Brit/po/bidet edtion

>Millions of workers stay at home as commuters find car parks empty and train carriages deserted as coronavirus crisis grips Britain
dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8108299/Millions-workers-stay-home-amid-coronavirus-crisis.html

>David Cameron ‘targeted’ by crazed arsonist who burned down his neighbour’s house with a Molotov cocktail
thesun.co.uk/news/11153940/david-cameron-targeted-arsonist-burned-neighbours-house/

>Raging Binfire near Langholm housing estate
newsandstar.co.uk/news/18286784.youths-sought-raging-bin-fire-near-housing-estate/

>Migrants face £624 annual fee to use NHS in ‘shameful and counterproductive’ Budget move
metro.co.uk/2020/03/11/migrants-face-620-annual-fee-use-nhs-shameful-budget-move-12384086/

>Youths believed to have started Binfire involving large wheelie bin in York
yorkpress.co.uk/news/18293682.youths-believed-started-fire-involving-large-wheelie-bin-york/

>Solo 45 trial: Grime artist convicted of 21 rapes
avonandsomerset.police.uk/news/2020/03/solo-45-trial-grime-artist-convicted-of-21-rapes/

>Wheelie bin torched in Edlington resulting in Binfire
rotherhamadvertiser.co.uk/news/view,wheelie-bin-torched-in-edlington_35380.htm

>SNP scolded for interrupting OWN MP with rowdy behaviour as Commons descends into chaos
express.co.uk/news/politics/1253951/snp-news-ian-blackford-boris-johnson-parliament-live-budget-2020-latest

>Sweet As Pie: Highlights From British Pie Week 2020
bakeryinfo.co.uk/news/fullstory.php/aid/22685/British_Pie_Week_2020_highlights_from_Higgidy,_Pukka_and_Pieminister.html

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Other urls found in this thread:

twitter.com/AyoCaesar/status/1238041418612051968
confidentials.com/manchester/castlefield-boat-wars
youtube.com/watch?v=83k3Q9MWvwk
express.co.uk/celebrity-news/1254957/pete-mitchell-dead-death-dj-bbc-radio-2-virgin-radio-news-latest-update
dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8108271/Chief-scientific-adviser-wants-60-percent-entire-population-catch-coronavirus.html
theguardian.com/education/2020/mar/13/coronavirus-school-closures-uk-gdp-ministers-warned
corona.help/country/italy
youtube.com/watch?v=gqo0HebSjGU
youtube.com/watch?v=WPSNQQt7u_8
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

reminder that this traitor has the blood of millions on his hands. he should be executed on live tv for wilfully choosing inaction during this crisis.
>just build up herd immunity, bro
>who cares if millions die?

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>tripfag
>brit/po/
>bidet nigger
I knew you were a retard.

>Many Bothans have died to give you this information

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So many fucking panicmongs like in these threads. Infection is inevitable. Do you intend to self isolate for the rest of your life?
Have you rigged up chemical showers at the entry points?
Are you going to disinfect every fucking thing you bring into your house from this point forward.

This strategy is the most realistic one. We either build immunity or tolerances to yearly variants or we die.
Theres no realistic way to quarantine the entire fucking country in perpetuum.
The old and infirm and obese will be at big risk and many wil die but that's life and that's what pandemics do.

The best we can hope for is that they stagger the infections as much as possible and spread out the peak of the infection to limit the strain on Healthcare resources and the economy so that we don't plunge into a full on depression and millions aren't pushing to get into crammed hospitals at the same time.

I mean what the fuck do you want them to do? Quarantine the entire population for several months? Are you retarded? Grow up. Besides half of you are fucking children and they will inevitably close schools so you'll at least get to play fortnite for a few weeks so I don't know why you're all crying so much.

How do you dry your bum after? Toilet paper will fall apart, so do you use a towel?

he’s a nonce as well

>not enough tests
>not enough masks
>not enough masks
Basically some of you guys are going to die.

Thanks Government!

Jew, can't be blamed for being one, hence he isn't the traitor, just a jew

herd immunity is impossible. reinfection is common and deadly. the virus has ADE and it is mutating rapidly. boris and his party are all murderers.

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i dont have a bidet, but when i used them on holiday, there were awesome

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Isn't Immunity a lie though?
Once you have antibodies isn't it more deadly if you get reinfected?

No doubt.
>likes having his sphincter tickled

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go on the nonce site and show me it , if you know it so well you fucking nonce.

do europeans really do this

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I wish you just KYS, instead of mouthing horse shit

I mean
>not enough beds
>not enough ventilators.

>reinfection is common and deadly
No it isn't, you are chatting utter bollocks mate
All this reinfection doomsaying speculation has no legitimate evidence. Basing policy on hysteria and pure speculation is not wise.

Do you know how the reinfection nonsense has started?
Some sick person gets tested and is found to be infected. Their symptoms abate and they are retested and found clear. Symptoms then 'reappear' and they retested again and found positive for corona.

Every goes 'oh shit almost immediate reinfection oh no ahhhh'.
In reality the patient was never actually free of corona. They were given a shitty test that is so rubbish its almost a joke. They swab for corona rna. If the virus is propagating in the lungs and they swab the mouth, they can get a negative.

Until we have antibody tests these infected figures are worthless and speculation about reinfection is unwarranted hysteria that no serious person will use to create policy

yes. this virus is a combination of SARS + AIDS. it stays in your system after you "recover" and it has ADE, which will cause a cytokine storm as soon as it re-emerges or you encounter another strain of the virus.

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just google your old tripcode mate, it’s all there

twitter.com/AyoCaesar/status/1238041418612051968

Tash Sarkar getting BTFOd in the comments

fuck off to cvg

Yes
Designated butt drying towel

>IT'S JUST THE FLU BRO NOTHING WILL HAPPEN
>if you get sick and die you can't do anything about it that's just life
This is how far you have come. Nobody should listen to you fags ever again.

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you have nothing

Inaccurate cheap chinese shit, if you have brass for US made on go for it.
>I want something to protect me and my family against intruders if SHTF.
Get two recurve bows, spend as much as you like but something like the firecats should be adequate- you'll want the wife working one if the hoardes do show up. spare strings and end caps for each,rail lube and as many bolts as you think you'll need to fire and more importantly practise with it.

>Isn't Immunity a lie though?
No it isn't, and that's not how antibodies work despite what shrill hand-wringing conspiritards like will have you believe
It's true we don't know the long term effects but you pussies immediately jump to worst case scenario and then shit post in every thread like it's established fact.
And really it doesn't matter if this shit is worse than the bubonic plague, the fact remains that you cannot practically quarantine a country for extended periods of time and expect anything to be left afterwards.
The current approach is the only practicable one going. The rest is up to sheer luck. If its a bad virus that does serious damage we're fucked but there's nothing to be done about it.

>Feel like having stereotypical friday takeaway
>Only places near me are chinese

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck

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>SOME weeks ago we got word from residents of a water-bound confrontation playing out amongst the tranquility of the Castlefield basin.

>A sinister looking black canal boat had rammed a lesser white and blue craft inhabited illegally by a set of ‘undesirables’ (thought to be homeless) and sank it. Leaving it listlessly submerged in the middle of the Bridgewater Canal. It has since been removed.

confidentials.com/manchester/castlefield-boat-wars

Lol Manchester

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The bidet COPE is pathetic

TOiLET ROLL ELITIST MASTER RACE
youtube.com/watch?v=83k3Q9MWvwk

By all means hide in your attic for the next 18 months. The rest of us have lives to lead and families to provide for.

italy is going to hit 20k confirmed infected either tomorrow or the day after. so much for the accuracy of the chinese numbers. this thing has a higher r0 than measles.

Yeah, no one knows. All measures against the virus are gambles.

god she’s fit

so pirates rammed him

>RRRRRREEEEEE IM NOT A NONCE AND HAVE NOTHING TO HIDE BUT IM GONNA DELETE MY TRIP ANYWAY
Nonce

>only chinese
haha fucking soufs.

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Proper ones have a hot air blower too

testing is worthless at this point without the ability to check for antibodies.

Fuck you can test a person with symptoms and not even get a positive result. You can test someone a day after their symptoms cleared and get a negative result while they're still highly infections. Current testing numbers means almost nothing. They're an absolute bare minimum figure. South Korea can say what the fuck they want but the reality is they have absolutely no idea on true infection numbers, just like everyone else.

Take a corn on the cob

Cover it in peanut butter

Try cleaning off all the peanut butter with toilet paper

Now try cleaning off all the peanut butter with a hose

See which method is more effective

t. bidet master race

why would i come back use the same name, your out manned and out gunned

But sars and mers lead to long term problems. And antibodies trigger a deadly secondary response.

>The current approach is the only practicable one going.
>Do nothing
That approach is ridiculous. You are A SHILL FOR THE GOVERNMENT OR MENTALLY HANDICAPPED IF YOU JUst want to sit back and let it happen.
>If its a bad virus that does serious damage we're fucked but there's nothing to be done about it.
>it's fine if it's deadly and infects everyone because nothing can be done about
This mindset is worse.
>dude just let people die, don't bother prepping, ignore everything China and Italy are doing and just go on like nothing is happening.

Italy are right now choosing who to save and who to let die because of lack of beds and ventilators. The same will happen here and you and politicians are murderers and good for nothing retards who aren't even thinking of preparing for anything.

>hot air blower
spreading even more faecal matter
based japs

you can buy bidet adapters for just about any toilet online, got mine for 30 bucks off amazon 2 years ago and have been living a clean shitter dream ever since

you’ve been outed as a nonce mate

Aaaaaah
express.co.uk/celebrity-news/1254957/pete-mitchell-dead-death-dj-bbc-radio-2-virgin-radio-news-latest-update

If your ass looks like corn on the cob you have bigger problems than COPING you cant AFFORD toilet paper

>I mean what the fuck do you want them to do? Quarantine the entire population for several months?
Everyone else is doing it. Other countries seem to actually understand the severity of the virus, and long asymptomatic, infectious period.

How much does it cost for a homeless license there?

I dont want law enforcement raiding my abandoned bridge abutment and finding my illegal Old Timer paring knife

>>>/cvg/

Not enuff tits on britpol

>Do europeans really have hygiene and not shart themselves in the mart

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Wheres this? Cyprus?

This is true. Libertarian Paternalism is the best strategy for the west to weather this storm, we're not China. Watch France revolt and Germany's economy collapse when their governments lock down the population for more than a few months. Italy had mass prison riots and general unruly behaviour almost straight away.

Why am I your mate if I am a nonce??

It was an angry lad who paid for his moorings there and got pissed off with the water pikeys staying there rent free and causing a nuisance so he decided to sink them.

I will have to check them out thanks

Turkey effes

>>Do nothing

The governments proposal isn't to stop the virus but to let it spread IN A SLOW AND CONTROLLED MANNER MANNER so as to create a firewall and protect the vulnerable to not have them die and to stop them clogging up the hospitals. They can't be indefinitely kept safe however so you need the virus to sweep through the healthy having a minimal impact and the NHS be able to cope in order to prevent people who can recover from dying.
By significantly reducing the R0 in a managed manner, you just deal with it as it comes in the most comfortable fashion.

This is a proactive approach and if the UK pulls this off it'll be one hell of a showcase of UKs capabilities in data once again.

Shutting all the schools, businesses etc... might seem "Proactive" but it isn't. It's reactive panicking at its best and encourages a fucked up peak-and-trough style management which will fuck up nations economies and health services while depriving many from care which in an appropriately, consistent managed outbreak (though on paper perhaps scariest), a far greater number are actually able to be treated effectively.

pikeys are based

>Chief scientific adviser wants 40million Britons - 60 percent of the entire population - to catch coronavirus for herd immunity to take effect
dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8108271/Chief-scientific-adviser-wants-60-percent-entire-population-catch-coronavirus.html
>muh herd immunity

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spend a lot of time in turkey do you? lots of nonce rings there is it?

>tfw elites turn off the water to by butt blaster orgie 5000


:{

That was just a more extreme example to illustrate what a difference it makes - it is still more effective on skin as well - the hairier the skin the more glaring the difference

>By significantly reducing the R0 in a managed manner
kind of hard to reduce the r0 when it can hang around in the air for hours and survive on surfaces for weeks at a time.

Okay Mohammed

what should he do, hold your hand on how to protect yourself? fucking stay home, minimize travel if necessary, wash your self, and go to a clinic or stay home if you feel sick

Arent bidets just for fags and filthy foreigners? Basically people with ravaged sphincters that look like bust bike tyres?

so you admit you’re a nonce

I dont remember a run on toilet paper during the last 8 end-of-times apocalypses, if im shitting all over i just clean myself in the shower

reminder that this is literally nothing and even if it kills me i don't really care. win win situation. simple as

Damn this pirates, with smelly ass.

If everyone dies, there is no economy.
Why are you all shills for capitalism and care about money and the monetary impact.
I hope when you are older and some deadly virus crops up, they come for you and let you die and the you might realise it.

There is no such thing as herd immunity for this. The side effects are deadly and dangerous.

If you think the Uks approach is any good you're retarded.
Too much misinformation and retardedness going on.
>dude it's fine to let people get it and face the risk because it's controlled.
It's not being controlled, it won't be controlled and it's one big lie.

Just fuck off with this shitty lies from the government about controlling it whilst doing absolutely nothing to stop it or slow it down.

>t.seamus o'bastard

>School closures could wipe 3% from UK GDP, ministers warned
theguardian.com/education/2020/mar/13/coronavirus-school-closures-uk-gdp-ministers-warned
>muh economy
>may as well get 40 million+ people infected instead

Argentina is rightful Paraguayan clay

>tribe orientated
>self sufficient in a way (compared to most people) and are a burden on our globalist loving system
>prey on tax paying middle class neoliberals plus suburban white yoofs who think they're skepta
>don't vote in elections

You need a permit to busk in a lot of places.

I feel like I would shit all over that bidet attachment. Are they supposed to be covered in shit?

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Is the deathrate 2%?

After thinking about it a bit I've come to the conclusion that our government has made the right decision and everyone saying otherwise on Yas Forums is low IQ

It's mathematically the best solution to this problem. American and European hospitals will be completely overrun within a month.

>This is how far you have come. Nobody should listen to you fags ever again.

that's been my attitude to life since like forever, most people don't matter and are not worth preserving, i also never said it was just a flu

3% GPD is what Lammy spends on Jaffa cakes annually.

44% or so CFR in italy so far.

My cousin just posted some deranged rant on Facebook, slagging off 'moron spastics' who have been 'panic buying' toilet roll. I'm guessing she wrote this while sitting on the toilet with no toilet roll. I'm considering replying with a picture of myself sitting on a giant throne made from toilet roll.

Not being prepared for the happening 2months ago.. women

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>'moron spastics'

they kind off are though.

No, it's 7%.
>corona.help/country/italy

Goodbye you fags it's hard to die
When all the birds are singing in the sky
Now that spring is in the air
Theres no shitroll anywhere
Think of me and I'll be there

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No it's not. It's 6.7%, which is still fucking huge.

you only use "recovered"/dead to calculate a CFR. it's pretty safe to assume that the rest of the infected will follow roughly the same pattern.

We've been going on about happenings for years now, can't believe it's finally happening though

Is this the first brit/po/ thread?
Can we get some British papercraft and origami in here

youtube.com/watch?v=gqo0HebSjGU
youtube.com/watch?v=WPSNQQt7u_8

FACKIN' GO ON MOI SAHN

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>be britbro
>Buy cargo van
>Stock with endtimes supplies for family, thereby lessoning need for public services
>Local law enforcement engages traffic stop
>Fines me 300 pounds
>Gotta keep the unlawful tv viewing squad funded

Just jump in the shower

You can wash your bum in the shower if needed. You don't need 30 bog rolls for 2 weeks desu.

what's the context of this mutt here?