Post cannibalism
Starting off with this monster.
Cannibalism thread
This is the closest thing I have
Horrifying. Spoiler that in the future before I get promoted.
Sorry bruv, please forgive me
That is a large bread, would she mind sharing?
I would like a bite.
Here you are my good man
Thank you, thank you so much.
You are a very kind lady.
Cute thread
You're very welcome, it has been an honour
I a friend of mine builds ships, but now he's working at home due to the pandemic.
His sails are going through the roof.
I was so bored, sitting is my house, I decided to memorize 6 pages of the dictionary.
I learned next to nothing,
Blind Hookers.
You gotta hand it to 'em.
Cut my finger slicing cheese, I think I'm going to be dealing with grater problems in the future.
"I'm no good at playing darts," Tom said aimlessly.
An apple pie is 2$ in Jamaica and 3$ in the Bahamas.
These are the pie-rates of the Caribbean
"I'll have a bowl of Chinese bat soup," Tom said wantonly.
Tom is dead now.
Welcome to plastic surgery addicts anonymous.
I see quite a few new faces here today and I must say I am very disappointed.
"This milk isn't fresh," Tom said sourly.
I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.
"Let's visit the tombs," Tom said cryptically.
I lol'd
Bought a reversible jacket today.
Can't wait to see how it turns out.
"I hope I can still play guitar," Tom fretted.
"I'm wearing a ribbon round my arm," said Tom with abandon.
Thank you bro
A steak pun is a rare medium to be well done.
"I need a pencil sharpener," said Tom bluntly.
Can't take my dog to the pond anymore. Ducks keep attacking him.
That's what I get for buying a pure-bread dog
"There must be a power cut," said Tom delightedly.
These jokes...
Yes?
Guy walks into a bar holding a pair of jumper cables.
Bartender says "Hey buddy, I hope you're not trying to start something".
I can't believe this little girl is a murderer.
Where's the joke, user?
"The doctor had to remove my left ventricle," said Tom half-heartedly.
You hear about the lad who lost an arm and a leg in a shark accident?
The doctors said he's all right, but the nurses said there was nothing left.
That's nothing compared to the army Major who survived mustard gas and got pepper sprayed.
He's a seasoned veteran, alright.
Plane touches down, bit of a bumpy landing. Cabin attendant over the intercom says "Sorry about the rough landing, but please try and understand. It's not my fault. It's not the captain's fault. It's the asphalt."
There's no need for a joke. I just thought she was cute and wanted to show her to you.
OK, how about this: the fact that she consists of almost 100% sugar, and is eating sugary shit all the time, makes her a cannibal.
Thank you for showing me, she is a cute girl.
It's nice to know that there's another cannibal in the show.
I think anime needs moar cannibals.
This girl would eat absolutely anyone if her crush told her to do so.
I laughed much harder than it deserved
THEY'RE GREAT AREN'T THEY?
So, a little old lady shows up at the Doctor's office.
Doctor, she says. I've been having terrible gas constantly. The fortunate thing is that it's completely silent, and there's no odor at all.
As a matter of fact, I've farted at least twenty times while in your waiting room.
Doctor responds, Interesting. Well, take two of these, and come back next week.
She departs.
She comes back the following week.
Doctor! She exclaims. I don't know what you gave me, but now my farts, while still silent, smell like death!
Doctor responds:
Good, good.
Now that we've cleared out your sinuses, let's get to work on your hearing.
Keep em' coming, still laughing at these stupid dumb jokes
What do the Quran and hydrazine have in common?
They're both radical initiators.
Avoid public places lads, especially the plague-grounds
"What are you waiting for? I'm ready to eat, come on!"
Famous last words.
What's the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts?
very comfy thread, liking these dumb jokes
Beer nuts are quite expensive, whereas deer nuts are always under a buck.
How could the center be cooked all the way?
The bread is normal sized, it just appears massive in her arms.
"Room for dessert?" The waiter asked.
"No thanks, I'll eat it out here."
Go back to Yas Forums.
A wise man once said "Nothing is better than sheer bliss."
An even wiser baker said "But isn't a simple bread better than nothing."
Go back to pleddit
You hear about the guy who was attacked by a frozen bat?
He got Frostbite.
I don't use reddit.
Originally, I wasn't going to get a brain transplant.
But then I changed my mind.
What did the toaster say to the bread?
"You're toast!"