.org/pol/thread/241647964/#q241650629

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>Trump declared a national emergency and calmed down markets
>The fed dumped $1.5T into the markets yesterday
>Bailouts of the airline industry, cruise industry, hotel industry among others are essentially guaranteed
>We're beginning to do 2008 tier stock market prop up shit
And now you know why they went up a lot today. Don't take muh stock market as any indicator of anything.

Hey there Hongkonger
I was thinking today
When covid is all over, and all the world is turning against mainland China from the death toll...
How long do you think you have until the PLA hordes roll in from Shenzhen?

(((filename)))

>1 day time scale
>not noise

S O F T

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Trump is a good leader

Shut up memeflagger

Feels pretty kino.
>pic-related

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At the bugout ranch now , good security and thankfully these people can't afford to prep.
I did all my shopping in two days and literally filled two vans full of whatever the fuck I wanted. They still have hand sanitizer for fucks sake.

Cannot explain these levels of comfy

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>I just saw this. Covid appears worse than the virus in this film, since it can transmit through breathing alone. I'm scared af bros, I don't want to die.
The hollywood virus MEV-1 killed 28 million people. Covid-19 will kill 3 times as many.

Post yfw racist boomers are getting DABBED ON
LMAO

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Volatility has returned to the market

that 6 ply hits different ngl

What did they mean by this?
youtube.com/watch?v=N9PgsRYH-K0

Oops, I fucked up and put the wrong date on the graph. This is definitely March 13 data, not March 12. I'll have a new version for the new bread.

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well shit
our governemt officials are scared shitless of Corona-kami

Why are niggers like you so fooled ?
The Fed pump it, on monday shits are going down again. This is just a dead cat bounce

28 days on stainless steel at 4°C (39F).
9 days in less ideal circumstances.

fuck off chang i dont normally buy these 12 lb bags, the package usually just tells me how long to microwave

>work in a hospital
>in emergency room no less
>got to carry a sample of suspected COVID to get tested

I probably got it now haha

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>Detected: 145,810
FUCK YEAH
BIGGER!

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Sick

Okay, tell his blood soaked Kleenexs that

If Rocklahoma is cancelled due to coronachan I'm gonna riot

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literally an insect, were asians(chinks) seeded by some INSECTOID alian race? seems plausible to me

They're wearing them ironically

>Microwaveable rice
Yikes.

/comfy/ and /prepped/

Xi is ready for his blowjob from you user. We’ll still be here when you finish

>Historians are going to read our CVG from start to finish and write about each and every one of us shitposters
Niggers tongue my anus

I saw it too.. I thought why is there a dick in her cup

Does wearing gloves, changing them often and doing it the right way actually do anything?

Bull trap.

Probably for the better.
>meanwhile in Indonesia

Feds are giving 1.5 trillion in loans to banks or something. Basically artificially keeping stonks afloat until next wednesday or so, at the cost of inflation.

high, i have warned everyone around me

but they didnt listened

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And Yas Forums ate it right up. I thought you guys were smart?

Bugmen gonna bug

Coachella is cancelled and I'm fucking mad because I don't get my girl Miku.

Mortality rate

Using the figures from this live update:
youtube.com/watch?v=qgylp3Td1Bw

China: 3.9456%
Confirmed cases: 80,824

Italy: 7.1687%
Confirmed cases: 17,660

Iran: 4.5230%
Confirmed cases: 5,682

South Korea: 0.8904%
Confirmed cases: 8,086

Spain: 2.5420%
Confirmed cases: 5,232

Germany: 0.2008%
Confirmed cases: 3,984

France: 2.1543%
Confirmed cases: 3,667

The United States: 2.1862%
Confirmed cases: 2,287

Switzerland: 0.9657%
Confirmed cases:1,139

Norway: 0.1004%
Confirmed cases: 996

Sweden: 0.1229%
Confirmed cases: 814

The Netherlands: 1.243%
Confirmed cases: 804

Denmark: 0%
Confirmed cases: 801

The United Kingdom: 1.3732%
Confirmed cases: 801

Japan: 2.8610%
Confirmed cases: 734

You beat the argies long ago with harder to understand spanish and exceeding your natural potentials.
Viva pinochet

Your TP, my TP

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praise the new god

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I brought lunch almost as sweet as you guys

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Coachella was postponed.

>user nRggfag7 writes back in January
>STOP ALL FLIGHTS NOW. IT WILL STOP THE SPREAD
>we found he was right, but they didn't listen
>He also said something about "traps being gay". We suspect this was about home defense and how he didn't think they were effective

DEAD

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Just stay away from adrenochrome. No fear.

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You're the guy that's frozen in Pompey that's beating off or the fuck you on a random roman 100 bc stall

first time here?

Only worthwhile response in this entire thread.

Based upside-down Indonesian.

why are your gov.officials so arrogant?
aren't they aware that even here in the tropics, She remains exponentially fucking infectious?

>Everyone travelling to NZ from overseas need to self-isolate. All travellers, except for those from the Pacific islands, will have to self-isolate for 14 days on their arrival to New Zealand.
>except for those from the Pacific islands
filthy coconut lovers

Anxious and restless. If I was the only person I had to worry about I'd probably be comfy like I guess everyone else here.

How is my OC?

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GOOD

Get checked and get comfy

No one ever listens fren

GIGA KEK

The Great Depression didn't really start until 1930. Crash was in '29.

CORONA CHAN HAS BEEN NOTICED IN : THE UNITED STATES

CURE TO BE RELEASED September 11th 2020

Let it be true or I will just go get coofed on. I have nothing to live if my love dies from this virus. She is not the healthiest girl

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don't waste them, depends on what your doing when you have them on. Work? or at home?

House just passed the relief bill, senate and trump still need to pass and sign it.

Fed intervention in the economy

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We'll be just like the graffiti channers in pompei, but better

SIXTH NEW ZEALAND CASE CONFIRMED

newshub.co.nz/home/new-zealand/2020/03/coronavirus-nz-s-sixth-case-confirmed.html

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They are bought by the chinks. They are doing everything to avoid offending chinks. Revealing the full reality of Corona-chan would render every single chink a persona non grata here.

Those digits

Fuck niggers

where were you yesterday

>7/10
Enslave her.

What does TP say about marrying your cousin? Asking for a friend...

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I love you Gary

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good, but im a little scared about having sex earlier.

im supposed to be bunkering alone but....idk lad. hopefully it wont get me ill

Coofing, at work, wife coofing at home, enough food, dog food, and water for a year. I want this to all be over but I know it's just beginning.

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Thanks to bleed edge information technology, we will now have Great Depression in the same year as the crash.

pretty cool

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Holy fuck I thought it was just $1.5T but that's more like $5T. We're gonna be fucking Weimar when this shit is over lmao

actually the chilean spanish is just a bunch of urban slangs and even us cannot understand the poorfags.

>Viva pinochet

PERO QUE ECONOMIA MAS GRANDE!!!

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Anybody have a up to date place to find out the state by state numbers??? BNOnews is good, but their state by state numbers just don't keep up and Worldometer's doesn't even work it looks like.
The US just jumped up another 172 cases to a total of 769, today alone, and I'd like to figure out where the fuck that came from.

theres a bunch of concerts in vermont that are cancelled and the hippies are chimping out

>88
>YFW you forgot to buy TP

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I hope he is ok fren.

fucking china, bro. uuugh

Is it possible that this shit has already been spread earlier and contributed to the deaths that have been caused by the flu earlier this year? I mean, they certainly wouldn't have been testing for this.

thanks virus fren

based image

Tired, going to bed soon only to happily wake up in a more doomed clown world.

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Stfu Nigger.

Is this finally the actual happening I've been waiting for for the past 10 years? Is it finally fucking happening?

Apparently supermarkets were packed today here, so expect a big jump in our numbers in about 4 days.

This. I mostly get new numbers from Yas Forums since BNO and worldometer are slow updating.

>Do not post about virus
that fucking cope

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Well, future historians. I dont know what the world will be like for you, but do know that tribalism can never truly leave. Its deep in the human code. Dont make the mistakes our fathers made. I enjoyed this ride, and hey spend more time getting that girl and less working. You know who you are.

When I'm in public, work especially. I work at a school as a janitor.

Not too bad, going to head home soon from uni now that all the classes are online. Very hyped to get comfy and play Bannerlord

Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

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>These images
I don't know why exactly but due to these two images I imagined a Gijinka of there being toilet paper-chan
As a coomer, imagining a my that I am cooming into a toilet paper and/or tissue chan gives my coomer levels heightened,
Drawfags, get your ass to it and asap, my coomer instincts demand it to be so....

Honestly, you people laugh at toilet paper hoarders, but you really dont have enough toilet paper yourselves. The average person uses 1 roll per day. If you have a family of 4, that's 28 rolls a week. Over 100 a month. TP rolls will be worth their weight in gold in a few months, because everyone needs it.

The GARYBOT fucked up
>The GARYBOT fucked up
The GARYBOT fucked up
>The GARYBOT fucked up
The GARYBOT fucked up

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Is it transmitted by fecal matter? I know several scummy people that shit and do not wash their hands. It's disgusting.

What have you done today to spread it.

Symptoms just kicking in. Not sure if I’m ready for what comes next

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Not possible probable.

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Yes, yes it is. Hope you're manly enough to surf it!

>NIGGER! OBEY THE RULES NIGGER! THANKS FOR YOUR DONATION

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Will this be the meme that is placed in history books?

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Yes, it is. Sorry I was fucking with the muh stonks poster lol

Already gave up, if it happens i guess thats it

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No homo bro.

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it's almost time for a 150k version

>is it happening?
Oh its happening my nigger

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But why the second test

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I'm far away from any metro areas and have a van full of supples. Bretty confy

I happen to have been hanging around here for a while and have happened upon a handful of happenings. and I have to say that this happens to be the most happenings that have ever happened in a single happenig.

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I don't even care, and not in a sad way, just true neutral. Infect me or don't coronachan, just keep the happenings happening.

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This is a based take.
Here's a (you) for the ego stroke.

Tell the dead in their 20s that

So who else here is wondering what your friends who you lost over warning them about Corona-Chan, are thinking right now?

Thank you, that means a lot to me

Is it safe for me to go to the shop early this morning? I'm talking about 7AM so there won't be too many people. I've got a decent stock atm, 9 toilet rolls, 5 handwashes, 8 cans of soup, 5 large pot noodles, 4 packs of pasta, 6 ready meals, milk, coffee, juice, 5 packs of microwave rice, biscuits, toothpaste, sugar, salt, mayo, tuna...

oh doing great here, no troubles at all and just waiting for normies to get panic to laugh.

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>out of 357 deaths... 1 of them was under 50
>4 of them were under 60
>MOST of the deaths were OVER 80 (EIGHTY FUCKING YEARS OLD)

Umm... happeningbros?

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Prepped but disgusting, filthy, roommate won't wash hands after giant shits all day. I'll probably die of ecoli before coronachan gets me.

Gary will be a legend.

I'm almost out of phase one of my food stores, which is fine. All short shelf life stuff. Next phase will actually be tastier I think. Four more phases to go before I have to bug out and live off the land. I wouldn't mind that, but I'm expecting I won't even get through the third phase before this all blows over and I can restock without worry.

wow you worked hard on this, poorfag Ivan.
You'll go back home to a shitty commieblock tonight kek

Shut up Hary.

Anyone know what Putin has had to say about this?

Thanks

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based /cct/ webm

Get some big ass water barrels and fill them with water.

they're remains of one of the previous dominant races that bred with the existing one. like cockroaches they survived each purge and adapted to the new dominant species. where reptilian humanoids died out, insectoid humanoids survived.

>assuming there’ll even be a civilisation to do research at the end of all this

Mfw

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Put me in the research paper. Fuck undergrad researchlets.

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fucking finally.
just finished farming every /cvg/ thread since this morning for new Corona-Chan images.
i really wish Yas Forums had a 500 bump limit at times like this.

Ayylium historian niggers 2 billion years after human extinction:
>Niggers tongue my anus
>What did he meme by this?

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Officially they say PLA can roll in within 10 mins but that would mean the greatest happening we would ever seen, HK with the so called "one country two systems" is basically a facade for china to circumvent many export ban posted by the west, many foreign firms that operate in china based in HK too, china tearing up this veil and let PLA rolling in will certainly mean it is close to WW3

But I doubt it would ever happen, many CCP members including xinne the pooh put their asset heavily in the west and they move their precious family there, muh china stronk is basically a meme they used to fool the brain dead peasants, 1984 is closer than you think

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Mmm dat Body armor

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Based af

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kek.
It will also expand in your stomach, so don't eat too much of it.

Same. I get more legit news from this fucking site than anywhere else. But those other two work well as it is. And I use my states official site when they update.
Can't be bothered to check 48 other state sites though.

Mayor of Miami
Bolsanaro
Bolsanaro aide
Brazilian ambassador
All had dinner with Trump 6 days ago
All have been kissed by Coronachan

>tfw when Dumpf's a superspreader

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Even though you don't need to cos the supply here isn't short due to brexit, 7 am it will be fillling up believe it or not.

>Our bullying of the CCP will be studied in depth to perfect future information dominance strategies.
It feels conflicting. Fuck this clown world.

Yeah this is weird considering what came out of China. Maybe the “whites are immune” theory is real.

1 in 500 between 20-40 die according to WHO

So, it fits.

Jewtube's Recommended in incognito mode is looking a bit strange today.
Starting to see the coronavirus influence.

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Do it faggit. But take down as many as you can...or else don't.