/cvg/ - Corona Virus General #1906 - PANDEMIC EDITIONS

Shitposting aside i legitimately think i have corona, i woke up this morning with a sore throat and thought it would be gone after 2 hours, it still strong, i keep coughing up mucus and its itching, my eyes keep tearing up also, i have been feeling tired lately, also its not just the symptoms, i have a feeling, and its rarely wrong, and this feeling tells me i am very fucked.

No, get your own thread.

This is the real happening:

New York Sending National Guard To Control Coronavirus Spread In NYC Suburb

Chimpout happenings are assured.

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PAN(DEM)IC

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>first case in state university
>dad works there
AH FUCK. IM SO FUCKED

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TEN-FOUR BIG OL' SOMETHI' BURGER HAPPENING OUT THERE OVER.
youtube.com/watch?v=IOgUaFkpS3Y

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Denver International Airport employee sick
Mayor sent out this email to everyone
He's a maintenance worker

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clown world

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Literally nothing

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DENMARK ON COMPLETE LOCKDOWN FROM TOMORROW
>DENMARK ON COMPLETE LOCKDOWN FROM TOMORROW
DENMARK ON COMPLETE LOCKDOWN FROM TOMORROW
>DENMARK ON COMPLETE LOCKDOWN FROM TOMORROW

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>removing the ((( )))
Fag

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kek

We are about to witness the utter and absolute destruction of human society. Let that sink in.

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>Pastabros, any new videos from Italy?
Pastabros, any new videos from Italy?
>Pastabros, any new videos from Italy?
Pastabros, any new videos from Italy?
>Pastabros, any new videos from Italy?
Pastabros, any new videos from Italy?

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(You)
Keep me posted burger bro

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Great East (France) now officially a region with high risk of infection according to RKI

was funny the first 5 times, it looks like a mess

Why am i not seeing any (you)'s on replies on this board

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>UK government have done fuck all still

We are going to be so fucked you guys don’t even know

Sao Paulo is fucked. I'm going to prepare before the inevitable quarantine

I'm starting to get real scared by this thing, Fucking maggy de block of butter does fucking nothing and people are starting to lose their temper over the lack of info or strong directives. I don't think it wil be long before actual riots

*coof coof*

suddenly the mural has a new meaning

Just bought 3 40 roll toilet paper stacks.

Gonna exchange this for a camaro in about a year and outfit said camaro with hood-mounted mini guns. See you boys in the thunder-dome. My combat name will be Hugh Dickus

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swiss gov does not care about testing young ppl. how the fuck are we handeling as shitty as iran is

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sauce nao, fagget

>chimpout
they're going to get infected and blame white people. Just wait and see, they'll storm white populated areas to spread this shit.

I want the CDC to be fully defunded after this shitshow

>closest we'll get to a habbening and it's a fucking glorified cold that will peter out in a few months

not fair

Denmark closing schools, it's habbening!!!

Brazil announced 18 new cases today. Official total of confirmed cases is up to 52.

>Wake up sweating in the AC
>Heavy breathing and shortness of breath.

It's all over.

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Just wash your hands bro

>UPDATE ON GERMANY 11.03.

>343 NEW INFECTIONS:
>1908 TOTAL INFECTIONS +22%
>1 NEW DEATH:
>3 TOTAL DEATHS +50%
last update: 11.03. 16:30 GMT
source: worldometers.info/coronavirus/

>RKI reports:
+271 = 1567 cases
updated: 11.03. 14:00 GMT

>3 DEAD (11.03.)
woman, 89, 03.03.: accute diarhea, low bloodpressure, pneumonia, tested, ICU, 09.03.: lung failure
man, 78, diabetis, heart condition, 09.03.: heart failure
man, 73, severe comorbidity, pneumonia, 11.03.: lung failure

>German Virologist: Seasonal effect is minor. Situation might not look bad, but will change. Majority of population will get infected.

>Merkel: Up to 70% might get infected.

>11.03.
4 infections in EU-comission
1 suspected case in german parliament, some spd politicians in home-quarantine
Heinsberg: authorities can no longer control wether citizens obey home-quarantine, but citizens were cooperating without exception before
RKI declares Elsass and Lothringen risk-zones
Federal ministry of finance approves additional 650 million for protective supplies
Teacher-union demands closing of schools
Semester-start in Bayern, Berlin and Baden-Württemberg delayed until 20.04.
First death in Sweden: man, old, ICU in Huddlinge, south of Stockholm
Potsdam: child, 2, in ICU, stable, not in danger of death
Switzerland: expert warns about infection via money
RKI: we have to bring distance between citizens to prevent infection
German army: 9 infected, 45 suspected
RKI: virus going to keep spreading in china
WHO declares SARS-CoV-2 outbreak a pandemic
1 FDP politician infected
Multiple german tv-shows without live audience
source: Welt, Zeit, ntv, others

>PREVIOUS REPORT ON GERMANY:
pastebin.com/UjyvedMg

>INFORMATION ON ADE, 2 SARS-CoV-2 STRAINS AND REINFECTION:
pastebin.com/EWvhqN3k

>MAP OF INFECTIONS IN GERMANY:
google.com/maps/d/viewer?mid=1yCPR-ukAgE55sROnmBUFmtLN6riVLTu3&ll=50.67164189828799,11.771968833779965&z=6

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WA GOV says you will KILL YOUR GRANDPA if you go near him!

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nice quads spain

All Spanish nurses complaining they're only giving them ONE mask a day.
We're so fucked and we're gonna make Italy look like state of the art emergency handling.

Can anyone give me ncbi sources of age and health condition hazards with covid and flu for comparison? Also, does anyone have flu stats?

I need this for conversation, ive been asked if i have any numbers that would prove that covid is more risk for my boomer hypertensive dad than influenza

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remember to spread the virus as much as you if do get infected. This corrupt system must collapse

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my gp9 gasmask has rubber bands inside the filterhole that make it hard for me to put in filters should i remove them? since they dont let the filters seal 100%

Love is the cure to COVID-19

Dr. Masaru Emoto did a series of experiments to prove that consciousness has an effect on water, and that projecting positive or negative thoughts will have a profound impact on water. While water that has been exposed to positive thoughts would form balanced hexagonal crystals when frozen, those exposed to negative thoughts would create opposite results.

youtube.com/watch?v=7eNFlCA68nE

youtube.com/watch?v=tAvzsjcBtx8

A similar experiment, which anyone can replicate without lab equipment, has been done with boiled rice. In this experiment boiled rice is put into 3 jars and each is exposed to different vibratory thoughts and emotions. Showing that those jars exposed to negative vibrations will produce mould while those receiving positive vibrations will not, or much later.

youtube.com/watch?v=zvShgttIq7I

Wim Hof was injected with endotoxins and through meditation neglected the harmful effects caused by it, leaving doctors stunned.

youtube.com/watch?v=BqsvJedwUyg

YouTuber Mike Morales was reporting on the miraculous recovery of his wife, after she got into a heavy car accident. Doctors informed him that his wife had a rip in her aorta that would require surgery in order for his wife to survive. The next day, when they did another scan to prepare for surgery, they have found that the rip was perfectly healed, leaving the doctors stunned once more. Mike attributes this to the deep prayers sent by his subscribers.

youtube.com/watch?v=Jhj4TJrIHcc

Cannabis is said to have healing properties when it comes to fighting cancer. Not because of a substance that fights the cancer but the mental state that allows the patient to combat the tumor with positive thought, thanks to the elevated psychic abilities and interoception due to the consumption of cannabis.

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>BREAKING
BREAKING
>BREAKING

STARVING MONKEYS INVADE THAILAND CITIES DUE TO LACK OF TOURISTS FEEDING THEM

liveleak.com/view?t=kIuyP_1583930530

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>FEDERAL MINISTER OF HEALTH ANSWERS TO GERMAN PARLIAMENT (11.03.)

>situation in Germany
dynamic situation, difficulties ahead
no measure can prevent spread, only slow it down
no federation-wide closing of schools or day-cares
parents have to go to work, children would still infect each other and also grandparents, if they took care of them

>german preparations
28000 ICU-beds, some occupied, freeing up capacity
getting more healthcare workers
prevent shortages of supplies, capacities and medical personel
no guarantee that all german cases can be treated properly

>helping other countries
german cases have priority
help european and international partners with supplies and testing-capacity, as long as not needed in Germany
Germany gifted supplies to China earlier, now China offers supplies and even ventilators to EU

>STUDY OF 650 GERMAN CASES (11.03.)

Age:
11: under 5
14: between 5 and 15
547:between 15 and 60
75: 60 or older

Sex 54% men

2% developed pneumonia

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Quarantine zones for all that have been infected only logical solution. Infected are infected for life. They will have outbreaks, get weaker, and infect others, until they die. World population must be made safe. This strategy works, and is most efficient, least expensive. It is how incurable diseases like leprosy were brought under control. Quarantine of 250k now saves 7 billion lives. Quarantine of under 5,000, and entry quarantines wipes disease out in USA in 2 weeks. Give them good housing, make them very comfortable, just segregate them from the un-infected population.

Elsas?

I need corona-chan fart porn

>mask out of stock
>that other one also out of stock
>outrageous price
>expeditor: china
I'm fucked here, guess it doesn't matter since I can't follow a proper decontamination procedure anyway

>pandemic
It's really not a nothing burger, is it?

>+400 dead in a day

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Hopefully this disease gets contained in the sanctuaries where it belongs!

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Tell them to make their own masks lol

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Catalonia: if we don't test, we have no cases.

here, have a (you)

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>health pack as flag
>don't care about health

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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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Yeah.. people aren't really saying it.. but China survived because they have a hive mind and a racial idendity. Multiculturalism has destroyed our identity as a country and we're fucked.

Thanks liberal fucks.

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God damn I fucking love this shit.

My dick is fucking diamonds right now.

>can't do chinky chong funny face by pulling your eyes into slits any more
>because slitty-eyed chinky chong bastards have made it so I will infect myself with their filthy disease if I touch my face
Fucking chinky chong bastards.

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ALL UNIVERSITIES IN FLORIDA ORDERED TO MOVE TO ONLINE TEACHING TO PREVENT CORONAVIRUS SPREAD

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AFTER 442 INFECTED, DENMARK GOES UNDER ALMOST TOTAL LOCKDOWN - ORDER FROM PRIME MINISTER.

>ALL SCHOOLS CLOSED FOR 2+ WEEKS, ALL PUBLIC WORKERS WITHOUT CRITICAL JOBS TO BE SENT HOME FOR 2+ WEEKS WITH PAY. EVERY RELIGIOUS PLACES ENCOURAGED TO DO THE SAME.
>NO INDOOR EVENTS WITH 100+ PEOPLE
>ONLY SELECT FEW COUNTRIES ALLOWED TO BE TRAVELED TO
>ALL HOSPITAL AND NURSING HOMES ARE STRONGLY ENCOURAGED TO HAVE NO VISITORS WHAT-SO-EVER FOR 2+ WEEKS.
>"MORE REQUIREMENTS CAN AND WILL BE PUT IN PLACE IF NECESSARY"

WAY MORE SHIT WAS SAID BUT I COULDN'T CATCH IT ALL FAST ENOUGH.

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he wont listen anyway
just do what i do:
keep fearmonger and doomsay like a maniac until you can say "i told you so"

i don't even care about this anymore
fuckin end us if you will cunt

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Expect Colorado numbers to begin to spike
thedenverchannel.com/news/national/coronavirus/colorados-first-drive-up-covid-19-testing-facility-opens-in-denver-is-free-of-charge

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There are three places in the world where they've got Coronavirus under control:
>Hong Kong
>Taiwan
>Singapore
And in all three cases they've did so by acting quickly. But they were only able to act quickly because they went through this shit 17 years ago with SARS. They also had Bird and Pig flu to deal with. They learned some very hard lessons almost 2 decades ago, applied them, practiced with them, and were prepared for Corona-chan. The West, having almost no experience with anything like this, is completely ill-prepared.

transcription of whatsapp audio of two doctors talking about their experiences in Italy (2 days old)
>files.catbox.moe/3ns6c1.mp4

a Channel4 interview with the ICU coordinator for Lombardy
>youtube.com/watch?v=9mrPHO-nkVE

Joe Rogan Experience podcast with infectious disease expert Michael Osterholm
>youtube.com/watch?v=E3URhJx0NSw

Sam Harris podcast with Nicholas Christakis, Yale professor and researcher of social networks, biosocial science, behavior genetics, and public health
>samharris.org/podcasts/190-respond-coronavirus/
Sam Harris podcast with infectious disease specialist Amesh Adalja
>samharris.org/podcasts/191-early-thoughts-pandemic/

Nice stats and graphs on hidden cases
>medium.com/@tomaspueyo/coronavirus-act-today-or-people-will-die-f4d3d9cd99ca

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We, stunning people of Yas Forums, are the precursors on many things.
Being NEET was just another one.
The world will become NEET.
This is the beginning of the end.

You are almost too late. Run to the market today.

Will globohomo finally die after this event lads? Liberal democracies can only exist in affluence. This is our 'war' that brings down the current establishment

Does hand sanitizer kill covid

>CONTE TO GIVE "IMPORTANT UPDATES" AT 21:40 (CET)
CONTE TO GIVE "IMPORTANT UPDATES" AT 21:40 (CET)
>CONTE TO GIVE "IMPORTANT UPDATES" AT 21:40 (CET)
CONTE TO GIVE "IMPORTANT UPDATES" AT 21:40 (CET)
>CONTE TO GIVE "IMPORTANT UPDATES" AT 21:40 (CET)
CONTE TO GIVE "IMPORTANT UPDATES" AT 21:40 (CET)
>CONTE TO GIVE "IMPORTANT UPDATES" AT 21:40 (CET)
CONTE TO GIVE "IMPORTANT UPDATES" AT 21:40 (CET)
>CONTE TO GIVE "IMPORTANT UPDATES" AT 21:40 (CET)
CONTE TO GIVE "IMPORTANT UPDATES" AT 21:40 (CET)
>CONTE TO GIVE "IMPORTANT UPDATES" AT 21:40 (CET)
CONTE TO GIVE "IMPORTANT UPDATES" AT 21:40 (CET)
>CONTE TO GIVE "IMPORTANT UPDATES" AT 21:40 (CET)
CONTE TO GIVE "IMPORTANT UPDATES" AT 21:40 (CET)

We're going full Wuhan boys

We'll have that many in Berlin alone by end of next week.

this will never happen to são paulo
quarantine são paulo and brazil crashes
yep, not gonna happen
see the cases in brazil, most of them are almost recovered, even the old guys
at least in brazil it has been being just a flu

you'll survive

s o u r c e

PANDEMIC ANONS HOLY SHIT, MY COUNTRY IS SHUTTING DOWN
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SAVE MEEEE

UPDATE: ITS 514 INFECTED NOW.

>muh stigma
That is the pattern recognition part of your mind trying to save your ass from Corona-chan.
How can so many people be so over socialized that they ignore their survival instincts is beyond me.

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yes

Yes, Spain is oven, still public transport, still restaurants,bars,pubs,gyms, supermarket open to big public.

So you get tested. Then what? Testing isnt cure... either way, you got the answer you would get positive or negative. Go home, self isolate, and treat your symptoms yourself. You think they'll hook you up to a ventilator now if you're positive? Fuck off. All you dumb niggers thinking testing is the answer to everything.

This is not looking good

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Because you're a nobody, user.

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>he didn't prep

Elsass and Lothringen

2017, 2018, and 2019 were entirely empty, and /our guys/ got BTFO in most of the elections there.

It's like a glass bottle, you shake it, nothing come out, you shake it some more and strike it on the bottom, and suddenly a HAPPENING comes flooding out.

Which insurance does he have? Larp?

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Briton tests positive for coronavirus on cruise boat quarantined in Cambodia
11 March 2020 at 10:13am
itv.com/news/2020-03-11/briton-tests-positive-for-coronavirus-on-cruise-boat-quarantined-in-cambodia/

You're probably fine bro..corona is almost always a dry cough. If you have mucus this early it is probably a different sickness.

Rest lots and recover fast, so your immune system is not compromised when/if you do catch corona

Wow they want to flatten the curve. Something that our geniuses haven't yet understood.

Can someone post the guy who produced a mathematical model to almost exact accuracy predicting the figures of the number of infected in China for each day? This was like a month ago

Chicago and Philadelphia didn't cancel though. It's like Americans just have to have these superspreader events evey week.

sauce? saude.gov hasn't updated yet

Will we go tribal with AKs?

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When does Canada go under quarantine? I wanna lay in bed and be comfy all day.

>UK government
>caring about anyone
hmmmm

This didnt have to happen like this, why did they let this get as bad?
God fucking damnit I want a lockdown

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Greekbros what the fuck was the message we received on our phones? what was it's purpose?

We are at 514 you fucking nonce

I've been doing this with my mom. Not working on my sister. Thinking of getting her kicked out of the house.

MAP UPDATE
MAP UPDATE

Happeningfags memed this into reality. Get right with the LORD; As ye sow, so shall ye reap.

War, Famine, & Pestilence are here.

Hail kek lord of chaos, bringer of bantz