>Without believing in a future life, I don't see what will change if I am remembered as a director or a pedophile. I only ask that my ashes be scattered near a pharmacy
Woody Allen's new memoires
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>Mia Farrow and her whole family was crazy
>Mia slept nude with her son Satchel (who later renamed himself Ronan)
>accusses Mia of touring orphanages in search of helpless children "like the one who flips through second-hand books"
>Allen claims starting dating Soon Yi when she was 22
>I only ask that my ashes be scattered near a pharmacy
I don't get it.
>Mia discovered the affair because he forgot some polaroids of a sex night with Soon Yi on the shelf of a window
>"I dislike having devoted so much space to the false accusation of which I have been a victim, but let's say that the matter has brought water to the writer's mill. After all, it has added a dramatic element to an otherwise quite banal"
>His own favourite movies are Bullets over Broadway and Wonder Wheel
>"How to summarize my life? So many stupid mistakes offset by luck. My biggest regret? That I had millions to make movies in complete freedom and I never filmed a masterpiece. If I could trade my talent for someone else's, living or dead, who would I choose? Bud Powell. Although Fred Astaire comes soon after. My favorite hero? Shane"
It's a joke about hypochondriacs
>His own favourite movies are Bullets over Broadway and Wonder Wheel
Really? a very mediocre Braodway play spoof and a generic love triangle? One would have at least assumed something like Radio Days because it seems so personal.
>My biggest regret? That I had millions to make movies in complete freedom and I never filmed a masterpiece
That's kinda interesting. Most people would argue he's made at least one or two masterpieces, like say Manhattan, Annie Hall, or Vicky Cristina Barcelona.
Ah, that would explain it.
>Manhattan, Annie Hall, or Vicky Cristina Barcelona.
It's Match Point and Hannah and her sisters and Curse of the Jade scorpion
>I never filmed a masterpiece.
Not true by the way
this disgusting old manlet pedophile kike has had sex and you are an incel
And how do you feel about that?
>his part in Crimes is the most closer to him
>Purple Rose is the film that best defines him and his movies
>Hillary Clinton declined her donation of $50,000.
>"I have never read Ulysses, Don Quixote, Lolita, Catch 22, 1984. I have never read a line by Virginia Woolf, E.M. Forster, D.H. Lawrence; The same goes for Dickens and the Brontë sisters."
>never read Ulysses, Don Quixote, Lolita, Catch 22, 1984.
This is exactly the kind of stuff that I find interesting and would love to read the book but I don't want to pay money for his memoir that would directly go to him due to the muddled "did he or did he not do it" thing.
>"I have never read Ulysses, Don Quixote, Lolita, Catch 22, 1984. I have never read a line by Virginia Woolf, E.M. Forster, D.H. Lawrence; The same goes for Dickens and the Brontë sisters."
He's better off, woefully overrated books by pseuds and academics
It's obvious he did not
The ebook has been on torrent trackers for days. Pirate that shit.
Call me old fashioned but I just can't get into ebooks. It has to be a physical book.
>Most people would argue he's made at least one or two masterpieces, like say Manhattan, Annie Hall, or Vicky Cristina Barcelona.
those movies suck
90% of the books I have are physical. I sub to Audible from time to time to listen to books while I work though. Some of those are really enjoyable like Beastie Boys Book narrated by them. Or Toast On Toast narrated by Matt Berry in character.
I kinda know the feeling, but when it comes to trash like this a digital version is usually good enough.
>>his part in Crimes is the most closer to him
Seems about right
O.W.: I hate Woody Allen physically, I dislike that kind of man.
H.J.: I’ve never understood why. Have you met him?
O.W.: Oh, yes. I can hardly bear to talk to him. He has the Chaplin disease. That particular combination of arrogance and timidity sets my teeth on edge.
H.J.: He’s not arrogant; he’s shy.
O.W.: He is arrogant. Like all people with timid personalities, his arrogance is unlimited. Anybody who speaks quietly and shrivels up in company is unbelievably arrogant. He acts shy, but he’s not. He’s scared. He hates himself, and he loves himself, a very tense situation. It’s people like me who have to carry on and pretend to be modest. To me, it’s the most embarrassing thing in the world—a man who presents himself at his worst to get laughs, in order to free himself from his hang-ups. Everything he does on the screen is therapeutic.
Interesting. I'd say that Broadway Danny Rose and Annie Hall are masterpieces. I think he's faking modesty. To be honest
This is seriously one of the great roasts. I never tire of reading it and savoring each word
It's rubbish. Orson tries to justify/ rationalize his valid subjective dislike. I hate this type of snivelling crybabies.
uh oh
Charles Dickens is a Literary God.
I think, like most artists, he's just his own worst critic. Nothing ever is as good as he wants it to be. Remember, he's known to re-shoot large parts of a movie just because he thought an actor he cast in the role didn't work out.
t. has never read a book, listens to Frank Ocean
How did his movies make money with goys? Like how could goys relate to this. We don't have stuff like competing to be the sickest in our culture. All this stuff 'gotta live near a pharmacy' is like relatable to every jews but only them.. why is he famous
Anxiety and neuroticism are pretty big in city dwellers
i get that but it's not the same. show that pharmacy joke to 100 jews they'll all laugh and no goys would get it
Explain the joke.
the fucking guy said: Jewish people sit around at dinner competing as to who has the most conditions and who's been diagnosed the sickest and needs the most medications (and it's all completely imagined)
city Goys might get anxious but that sort of shit isn't in their culture
How ironic they are all equally sick with the worse disease to have, Judaism.
I miss him so damn much
Apparently you’ve never spent time around old people when they talk to each other
Absolute patrician user
Didn't this old kike literally marry his daughter?
hot damn user
No, just his gf's daughter
Jew detected
I still don't get it
>disgustingly slime kike atheist pederast
he will not be missed
Someone mind providing a link? Can't find it on any trackers.
this move is too depressing
He is so hypochondriac he wants to be near a pharmacy even after being cremated
I think if you look into it, it's quite obvious he didn't do it. Even then, why not go to a library?
Since so many of hus characters are self insert, why not make a film about the accusation thing and put in actual facts about it like the fbi thinking mia had coached the children? I think it would open a lot of people's eyes.
i watched his films when i was a kid and they fucked me up desu, made a neurotic lunatic i am today. i guess ratings exist for a reason
>why not make a film about the accusation thing and put in actual facts about it like the fbi thinking mia had coached the children?
That would not look good at all, if anything, it would make him look guilty. It's like Polanski's last film where he compared himself in interviews to the protagonist who was being persecuted. This from a guy who fled justice for decades after a statutory rape charge.
How did Allen's movies influence you? You started compulsively imitating an anxious, neurotic jew down to his speech pattern?
Ah fuck. Okay, you've convinced me. Where is the EPUB? Link it now and I will read it.
Angry, bitter, resentful and slightly jealous.
At best he makes shitty movies. At worst he's a pedophile. Fuck this assclown
Polanski told a story about a falesly accused man and then compared himself to him, what I'm saying is that Allen tells his own story. I think a lot of ppl would come out of that with a new perspective.
Respectfully, I think that's very naive. People have essentially already made their minds up about him, he's frequently mentioned in the same sentences as Roman Polanski. Any film or media he makes trying to paint his side would be received very poorly and angrily by people.
I can see why you would rename yourself from satchel. Imagine being named after a bag
and Orson was a fat autist
Sure but if so many believe that, he doesn't exactly have much to lose.
Eyes Wide Shut was a documentary