PREP GENERAL THREAD: NATIONAL EMERGENCY EDITION

TOILET PAPER!!!! NOT ENOUGH TOILET PALER!!!!!! GET MORE FUCKING TOILET PAPER!!!!@@!’llnb!!!!!!

>All store brand shit

Attached: bhj.jpg (508x453, 19.61K)

>Some fat NEET hoards guns, ammo and food
>no training or survival skills, only infographs from /k/
>home security sucks, easily bypass all alarms
>me and four other chads break in, hes taking a vodka nap in his fur suit after a hard coming session
>rekt
>rinse and repeat a few times
>I'm now a heartless warlord with a sprawling fortress, execute anyone who even slightly annoys me
>All because of preppers

I think you can get fucked agorophobe

Attached: 1581462322012.jpg (1080x1053, 143.19K)

>he pays more for a name

Attached: 1580967566277.jpg (227x220, 24.54K)

Why do jannies remove Mad Max meme raider threads? What the fuck is up with taking everything seriously?

101 uses look it up

engineer guy made a video
youtube.com/watch?v=I0Ae0mjMljs
observe

Begging? You will be robbed you dumb cunt, don't think you are even remotely manly and deadly with those peashooters

Your stash. All of it.

NOW.

Attached: 1584122741473.jpg (411x746, 44.02K)

Fuck raiders, prepper militia for life

Attached: 982EC5C6-B38D-451A-87ED-E519A5668005.jpg (527x960, 54.78K)

Do you have any idea how much damage you could be doing to your flooring by loading thousands of pounds of weight in a small area?

Don't forget to prep for boredom.

Jews:

Blood Passover Arial toeff:
bloodpassover.com/

Red Symphony
docdro.id/awxXfEB

Manosphere/red pill

Smart and Sexy Roderick Kaine [men are smarter than women]
atavisionary.com/free-book-smart-and-sexy-the-evolutionary-origins-and-biological-underpinnings-of-cognitive-differences-between-the-sexes/

Sexual utopia in power F roger devlin
dontmarry.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/sexualutopia.pdf

The manipulated man estar vilar
dontmarry.files.wordpress.com/2008/08/the_manipulated_man.pdf

Conspiracy
The lifting of the viel [about vast pedo conspiracy controlling the world]
docdroid.net/Dh4yQ08/the-lifting-of-the-veil.pdf

behold a pale horse, bill cooper
docdro.id/oSSjjeB

Imaging 9-11. All the popular media, like comics, which predicted 9-11
docdro.id/sjfan7a

>the following are both available at cia.gov, cause they found it at some mahamadeen compound. Not linking directly there though for obvious reasons.

bloodlines of the illuminati
docdro.id/CRTbzb0

The conspirator's hierarchy Dr. Coleman
docdro.id/tBlM2rv

Spiritual/kooky/blahblah

lawofone.info/

Alien disclosure
docdroid.net/192biis/cosmic-disclosure-full-transcripts.pdf

2150 AD [reincarnation fiction]
docdro.id/ercmHPd

Attached: MexicanCorona.jpg (780x1024, 118.62K)

Jesus fuck
You're not gonna need all that toiled paper after the second bucket of Mac and cheese.
>Tfw fully stocked for boogaloo but you have an impacted colon

Attached: 1583034177046.jpg (1358x909, 324.2K)

That is... until you meet this Chad.

Attached: 1584125304024.jpg (1027x1572, 294.03K)

Hahahahahaha look everyone he can't even own a gun!!!

>larping with a fucking airsoft gun
lol you could’ve bought an actual useful gun with how much you spent on your larp equipment you fucking idiot

My friend at the state department in Washington state said the lockdown is happening.

Warlords of the apocalypse vs Prepper Militiamem vs Fed remnants, who would win the war for the wastelands?

That exterior door is flimsy. Cool gear though.

Jannies keep banning and shutting down Meme raider threads.

Thats how afraid they are.

Fucking beta incels

Attached: 4563c.jpg (1462x1462, 189.08K)

who is your friend? now is not the time for secrets

>oxygen tanks
based. You can use them to breathe while sick, or use it as a makeshift bomb.

>raiders get fucked
*runs out of supplies*
>guess I'll just starve
Everyones a raider when the shit hits the fan

I'm prepping by being engaged with my community, sharing information, watching out for vulnerable people, checking in on the elderly via phone, and paying close attention to all information outlets. These fags are gonna feel really dumb when this whole thing blows over.

Holy fuck I am jealous of this prep

I'm invading your nation first if shtf.

>TOILET PAPER!!!! NOT ENOUGH TOILET PALER!!!!!! GET MORE FUCKING TOILET PAPER!!!!@@!’llnb!!!!!!

I fucking hate these idiot panic buying boomers. Went to do my normal weekly shopping and they cleaned out all the milk, bread, and of course toilet paper! WTF are these fucks going to do with mass quantities of toilet paper and perishables like milk and bread? As long as I have soap and access to running water, I can live without God damn toilet paper. Most boomers are mindless fucking retards!

Attached: img_2723.jpg (640x476, 108.95K)

IT HAS BEGUN

THE GREAT HAPPENING OF OUR TIMES

Attached: 1584127521517.jpg (3024x4032, 2.68M)

Why? Because we'll have to just eat the food and wipe our asses? We'll use it anyways.

Giant cans of perishables seems pretty fucking stupid for two people.

Top fucking god damned kek

This picture makes me proud for some reason.

A fucking leaf commenting on anything

Attached: 1583075180683.jpg (410x413, 11.52K)

Attached: ETApUj2U4AAsmpK.jpg (714x960, 52.37K)

real and gay.

its women panicking because they dont have a man around to tell them to calm down and shut up. Women use 3 rolls of toilet paper every time they pee.

gave me a good chuckle
based

Washington is Next.

I can see why a gay couple would need so much toilet paper.
Especially given that you plan on eating all that chilli

1. When was your last dental checkup?
2. How often are you guys shaving?
3. How many people know about your prep stash?

Attached: 3M6800.jpg (1200x1200, 140.31K)

Imagine not trying to be a harmless threat. The US will not be lawless. It will be a complete police state when SHTF. You and your guns will be seen as a threat -- they already know where you have them and where you live. You signaled to the government that you are to be taken care of first.

holy based

>3 months after the US has shut down completely
>millions dead, no one left to clean up the bodies
>walmarts and targets have long since been looted
>you need to poop but alas your measly 100 pack of toilet paper has long since run out
>you know what you have to do
>you head out at dawn to the new mansion of the toilet czar
>every town has one. The one man who thought ahead and loaded up on as much TP as possible
>he control the TP, and has gotten rich because of it
>took over the biggest home in the area, 24/7 armed guards, lives like a fucking king. No one dares cross him. Without him, no TP can be found for miles
>you approach his compound, your bowels quivering
>embarassed, you are escorted to him
>he is sitting on a throne of TP. More than you've ever seen in your life. The thing you need so badly he is treating like a worthless commodity
>you let out a jealous fart, it stings your eyes
>"Speak, serf" he commands
>"I... I need some TP... Please..." you manage to squeak out
>"Some TP please WHAT!?" He bellows down to you
>if you weren't already clenching your ass you probably would have shit yourself from the booming power of his voice
>"P-please.... Y-your highness..." you moan, it won't be long now
>"And what is thine offer?" He asks, turning his head
>"A-anything you want your highness... Anything... Please..." you grab your stomach, you're running out of time
>The graceful TP Czar realizes the predicament. He plucks off half a roll of TP and spits on it. Then throws it to you. He laughs. The guards laugh. His concubines laugh. You pick it off the ground. it's dirty and wet.
>"We'll be in touch." He chuckles as you run out from his palace in fear, embarrassment, and pain

>imagine this level of gatness existing before 2020
welcome to the future folks, the future of cringe.

also my stash = yours*5 food/ammo get fucked nigger

How about you share some of that food with the elderly so they don't have to go to the store and risk certain death? That will make you a hero in the community and that's a good way to consolidate local political power. But you're probably just selfish antisocial twats who don't give a fuck about anyone but yourself.

Damn user. You're doing alright. I imagine you'll get more than a few blow jobs with that stash.

Why do boomers think they are invincible? I have a good and well prepped setup here but my parents are going to fuck it up despite my warnings.

sorry I forgot that's snack-sized for you

*GAYNESS/gatness

Big kek!

Attached: 1506813491439.jpg (800x804, 55.76K)

More importantly...

DID YOU HAVE YOUR APPENDIX REMOVED?

>can see the toilet paper is running out
>doesn't order more

Who's the stupid now.

>Women use 3 rolls of toilet paper every time they pee.
Confirmed. I nicely asked my wife if she could limit herself to two squares when peeing. She buys the thickest, cushiest, plushest god-damned TP I've ever seen. Nope, she will continue to use a fucking huge wad anytime she pleases. She does have a nice big asian bush though, so I do understand the need for a thorough drying.

You had it right with gatness.

How much more food do I need if my goal is to last three months without having to shop if necessary? I'm not worried about water since I don't expect utilities to shut off and I have a sawyer mini filter for if the quality of the water decreases as plant staff go home

Attached: unknown.png (724x712, 97.77K)

11 years ago, yes

i surrender, zorro

I NEED TP

Attached: 1200px-NPC.svg.png (1200x1462, 91.51K)

no thats why i had to correct it.

Imagine the poor shit who gets into that random bad luck situation during the pandemic. I shudder to think.

>Tips fedo- gets fucking wasted by 20 5.56 rounds pumped into his lanky body.

It sums up my view on this Boomrona Virus.
They probably already have, they got stormed by idiots who think 6 months worth of toilet paper is the most important thing.

Attached: 27B2D84E-F6E2-4823-9660-8DA93E69E945.jpg (2858x3816, 2.05M)

i read the tp name sideways and thought it said Bitch Tissue, good name for a noise rock band

I hate you niggas

>has to plead with wife
>s0i flex
>asian
like clockwork

Also helps with fasting to keep your sodium and bicarbonate levels up.

>not making her shave off that jungle

cuck

>user preps
>gets sent to makeshift hospital
>goods get confiscated by government

Forget prepping and go somewhere warm.

Attached: World temperatues.jpg (922x512, 200.8K)

king

>teleports behind you as your pupils shake in terror

HAI-AI

Attached: 8iacqt2hm6831.jpg (640x640, 44.26K)

Strip the flesh, salt the wound!

crack, obv.

It was the second thing to run out after cleaning products. So yes, something in the supply chain is fucked for TP

My waifu is clean shaving, but still her and our daughter sues the Hell out of it. Can't buy any this week because boomers are hording it all.

Waste that nigger and his guards by throwing a pipe bomb and or Molotov at his home
Toilet paper burns.

helps with heartburn

>opening all the masks and stuff now
>touching and sitting on all the shit you bought at stores touched by 1000 people
>shit is all contaminated
>good job fuckheads
not one of you Yas Forumspanic bean buyers has the fucking sense to keep things separate and disinfected....

Dental. Fuck that noise. Shit's expensive as all hell. Once the dollar collapse, a root canal will cost like one 12 pack of TP.

>all those pooskins
>could be any western country

Attached: shieeet.png (587x352, 312.19K)

Lel

This is the kinda person I'm excited to murder.

Attached: Bog.jpg (478x478, 41.15K)

Kirkland is like 30% cheaper than leading brands and its the same exact shit

the chances of that are lower than catching rabies from a horse

>not buying all of this months ago

user.... the government is not going to be left after directive 51.

OH NO FAGGOT JANNIES WILL BAN AND DELETE

OH NON ONO USA LAW NO O NONONO

That's a solid haul.

I'm sure his homeless pets will try to protect him.

that would last me like a week...

I like big asian bush. Gets my hard as a rock. Over in Japland the womenfolk actually have hair transplant surgery, taking follicles from the back of their head to replenish their balding pubis. A thick bush is a sign of youth and fertility.

lmao what a strange delusion to have. The country is already largely lawless. Police will be the first to fuck off and bunker down in their own homes.

>I tell him, "You're not japanese. He screams and starts to break down, I UNLOAD 30 ROUNDS INTO HIS FUCKING SKULL BEFORE STOMPING CUTTING UP AND FREEZING HIS FUCKING BODY BEFORE EATING HIS EYES AND BURNING THE REST OF HIS CUT UP REMAINS I TAKE HIS ASHES AND FUCKING USE THEM LIKE SALT AND PEPPER.

nice pantry but where is the backup reserve?

hell yes. his pic is fucking elite
nice
raiders suck my dick,
we are going to gut you like pigs

Attached: C3F598A9-7EFA-4E2C-B577-ED1FAA9874A2.gif (500x191, 845.35K)

bought about 1 1/2 month of food for my self, ideally if i could go out again i would buy some more fats and carbs since what i have is protein heavy but with what i have i should be fine for a while

BEWARE OF MEME RAIDERS THAT JANNY FAGGOTS FEAR

BEWARE

ALERT

FEAR THE MEME LARP RAIDER

ALERT

Attached: 1584131662003.jpg (926x683, 113.91K)

Foilies.

From the bottom of my heart man get your shit together. There is no prep here - you've got some crackers, a few fucking cans of chef boyardee, some light(?????) soup cans, and a bit of wine.

Why no video or photos coming from New Rochelle containment zone?

There's already a mom mafia in my neighborhood promising protection for 1 4 pack a week. It's a total racket. But jokes on them. I'll be pimping those roasties out in no time. Bitches don't know the size of my TP stash.

there are more confirmed cases in FL than OH

>imagine actually taking this picture

I started in 2015 (when I moved to the country)
mylar+oxy+buckets.
OK Boomer.

*it's a hologram*

lmao the prepper manchildren are having a field day

watch this become an actual HOLIDAY lmao "time to dress up and go to costco buy packs of shit so we can rejoice in our doomsday fantasies" LMAO this is literally halloween in march

This is all the toilet paper I have left. I’m scared bros. What should I do?

Attached: 6E3C3B5A-9DD9-45FF-982A-9CA089EED373.jpg (4032x3024, 2.33M)

Your stash. NOW.

Attached: tumblr_nknpo07qxV1rg3vrmo5_500.jpg (450x532, 61.14K)

ONE COOF AND IT'S OVER

felon here
bought pic related for hunting and I can't wait to loot poor raider corpses and take their guns
this baby shoots fucking arrows at 680fps
got a nice camo suit too
come find me in the front yard motherfucker
better spot me quick

Attached: dragon-claw-dual-tank-twang-n-bang-combo-40.jpg (900x643, 24.52K)

Based. Make sure to get M885 if you're running with 5.56. They have the most penetration. Get them from PMC X-Tac. Unlike others like federal and whatnot, their rounds come straight from a South Korean manufacturer that makes their 5.56 rounds to nato standards for their korean military, so no uninspected shit rounds or old ones.

Why

/moms/ pantry pics again
you faggots are worse than the soccer moms on facebook.

Get a dog, lather peanut butter on your shitty anus, have it lick it.

Then eat the dog for good measure and health.

>The country is already largely lawless. Police will be the first to fuck off and bunker down in their own homes.
Cali reporting in; confirmed. They don't even arrest unless the theft is >$950, because it's now only a "violation" and the soros-funded DA refuses to file charges anyway. The POCs literally walk out of stores with armfuls of goods and just drive away. They know the game.

That’s oil and vinegar not wine. You won’t be laughing when you have no raviolis.

Attached: 114EB494-8F2D-47BB-BDF3-60F6A7742B48.png (204x248, 39.43K)

Why the rifles, are they going to shoot the virus?
Also: only the on sitting will survive.

>misses
>gets shot by a nigger with an actual gun

I will remember you buddy.

>being an organlet

lmao

How big a faggot is this guy? "The community" is who I'm dying to shoot at. I just hope it gets worse so the chance of perforating these rednecks goes up.

For me, it's raiders.

Play Russian roulette

If you survive, go steal some TP using that gun

Why do you think?

You say that like you don’t own your own pantry.

>Why no video or photos coming from New Rochelle containment zone?
There’s nothing of interest to video? People can still enter or leave New Rochelle. It’s just large gatherings that are banned

you have to get through me first

Attached: F033D57D-C0EC-4210-8892-A2C5FDC5E788.jpg (640x960, 88.67K)

lmao

Oh you think I'm not prepped for self defense? That's the game fool. Walk soft and carry a big stick.

>perforated untreated appendix means 100% death
>going into a hospital now

Think brainlets, think.

already too late

Is that Issaquah?

prepping is for virigins. if shit REALLY goes down just become a chad raider. coronovirus is still meme tier

Attached: 1579830046995.png (322x322, 72.6K)

I am going to laugh at you when a week from now you realize you bought 5 years worth of toiletries and dehydrated cafeteria food for nothing. Don't complain about being broke after wasting all that money, either.

>chili
>no beans
Well maybe Im idiot but I thought chili made from beans.

Use in lieu of toilet paper

IMPEACH OBAMA

>actually carries a big stick
I can tell you're against firearm ownership. Good luck!

>Choose your group:

>Raiders
>Pros: Never bored, always well-armed, badass armor
>Cons: Leather is sweaty, literally everyone else hates you, a lot of pressure to think of a cool new name otherwise you'll be called "Shart"

>Cannibals
>Pros: Never hungry, good cooks ensure tssty meals, never worry about prisoners
>Cons: Lots of red meat is bad for cholesterol, no veggie side dishes, you're always the backup meal

>Death Cult
>Pros: Sense of community, weekly orgies, fun holidays like Burn the Heretic Day
>Cons: Laws that change daily on the whim of the Great Leader, sermons last too long and might end with mass suicide

>Old Worlders
>Pros: Cool uniforms, pre-apocalypse weapons in good condition, stable society
>Cons: Near brainwashed conformity, might be jailed for wrongthink, secret cabal runs everything

>Survivalists
>Pros: Running water and power, safe from outside horrors, plenty of toilet paper and sardines
>Cons: Extreme paranoia, unfair rationing, cramped quarters underground, fear of exile if you complain

>Traders
>Pros: Travel to new places, always have money, can basically dictate the price of anything you want
>Cons: Constantly protecting inventory, anything you consume cuts into profit, everyone secretly thinks you're Jewish and hates you

>Spacers
>Pros: Get to live on a fucking space station or the moon
>Cons: Food from a tube, might be experimented on, aliens might come back to finish off humans and you'll be first

Cannibal here.

> Police will be the first to fuck off and bunker down in their own homes.
No they won't because they are wagies and would risk losing their phat pension if they get fired. Shit may hit the fan, as it has many times, but if you think the US will collapse because some civilians get uppity, you have no idea how things work.

I hope you shopped during night and kept everything hush-hush. If you didnt you're neighbors are definitely going to loot you if shit happens. Also, sure you have guns but so will your neighbors.

6 mos ago
every 2 days
nobody

all who come here in search of my storage shall parish

badass

>Goes broke from spending a few hundred dollars on supplies.

lmao you're poor.

Sure thing tough guy.

I do.
I even grow and can my own food (waterbath/pressure can)
I just don't post pics like a mommy from facebook.

Did I say that?
NOPE!

why is it that you guys are incapable of staying on topic?