/brit/

literally nothing wrong with being a self-respecting monogamous being who rejects the motive of casual sex

Everyone is an incel at the moment even slags because of lockdown. Our celibacy was involuntarily imposed on us by the government

Okay VF.

alri

yeah nah ay
wbu

>Everyone is an incel at the moment even slags because of lockdown
How old are you?

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sick and tired of hearing the word 'incel'

niggas is so gangsta, niggas is thugs
niggas'll spend their whole life peddling drugs

drinking tea

bet she has one very grim face

The twerk began as an African tribal mating dance
Wonder why Stacey is doing it

Then have sex.

incels are monumental pussies who are so self-obsessed that they will not let the possibility of rejection come near their previous and beta egos

who was in the wrong here?

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poo

There was another redditor who posted about their bf raping the dog, lol.
She only realized because the dog started being afraid of him.

youtube.com/watch?v=GsMWhARlURM

haha its got super hans from peep show in

poo nigger

Posting with the lads on /brit/

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24, why?

As a 5'8 man with an attractive face I can honestly say if it wasn't for swipe apps I wouldn't be half as much of a shagger.

Imagine being around in 2005 and having to trawl clubs. Would be hopeless.

>sam bender
shan't be listening

okay but yeah

thread rules:

more of this:
less of this

haha alri

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Disgusting.

mate you are sooooo original calling him that

youtube.com/watch?v=0KrdJHwdBFI

the cellulitecel

stop taking credit for the structure of your DNA and your uncontrollable environment during the most vulnerable and early stages of human life
cringe lord

classic callum

handsy mcgropyson on the right there
the other lads are clearly trying to have a nice time and he's just shoved in

People will always fuck. Nothing will stop that. It’s human nature.

Yes.

Can we have 2 mins silence for Holocaust Remembrance Day

What are you planning on naming your gf?

have sex

Incels absolutely seething because they weren't born into the top 0.01% of men.

Women were more likely to shag after meeting in a club then though, I’ve noticed a massive drop in the last 5 years.

incel

*farts*

sorry, I'm a bit gassy today

good song to tell you the truth

the singularity of man

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In person is easier. I don't know about clubs but I assume even in a club environment, it is easier.
There is only so much one Chad can give attention to in person.
Usually on night outs there are a lot of girls hanging around with their gfs because they have not been picked up yet.
Chad is not interested in them because he is already busy.

On the Tinder, those same girls would have 88342 matches.

based starmer. boy down and kiss our feet goy

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doing a poo

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Me? Born into the top 40% of men. Which isn't saying much but I do ok

get a grip and get a root pussy

he's got a kike hand stuck up his arse right to the elbow

>>sam bender
>shan't be listening

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having some lovely chickpea stew

based women

not incel but i dont shag or try to. after i split from the ex i said i'll not bother with it for a while and focus on other things but its been a few years now and im starting to think having a gf would have made me more focused on the other stuff to start with and kept me on track. said no to sex a few times too because i didnt like the girls and knew it would just be a shag but now i feel like i fucked it

I will, with a fit lady.
Pork is only good for roasting.

I won't.

cannot comprehend shagging

>tfw know a former colleague fancies me
>Tfw shes stupidly rich like mansion with swimming pool
>tfw dont find her at all attractive - physically or personality/interests
>tfw i am some sort of cel'

what do?

Alri Emma.

Chortle is an underused word

I find it easier on swipe apps personally. Maybe it's because of my height or maybe just because I'm an autist.

how are you getting tweets from tomorrow?

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This what this guy looks like irl btw

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haha look at this inshell

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fucks sake give it a rest rorke man

man up and become a gold digger mate

Beat your meat

a gf only serves as a distraction unless you're willing to make babies and settle down

screaming from the rooftops

shan't be listening to your bent music leftypol
now scurry off

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Partially true, but women don’t go back with guys for one night stands after a night out as much as they used to precisely because they have more choice on dating apps.
Used to be that if I knecked on with a girl in a club there was a huge chance she would come home with me. Six years on and I find myself still getting with as many girls as I used to when out but less are willing to go home

i'd say there's plenty of fish in the sea but i really doubt it

Me? Personally? I'm in the top 1 percentile of male height and male penis size, both flaccid and erect.

Me though? Personally speaking? Kissless virgin.

Girl told me I was top 20% of men, which means I'm actually top 2% of men.

might be the only adult human alive who hasn't seen this Tiger King show

Insanely grim. how do these people degrade to this level?

shut up you sunburnt muppet

according to the bible?

yes yes very funny haha love twitter dot com foward slash existentialcoms

Both. You heights gets you the match on Tinder.
In person your height would also give you immediate attention, but then if you cannot talk, they will get turned off quick quickly, whereas on the apps you might come off as more confident.

Uganda be kidding me

thought this was going to be a star wars themed strip club because of her blue skin lol

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4 cabs of Stella and a pack of Benson & edges please boss

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Uganda be kidding me haha

dropped.
get based kike destroyer corbyn back

ad hom

It's freaks posting made-up stories based on their own fetishes.

cant take it anymore
NEED to shag

>shan't be listening to your bent music leftypol
>now scurry off

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fucking hell

haven't watched it either

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men can have babies late into their 40's
no reason to waste your early years on pussy

But I'm below average height...

Birds online:
>He has to be 6ft 5
>Look like an actor
>Bodybuilders physique
>Have a sports car
>Be well off
>Be a 24/7 jester and going out of his way to dance for me because I have a 100 other men in my inbox

Birds offline:
>He smiled at me in the queue so I sucked his cock
>He took me for a walk (because I am a woman and therefore like a dog) then we went back to mine and fucked
>He made me feel silly so I started to fancy him
>He ignored me so I started to fancy him
>He started to like my friend so I started to fancy him
etc

what leads you to this conclusion?

yeah but if you get a younger gf when you're old people will call you a nonce

>inshell

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one on the left looks like a girl i know that was all oer me

Based. I'm waiting until my 50s personally.

oh no, not the n word

>It's all just ammunition for the right-wing press
>The patriarchy is real, the proof is here in my song
>I'll sit and mansplain every detail of the things it does wrong
>'Cause I'm a white male, full of shame
>My ancestry is evil, and their evil is still not gone

>I wanna be anybody but me
>I wanna be anybody but me

why is sam fender such a massive c uck?

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You know you are a personality when you have not one but three obsessive anons. Wish they would add this to their names so they can be identified

Council estate pussy user
Scared to fight me user
Peado that is obsessed with Methody user

more like sam bender

"accidentally" starting a zoom conference with porn on a shared screen is a toilberg power move

12 hours of sleep a day and it still doesn't feel like enough

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yes and?

any /overworked and underpaid/ man in?

My tinder profile bio?

>6'7"
>those are two different measurements
Works flawlessly. Joke's on them though, because it is actually just one measurement: my height. Gets slags easy though.

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>sam fender
literally who

have sex

All stations, FIRECAMP transmitting, break
Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo Juliett Alpha November November India Echo Sierra
FIRECAMP out

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kek back at uni i got a date by saying my phones broken but i need a new profile pic

then the girl took the pic and sent it to me over whatsapp

then i asked her out and she was like ye

can i connect a dslr to the computer and us it as a webcam

i am unironically 6'7" and this is my bio as well

Snails are genderfluid?

the labour party might be forced to pay millions due to their own incompetence with data protection, hmm okay.

If you had to get 5 (You)s off one post or you die how would you do it?
I'd pretend to have a rolex

He's literally right though

Yep. Women online have the upper hand and the power went to their heads. In real life, they are just what they are, the weak sex, that you can persuade with a bit of smarts.

more like spam blender

get a uganda proxy

who the fuck is sam fender

need my willy to be an inch longer

go home, your big gun doesn't make your penis any larger, have sex incel

he's the biggest current "indie" (he's signed to a major label and controlled by kikes) artist amongst gen zedders and a few millennials and he sings songs about hating himself because he's white and brown people are superior and should be worshipped

good lad. mad how they ALWAYS ask about the measurements first thing and are never disapponited when they're told that the "7 inches" part isn't actually about my dick, but just a joke about being 6'7".

my dick is actually 7.7 inches tho.

theyre hermies yeah

lanklets

Dont get it

At that height you'd get matched even if you literally had a micro penis.
Girls don't care so much about sex. It's all about having the tallest bf in their social circle.

yeah haha that's definitely the reason why you don't shag...
state of you freaks

Don't understand where you even go to meet women in real life anymore now nightclubs don't exist.

was unironically using that bio 4 years ago
be original

thought that was lewis capaldi

ive got a 7.5 inch willard but when im shagging it doesn't feel big like porn dicks even though most porn dicks are supposedly only like 7 inches

sounds like a gay cunt

wow gfs

tweaked my laptop color scheme de lads

old -> new

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5'9"

those are two different measurements

why would i? it works. sorry to hear you're only 6' though lad.

you can meet women through friends
i dont have a single friend though

>He's literally right though

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>most porn dicks are supposedly only like 7 inches
this is a cope
most top-tier male performers have BIG willies

swear no massive cultural changes have occured in the past 20 years

Only difference is Lewis Capaldi has a scottish accent that appeals to mongs on twitter who talk like get tae fuck and all that.

Arrange meetings online.
Talk to ones outside.

alright david mate havent seen you in ages

>Download tik tok
>Buncha teenagers talking about sex, parties, drugs
Anyone else fuck up there youth not doing anything

guarantee im taller than you lol

gets smaller during shagging innit
rock hard is like 2 extra inches

haha you're right mate *earns 20,000 quid for posting a picture of some lipstick on instagram to supplement the 45,000 i earn every month off onlyfans, while swiping left on every man under 6'5" on tinder*

mine is less than 6 inches and i feel quite uncomfortable making jokes about how big it is. because it is proportionately tiny

Apart from social media, we haven’t evolved much past the 90’s.

brown hands

>He's literally right though

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He's lying
Sam Fender is nothing like that if you actually knew him

ate six dry slices of white bread for lunch

no this is /brit/, we're all normal here and we don't tolerate virgins

I already told you I'm 6'7" lad lol

am the opposite. constantly making jokes about how big it is, but also constantly making jokes about how tiny it is, because i'm confident in my penis' size.

>Arrange meetings online.
All such places behave exactly like Tinder.

alri soph

none of you pansies would last a day in bolton

You arrive in pyengyang

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you're depressed lad

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some ACTUAL lyrics from his ACTUAL song

>It's all just ammunition for the right-wing press
>The patriarchy is real, the proof is here in my song
>I'll sit and mansplain every detail of the things it does wrong
>'Cause I'm a white male, full of shame
>My ancestry is evil, and their evil is still not gone

>I wanna be anybody but me
>I wanna be anybody but me

ah yes, because that affects everyone in society. spastic

This, the virgins will scream about how it isn't the case but from day one this was a shaggers general

>2 toast sandwiches
alri bloater

okay but who was at fault here?

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