/cvg/ - Corona Virus General #2003 - PANDEMIC EDITIONS

► Detected: 139,630 ► Died: 5,120

>NEWS
WHO declares _PANDEMIC_
archive.is/ZleCj

Catalonia puts several municipalities under lockdown
archive.is/G0FYV

Duterte places Manila under lockdown, 13 million affected
archive.is/S7aIm

Fed injects $1.5 trillion, fails to stop historic crash
archive.is/Wfvii

Trump bans travel and cargo transfer between US and Europe
archive.is/TPBvZ

>RESEARCH
Survives 28 days in bacteria on surfaces at 4°C
archive.is/HsmZ9

Patients can get reinfected, no immunity
archive.is/W9vNf

Testicular damage
archive.is/I6wRu

Virus invades nervous systems
archive.is/qmc6U

Survives up to 9 days on different materials
archive.is/HsmZ9

>REMINDER
China industrial capacity estimated to be at 50-60%
archive.is/MrQFb

China burning bodies without testing or registration
archive.is/Thlaq

US prepares for 96 million cases and 480,000 deaths
archive.is/Hgdg5

China changes definitions 3 times in 8 days
archive.is/2xlZf

China regularly changes reporting to hide numbers
archive.is/ri1TY

>LATEST CASES
23:21: 87 new cases and 1 new death in Spain.
23:00: 2 new cases in Ecuador.
23:00: 233 new cases and 1 new death in Germany.
22:59: 7 new cases in Luxembourg.
22:39: 1 new death in Switzerland.
22:38: 171 new cases in Norway.
22:48: 1 new case in Paraguay.

>MORE (LINKS, NEWS, RESEARCH, VIDEOS, GUIDES)
pastebin.com/raw/qy5RFpVX

Attached: CVG.png (686x526, 215.72K)

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=eGNVsQwWZLI
youtube.com/watch?v=eyntF-VqRBw
youtube.com/watch?v=_djqmmc8ZsI
ctvnews.ca/health/coronavirus/canadian-scientists-make-covid-19-research-breakthrough-isolating-virus-1.4851641
floridahealth.gov/diseases-and-conditions/COVID-19/
yahoo.com/news/people-fully-recover-coronavirus-left-103917303.html
imgur.com/a/kBcKSeh
twitter.com/jairbolsonaro/status/1238490282385080322
youtube.com/watch?v=JdL3DOkORnw
n.miaopai.com/media/e4F33spyWpEJSGEPICFTrIdBFfwX5CH5
pastebin.com/u/krautism2020
twitter.com/NSFWRedditImage

>LATEST CHANGES
China +22 (+8) Iran +1,289 (+85) S. Korea +110 (+5) Spain +1,188 (+36) Germany +372 (+1) Netherlands +190 (+5) H. Kong +1 (+1) Indonesia +35 (+3) Ukraine (+1) Sudan +1 (+1) US +135 Switzerland +267 Norway +98 Sweden +123 UK +208 Denmark +114 Japan +10 Belgium +157 Austria +143 Bahrain +13 Singapore +13 Australia +43 Malaysia +39 Canada +16 Finland +46 Brazil +74 Slovenia +45 Israel +17 Czech Rep. +4 Portugal +34 Kuwait +20 India +7 S. Marino +8 Romania +20 Lebanon +9 Thailand +5 Philippines +12 Poland +13 S. Arabia +17 Taiwan +1 Russia +11 Estonia +14 Brunei +12 Palestine +4 Albania +10 Croatia +4 Serbia +7 Slovakia +9 Peru +6 Panama +13 S. Africa +8 Pakistan +1 Ecuador +2 Oman +1 Hungary +3 Latvia +1 Macedonia +5 Cyprus +4 Bosnia +2 Colombia +4 Malta +3 Maldives +1 Armenia +2 Jamaica +6 Morocco +1 Cambodia +2 Lithuania +3 S. Lanka +2 Réunion +1 Faeroes +1 Fr. Polynesia +2 Congo +1 Kazakhstan +2 Turkey +1 Caymans +1 Ethiopia +1 Gabon +1 Guadeloupe +1 Guinea +1 Kenya +1 Total +5,074 (+146)

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Reminder that "Coronavirus" is a social experiment on crowd control.
This Chinese disease is a joke, it has killed far less than H1N1, SARS and even the seasonal flu. It's but a souped up common cold.
This is an experiment to verify how far they can make us go in a media-induced panic situation. How much they can limit our freedoms while still making us thank them for it.
It is also an attack on our economies. Paralyzed countries like Italy will create a gigantic recession. That's not to mention the cancellation of sporting events, the closing of colleges and cultural centers, businesses, etc. And of course, precisely as this unfolds, Saudi Arabia "coincidentally" decides to fool around with oil prices!
Normally, a similar situation would foster other sectors like tourism and air travel - except this time they thought of that too - artificial panic convinced people we need major travel bans! This was carefully planned.
Shall we remind ourselves of how much money George Soros made for himself when he shorted the pound sterling in 1992? Of course, this time around, oligarchs will hit the jackpot with the predictable currency and stock devaluations.
Rest assured that the American people will pull through with unrivaled tenacity!
A silly cold does not scare us, and we have the best healthcare in the world. No matter how hard the lugenpresse tries to scare us, we will not give in!
America does not stop! Do not allow your local businesses and towns to stop! Remember that it is unconstitutional to limit the free movement of Americans throughout our territory.
Say no to quarantines and lockdowns! Call your representatives and community leaders. Tell them we will not sacrifice our economy to the profane Chinese bat god. Do not be forced to stay in!
The show must go on! America is not for the weak! Let Europe and the rest of the world be embarrassed at how silly they'll look as this barely even scratches us!
Fear not, my patriots, for God is with us! God bless America!

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DENMARK NUMBA WAN

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>COUNTRIES LIST
► China 80,815 (3,177) ► International 58,815 (1,943): Italy 15,113 (1,016) Iran 11,364 (514) S. Korea 7,979 (71) Spain 4,334 (122) Germany 3,117 (7) France 2,876 (61) US 1,832 (41) Switzerland 1,135 (7) Norway 898 (1) Sweden 810 (1) Netherlands 804 (10) UK 798 (10) Japan 701 (19) D. Princess 696 (7) Belgium 556 (3) Austria 504 (1) Australia 199 (3) Canada 158 (1) H. Kong 132 (4) Greece 117 (1) Iraq 83 (8) India 81 (1) S. Marino 80 (5) Egypt 80 (2) Lebanon 77 (3) Thailand 75 (1) Ireland 70 (1) Indonesia 69 (4) Philippines 64 (5) Poland 64 (1) Taiwan 50 (1) Albania 33 (1) Argentina 31 (1) Panama 27 (1) Algeria 26 (2) Bulgaria 23 (1) Azerbaijan 15 (1) Morocco 7 (1) Ukraine 3 (1) Guyana 1 (1) Sudan 1 (1) Denmark 788 Qatar 262 Bahrain 210 Singapore 200 Malaysia 197 Finland 155 Brazil 151 Slovenia 141 Israel 126 Czech Rep. 120 Iceland 117 Portugal 112 Kuwait 100 UAE 85 Romania 79 S. Arabia 62 Russia 45 Vietnam 44 Estonia 41 Brunei 37 Palestine 35 Chile 33 Croatia 31 Serbia 31 Slovakia 30 Peru 28 Luxembourg 26 Georgia 25 S. Africa 24 C. Rica 23 Pakistan 22 Belarus 21 Ecuador 19 Oman 19 Hungary 19 Latvia 17 Macedonia 14 Cyprus 14 Tunisia 13 Bosnia 13 Colombia 13 Mexico 12 Malta 12 Macao 10 Senegal 10 Maldives 9 Armenia 8 Jamaica 8 Afghanistan 7 Cambodia 7 Lithuania 6 Fr. Guiana 6 Moldova 6 Paraguay 6 Dom. Rep. 5 N. Zealand 5 S. Lanka 5 Réunion 5 Liechtenstein 4 Bangladesh 3 Bolivia 3 Chan. Isl. 3 Cuba 3 Faeroes 3 Fr. Polynesia 3 Martinique 3 Monaco 2 Nigeria 2 B. Faso 2 Cameroon 2 Congo 2 Ghana 2 Honduras 2 Kazakhstan 2 Saint Martin 2 Turkey 2 Andorra 1 Jordan 1 Nepal 1 Bhutan 1 Caymans 1 Ivory C. 1 Ethiopia 1 Gabon 1 Gibraltar 1 Guadeloupe 1 Guinea 1 Vatican 1 Kenya 1 Mongolia 1 St. Barth 1 St. Vincent 1 Togo 1 Trin. & Tob. 1

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I just want to hang out with corona in underground bunker

youtube.com/watch?v=eGNVsQwWZLI

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Just to put things into perspective for you. Around 40000 die of the flu each year in the USA.
Worldwide, probably over a million, but let's low-ball and say 720k.
Which means 60000 each month die of the flu. This is 2000 each day.
Right now we have 5100 deaths in total after like 3 months of this.
>inb4 muh exponential groth
Not happening fast enough, friendo. This thing so far is absolutely dwarfed by the flu, and will probably remain that way.
We need 2000 deaths each day from it before it's even on par with the flu.

Also, most of the people dying from this are so old that a slight gust of wind could fuck them up. Just happens to be the virus that does it for them.

>5 CONFIRMED CASES IN TURKEY
5 CONFIRMED CASES IN TURKEY
>5 CONFIRMED CASES IN TURKEY
5 CONFIRMED CASES IN TURKEY
>5 CONFIRMED CASES IN TURKEY
5 CONFIRMED CASES IN TURKEY
>5 CONFIRMED CASES IN TURKEY
5 CONFIRMED CASES IN TURKEY

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KARA BOGA

Ohio is in a panic.

Stores are sold out of toilet paper everywhere. Hand sanitizer and sanitizing wipes are hard to find.
The governor has banned all gatherings of more than 100 people, with the exceptions of airports and train stations.
Universities have kicked students off campus. At the university of Dayton when they told the students to leave they decided to get drunk and party. When the cops tried to break it up, the students threw rocks, so the cops used pepper balls to disperse the crowd.
Effective monday, schools are closed for 3 weeks. This is probably the biggest disruption. People are freaking out about child care, and many will probably miss work due to this.

The biggest craft brewery in Cincinnati, Rheingeist, has closed their taproom for the foreseeable future.
The Reds' opening day parade, which is practically a holy holiday in Cininnati, was cancelled prior to MLB delaying the season. Mayor Cranley has declared a state of emergency.

I am just outside Cincinnati praying my online order of toilet paper doesn't get cancelled or stolen.
We finally made it to the future. This is it.

Dutch Prime Minister just in live interview:
>up until 20-year-olds are at a VERY VERY LOW risk of EVEN SPREADING it
>which is why we're not closing schools

JUST

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DOW JONES CRASHING IN A BIG PUMP DAY

RUN TO THE HILLS NOW,DRUMPF IS KILLING THE USA

So, how are you all feeling about being part of this once-in-a-century event?

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ARE THE REFUGEES SAFE?? HAS ANYONE HEARD FROM THEM? IS ANYONE BEING SENT TO PROTECT THEM?

C R A S H I N G

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Been absent for a few days, are we still trying to dial-in into the WHO pressers?

youtube.com/watch?v=eyntF-VqRBw

I LOVE YOU, CORONA-CHAN

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NUKE THEM AND NUKE CHINA NOW

Go on get there disease and test if it's so weak

holy shit

*coof*

>Guberment literally crashing country with no survivors

Sorry Dutch bro’s

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BORIS AND MERKEL TO MEET ERDOGAN NEXT TUESDAY

Once in a lifetime, fren.

START ALREADY
youtube.com/watch?v=_djqmmc8ZsI

Mildly amused.

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ctvnews.ca/health/coronavirus/canadian-scientists-make-covid-19-research-breakthrough-isolating-virus-1.4851641

DUVAL COUNTY FLORIDA CONFIRMED CASE
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
HOLD ME /904/ BROS
floridahealth.gov/diseases-and-conditions/COVID-19/

global financial plummet next week

Yes its important to have comedy during such times

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>"Coronavirus" is a social experiment
It's just a prank bro

DEATH TO ISREAL!

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Good evening i hate jews

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short guide on preserving foods in jars:
>buy botteling jars, the ones with a metal snap mechanism and big rubber band
>cook sauce or stew or whatever, for example a nice bolognese with lots of carrot celeries and meat
>clean botteling jars and rinse with boiling water for desinfaction, also put the rubber bands in boiling water
>reheat sauce until boiling with bubbles
>fill boiling sauce into botteling jars, immetiadly seal them
>put botteling jars into a big pot, fill pot with water to a level above the top of the botteling jars. depending on the size of your pot you can do 2 to 3 at a time
>boil the water, watch the botteling jars. the jars and their content will now be heated until boiling. in this process the pressure ins
ide the jars will rise until small bubbles are pushed out through the rubberbands. you're done when the jars stop bubbling, which typical
y takes more then an hour. the content is now practicaly sterile and has negative pressure.
>let jars cool down, store in a dark and cool environment

you can do this with all foods that can be heated to this degree. i.e. gulash, soup, stews..
an easy way to test if it worked and also to test if your food is still good: just open the emchanic snap lock.
if it stays closed due to negative pressure it's still good,
if it comes open or even pops open the food started degrading.

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Why watch it? Pandemic already declared any other info is pointless

maybe it's true

How big will Cornoa-chans tits get at 150k 200k 500k and 1 million confirmed cases?

Trump to declare National Emergency today?

After so many fake happenings thank fucking God something is finally happening!

50 bucks says, all 3 are infected already.

>I've been absent for a few days
I bet you have, Roswell

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Cute OC.

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>People who fully recover from the coronavirus can be left with '20 to 30%' less lung function, and gasping for breath when they walk quickly, Hong Kong doctors find
yahoo.com/news/people-fully-recover-coronavirus-left-103917303.html

Scar tissue in your lungs confirmed. Literally just SARS.

Hey Austria anons
Did you get your electric+gas bills this month???are they freezing payments??

>All this fuss over an illness with a 3% mortality rate

Gee, guys soon there'll only be 97% of us left

Kind of bored because the happening has hardly happened in my state. I'm afraid it will all blow over be it can even start.

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WE'RE NOT GONNA TO MAKE IT
WE
WE'RE NOT GONNA MAKE IT

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I'm glad I'm old enough to understand how things are affected by it but not old enough to be in complete denial.

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lol, the diamond princess plague ship showed that people under 20 are just as likely to get infected, just less likely to get bad symptoms. They're still very much contagious.

>loop.webm
Wow I love this

The number for USA doesn't map arcgis.

Arcgis mysteriously went from 1701 confirmed in USA earlier this morning, to 1268 total now. Nearly 500 cases went away and never existed, I guess.

don't forget to support /yourguy/, trumpfags lmfao

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The Chad Rational Leader vs the Virgin Panicker.

It's and old video from a week ago but still top kek

imgur.com/a/kBcKSeh

imgur.com/a/kBcKSeh

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I don't think 1 million confirmed cases will ever happen. Even the Danish government don't test unless you have critical symptoms.

>mfw bears are gonna miss the upcoming recovery

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>gasping for breath when they walk
shit,I think most americans already have it

Comfy AF. I wanted things to speed up but the Australian government is giving everyone free money next month in an attempt to stop a recession. So... kinda hoping we aren't Italy levels for a few months. It's possible if we shut borders completely. The sky borders, I mean, because we're an island.

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BOLSONARO IS NOT INFECTED!

twitter.com/jairbolsonaro/status/1238490282385080322

2 weeks more holidays for me
THANK YOU CORONA!!!


ahahaha
oh fuck I just coughed

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>tfw missed thread #2000
Ah well, I'll be there for #3000.
I hope.

THE CAMERA MOVED

Maybe only people born in october can spread it. Who knows

> Pump $1.5 trillion
> It's over! Buy the dip
> Goes down anyway because you can't fix an epidemic printing money

Bobo laughs at this

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based i think macron is going aswell

Based

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youtube.com/watch?v=eyntF-VqRBw
Almost WHOnigger time.

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>donate pls
Looks like somebody lost all his money in the stock market this week.

lucky because fuck college lmao
fuck presentations fuck exams fuck drooling retard classmates

Bolsonaro is safe

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I can't believe how normies are still saying "It's just a flu, bro" here. They will kill us all, unironically.

um. if /cvg/ is still around @3k we're in big trouble

Is there a list for all the symptoms yet?

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Holy shit its Al Bundy. He finally got out of the shoe business.

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I missed it too, but don't beat yourself over it, I went away for like five minutes and it was already #2001

Yeah we are checking every body at the morge, and they are all testing positive for death.

So I guess we have a 100% death rate at our morge.

>my immune system if I ever get infected

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Are you psychos really still going on about this nothingburger? Come on, it will all be over in another week or two. I can’t wait for your governments to round you up for spreading vile lies and sowing discord online

he's a lying monkey

dont worry the market happening will hit us all regardless

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STARTING IN 5 MINUTES
>STARTING IN 5 MINUTES

youtube.com/watch?v=_djqmmc8ZsI

STARTING IN 5 MINUTES
>STARTING IN 5 MINUTES

youtube.com/watch?v=_djqmmc8ZsI

STARTING IN 5 MINUTES
>STARTING IN 5 MINUTES

youtube.com/watch?v=_djqmmc8ZsI

STARTING IN 5 MINUTES
>STARTING IN 5 MINUTES

youtube.com/watch?v=_djqmmc8ZsI

STARTING IN 5 MINUTES
>STARTING IN 5 MINUTES

youtube.com/watch?v=_djqmmc8ZsI

If it's in Jacksonville, RIP US NAVY Mayport
youtube.com/watch?v=JdL3DOkORnw

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All city niggers are like that. Rual country men are the real Americans.

0 new arrivals since march 1

cum is the cure

how did he even craft such a complex device

You know who you remind me of?
Dad in pic related
Total selfish scum

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anons who live with parents, what's your plan?

>you can't fix an epidemic printing money
hmm are you sure about that kiddo
well anyway i dont care about any of that, i just like the sounds
>brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

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>being prepared to the point of owning a new gas mask and suit
>has not enough food at home
kek

based

oh it will

Nice to know someone else has a government as useless as ours

3 here comrade

I’m kinda pissed that like half of Yas Forums is random corona-chan related threads now after they were talking shit about us here in /cvg/ for weeks.

gf just texted saying they are closing school she teaches at until april
the facility was supposed to be a polling place for election on tuesday

death

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>let's destroys economy of some countries so we can do a social experiment
The already know what we think and what we do, or what we will do.

Don't worry. 3000 soon

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Rock hard and ready to disasterbate

It's everywhere. There is no stop,ing her.

Wuhan celeberating for the end of quarantine
n.miaopai.com/media/e4F33spyWpEJSGEPICFTrIdBFfwX5CH5

Can confirm, ur mom is immune

>Shortness of breath
>Pain in chest
Yeah, I have it bros. I'm dead

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Good thing dipshit eurofags are banned from America

>UPDATE ON GERMANY 12.03.

>566 NEW INFECTIONS:
>3311 TOTAL INFECTIONS +20,62%
>1 NEW DEATH:
>7 TOTAL DEATHS +16,67%
last update: 13.03. 15:00 GMT
source: Berliner Morgenpost

>RKI reports:
+798 = 2365 cases
updated: 12.03. 14:00 GMT

>7 DEAD (13.03.)
woman, 89, NRW, 03.03.: accute diarhea, low bloodpressure, pneumonia, tested, ICU, 09.03.: lung failure
man, 78, NRW, diabetis, heart condition, 09.03.: heart failure
man, 73, NRW, severe comorbidity, pneumonia, 11.03.: lung failure
man, 67, BaWü, tested post mortem, 12.03.
man, 80, Bayern, comorbidity, 12.03.
woman, 78, NRW, 12.03.
man, 80, BaWü, 13.03.

>german virologist: total cases represent data from 10 days ago

>DOG IN QUARANTINE NOT INFECTED
Welt reports: "dog of a patient in hongkong does not carry the virus"

>13.03.
RKI appeals to all citizens to reduce social contacts.
Minister of transport appeals to all citizens to reduce travel.
Ministry of health reports: 23 patients in ICU, hospitals must preapare for more and set up teams of specialists for intensive care.

Minister of economy does not preclude temporary state envolvement in strategical important companies.
Minister of work Hubertus Heil tested negative
Minister of economy and minister of finance: "We are going to help companies with tax cuts."
Second member of german parliament infected (both FDP). "I got infected, allthough I followed hygene-recommendations."
Bundeswehr buiys medical supplies; 300000 masks disinfectant and more protective gear, to supply doctors offices.
Heinsberg asks Bundeswehr for help, testing capacity reached.
Federal Police: Border security increased, stricter controls.
Berlin: Foodbanks for the poor closing, health of workers has priority.
Lieferando to drop delivered food at doorstep.

UN-headquarter NY: phillipine diplomat infected, attended council of UN on monday
China sends masks, ventilators and experts to Itlay

source: Welt, Zeit, ntv, others

previous posts:
pastebin.com/u/krautism2020

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I don't trust him on this and neither should you.

#rekt

Sorry Dutch bros.

stonks will go to bonks

Dayton user here, can confirm, but UD has had more parties to celabrate parties and shit since,I can remember.

thats been happening all this week.

maybe the students doing the work are coughing so hard they keep making typos?

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It'll be a ghost town by then

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I love mion

TURKEY BANS FLIGHTS TO 9 MORE COUNTRIES AMID CORONAVIRUS OUTBREAK: GERMANY, FRANCE, NORWAY, SPAIN, AUSTRIA, DENMARK, BELGIUM, SWEDEN, NETHERLANDS.

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Lmao I'm seeing the same thing at my stores, laughing at the morons who didn't prep yet

It's unironically everywhere. Expect to get the symptoms in the next month

>n.miaopai.com/media/e4F33spyWpEJSGEPICFTrIdBFfwX5CH5

Ah yes, let the reinfections begin

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have this

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>inb4 refugees start going back to Syria because it's safer there

Why? We are the winners

You'll know you have the serious strain if you have a bad dry cough and a splitting headache all over, especially your brain stem

If you live with your folks you should be honest and say you want to bug out, get back into nature. Set a tent up outside with rations.

Make it seem like your trying to improve yourself

I don’t know what to do guys...

I don’t have any more food or toilet paper... all of the stores near me are empty...

My neighbor has plenty, he said he will give us some if my girlfriend stays over with him...

Should I give her permission?

Look here you fucking shill, this is not a flu. Treating it as such will get people killed.
I'm not saying we start rewriting laws, but quarantines will be the most effective way to contain it.
Italy is at 7% mortality

he can have enough but you always need more
At this point im buying a lot of tobacco to sell it expensive once they lockown everything

BOLSONARO HAS THE VIRUS IT’S OVER HE WAS WITH TRUMP

OH NO NO NO NO NO NO

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It is. 0 cases so far

Guys this is a nothing burger. Stop you're concerning your families and stressing them out. Relax.

Holy based, shadman.

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Just a week ago we were getting like 2-3 thousand cases a day
Today we're over 6 thousand already and Italy and France haven't even published their numbers for the day
Took like 2 weeks to go from 2 to 3 thousand dead, then a bit more than a week from 3 to 4, now we broke over 5 thousand in just a couple of days
Being a nothingburger at this point is just criminal negligence, and yet common russians still don't give a shit. Today i went out to find just 3 people with masks in the metro. Fuck normies so much.

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after almost 4 fucking month
here in the west people will chimpout in 2 weeks

THE MASTERS WILL BE POSTPONED OVER CORONAVIRUS FEARS

checked and kekd

i saw it was back to 3 earlier
nice try fed, i guess

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it's all daijobu, we'll sacrifice the canadian cuck and his wife

hello darkness my old friend

The fuck is going on

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Brazil President Bolsonaro says has tested NEGATIVE for coronavirus

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I'm out in bumfuck NC I rarely leave my land or home.

I prepped two months ago and have my own chikens and garden.

I'm one of the few who will live user

It's still a nothingburger *crunch*

Turkey has more Corona than most other countries. There cases of corona refugees from Turkey.
Turkey is just too poor for tests

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Hey anons, I have a bad post nasal drip, a coof, and shortness of breath (to the point I have mild chest pains when I breath deeply). I do not have a fever.
Does the lack of fever despite the other symptoms indicate this is NOT coronavirus? Is it likely just a cold?

WTF happened to all the cases in USA? they're disappearing from the john hopkins map

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have they said anything useful at a WHO briefing in the last 2 weeks? i gave up on those pretty quickly

If those half wits don't be a bit more realistic on what they buy. It will give govermentss the excuse to implement forced rationing and issuing ration cards/books

Test was negative

In north west england
and i feel like coofing, cant tell if its in my head or not

Spain has declared statute of emergency.
At least they did it sooner than Italy did.

>twitter.com/jairbolsonaro/status/1238490282385080322
Yeah, sure lmao

dont care about anyone else and just buy all the good useful stuff now before they wake up

If you want more than 1 roll of tp you have to send over your mom aswell

t. your neighbor

They are refusing to go out and lie because they know they will be hung from the streets if this is close to the medium fears of Yas Forums.

Boomer model infected

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Aliens came down and cured everyone

No, but I'm just watching it to get mad and laugh.

Probably. And that will trigger the Stafford act from '88 so it's not that huge of a deal but more help for the states financially and otherwise.

>muh stocks, muh cash

jhu map is bugging out today. italy and japan were disappearing earlier as well.

I want to see chimp outs and gun fires at Muttmarts this weekend.

Include me in the cap!

>Yes its important to have comedy during such times

You misspelled Comey.

no one cares about boomer ball. If you watch that shit, you should get it. I use to work for a grounds crew and played golf but watching it is the dumbest shit ever. Golf is an excuse to get drunk.

stupid as fuck, there wont be any smokers left after corona

LEL

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fucking turdos

Damage control, thankfully the internet is forever.

>WEST VIRGINIA
>ZERO CONFIRMED CASES
>ALL SCHOOLS SHUT DOWN INDEFINITELY