Brit/pol/ - Wash your hands, Edition

Coronavirus: Specialist unit set up to counter false claims
technicallyfunny.net/2020/03/coronavirus-specialist-unit-set-up-to.html

>Coronavirus: UK cases rise by 46 - taking total to 319
news.sky.com/story/coronavirus-uk-coronavirus-cases-rise-46-in-24-hours-taking-total-to-319-11953529

>Counter-terror police probe threat of violent 'incels': Specialist officers look into misogynistic 'involuntary celibate' sub-culture in UK after suspect leaves threatening messages online
dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8088975/Counter-terror-police-probe-violent-incels-suspect-leaves-threatening-messages-online.html

>Trevor Phillips suspended from Labour over Islamophobia allegations
bbc.co.uk/news/uk-51797316

> Live FTSE routed on worst day since financial crisis as oil prices crash – live updates
telegraph.co.uk/business/2020/03/09/markets-live-latest-news-ftse-100-pound-euro/

>Man 'carrying two knives' shot dead by police in central London
news.sky.com/story/man-shot-dead-by-police-in-westminster-11953449


>Wales Is Home to the Baked Bean Museum of Excellence
walesonline.co.uk/whats-on/whats-on-news/what-its-like-inside-wales-14443317

>Series of Binfires reported in Ipswich over night
ipswichstar.co.uk/news/ipswich-suffolk-police-bin-fire-1-6547254

>Youths sought over raging Binfire near housing estate
newsandstar.co.uk/news/18286784.youths-sought-raging-bin-fire-near-housing-estate/

>Supermarket staff and public put out Barking Binfire
barkinganddagenhampost.co.uk/news/barking-bin-fire-1-6533380

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Other urls found in this thread:

bbc.co.uk/news/health-51800707
youtube.com/watch?v=YMmgGgCIJGg
bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-51806925
twitter.com/BRITs/status/1229868584974868480
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300118
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300239
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300193
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300300
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300021
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300183
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300270
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300075
twitter.com/SkyNews/status/1237140387594219520
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

>Coronavirus symptoms 'take five days to show'
bbc.co.uk/news/health-51800707
more downplaying from the media. the incubation period is more like 24-40 days.

First for coronavirus being fuck all to worry about.

First for i conquer my vices tomorrow

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Try having an immune system stronger than a sick kitten.

ethanol/isopropanol = hand gel
sodium lauryl sulphate = soap
sodium hypochlorite = bleach
and for toilet paper you can use the quran.

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24-40 days? Wow
I can't believe it's 41-50 days.
51-70 days is such a long incubation period!
Wow, so in 85 days time well all bead.
At least I'll see my birthday. In 91 days.

is it true that it dissolves people's skin? leaving them a pink and throbbing half man whose only recourse is to murder and maim in a vain attempt at finding purpose in a searing life of agony for which there is no one to blame?

Economic crash soon brothers.

The fire rises.

youtube.com/watch?v=YMmgGgCIJGg

܆Hi brit/pol/
I'm an alien whose landed on your island, why do you live here?
It's always rainy and some bad darker man tried to stab me

>something that has HIV in it is nothing to worry about

do us a favour and just abduct all the dark ones? don't mind what you do with them, give them a planet if you like. i'll let you ride in my dad's jag with us if you do.

>a pink and throbbing half man whose only recourse is to murder and maim in a vain attempt at finding purpose in a searing life of agony for which there is no one to blame

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you utter spastic kindly off yourself

that Italian fella will get corona virus haha

Stupid corona spastics

Hopefully so and they blame it all on breggers and antifags start attacking suspected right wing groups. Nothing ever happens though.

>that Italian fella will get corona virus haha

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bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-51806925
>More than 300 complaints that rapper Dave's performance at the Brit Awards was racist against white people have been rejected by the UK media watchdog.
I was much more offended by that walrus being forced to dance for entertainment desu
twitter.com/BRITs/status/1229868584974868480

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if someone told you to jump off a bridge you'd do it, wouldn't you?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA
MOST OF YOU LOW IMMUNE SYSTEM NOODLE CHOMPNG SQUAWKING NEETS WILL BE DEAD IN THREE MONTHS FUCKING KEK

came all this way and you can't even speak english properly. fucking spastic aliens

even the MSM has admitted that it behaves like HIV.

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Im fucking bored of hearing about it now lad desu.

go to /bant/ if you can't handle the biggest happening in over 100 years.

How’s it going lads, only one person dead in Germany atm despite 5x the amount of infected as the UK...

I hope the pakis over there get it

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>Revoke the TV licence using legislation
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300118

>Release the Home Office's Grooming Gang Review in full
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300239

>Ensure, where possible, government contracts are awarded to UK companies
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300193

>Repeal the Fixed Term Parliaments Act.
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300300

>Prohibit MPs from voting in parliament when under the influence of alcohol
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300021

>Equal (50/50) rights for both parents in the event of a separation.
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300183

>Change the Sexual Offences Act so women can be charged with rape against males
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300270

>Hold an inquiry into how the police handle historic sexual abuse cases.
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300075

Guys I decided to switch from coffee to tea because coffee has too much caffeine. What kind of tea is best?

>even the MSM has admitted that this virus behaves in the same way as other viruses
i know

how pleased were you to have the perfect image? be honest lad

it's not going away. we haven't even hit the really bad part yet.

how about you kys

just buy some tea nigger

Piss off pube

That gypsy is cute why was ed robbing her?

Yorkshire Tea.

IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN YOU

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No.

go outside you stupid vrigins

petition.parliament.uk/petitions/300239
Under 2,500 left to go to get it debated

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5 day incubation period, spastech, another gold star for /cvg/

܇How do you ride a cat? It's to small
The dark ones are too violent for us aliens to grant them a planet
܇That's not very nice
Maybe you light ones aren't much better

I ain't racist but tweets like that really piss me off because like yeah of course it's a thing to report on that white British in London is becoming a smaller demographic that's the first time that's happened in the history of our country. Not saying it's a bad thing it's just an interesting thing and press should be able to report on it

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Earl Grey.

Dont call me that
I'll see if it's available here thanks bro

post a picture incel

Quite pleased tbqhwy.

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So it might change a womans sex, becoming a half man.
Fuck sake this will be chaos.

Is that you Alice Grant?

extremely correct opinion my man, seconding this

alien music has 13 tones though.

fuck off we're full

Based.

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based

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ffs another mong who can't read. 100k doesn't guarantee it gets debated

knowing our corrupted parliament, it'll get discussed for the better part of 2 minutes, a wink wink, nudge nudge and DONE, it's never to be brought up again

reminder

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Is this accurate?

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>too violent for us aliens to grant them a planet
mate i was just being PC vaporise them ffs

impossiburu

>First phase was, "Wash your hands and sing happy birthday"
I cant wait to see what extensive preparations have/are going to be made for phase two...

twitter.com/SkyNews/status/1237140387594219520

܇What is an 'incel'?
It sounds like something a ulgy person would say
܇I have heard your 'oasis'
They are not very good

Guess who this is about:

>"All his life he had explosive outbursts in which he expressed a wish for wholesale destruction. I believe they have to do with his sense of alienation from the world, which itself was a lifelong theme and which, as he grew older, took more and more the form of a rejection of the world as an evil place - am attitude that was to acquire philosophical underpinning with his discovery of Schopenhauer. In fact it was immediately after his first reading of Schopenhauer that he wrote in a letter to Liszt, in October 1854: 'Let us treat the world only with contempt; for it deserves no better; but let no hope be placed in it, that our hearts be not deluded! It is evil, evil, fundamentally evil [...] Away with it!'"