Who would you rather serve under?

I'd want to serve under Kirk, I feel like the rest would be inclined to ignore me at first, even if it was important. Kirk doesn't mess around but he's not stuck up and might even stop to chat to average crewmembers.

Horrible racist afflicted with awful racism (which I hate) here but the objective fact is that only one of those pictured knew how to throw a baseball and only one of them FUCKING PUNCHED GOD IN THE FUCKING FACE. In your heart you know it's gotta be authentic Cajun cooking all the way.

To serve under its:
Archer>Kirk>Sisko>Picard>Insaneway
Archer and Kirk actively care about their crews, even though Kirk's have the stereotype of dying on away missions it actually isn't that bad. I'm one of the only trek fans who hasn't seen many DS9 episodes but from the one's I've seen Sisko seems like a pretty cool guy. Picard does care deeply about his crew yes, but it would be hard to work for a guy who is so cold. And Janeway is well...Janeway.

Archer also has the best track record on the show for keeping crew members alive, so bonus points.

Picard seemed to care the most about not getting people killed.

I'm having a hard time figuring out which average crew member has the best life expectancy

Fuck it's actually Archer isn't it

Enterprise D seems comfy. Can have my family there, do my job, fuck my waofu on the holodeck. So Picard I guess.

>Horrible racist afflicted with awful racism (which I hate) here
>tfw was incredibly liberal and progressive my whole entire life
>tfw have started to become racist, homophobic, and misogynist because of coming here for years
I fucking hate this fucking place, goddamn.

Nah, people die under Picard all the time. The issue is that they never show it, only talk about it in passing.
>Commander that Borg attack just killed 18 crewmembers!
>Damn them number one!
In comparison all the deaths in TOS are very blatantly shown but numerically don't add up as high.

if u wanted to mess around with the holodeck then ds9 is probably the best/ least lethal

It's something like twenty episodes into ENT that a random crew-member actually bites it. Somehow Archer's aura of optimism manages to protect all his dudes.

that's the power of Faith of the Heart

I feel like I'd probably have the highest chances of living if I was on DS9, so Sisko.

Didn't DS9 have a major battle take place there? When the D crashed wasn't everyone on the detached part?

Archer is the most militaristic in the show though, considering he loses a ship just before coalition-romulan war really kicks off, and even though those novels are little more than fanfiction; archer aquits himself honorably in combat and ends up forcing Romulans into a true when they had a massive advantage.

Pre-romulan war, he had best ratio for keeping people alive, after that he deals with unwinnable scenario, the first true galaxy war in anyone's memory and then ends up building the federation so if you survive the war, yeah you'll do well. Then again he only loses 20 people across the entire xindi war, so that was pretty good considering they were flying an archaic sub.

truce*

an empire which was probably hundreds of years ahead of earth and most of the other empires at the time, by the way.

Kirk would lead you straight in to danger so no. I would have to choose the biggest pussy of them all: Pickard

I would say Picard, but just finished rewatching the entire run of TNG and his faux concern for his crew is undermined by the situations he always found himself in.
The number of times the fate of the entire ship was in the hands of Data, a rare android, blew my mind. Had Data not been aboard the Enterprise wouldn't have lasted a year.

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There’s nothing wrong with embracing the truth user. Niggers are a plague.

Archer, unless I was a maco

Retard, fuck off

there are tons of tng episodes where the ship isnt in danger at all, and clearly mundane, unseen diplomatic events are occurring constantly between episodes

Yeah, the ability to not be knocked unconscious/disable when something would disable a normal human comes up surprisingly often.

Depends, am I on the senior staff? if so then Kirk or Janeway.

Am I just some random crewman? then Sisko or Archer.

>thought I was secretly racist most of my life
>Am actually bad at hiding it, everyone thinks I'm racist
>Yas Forums feels like home
But even I can't deny that Sisko is pretty based.

Had Data not been aboard, then Picard would have adjusted his actions accordingly.

And his speed at calculations, using the computer, his ability to link with the computer, his knowledge of any and everything, and his high-speed pure reason.

Kirk because Picard was an autistic fag

Janeway. Atleast I have a chance to fuck either her beautiful milf ass or 7's collectivized pussy.

>everyone choosing based on how long they might survive
You know on second thought this federation gig isn't all it's cracked up to be

Picard so I could bang Tasha aka the only attractive main character. I'd also kill Wesley.

Archer
He cares

the enterprise-d is by far the most comfy of those ships. with deep space nine coming in second. enterprise-d also has the most crew, giving me the greatest chance of having sex with someone.

This

Picard. All those other captains you would end up dead. Under Picard you get to hang out in 10 forward and the holodeck all day and not worry about shit

What about all the Cardies, the Dominion and the Klingons always trying to take over the station?

Kirk.

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Picard.
Sisko and Janeway are psychopathic warlords.
Archer was pure but untested. He nearly cracked during the war. However he was chill.

Ultimately the tie breaker is the fact that serving under Picard lets me live in the Enterprise D, the comfiest ship in the series.

Just imagine being on Kirk's Enterprise, especially on the bridge. Shoot the shit with Bones, Spock, Chekov, Scotty....just imagine bros.

Don't you have better chances of survival if you're not red shirt under Kirk?

The second episode of TNG had a problem that would have ended in death for the entire crew had it not been for Data's big dick brain. The entire series is filled with situations that Picard couldn't do shit about and required an entiely different character to solve the problem wholesale. And now with Picard being a thing, it's more or less canon that he was carried for at least for 15 years of captaining by his subordinates, most likely his whole life given how much of an idiot he seems to be without someone whispering in his ear.

Riker had the right idea not upgrading to starship captain for most all of his life, he essentially already had all the perks of being a captain without any of the downsides thanks to being number two to a senile old man. Now he gets to be a burden on his number two, too.

Better to rule in Hell than to serve in Heaven.

Kirk. Those guys seen all kinds of weird/wacky shit, everyone else basically did office work on space.

Sisko

Picard was a professional asshole

Picard is all over the place with the prime directive, but most of the time I distaste his boy scout attitude towards it
Archer is retarded
I haven't gotten to voyager or ds9 so
From that I'd go with Kirk, he's based and knows when something is fucked he'll fix it, and he also has a sexy space cat aboard his ship :3

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Archer easily

Archer seems like a bro so him

>implying you're better at picking up chicks than Bashir was.
Sisko. With Picard you might get BORGED, with Kirk you're a redshirt, Janeway is fucking nuts and Archer is just shit.
At least with Sisko you aren't going to get turned into a borg and you aren't stranded in the Delta quadrant.

Is Janeway really that bad?

Kirk

Do you have forehead ridges, a see through skull, spots all over your body or a third eye?
Didn't think so

Kirk is exactly like my dad so him.