/smg/ - Stock Market General

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another crab day
boring

IF THIS MARKET WERE ANY MORE VOLATILE IT'D BE USED IN A MOAB

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AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH WHY ISN'T IT GOING UP

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UNLIMITED MONEY YAASSSSSS

CLOOOOOOOOOWN WORLD

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FUCK BEARS AND FUCK BULLS
I NEED MY 2ND CIRCUIT BREAK

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TO 17K WE GO BABY WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

THE FEDS ARE FUCKING RETARDED HOLY SHIT

ROBINHOOD IS FROZEN AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

POOMP IT

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what's the point of infinite money if it doesn't work?

JEROOOOOMEEEEE

IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE GREEN

NANI THE FUCK

HOW!?

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i already masturbated twice today, stop this market please i can only handle so much

ITS PUMPING AGAIN

POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMP

>baldman yelling the economy

FED ON SUICIDE WATCH

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can't wait for this fuck to drown in his own fluids

My marketrinos...

SQQQ bros, when are we selling??

maybe before lunch

UNLIMITED PRINTER WORKS

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It's a nothingburger

Why do you bother wiping up the lube, your just gonna get fucked again.

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32

FUCK YOU JEROME JUST LET IT DIE YOU KIKE

buckle up, boys
today is grand closing

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17K 17K 17K 17K 17K 17K

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>FEDS PUMP JUST TO AVOID CIRCUIT BREAKERS
FUCK FEDS
FUCK FEDS
FUCK FEDS
FUCK FEDS
FUCK FEDS

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we've realized if this is necessary things are even more fucked than we thought before

CLOWN MARKET
>CLOWN MARKET
CLOWN MARKET
>CLOWN MARKET
CLOWN MARKET
>CLOWN MARKET
CLOWN MARKET
>CLOWN MARKET

>he actually thought it would be a green day

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if they have infinite money why dont they just put the DOW to 20000000 right this second?

ITS OVER

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THE DOW IS COMING BACK BROS

TURN THE FIELDS PINK

Bullbros....I dont feel so good...

Do one for bears

It's going to be another one of these days isn't it?

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DOW will drop to 6000

>being able to afford lube in this economy
we got a rich boy over here, guys! quick, let's steal his TP!

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It went green for a moment... That's a good sign, right?

WHY IS VIX UP BUT UVXY IS DOWN????

Holy shit the PPT really has no power any more do they? What an embarrassment

What cause this crash? We were way up in the futures.

Aaaaand we’re back!

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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

What's the move?

DUMP IT

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Futures were a fake and gay fed pump

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FUCK YOU BIZ YOU SAID IT WOULD BE RED NOW ALL MY INVESTMENTS ARE RED INSTEAD

HE'S GOING OVER THAT CLIFF

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>missed google at 1050 because etoro was slow

THE FORBIDDEN TECHNIQUE JEROME
YOU HAVE TO USE IT

Will TVIX go up today bros?

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THE FED LIED

Where is your big drop Bobobitches?

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Huh -- seems we're a tad fucked.

You should’ve known retard

fuck whats happening

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Gamblers were wrong

market movers actually know history and that UNLIMITED MONEY is a bad idea

Coronachan works in mysterious ways

WTF IS GOING ON DO I SELL MY PUTS AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Just look at the size of those dildos.

PPT, hiding your shit in the futures is easier. Shifted 1500 points on the up and now the market is opening its cratering.

Why are we still crashing??

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BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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i dont understand how a nothingburger virus that only kills people on government assistance has the power to destroy the global economy.

Imagine unironically being a b*ll
Imagine being so fucking wrong and retarded

SDOW printing today. Should've bought in on Friday like I told you lmaooooooooooooo

Dems shoot down corporate bail out. It's going down, bros. I never thought it'd happen in my lifetime. But it's finally ending.

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AND WHEN EVERYONE HAS INFINITE MONEY, NO ONE WILL BE RICH

>they thought they'd seen the bottom

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>ITS UP TO YOU DEMOCRATS. THE VOTE WILL HAPPEN 15 MINUTES AFTER MARKET OPEN

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how long until circuit breaker?

How much money can people still lose before they just have nothing to buy stocks with anyway?

Wew lad I'm glad I woke up in time to cancel my stop limit

HODL my sweet user, HODL!!!

There is still time to buy PMs
jmbullion.com/search/?q=#/?_=1&page=1&perpage=60&filter.instock.low=1&filter.instock.high=1

Here we go, boys

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TFW my broker only has lame SQQQ...

Go up, stupid!

Bullcucks got cocky
They saw green in the future and they bought
But bears always see the truth

ECONOMY: FUCKED
MARKET: FUCKED
AMERICA: FUCKED
FUCK THE FEDS
BURN IT DOWN

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It's going to dip below 18k today isn't it?

>>ITS UP TO YOU DEMOCRATS. THE VOTE WILL HAPPEN 15 MINUTES AFTER MARKET OPEN

It's at 1:00pm

Will stocks will shoot up once Congress passes the stimulus?

Money in weimar has no value, market smelled fear so we crash now get ready

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LOVING
EVER
LAUGH

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Allow me to explain:
>Oh shit, the fed's printing infinite money! That means they'll be able to keep businesses going!
>...
>Oh shit, the fed's printing infinite money! Nothing's actually changed fundamentally, the economy is still crashing, and all they're doing is bolstering inflation by injecting huge amounts of money into a contracting market!

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Because futures are made up bullshit. Went from down 1000 to up 700 and then opened down.

Yo, who else lost their job/got severe hours cut?

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>they drew a dick on the dow jones
>it was a dick pump

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BEAR SQUAD
WHERE YOU AT?

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JEROOOOOOMMMMMEEEEEEEEE WEEEEEE NEEEEEEEEED MOOOOOOORRRRRRREEEEEEEE

>550
>550
>550
>550

IT'S IN FREEFALL MODE NOW: SELL WHILE YOU CAN

Infinite pumping activated, we're going to soaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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>Cramer: We should quarantine everyone age 60+, test everyone below that with unlimited testing (currently being worked on), and get everyone back to work to fix the economy

is he right?

STOP FUCKING SELLING

WTF????

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youtube.com/watch?v=3nlvk7qFHTw

Whats this pattern called

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Most wealthy people in America are boomers.

CIRCUIT BREAKER INCOMING

You forgot the P at the end, user.

AND IM FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

FREE FALLLIIINNNN

>today

its gonna dip before noon

How the fuck did HARVEY get it?

Hahaha get fucked bulls.

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THE POOMP IS DOING NOTHING BROS LMAO

Tourist here,
yes it is going to be one of those days.

AAAAAAAHHHHHHH MOMMMMMY!!!!

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LMAO
SELL
SELL
SELL

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The markets are so batshit insane it wouldn't surprise me if it started moving LEFT instead of up or down.

You're a retard. Rest of you fuckers get out before it's too late

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BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

It's fucking over.

CAN ANYTHING STOP THIS FUCKING BEAR
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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ahem..
FUCK the stock market
and FUCK you

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see

>see dow at -550
>get up to take a piss
>come back
>-650

My wife's on indefinite furlough until her chain opens their stores again.

Russel 2000 is below 1000 lol

BURN IT THE FUCK DOWN

ITS ALMOST BACK TO WHERE IT WAS PRE PUMP
THE PUMP WAS USELESS
ABANDON ALL HOPE THIS IS THE END

classic pump and dump

>18,500

Middle finger to the bulls

Federal pump n dump

STOP FUCKING SELLING

Pretty much yeah. Fuck boomers.

The trillion dollar pump

SELL SELL SELL

>Money in weimar has no value, market smelled fear so we crash now get ready
Weimar? What are you talking about??

$V down 6% lmao buying the dip

the chad dip buy

KEEP FUCKING SELLING

FREE falling
PULL UP! JEROOOOM

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My SQQQ limits finally fired, lost a few dollars by setting it a hair bit low but I'm still comfortably in the green.

Time to sit on the sidelines and wait for cheap oil (not leveraged ETFs; if even half of those are alive in the next few months I'll be surprised)

Just resign Jerome, this is pathetic

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Printer broken.

jesus christ SDOW on a moon mission

Where's Carl? He was the only one worth watching, Cramer and Faber are dumbfuck permabulls

haha more like Russel 200 am i right?

-3% AFTER INFINITE MONEY
>SEEEEEEEEEEEL
-3% AFTER INFINITE MONEY
>SEEEEEEEEEEEL
-3% AFTER INFINITE MONEY
>SEEEEEEEEEEEL
-3% AFTER INFINITE MONEY
>SEEEEEEEEEEEL

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SELL QUICK
SELL BEFORE THEY SHUT IT ALL DOWN
FUCKING SELL

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JERRRRROMEEEEEEEE
MY SHECKELS
PUMP IT GOD DAMMIT YOU FED NIGGER

>"DON'T BUY! LET EM' BURN!"

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never stop buying

YOU TOLD ME THE FED NEWS WOULD PUMP IT!! DUMB FUCKERS

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"No one wants to be president Hoover."

I don't think "want" has anything to do it.

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I thought it would at least open green, grab some cheapy 3x inverse and then drop it in 5 minutes. Instead the fed is proven entirely ineffective.

BULLS BLOWN OUT LITERALLY EVERY MONDAY THIS WEEK

jerome's crusty dick

>He bought the dip

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Yeah we're going down

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its probably the best way to keep the economy ticking whilst not just sacrificing old people.

more people will die if they try to reopen everything but economy will be saved alot faster (which could save more lives)

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>no circuit breaker
YAAAAAAAWWWWWWNNNNNN

It did, for an hour. After two Wednesday’s ago when the fed pumped 500 billion and the bump only lasted for 15 minutes it should have made sense what would happen this time too

Drop below 1,000 already you greedy goddamn faggot GOOG so I can buy your whore ass stock

SQQQ ALL IN

AND WE ARE FREE FALLING, EVEN AFTER INFINITE MONEY

OHNONONONONOONONONO

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heh, you're welcome

what happens if the dow reaches 10k

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THERES JUST ONE FUCKING MONDAY THIS WEEK YOU FUCKING NIGGER

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BOOOORIIIING

FED going full Zimbabwe monetary policy

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>AMERICA : FUCKED
did you checked eu stocks?
when was the last time they were green?
15 days ago?
investing.com/indices/european-indices

Sell so hard that the market is fucked even after the coronavirus is solved.

TRUMPTOWNS IN CENTRAL PARK WHEN?

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jesus christ retards its been 14 minutes, it will be 19000 EOD

The Soup Line

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It continues downward

I LOVE YOU CORONOCHAN
YOU'RE THE IRONIC CURE TO THE FINANCIAL CANCER
Also suppose i have to thank the saudis and the rukies as well.

>dude some news buried under 10 pages of coronavirus about quantum easing or something the layman has equal (non-)understanding of is gonna pump the market despite 100k infected in the US in less than two days

I would absolutely love this because I work at a library where the only people that show up are boomers, basically means I go back to work but don't have to do any work

STOP BUYING

that dow tho

this week there's gonna be five

Does orange man speak today? If he does, maybe we can at least hit one.

>Printing all this money into an economy that'll just plummet anyways
>Not just handing out money to Americans who are no longer working

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AAAND WE'RE BACK
NEVER GOING BELLOW 18600 EVER AGAIN

It activates the multi-ball bonus

If unlimited QE is no big deal then why doesn't the FED do this as regular business? If there are no negative repercussions why not give our businesses the best chance to succeed in the wold market?

This presumably means both JPow and Trump have died of the 'rona

He absolutely is. This isn't worth causing a depression over. This sentiment will start making its waves in early April and the government will relax restrictions by the middle of that month.

Be ready to buy in May.

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every monday ameristonks are getting holocausted

STOP FUCKING CHEERING FOR A COLLAPSE YOU FUCKING LOSER

managed to short walt disney for some buckaroos

You mistyped 18200 bullcuck

Its coordinated manipulation between globalists, ccp, and the leftwing media.

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The virus should've already been priced in. So, this crash is caused by another catalyst?

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nah

fuck you faggot, may this whole system collapse

No, fuck the economy. CRASH IT

The DOW is having a seizure

back down we go

>he thinks this is actually printing money
yikes

>implying the EU even matters
I live in America I just want to taste Jerome's salty tears.

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>imagine ACTUALLY being bullish on this shit

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S&P 2100s today!!!!

YOU TOLD ME TO BUY ON FRIDAY EASY MONEY YOU SAID! NOW IM ALL RED ITS ALL GONE

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All in on inverse ETF, also should I try options.

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Look at what they are advertising for the opening bell.

LOOK AT IT!

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but we want to buy

The only one losing in the collapse scenario are boomers and people who are already rich, I don't give a fuck

Shouldn't you be posting on twitter Bill?

No.

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Make it 19500 because the bottom is already in.

"No"?

Anytime SP500 goes below its 200MA all bets are off, there's going to be an extended selloff. The first jolts are the smart money getting out quickly.

I bet Trump wishes he never took credit for this obvious bubble economy constructed by decades of neoliberal policy hollowing America out.

Should have just agreed with the liberals when they insisted Obama was responsible for this economy, cuz in many ways hes more responsible than Trump is.

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>Priced in

The entire world is frozen, you really think it'll be priced in?

>stuck holding bags from ATH
big ouchies but you only have yourself to blame

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>STOP FUCKING CHEERING FOR A COLLAPSE YOU FUCKING LOSER

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that's like saying "No, fuck this car, CRASH IT" while you're also in the car as a passenger.

This kiked system needs to crash and burn.

I don't know maybe the fact that the whole world is slowly shutting down?

Americans havent realised hwo fucked theyre about to get
The virus wont be priced in for another 4 weeks when they will really start to understand how many of them are going to die and how long they will be on national lockdown to stop it

lmao

$15 000 ready to buy :-) in the clown market

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BROS THE PUMP WORKED

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Yeah, the expected drop in demand.

fuck off we might as well have some fun with this mess

I'm laughing at all the bears who thought they'd be rich at open and I'm laughing at all the bulls who thought recession cancelled.

This message is brought to you by cash gang.

And?

NO

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lurk more

Now's the Time to go long. The stimulus is going to get passed.

Jew spotted.

niederauer sounds nervous

this

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These markets are history. They're not bothering to fix the underlying structural issues and you can tell just by watching price action and order flow on a day like today or any of these days recently that there is something horribly wrong with the actual core way in which trades execute. Dark pools, HFTs, broker/clearing house relationships, participant homogeneity, off exchange order flow, short sale restrictions, and on and on and on. These markets are so busted it's absurd and nothing you can do economically matters when the market is in its own distorted universe. The next big thing is going to be a totally new market system that competes against the current one. This one is a parasite riddled mess.

Nothing. Because it will never happen unless nukes start falling off from the sky!!

Keep holding buddy
Im shorting this ponzi with a smile

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>get everyone back to work
Back to wagecucking it so the next time the market fails you can be hung out to dry!

NO!

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18700 was too much

you know you can just kill yourself if you really want to die, right? no one will stop you, you don't have to wait for world events to decide things for you.

And the car is a broken kiked financial system that doesn't work and deserves a hard reset

what the fucking fuck makes you think it's priced in? Are you retarded? We don't even begin to understand how much this is going to effect not just the global market but everyday life yet. Wait till it starts putting boomers in the fucking dirt

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AHHHHHHHHHH

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Graph of female attractiveness by age

Retard alert, probably a ptg poster. The kikes and their media are DOWNPLAYING the virus to keep ZOG from falling apart.

haha big red line go down

putting every penny i can get my hands on into aapl

Gib

>placing risky puts and buying up cheap oil stocks
Haha oh boy oh boy what am I doing?!?

NEVER FEAR JEROME IS HERE
MONEY PRINTER ACTIVATED

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This

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The priced in thing is a meme. Nobody thinks it's priced in, and if people unironically took a meme and thought it was real, then they're retarded.

im all for a reset, i just want to not starve in the process, know what i mean?

NOT SO FAST BEAR! IT'S GOING UP NOW! TODAY IS A BULL DAY

The difference is that I'm wearing seatbelts, have airbags, crash insurance on the car unlike the others.

(((Discord))) banned the Yas Forums server, get in the new one bros
discordb gg kjGsbrW
Watch it all burn with us

Scooped some Ford puts. They just closed factories in Asia and Africa.

Do you understand option? Because if you don't you can be made liable to buy the underlying assets which will fucking bankrupt you.

35k 20x Leverage user probably got BTFO

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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>Put a buy order at the beginning of the pump
>Price comes down while I take a shit
>Instant 20 points

This market, I fucking love it

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I CANT FUCKING LOG IN TO ROBINHOOD REEE

>Trusting RH with a million dollars
You're a champion, user. Balls of steel.

Get in the fucking bag mumu

Kek lame and seether pilled

>1.3 mil on fucking robinhood

JEEEEZ YOURE FUCKING AUTISTIC

I'm unironically waiting in line to get into the supermarket. It's coming to you soon, burgerbros

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