/smg/ - Stock Market General

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Misc:
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Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=EueTw6utIVM
politico.com/states/florida/story/2020/03/24/governors-beg-for-cash-as-unemployment-claims-crush-states-1268856?fbclid=IwAR0F60-zJKPMQp9Qbt73yeT7_CVNV3mT8tibhfrynlW42nvGbPX7RXefZH4
twitter.com/AnonBabble

two men

>ANOTHER GREEN DAY TOMORROW BOYS

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G R E E N
T O M O R R O W

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The Dow will plunge to 10k by may 2nd.

CHECKED

BEARBROS B T F O

Unemployment numbers leaked: 2 million

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Ready for the bulltrap to pop on the jobless claims, friends?

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REAL THREAD:

nobody is willing to sit on that amount of cash, but it will plunge again for one reason or another

>talk about 2.5 million jobless claims for a week
>sell off on 2 million jobless claims
eh. maybe

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nikkei down 3%, is this bullish?

do you have bat flu user?

Yeah, I'm 27 so I'll live, but this is the 2nd worst illness I've had, the top being appendicitis.

So buy puts all the way down.

hope you aren't taking fever reducers user. Power through it or else

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>Ruins your whole life

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Thanks user, muscle ache is very bad, even typing is a chore

At this point a nuclear holocaust would be bullish as long as orange nigger's kike pals decide they'd like their bags pumped a liiiiiiiiittle bit more before they cash out and meme on the handful of goys who believed that they were "buying the dip"

Any source on the 2M jobless leak?

You can do it bro watch some good mobis

I'm popping down to the shops for some toilet paper and beer. Could you guys watch my bat? None of you fuckers eat it okay?

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>the top being appendicitis
oh, you must've perforated. my appendicitis wasn't nearly as bad as my last flu-like thing, which was vomiting followed by a couple days without food or the ability to get around the house without nearly fainting.

why shouldn't we take fever reducers?

let your body fight off the virus. I think reducing your temp might be a little counter productive

children's tylenol is fin but i wouldn't take anything else as they can make viruses worse

Some but not all doctors (including my personal favourite, John Campbell, although he's technically got a PhD in nursing) think that reducing the fever reduces the immune response, because that's the entire point of the fever.

Fever is the body's immune response to many types of infection. It raises the internal temperature of the body to inhospitable levels. Fever reducers can lead to impaired immune function, leading the virus to take better hold in your respiratory. It can turn a mild case into a more severe case.

disclaimer: all of this is completely out of my ass but that's my understanding of it

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makes the virus kill you faster

I just caught it on the closed captioning on dick durban on the senate floor, I'm gonna try to find it

AAAAACHOOO
coof coof
herro, who bat is this? I have? Who bat?

I eat bat, ok whittu piggu?
AaaaaCHRROOOO

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The bull market lasted so long investors have forgotten what it looks like warning lights start blinking, let alone when ALL of them are blinking.
There are so many incomprehensible gains right now. Delta, Boeing, Ford, Carnival, etc.

youtube.com/watch?v=EueTw6utIVM
go back about 20 minutes (8:23pm EST) he says 2 million last week vs 218k the previous week

This thread. I choose U.

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Long term puts for all of them.

kek, no wonder we're fucked. the damn test kits were fucked right from the get go. they had a working model specs from the WHO but they decided to build there own version of it instead. then there is more testing labs available via the military but they ain't using them.

Sauce?

How do you know that's a "leak" and not just a senator repeating what he heard on CNN, which heard it from Morgan Stanley like the rest of us?

>Carnival
At this rate soon I'll make double my investment if the upswing keeps on.

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>UNEMPLOYMENT REPORTS 2 MILLION - BELOW EXPECTED
UNEMPLOYMENT REPORTS 2 MILLION - BELOW EXPECTED
>UNEMPLOYMENT REPORTS 2 MILLION - BELOW EXPECTED
UNEMPLOYMENT REPORTS 2 MILLION - BELOW EXPECTED
>UNEMPLOYMENT REPORTS 2 MILLION - BELOW EXPECTED
UNEMPLOYMENT REPORTS 2 MILLION - BELOW EXPECTED

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I didn't say it was a leak, he just read it out loud on the senate floor. He didn't say where it was from or that it was an estimate, so I asked if anyone knew where he was getting it from

Post source faggot

>im-fucking-plying

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Senate meeting 30 minutes ago

>0.006% unemployment
please tell me we are going to have a civil war tomorrow

Hmm, three possible things. Either the Virus just can't be contained and kills a hell of a lot of people soon. Or we contain it and life goes on but the Global warming thing kills everyone left no mater what before the 21st century ends

That senator could have been talking out of his ass, give an actual source

How many of you fucking retards have balls of steel like me and ate going to hodl SQQQ over the weekend as this shit all gets priced in?

Gonna go take a hot bath thanks bro

You'll find out the hard way tomorrow, bearfag

Depends on what happens tomorrow and Friday.

>Global warming
>existing

The expected was 1.5 million a few days ago. This is the same game they play with earnings, just shit out an unrealistic number so that when the real number comes out it's a "big beat"

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2 million is still fucking terrible.

That's why you take acetaminophen (Tylenol), and not ibuprofen. Ibuprofen actually lowers your fever, acetaminophen just helps dullen the sensation.

>that pic
GIWTWM
also
>wanted to pay for a mixed wrestling session so cutie athletic grill could choke me out like that
>now economy is tanking and I have tenuous job security so I have to conserve money

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And below estimates. That's bullish, dipshit

If it hasn't dropped by friday I'm buying in. No way they can sustain this with another weekend of closures coming up

I don't have any choice but to cling to my puts compadre. I'm like 50% down.

PRICED IN

2 million people not working is
PRICED
R
I
C
E
D

I
N

Was the third thing we cant contains the virus but global warming kills it off and my oil stocks moon?

Oh shit
Red.
Red.
Red.

It's not even accurate it turns out because holy shit it's worse.
politico.com/states/florida/story/2020/03/24/governors-beg-for-cash-as-unemployment-claims-crush-states-1268856?fbclid=IwAR0F60-zJKPMQp9Qbt73yeT7_CVNV3mT8tibhfrynlW42nvGbPX7RXefZH4
>At least 2.2.
>One place got 1.5 million at least.
>California at least 700K in a week
>State unemployment funds are insolvent even if the Stimulus was passed.
I don't think you realize how bad that is.

are you really taking into account every single person in the US in that calculation? lmao brainlet

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be nice not everyone knows the difference between prevalence and incidence